May 07 - W/C -22nd Jan 07

[Frenchsmallfry]

Morning....

Think I've got a reputation I don't deserve! It's LG&T that has the pirate porn, I was merely writing the script for it.

Of all the things to be most remembered for I think it's gingerbread and pirate porn from now on.

I've been misrepresented.

Glad J's feeling better!

Hello. Really sorry to hear about DH's job Lupins. Likewise FSF, hope your DH decides to rejoin the work of work soon.

LG&T - I don't know how you do it. Did you manage to bribe them to be good with the promise of McD's? Must be lovely for them to have each other though. I never thought that my house was a bit dull with just mum and me, but I suppose it must have been!

How did you get on with the midwife LW?

SOH - can you put some boards under your mattress on your bed, rather than sleeping on the floor?

Managed to wake up in a complete stinker of a humour this morning. Not helped by the fact I fell asleep curled up in a ball on a 2 seat sofa until 4.30 am, then DH had put the heating on continuous and I woke up at 8.30 in bed unable to breath between the heating and the sun streaming in the curtainless windows (which is generally a nice experience if the heating isn't on!). Then proceeded to shout at everyone, swore at DD about her habit of leaving her underwear inside her clothes in the washing basket, huffed and puffed. Brought washing to laundrette (new machine not arriving til Feb 10th), got Halfords to fit a new rear bulb in my car and was just starting to feel a bit calmer when I had to brake hard coming down my road (someone walked in front of hte car in front) and my car slid down the wet hill into the back of a monstrous Mercedes 4x4. My fault of course, as I'm sure I should have been further back. Woman in Merc got out becuase "she heard a bang". She didn't even feel the impact in her big tank. I had just pulled off in traffic so wasn't going more than 10mph. You couldn't even see where my car hit her. I didn't even move the dust on it. My little tin can couldn't stand up to it though, and the bonnet has popped up out of place. Booo.

Thought DH was going to have a fit, but he was actually ok as he knows I'm usually a safe driver. It's just so bloody frustrating.

Going to get this and another dent (from years ago just after I got my licence) fixed and then hopefully not have to do anything else to it until we sell in May. DH has (thankfully) come round to the idea that it will be a faff having a 3 door car, trying to get a baby in and out the back etc. Plus, when he saw how a 10mph bump could bash the bonnet like that, he'd like his new baby in a safer car.

Have had a bacon sandwich and a twix and a cup of tea and feel considerably better.

DD's "boyfriend" has just come over on the bus and they've gone to the park. DH usually vetoes it any time she asks to see said boy, so I said he could come over here. Think DH then realised it was less hassle for us to let them off to the park than have them hanging round the living room with us. Hehehe. "Boyfriend" is a little runt of a thing (though nice and polite and seems well dragged up), about a foot smaller than DD and seems very immature compared to her, so am not too worried about what they might "get up to".

Oh TYG you poor old thing. Glad you're feeling a bit calmer now, but sounds very stressful. Sometimes I'm glad we don't own a car (DH drove ours into a field and bent the chassis in September and we can't afford to replace). Take it easy now. Very sweet that DD has a boyfriend. Does she boss him around? I seem to remember being quite bossy at that age!

WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW!

Postie has just dragged his sorry self up the drive with.... A PARCEL FULL OF BOUNTY CAKE.

iths luvvervbly LG&T hath bighthest thmile on thface.

You're very naughty. Now, what can I send you in return?? Any special requests or shall I surprise you?

You're such an angel.

at your dd having boyfriend!!! That is one part of parenting i am soooo not ready for. Poor you even having to think about what they might get 'up to'.....

Also bummer about the crash, were you ok? No whiplash or tummy pain> Glad dh is getting you a new car in May, something else to look forward to as well as a baby

LWatkins how was the midwife?

SOH that you have not got your cake yet, next time i will send it to work. Your poor back too, i just got a new mattress last Nov and im so pleased i did. There is no way i could have coped on our old one for another pregnancy.

The kids have been banished to their room on several occasions and when Hugs went to sleep at lunchtime i went to bed too. Woke to the sounds of Phin and a twin near killing each other, they woke up Hugs too. I have no idea what to do with them. They know im stressed and very angry, if i give dd the 'help me' spiel she uses it to the full and bosses everyone around making her brothers go in to orbit....not worth the hassle.

Im soooo mad, must be calm > Ex p has not even bothered sending Hugs a birthday card either for him and the others. He is such and a-hole

Serves me right, I think I was already on the lookout for parking. Thanks, though, SOH.

I remember your husband crashing the car. It was such a shock for you. Did you say he's still not happy about getting back behind the wheel - even if you did replace the car?

Anyone got plans this weekend? My dad is coming over tomorrow and I was going to invite over another couple he knows and their kids, but I don't actually feel able. I think I'll give myself a break! Dad will happily sit around listening to the footie and drinking cider. I don't need to entertain.

Oh i am pleased SOH, lol at berating of postie in last post!!! You stuff your face and feed Matilda an alternative food group to Gingerbread...

No surprises necessary, it has made me smile to think of surprise cake in the post for pregnant women, that could be a business venture worth taking on...

Deliveries of cake to pregnant women depending on their cravings. Coal cake anyone???? Heeee heeee

Yay for SOH's cake arriving! It's yummy isn't it. There isn't a crumb left of mine! Whoops!

LG&T, that's so mean about no card. What a muppet. I feel really sorry for you having such a time of it today. Know what you mean about little girls and giving them a licence to be bossy. Mine could be like that. And yes, SOH, she does seem ot be bossy with the boyfriend.

I think it's all very innocent LG&T. I was a bit worried about it, but read a great book about understanding "tweens". Must send it to you, actually. It goes from about 9 yrs old. It explains how they're "trying out" what it might be like to be a teenager and we as parents react as if they ARE teenagers and we worry too much. Seems that younger girls like the "idea" of having a boyfriend, but they don't actually want to take it any further than that and in fact the very idea of more than holding hands is terrifying. I do actually kind of remember that. I didn't snog a boy until I was 13 and I remember having boyfriends before that and it taking about 6 months to ever get around to brushing his hand with mine, never mind holding hands.

So that kind of put my mind at ease. I know there are lots of cases of 12 year olds being sexually active and it does shock me, what I overhear sometimes. However, I am learning to trust my judgement of my own child a bit more and I just have to hope I'm not proved wrong!

Oh you are such a sensible mummy TYG, the book sounds great. I am dreading that part of Phin's life, i was umm....erm....an early starter and i have visions of Phin following in my footsteps and all i will be able to do is say noooooo. I may employ the denial tactic, i was a saint till i was 18 etc, etc...

I was a late "starter" (see comment re not snogging until 13); however, I seemed to make up for lost time after that and I can honestly say that the main reason was so I could be "first" to do things.

Read a great comment - I think it was a post on here - from someone whose mum used to tell her kids "not to be heroes" as teenagers. Accepted that they would drink behind her back, but said, "Don't drink the most, or the fastest. You don't have to show off and you don't have to say you don't drink - just always be in the background with those things and you'll never get into trouble."

Was pretty sound advice I think and I even managed to use a similar vein with DD recently over wanting to go on "dates". I mean, dates, at 11 years old! Apart from how laughable it is to go on a "date" and have your mum pay for both you and your boyfriend!

Anyway, told her she was too young to be planing cinema trips with boys and that she could go in a group (and knows I would drop her off to check), but going on her own was too much too soon and she was only putting herself under pressure to maybe do things she didn't want to. Told her she didn't have to do everything other people did and that the celebrity of being "first" person in the class to go on a date just wouldn't last and it's not worth putting yourself in that position. She seemed quite relieved actually.

Mathilda (eons into the future) will not be having boyfriends. She will be reading character-forming literature and practicing calisthenics on a daily basis. At least two hours per evening will be spent on the improvement of her mind. I will be telling her at a suitable age that I was a virgin until last August when through no fault of my own DH got me pregnant. Honest.

DH crashed the car the day afterI went to A&E with bleeding and the same day that the landlords told us they were selling up. He wasn't concentrating and was hurrying to be with me. He is petrified of driving again- well remembered TYG- but I think the police force will expect him to drive so that will force him to confront it. I'm too scared to even learn to drive.

Got a cup of earl grey and second piece of cake now [biffa emoticon required].

Sounds quite stalkerish but DH and I were talking about your ex-twonk in bed last night LG&T. We have a friend whose dp left her when she was 8 months pg with her third and shacked up with somebody else- huge probs with getting maintenance (he earns a fair bit) and he's always threatening her with something- court, social services, his presence etc. We think her xp and yours must have been separated at birth. Anyway, I digress, I wondered to myself last night if he'd at least send a card for Hugs. Not surprised that he didn't but for him. Still, he's got a supermum which makes up for everything. Like my friend's ex, he does at least make very lovely children, despite how maddening they are.

I think it's nice that we talk about each other in our "real lives". It's like we're "real" mates iyswim.

Ah you are so sweet SOH. Im sure the only reason i have not jumped in the car and fled is you lot on here. Also

You just know that auntie LG&T is gonna be spilling the beans about pirate porn talk on a public forum.....lol at you taking on the porn 'junkie' title too. What with you taking that title and TYG being the 'real' mother of my children sometimes i feel im gettiing off rather spondiferously (made that word up im sure)

Im debating a beach walk, if only to leave the house and stop at the shop to buy supplies (chocolate, sweeties, sat paper)

I started far too young TYG, and i was abit bonkers till i was about 16 when i settled down with my first long term BF. Im so gonna pay with Phin.......

Phin might be more sensible than you! S is definitely more chilled and relaxed and generally more sensible than me. Poor child has tutted at me more than once when I've had my head down the toilet after a big night out. She thinks I'm quite irresponsible!

DD and boyfriend are back now anyway. I'd say it was fooking freezing up in the park at Alexandra Palace. It's the highest point for miles!

They're sitting here playing Star Wars on playstation and when they were out of the room getting drinks, DH has imparted his wisdom to me and said that the fact the b/f hasn't discovered hair gel or hair syling yet is a very good sign. No chance of him being a sexual predator until he's discovered hair styling, apparently. Since DH now doesn't care whether his hair is styled or not, I suppose that must mean he's reached a different stage of his life.

I was a total geek at school- was little and had braces. Only time a chap asked me out was as a dare and as I stuttered 'yes please' (see even spoke like a geek) his mates all leapt out and laughed at me.

Oh the intolerable cruelty!

Still, met DH and- even if I do say so myself- have the happiest and most fulfilling marriage I could wish for. In retrospect, I am glad that I didn't start too young as my only real experience is with DH and it has been all that mushy, yucky, rosy sort of film romance that I probably wouldn't have had at 14 with a bag of chips and a quick snog behing the bike sheds. Oh how I yearned at the time though. Didn't even want the bag of chips first, I just wanted somebody to take an interest. I was cripplingly shy (still am in rl) and I am probably so worried about having a little girl because I think she'll turn out as anxious and shy as I was.

This is like a therapy session isn't it?

LG&T what irks most about everybody hurling the porn accusations in my direction is the sad admission that I actually haven't ever watched a porn film. Am I missing out?!

Crikey, you should see DH's hair. I wonder what phase he is in. Certainly not the romancing ladies stage, which I suppose I should be grateful for. Let me see if I can find a pic for you all...

Afternoon ladies

LW i know im a bit slow and everyone has said the same type of thing (have only just caught up on all the posts) but i am so at the people you have to deal with at Uni. When i had ds1 i was almsot at the end of my course and i had nothing but support from my lecturers. Two weeks before my due date I was told that I didnt have to worry about attending every day that notes would be kept on anything i missed and they would do anything they could help. When i went into labour on the day of a exam they told me not to worry and as long as i let them know how it all went that they would rearrange it for me. I had nothing but help and support from my lecturers and that is what you deserve too. As for that bloke telling you to terminate i reckon all of us should get together and show him what an arse he is. Hope it all works out for you.

Happy birthday Hugs Now you are a big boy you need to look after mummy, tell your naughty siblings to behave

LG&T sorry you are having such a bad day. I get stressed when my two argue and annoy each other, there is no way i could cope with 5 of them at it. Roll on summer when you can kick them outside and have a bit of peace If your anything like me i bet you are counting down the minutes until bedtime

'slap face' I love that name, doesnt sound very medical though does it. My neighbours daughter had it about a month ago, i think it took about four days for her face to return to normal. Hope your blood results come back ok

FSF i like your pram. Im still watching mine, it doesnt finish until tomorrow evening and AFAIK we are going to MIL's tomorrow so im going to show her and tell her what a bargain it is

ooops phones ringing be back in a mo

Just baking dh his birthday cake. Didnt really feel like it but thought i had better make the effort.

Ella will not be having boyfriends until she is 30 according to dh!

Think i am going to have ago at making some of lovely squidge. Have a nice multi pack of mars bars in the cupboard. Would any one like me to send them some?? It is very yummy.....

Ooh forgotten about squidge, I scribbled down the recipe ages ago and meant to make it but didn't get round to it. Ooh temptation.

Considering going to shop for mars bars!

so yummy and so easy to make! thats the best bit about it. If you are feeling slightly healthy it is nice with rasins!

at feeling healthy, just eaten two pieces of LG&T's bounty cake! Although, raisins and maybe some golden syrup with it sounds lovely!

SOH - I was an awful geek for years. I still have elements of geekiness. DH often comments on my "anorak" moments. I don't know if other kids laughed at me, but the point was that I thought everyone was laughing at me.

Honestly, there were times in my teenager years where they must have been laughing. For someone whose mum was a hairdresser - I asked her to give me some hideous hairdos. And mum thought it was better to let me wear the hideous stuff I asked for rather than telling me in a stern manner that I looked ridiculous.

I think having DD was the thing that really turned me around and gave me some confidence.

Afternoon, Pebble and April.

So you have eaten a massive amount of LG&T's cake and you are still considering squidge.... Well at least its giving Mathilda a varied diet

Hi there TYG

Updated profile for a while so you can see me and DH on our wedding day (just so you can laugh at his hair really- I loved it and he grew it just for me). Plus a recent one to show that he now looks entirely sane.

Will take them off later so laugh away while you can.

Aah I hope Mathilda inherits DH's natural curls!