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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

April 2015 thread 7: Our viable, wriggling bumps have us walking belly-first into the new year!

999 replies

BrixtonBunny · 22/12/2014 16:14

New thread xx

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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SquattingNeville · 08/01/2015 22:07

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cinnamongreyhound · 08/01/2015 22:09

Should say women who want to bf are well support.

RL20 · 08/01/2015 22:12

Wow lots of answers thank you! I didn't think there would be so many different views and experiences! There's lots I've got to think about!
X

BrixtonBunny · 08/01/2015 22:12

Squatting my mum's given me an Ina May Gaskin book on breastfeeding - can't wait to read it!

Currently reading a fab book that I would recommend to anyone who's interested in having a natural birth (realise this isn't everyone and I have no judgement) - "Hypnobirthing" by Marie Mongan. I'm only 60 or so pages in but totally hooked - it's making me very excited for birth!

OP posts:
SquattingNeville · 08/01/2015 22:18

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BrixtonBunny · 08/01/2015 22:25

Squatting I'll definitely get it, thanks! We're going to NCT classes and will definitely inform myself about potential interventions in case we need to make decisions - but am definitely going to try and go into birth hoping and planning for a hippy birth!

OP posts:
daholster · 08/01/2015 22:28

Bathing - we top and tailed dd in her little bath (enough water in just to put her bottom in but umbilical cord stump well clear of the water) and did cotton wool on head and bottom. We used oilatum once she was a couple of months old because of dry skin but it mad her too slippery to hold. Until then it was just water. We switched to infacare and that was much better, with Aveeno cream after her bath. A bath is a part of her bedtime routine too. Bath, pyjamas, story with a drink her room, bed. When she was tiny it was bath, sleepsuit, milk sitting on our bed, bed.

Breastfeeding... I had a torrid time trying to bf but stuck at it with lots of support. It took 2-3 days for my milk to properly come in, and a full 24hrs to even get much colostrum. I got literally 3 drops on day one by hand expressing and was so worried dd would starve but they have a bit of reserve. It was painful - and expressing was too. After 10 days a community midwifery assistant with specialist breast feeding knowledge happened to visit and told me to stop trying to feed 2 hourly as they had told me on the transitional care unit and just feed on demand, which helped, and she corrected dad's latch, which felt amazing... It suddenly hurt a lot less. I had 2 days of bliss... Then dd got thrush from antibiotics I had to have (because I had retained placenta, omg a whole other story, I told them the was something not right and eventually a week later someone listened and I ended up admitted on IV antibiotics and had a D&C under a general anaesthetic when she was only a week old!!!)

Now, people who have no experience of thrush and bfing, please listen up - any time you get given antibiotics while feeding, check lots for your doc getting white patches on their tongue. If they get it, don't let the dr or MW fob you off with gel anti fungals for baby alone... YOU need them too. Don't let the GP tell you to out the baby's mouth gel on your nipples either, it doesn't work!!! Otherwise you get thrush in your nipples, then breasts, and it's awful!!!

Signs of thrush in your nipples - cracking, redness, dry/peeling, painful feeding (especially which had been ok before). Once it spreads back into your milk ducts they tingle lots and get painful too. I couldn't wear clothes all the time it wasn't properly treated. As soon as dd stopped the meds I reinfected her and we would be back to square one. I got brilliant support re position and latch from my local breastfeeding advisor at the group she runs (drop in) which was great. Eventually she wrote to my doctor for me and said I needed better anti fungal treatment for me, and so once dd was 6 weeks old I was finally allowed tablets (her liver wasn't developed enough to cope with the drug til then) and suddenly breastfeeding became absolutely wonderful. I loved it, it made me so happy. I was so proud that I stuck with it and loved the cuddles and how special it felt. I expressed so dh could feed her if needed in the night when I was ill or whatever but she wasn't that keen on bottles when she was little. I was gutted at 16 weeks when it was all going so well that my meds had to change, I went onto arsenic (!) and had to stop. It broke my heart a little bit to lose that, especially when she was rooting around and asking for the boob for comfort.

So apart from the selfish "it's lovely" stuff the health benefits for dc are significant, conferring your immunity to any bugs you have or fall foul of. You get a cold, doc doesn't because your antibodies pass through in your milk. Also yes it seems to reduce allergies. But there is no point in being an unhappy breastfeeding mummy and worrying and resenting your doc for pain/sadness/knackeredness if it isn't working for you, formula is perfectly safe.

lucy go on the breastfeeding net?ork. There is a pharmacist on there you can email. She sends all the relevant excerpts from any information and research gathered re the drug, there should be plenty on infliximab. She was an absolute star re my 6MP and other meds and is who prompted me to perhaps ask for blood tests for dd when she was born and I was bfing. I'll try to find the link for you. Ask about infliximab. The stuff on the NACC is a bit scanty isn't it? But if you aren't sure formula is fine - but I cried about the prospect of not even being able to try too. And plenty of tears when I was forced to stop!

Dd pooed in the bath for the first time today. We whipped her out and then more on her towel then we stuck her on the loo, she was so upset because I think she knew she had done something not right and was probably gutted about it. She's never done it before. It was so gross to clean up... Not sure if we are brave enough to try the toilet training, she loves sitting on the loo but I don't think she really has a clue what she should be doing there! Plus, she weed on the floor and my leg (clean trousers!) BEFORE the bath and I stuck her on the loo and she finished it there. She was looking so proud of herself and I was very sad that she was so upset post the poo incident - I guess she sat there all wet and cold while we flapped about and she cried for ages, I feel so sad for her.

Anyway, she's tucked up in bed now. I love her so much. I feel so lucky to think I might have another little person soon to love, I don't know how I could possibly love another one as much as I do dd but I am assured by many that I will be able to! Lucky me Smile

By the way re bonding - I didn't bond straight away and I'm not sure I truly loved her properly until about 6 weeks, it was hard and I worried about it. I was happy to look after her but didn't feel like mummy. Then suddenly at 6 weeks we were in the garden together and I was showing her the flowers, and I suddenly had a rush of love, and realised that I would do ANYTHING for her, leap in front of a car, whatever, to protect her. And I cried. It was lovely.

I will post a photo of the clothes we have at some point this weekend if I can make it work!

Wow what a super long post. I'll have cross posted with loads of you sorry! I hope some of it is useful!

26+2

cinnamongreyhound · 08/01/2015 22:29

Best way I think BrixtonBunny, until I knew about my baby's kidney problem I was hoping that this was going to be my non intervention hippy birth, ever optimistic! I still wrote a birth plan with ds2 and once we've spoken to the neonatal Dr to find what's actually possible I will again!

Cisforcat · 08/01/2015 22:30

Hippy birth- haha that's made me giggle!

I never did a birth plan with DD as I was happy to just see what happens. Just as well really - 15 days late, 3 days of being induced ending in forceps, episiotomy and haemorrhage.
Mind you it's made me want to do one this time as I really would like it as natural as possible given my first was anything but!
I'd love a water birth ( still not confirmed if I'm allowed due to haemorrhage though) as that's what I've always had my heart set on.

Any one else? Any experience of
One? I've heard fabulous things about hyponobirthing too.

Hidingthefear · 08/01/2015 22:32

I'm hoping to breastfeed, and have bought an electric expresser from tommie tippie. Although I'm not really sure whwhat I'm doing. Some said you can just express some said you can't express before 6 weeks so I'm pretty confused.
Will seek professional advice as Mr Google isn't much help.
I do feel a little pushed into breastfeeding. By everyone. DH, family the world lol but ill see how I get on. I'm hopefully I can make it work as I'm lucky not to have any known medical issues. And the doctor didn't think the lump in my breaSt would affect milk when I asked a couple of years ago.
How do these nipple shields work? I've seen pictures of them when I was looking for pads but I don't get how they work. Will defo get some of that lanisoh cream, heard it mentioned a few times.

cinnamongreyhound · 08/01/2015 22:34

I also had thrush with ds1 daholster, hideous and as you say once treated was such a relief.

daholster · 08/01/2015 22:36

Oh dear my post sounds a) scary about thrush!!! Most people won't get it but I just wanted you to be aware of it. Painful feeding + white tongue = thrush and it will all improve if you can get it treated! don't given up!

And b) it sounds grey biased. I'm sorry. It isn't meant to be, I am like cinnamon and feel strongly that the benefits it confers to the dc (not doc as my iPad keeps autocorrecting it to!) health wise are important. BUT I also believe that formula feeding is safe, and effective, and is the right thing to do for some people. And that is absolutely fine too.

Hope I didn't irritate anyone Flowers

FizzyBubbly · 08/01/2015 22:38

Thyroid did affect my milk supply with DD but that was because it was undiagnosed at the time. By the time I started thyroxine at 5 months post partum the damage to my supply was already done. I totally understand what you mean by feeling heartbroken Ebwy! Expecting it to be fine now that my levels are stable. Think I'm going to aim to start by EBF then moving onto mixed feeding after a few months as I would like new DD to take a bottle but know that I'm not going to have the time to express

Re baths we used a support, from John Lewis IIRC, which DD was fine in until she started sitting unsupported at about 4/5 months, so will use it again unless new baby shows a dislike to it

cinnamongreyhound · 08/01/2015 22:40

I was and advised not to express for first 6 weeks as your supply is stabilising and you can over stimulate and cause engorgement. I used nipple shields with ds1 for a day, again not advised but gave me the respite I needed from the pain when I had undiagnosed thrush and poor latch which wasn't sorted until I saw a different midwife.

I had a tommee tippee pump which rubbed my nipples so got an avent one which I got on well with.

I was the opposite, Dh dudng care but my mum was dead against bfing and where I live almost no one does so I felt very isolated at times. No hcp pushed me and were actually quite surprised often when I went the clinic. Ds1 piled on weight so hey would open their mouths to tell me off and when I said was bfing they would say ok then that's fine!

Lucyandpoppy · 08/01/2015 22:41

daholster thanks I will try that now. It is honestly getting me quite down to think that I might not be able to bf, or that I will be risking her health if I do. Yes the NACC just says that most doctors do not reccomend bf'ing on infliximab. The gastro consultant I asked had no clue about pregnancy and infliximab and when I asked her about bf'ing she looked it up in a textbook and said that the book said something about the amounts of infliximab in breastmilk being probably too low to be harmful. So conflicting advise there really and no one seems to be able to give a straight answer, I suppose because there are relatively few people on infliximab, of those people few get pregnant, of those that get pregnant only a small number participate in breastfeeding studies. So any evidence is really very anecdotal.

cinnamongreyhound · 08/01/2015 22:43

We are going to run out of thread soon! Quick someone start a new one!!

PenguinPoser · 08/01/2015 22:44

Hoping to breast feed here too, although with very limited experience and not really knowing anyone else that has done it successfully, might have to join a support group or something. I agree with the health benefits for baby and it's meant to be really good for losing baby weight too! However -as long as I give it a good go would like to think I wouldn't beat myself up if it didn't work. Would also like to be able to express after the first few weeks - to let DH do some feeding and maybe give me a little freedom at times. But will see how it goes.

hiding I'm also hoping someone can shed light on how nipple shields work, I have some from a friend (unused) and can't imagine how they work in reality!

cinnamongreyhound · 08/01/2015 22:46

Must be a tough decision to make Lucyandpoppy! I cried with pain with ds1, couldn't hug Dh as my boobs were so sore but cried more every time he suggested buying formula as it was very important to me to bf. Luckily I had the choice and very soon got soneone who knew what they were doing, and not pretended to, to help me!

SquattingNeville · 08/01/2015 22:48

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StuntNun · 08/01/2015 22:51

Nipple shields are just silicone cones that go over your nipple. If you're sore then you can feed without pain. My DS1 wouldn't latch on but he fed fine with the nipple shields. Regular use can reduce your supply (I had to supplement with formula from four months) which is why they aren't recommended unless absolutely necessary.

cinnamongreyhound · 08/01/2015 22:52

Phew thanks SquattingNeville!

PenguinPoser, nipple shield just give a little protection so stop and rubbing that's happening but can actually stop baby latching properly long term. If latch is correct the sticky out but of the nipple should be near the back of the throat and so it doesn't get rubbed but in my case my breasts were so engorged ds1 didn't open his mouth wide enough for that to happen so my nipple was further forward in his mouth than it should have done and so got badly rubbed and was very sore very quickly.

daholster · 08/01/2015 22:52

hiding they recommend you don't express before 6 weeks because babies regulate how much milk your boobs need to make by feeding on demand. Expressing machines don't stimulate the nipple in the same way so aren't as good for establishing supply. It's not that you can't, but trying to express purely and not bf at all is almost impossible and will not establish your supply as well. But you can do a bit of both, just not too early. I had to try early because dd couldn't latch at first (stupid inverted nipples and she had a tongue tie). It was hard work. But once my supply was fine a few weeks in I could express off a bottle no problem - I was lucky though, my friend never could get much off.

Babies who seem hungry sometimes aren't getting the "hind milk" - fore milk comes at the start of the feed, flows faster and is watery and hydrating, when this is done their suck changes and is a bit more flickery as they stimulate your boobs to give out the nice fatty creamy hind milk Smile You can see the different types of milk appear when you express. My friend who seemed to feed all the time thinks in retrospect she didn't leave her dd on the same boob for long enough before switching or taking her off. Anyway, all that is for later...

I was told to use a nipple shield sparingly because it can alter their latch and actually cause more problems with latch longer term. You squeeze the air out of the teat with the shield inside out and every it over your nipple. They kind of slurp on. With the thrush it was so painful to do I never really learned how to do it properly, I thought it was all rather fiddly and gave in with them pretty quickly.

It sounds so complicated, but you get the hang of it, honest!

New thread? Again?!

StuntNun · 08/01/2015 22:52

Oh and I have breastfed for 33 months so far over three kids and only got thrush one time so it's not a foregone conclusion.

Hidingthefear · 08/01/2015 22:53

Wow a whole page appeared while I was typing.
Squatting I too have read a similar train of thought before and I do believe there to be some truth to it. I also think some types of mild pain can be mind over matter, and how you process ideas of pain can help with coping. No doubt most of that will go out of the windows when I actually feel a contraction, but I'll let you know post birth haha

Hopefully I can find a brebreastfeeding club of some description that might help as there's no one I know that I can talk to. Everyone I know with babies has formula fed from the start. I partly think it's an age thing and they think it's too hard and there seems to be either lack of support, lack of knowledge or conflicting stories and theories on how to do it. I'm young too so please don't think I'm slating young people. It's just my perception.

P.s started watching walking dead tonight with DH and now I can't sleep. (Yes I know I'm a late comer lol)

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