Pregnant and Coping with Mental Illness? Don't be afraid. :-) Come here for a cuppa.

[smokeandglitter]

Hello everyone,

Sorry if I've missed one but I couldn't find an antenatal 'club' thread for those with a Mental Illness who are pregnant and I thought it would be nice to start one for moral support, questions, hugs and a good old cup of (probably decaf, I'm afraid) tea.

Feel free to introduce yourselves.

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I suffer with Schizoaffective Disorder (Bipolar type - they think more co-existing Schizophrenia and Bipolar than strongly one or the other) and I still struggle with Anorexia Nervosa and OCD behaviours (think 'magical thinking' behaviours rather than cleanliness as such).

Currently 5+4 and estimated dd 19th March 2014. I have miscarried twice in the past but if this goes well then little one will be my first child. I'm excited but very nervous. DH and I got married last August and own two mad Ragdoll cats.

I have my first appointment with my CMHT Psyc tomorrow. I've already stopped Lamotrigine as advised (was on 400mg) but I'm still taking 800mg Quetiapine and 35mg Aripiprazole a day. Not sure if they'll lower dosages much as I can go very psychotic for long periods and risk to baby would be very high. I used to take Lithium and Risperidone, but came off them before my wedding mainly for safe conception.

and to anyone who wants to chat.

Just wondering if I have AND basically

Sorry for being mega slow. I was actually really nosy and impatient earlier so went over to the MH board and found your post. Thought I'd wait for you to reply here though before saying much.

I've just re-read your post, and so much of it is familiar to me. I too have wondered if I have AND. I have an anxiety disorder and after a year of CBT and trying other things, eventually went onto medication for it, which helped. However, when I became pregnant I discovered that the medication I was on, was considered the worst anti-depressant to be on during pregnancy. So I decided to try without meds for a while. Unfortunately four things happened at once. I had a huge change at work which I wasn't expecting and was gutted about, I had the hormones of pregnancy, came off medication, and had five weeks off work for summer holidays, so far too much time to think. The result was a complete meltdown. I actually felt like I had nothing to live for, which is really hard to admit, and I didn't admit it to anyone. I wasn't doing anything, was so unmotivated, and I couldn't do what I usually do when I'm down which is drink copious amounts of wine! My GP put me back on medication, but he spent ages looking into the safest one to take during pregnancy. He put me on a low dose of Amitriptyline and has gradually increased it to a dose which is really helping. I have to say, please see your GP and please don't be too averse to taking medication if you need it. I can't tell you how bad I felt before, and I can't tell you how much better I feel now. Things aren't perfect, but overall I feel like it's better for me, my husband and my baby for me to be on the medication. I'm rambling and probably not making much sense, it's actually making me quite emotional writing about this. But please don't feel like a failure. I don't know whether you have AND or not, I'm not sure how important the diagnosis is. But if you need help please ask for it. And don't worry too much about meds. The other thing that has happened as a result of me getting help from my GP and midwife is that I've been referred to a consultant at the hospital who specialises in mental health difficulties during pregnancy. I'm terrified of PND but this reassures me that I will be watched very closely and that the help will be there if I need it.

Good luck!

Thank you. My GP is supposed to be calling me today. If she doesn't then DH says I can crash his appointment with her - to talk about his anti depressant meds. Hah hah hah - the whole family is miserable. Fucking hilarious.

After spending all day yesterday crying I have woken up today feeling sick and heavy, almost numb. Like I'm one step away from crying again. Luckily DH has taken today off work (because I was supposed to be at a work thing which I have now bailed on) so I won't be on my own. Thank god.

I feel like that the morning after a really bad day too. Feeling anxious or depressed really is exhausting! I'm glad your husband is with you. Even though he can't actually do anything to help, I feel better when my husband is with me. Good luck at the doctors. I just think it's best to be quite open with the medical people because they can put the support in place that you might need.

She's referred me to IPPS... some kind of talk therapy for pregnant and postnatal women I think. She did offer meds, but I'm going to try TT first I think. Thank you for the support xx

Good luck with the therapy. I know a lot of people have success with it. I was the same and tried therapy before I would agree to meds. The therapy didn't help me but that's just me, I'm sure the research says it works for more people than it doesn't. I'm glad you are getting some help :-)

I'm a mess. Going back to work tomorrow and I'm so anxious about it. Sat here crying feeling completely hopeless about it all. Why does it all have to be so bloody hard?

for you coastergirl I hope your first day back goes well.

I had my reassurance scan yesterday - finally proof that I'm pregnant! All seems to be well so far. I have my official NHS one in three weeks.

I started CBT last week - was referred before I became pregnant, due to anxiety I was experiencing. I've had it twice before and didn't find it much help, (the second time it was actually pretty damaging), but I'm trying to tell myself that I've changed a lot since then, it's a different therapist, a different reason for therapy, maybe it will help.

I didn't go in. Just couldn't do it. Feel like a complete failure.

Hia , I'm 20, 22 + 3 with my first , having a little girl. Suffer with PTSD , depression and severe anxiety , have been struggling recently especially after separating with my partner of five years , have found myself completely isolated and don't know what to do.

Hi anna

Are your doctors/midwives aware of this? Mine have been great. Right from my booking-in appointment the midwife was really proactive with referring me to people to keep a close eye on me. I have my appointment with the consultant next week and really hoping they can do something to help. I've been off work for ages now and feel so isolated too. Hope we can help.

Great idea for a thread, thank you!

I'm 10 weeks today, I have C-PTSD and my DP has Bipolar 2. This will be my first child and my DP's third.

Doing ok mental health wise so far, I've been avoiding stressors and triggers quite successfully and I know that the longer I go without being triggered, the less vulnerable I am to triggering and the whole spiral of panic/not sleeping/being too tired and down to do anything/anxiety/panic.

More concerned about my DP's health, we don't live together yet and I'm wondering what the reality of dealing with each other all day every day long term will be like, especially since neither of us responds well to sleep deprivation.

Lovely to have some understanding company here!

Thankyou for replying :) They are aware I have community rehab team involved anyway as I was only discharged from hospital after 3 year august 2013 however have had no pregnancy specific or increased support everywhere seems understaffed and no time .

Hello Ladies,

Hope everyone is feeling ok. I've been struggling quite a lot, so much so that writing here seemed like too much effort. But tomorrow I have my appointment with the mental health consultant at the hospital. I was actually convinced it was on Wednesday but my phone popped up with a reminder today. I'm dreading it and looking forward to it in equal measure. I've printed this article out to take with me: psychcentral.com/lib/adult-aspergers-the-relief-of-a-diagnosis/0006706 Somebody sent me this ages ago. I've suspected for a long time that this is a huge contributor in me struggling with anxiety. The thing is, my belief that people don't like me isn't just paranoia, I almost wish it was. It's just fact. I've never known anyone that has as many fall-outs as I do, but it's not because I'm one of those people who loves to be controversial, I just can't interact with people without accidentally causing trouble for myself. I'm exhausted with trying, and exhausted with being so upset and anxious all the time. I've tried talking to doctors about this in the past but it's just awkward and embarrassing and they just think I'm being silly. But this article explains it better than I can, so I'm going to let that do the talking. Reading it again today set me off in floods of tears. Just hope that I'm not putting too much on this appointment. I'm desperate to get back to work and just want things to be better.

Sorry for the long ramble.

Hi everyone, how are you all doing? I'm now 12 weeks, and am feeling constantly sick- which feels very much like anxiety and I'm starting to get the two confused. I think feeling ill all the time is getting me down too- I'm also exhausted. I really hope I'm not about to have a blip...xx

Popping in. 14+6 here. Tiredness has got a bit better, but anxiety is still horrendous. I have an appointment with the antenatal mental health team on the the 18th Nov - not quite sure what to expect, but hoping that it will be helpful.

I've been lurking on mumsnet, not quite feeling able to participate - feel a bit like a failure before I've even begun, if that makes sense.

How is everyone else doing?

inthewoods hope you are feeling better. I agree that feeling sick feels the same as anxiety, it's partly why I hate anxiety so much. I'm not a very sicky person, I never throw up, and feeling sick with anxiety really bothers me. Hope you aren't having a blip and if you are, we are here for you.

JaneyTea sorry you're struggling with anxiety. My appointment with the antenatal mental health team was odd, good and bad in equal measure, I expected them to do a lot more than they did. I did get a referral from it though which I really needed. Good luck with your appointment.

As for me, I'm still struggling. I managed to get back to work and the first couple of days were horrendous. I came home in floods of tears after my first day, but arrived home to my referral letter which said I'd been assigned to the Asperger team, which sent me off in more tears, mostly from relief I think. I coped until the end of term and felt a little better, but I've just had a horrible weekend away. It started off so well as it was just me and my husband, and we enjoyed each other's company more than we have in ages. But then his friends joined us and I completely went into meltdown. I know I ruined the rest of the weekend for both of us, which I hate because it was his birthday this weekend. Was going to go off sick again today after feeling awful yesterday but managed to go in which has helped. Came home to a letter from the mental health centre with an appointment to see a Clinical Psychologist from the Asperger team on 17th November for an initial assessment, so it really helps to know that something is being done. Had my 20 week scan this morning, and it was reassuring to know that all is ok, despite my very lukewarm feelings about pregnancy so far. Starting to feel tiny movements from baby, which is nice.

Hope the quietness of this thread is indicative of good health for everyone!

Aw coastergirl , it sounds like you've had a lot going on recently. Fingers crossed that the assessment with the psychologist will bring something helpful. in the meantime.

My anxiety has been a bit better this week. Not sure why - maybe just being in second trimester, maybe because we've started telling people. We're visiting my family this weekend to tell them, eeek!

Hope everyone else is doing okay.

Hi ladies,

Bit nervous actually.

I am an anxiety & OCD lady.

Diagnosed many years ago with a panic disorder and the OCD (do this or 'x' will happen kind of OCD)

I lived with an abusive partner (now ex!) for many years before finally leaving him last year. I am now pregnant with DC3 (new amazing wonderful partner)

I went for my book in appointment and my previous mental health was brought up. I was advised I have to have a 'low risk mental health' assessment.

Apart from the odd random thing (like tinnitus which makes me worry lots, the whole 'what if I can never sleep again' kind of worry, and of course the usual ' Will I m/c' worry) I feel fine.

I am worrying now what this assessment means and how it will affect my pregnancy and what if they think I am not fit to be Mum?

I feel like I wish they never knew about it.

My partner knows about my previous issues.

It's kind of put a downer on things for me :(