November 1014 - thread 5 - the rainbow collective romping (and limping) into 2nd trimester!

[weeonion]

hi folks - thought we should have a new thread!

Oh Elliekins, you have my complete sympathy. How totally frustrating - I can quite understand you feeling murderous. A one off is not too bad, but a few weekends in a row where you miss out on doing stuff you want to do with your DP is not fun. It's not just about him kicking up his heels for the last few times, this time is also about you two enjoying your last few months together with just the two of you. Can you explain how you feel and suggest a few activities you want to do together for a bit of bonding pre-baby?

My turn for a bit of a grump My DP is also fond of a drink or two which normally I don't mind at all (I'm usually there with him), but it does get harder the longer I'm pregnant. Mostly I don't really mind about not drinking, but I do find Friday nights harder when I really fancy a nice big glass of wine at the end of the week. And I agree with whoever it was who said they were really noticing how drunk everybody gets. When we've been to the pub it has amazed me how much people change even after just a couple of drinks when you are stone cold sober. I love my friends dearly, but hearing the same thing for the third time in the space of 10 minutes can really start to get quite dull. I feel awful being grumpy about it - I know it isn't forever and I really wanted to be pregnant, but I think the tiredness and aches I get at the end of the day just mean that my tolerance levels drop dramatically and I can start to feel really hard done by. Let's face it, I'm not the only pregnant woman on the planet, and in the grand scheme of all things horrible just having to put up with a few pissed people is by no means the end of the world, but I do think we women get the tough end of the stick with this pregnancy lark and a bit of support from our other halfs can go a long way.

Is anyone else feeling absolutely terrified about the baby arriving and the changes it will bring? Sometimes I'm really excited and feel sure it will all be fine, but the last two days I have felt quite panicky about it all.

Oh, and twiglet the doppler arrived on Friday and we've had a play with it twice since and found the heartbeat both times. Fine for a cheapy I think but we have to lie close together with an earphone in each ear because it doesn't have a speaker. If that won't bother you then go for it. I was/am too stingy and strapped for cash to spend £40 odd on it so I bought the cheapest one on Amazon (AngelSounds) at £20 and it suits me fine.

Morning all. Just caught up on the thread. Good to hear everyone's doing OK although yes, I too am missing a nice cold glass of something, particularly when it was warm last week! I would like a Doppler but my DP thinks I will drive myself mad with it. Any thoughts?

Anyone having trouble sleeping? Had it until about week 8 but it seems to have come back with a vengeance. Waking in the early hours for a wee and then awake until 5 or 6 then dozing on and off until I get up. I usually sleep on my L side anyway as I have a scoliosis so my R hip is painful, but I seem to be getting the same pains on L side now. All surrounded by various pillows but can't seem to find a good position. In the last few days my period like low back pain is back - I had this loads in early pregnancy but thought it had settled. It worries me that it's back at 14 + 5 whilst the rest of my symptoms are improving. Hoping it's just stretching...

Sorry - that's a very moany post. Tiredness clearly does not suit.

Oh and Thisis I keep worrying about at. Having worked for the last 12 years as a teacher I am worried about being at home with a baby all day. We haven't told anyone yet so I haven't got everyone else getting excited either.

Ha ha FTMK, don't worry about moaning, I think we are all in need of a bit of a grump at the moment! I had quite bad period pains last week at 14+2/3/4 and then my bump seemed to grow a bit so I think it was a growth spurt for the baby. It's settled down again now.

The last couple of nights I've started to get very uncomfortable in my pelvic area (despite a pillow between my legs) which has disturbed my sleep and my ribs are hurting constantly which makes me somewhat grumpy

Oh my god this constant weeing is driving me batty. It was the exact same last time around and for me both times it's started in the 2nd trimester, not first. I think it must be because the baby is still so low down and pressing right on my bladder?

I was up about 5 times last night for the loo. I feel like I always need to go. DP was asking me if maybe I have a UTI but no, I don't think so, it's just regular old pregnancy!

Elliekins that is pretty annoying, it's irritating to see the weekend wasted away like that when you want to do stuff together.

AnnaRose, hope you're feeling a lot better now about feeding and general baby care! Your DH is spot-on that it's not just your problem. I'm wondering if there is some kind of family fund for your relative's care, so that you could hire somebody to have with YOU - i.e. caring for YOU! - for a few hours a day while your baby is still young - even a home help type of person or a young person? You would more than deserve it because to be going back to 'work' a week after you give birth is really quite a big ask (I know you don't mind: you sound amazing!).
I'm just thinking that another pair of hands to make you lunch and hold the baby while you do lifting etc. would be invaluable. If not, I know you said that a wrap sling wouldn't suit because you'd be lifting and cleaning your relative etc, but maybe the baby could go in it for the hour or so between those jobs. IME, they squall so much less when they're in a sling, although some babies are just really placid and happy to be anywhere!

I've been feeling a bit low recently so have been dragging myself off the couch at night once dd's in bed and I've had my dinner and going for a nice walk while listening to my audiobook. Need to get some fresh air and exercise while the nights are so long and bright. I feel the better for it already.

FTMK, I was thinking of getting a doppler after being told my Papp-a was low. My DP also advised me not to do it, because I would just get obsessed. I think he's right though. Plus, I don't even know where my placenta is at the moment, so there is a chance it's at the front and then the doppler might not even work, which would cause a lot of stress.

I am thinking about getting a blood pressure monitor though. I may have a higher chance of getting high blood pressure with low Papp-a and that has freaked me out completely. I am so scared of getting pre-eclampsia and have been very anxious this past week. I am having palpitations, which I know can be common, but it is probably made worse by my anxiety. So I thought being able to keep an eye on my blood pressure might help somehow.

Hi Blamber

I would recommend the Omron M2 monitor. It's a very basic model with no fancy features, but it works and gives a clear reading so what more do you want. Asda sometimes have them for £10, but you have to hunt. If not, the Co-Op pharmacy is the next cheapest place if you have one near you. I have one myself currently as I record my BP twice a day so I have a record for my doctor and Consultant as I'm on BP meds.

www.co-operativepharmacy.co.uk/Omron-M2-Basic-Upper-Arm-Blood-Pressure-Monitor/id-3535101

Ellie I sympathise, If my dp gets drunk he is also useless the next day and I go mad trying to do things :p

I am also weeing all night grrrrrrr! What can we do?

It is SO annoying! Although I was reading various other talk threads last night after my stroppy rant and I have got so much to be grateful for that I truly humbled - there was one mum who's hubby has been diagnosed with incurable cancer this week and she's 7 months pregnant, another woman trying to conceive for a long time and getting her period again and dispairing, someone else 38 weeks pregnant and then discovering her partner is spending money on drugs ... all sorts of sadness, I was in floods of tears!
A lazy grump with a hangover and me not having much 'fun' really isn't such a big problem in context.

Although the wee-ing IS out of control. 16 wees yesterday between 6am and lunchtime and I had only drank a cup of tea and a smoothie - it's not even physically possible.

It's worse when he unexpectedly goes out for a drink when I've planned a day of house stuff!!! Grr men!

It's all relative.

My DH has spent the entire weekend building a table for the BBQ with his brother and totally ignoring me. I understand that in the grand scheme of things it could be a lot worse but I'm still pretty pissed off.

Just cause someone else has it worse doesn't make you any less annoyed about the bad in your life.

Thanks brandsnob

Very true Oklahoma, very true.
He is still muttering about feeling hungover, he went to the pub at noon on SATURDAY. Muppet.
However, he has just said "come on then, what are we doing?" so I'm thinking of a trip to Homebase as punishment, or, oooh yes, Mothercare.
That's what we are doing today, we are going to look at prams that we can't afford and he will realise he can no long afford to spend 12 hours boozing.
I'm feeling quite gleeful now.

LOL Elliekins! Have lots of fun

greenstone I strongly suspect DH is going to move heaven and earth to be with me a LOT. He kinda makes his own hours a bit. He's lovely.

I had a bit of a palaver this morning - had to go into the EPU. I was at work (nursing) and started having very sharp abdo pain. So since the EPU was just upstairs, up I went. Upshot was its probably just bad ligament pain, but I was sent home. Took 2 Paracetamol and DH was here and he made me lunch and put me to bed and made me a hot water bottle and is just the most comforting person on earth. So am very, very grateful for my lot. Pain is continuing so am glad I came home - the paracetamol took the edge off but didn't clear it.

The consolation of all the drama is that I had a scan! Its my first, as my hospital does them at 20 weeks. So I saw it bouncing around like mad! And the measurements are all spot on, and my fluid is fine, and there's a nasal bone and four chambers in the heart, and two kidneys.....they even printed off pics! (Maybe cos I'm staff....) It was like a Romanian gymnast in there!

I also found out I have an anterior placenta which, tbh, was no suprise as I've had no sensations yet. So now I know not to worry about movements for a while, which is good to know.

Feel a bit mushy towards baby for the first time. It wasn't particularly real before. More like a story I was telling people.

So sorry to hear you had a bit of a scare but otherwise what a lovely post AnnaRose :) Your DH sounds like a darling and happy happy news about the scan! (Are you in Ireland too by any chance?)

Rest up well now.

I'm glad you had a good scan Anna :)

Im not still not sure If I'm occasionally feeling movement or if it'd wind. It doesn't help that when I lie down I can feel by pulse in my lower belly so I can't tell if I can feel wriggling as well. I'm 16 + 4, has anyone felt things at this point as a first time mum and if not when did you?

Scan sounds lovely AnnaRose as does your DH . I hope the pain eases up soon

Alita - I have the pulse in the belly thing too. I am 17 weeks (closer to 16 in my view as they moved my dates) and not really feeling much movement. I am sure with DC2 I was feeling things at 15 weeks. Not concerned for now as heard a nice loud heartbeat last Monday at MW appointment. Never bought a Doppler with the other two, and now toying with the idea. It seems a bit daft to start getting anxious/spending ££ with DC3

Just returned from an emergency trip to M&S for bigger bras. I was getting a headache waiting to try the new ones on such was the tightness of my old favourite one. It was so bad that I decided to go without a bra whilst I queued up to pay. I am epically flat chested normally, so even now at whopping 36C braless with a jacket over the top wasn't too hideous a sight. However, I didn't feel that I was looking too hot in the changing room mirrors though. Really a 17 week pg woman does not need a 360 degree view of herself.

Anna, I'm sorry for the scare but it's great you gt your first scan. Can't believe they won't do it before then! It definitely makes it feel more real.

alita I'm 16+4 and have felt movements since middle of last week even though I have an anterior placenta. I can't feel anything when I lay down though, only when I'm sat up, especially if I'm hunching/leaning over. It feels like when I get a twitch in my eye. Its still very faint but I've felt it every day because I'm looking for it :)

Oh I can't wait to feel movements! I keep trying to feel anything, but so far no luck. Not even 15 weeks yet though, so staying patient.

hey found you again i got lost
glad to see everyone doing well and scares coming out as just a positive scan
17 weeks today midwife tomorrow.
im still bleeding slightly with this heamatmia past 3/4 days bad stretchy pains and ouchies!!! my pelivs and back feel like gladiators are pulling them apart! clicking when i walk sound like a clock. good news bump is huge!!! and people notice yay!! walking round in tight tops pushing bump out yay

Glad you're ok anna Hope you're not in too much pain mismy

Feeling really sorry for myself. 16+1 today. Still feeling sick 90% of the time. Feel sick if I eat or if I don't. Feeling sick if I lay down or sit up, nothing is helping :-( Just back from visiting my parents for the weekend and wasn't much use. They were happy spending time with DD so I could dose and curl up in the corner! Had to drive most of the 150 miles back as I was nearly sick as the passenger in the car. Had a big crying fit as DH is trying to make everything lighthearted and joke to make me feel better but it's just not funny now (said the crying pregnant women in the car) I just want to feel ok. Hope it goes away soon, don't remember feeling this sick for this long last time :-( At least it's half term this week and I can take things slowly.
Bad heartburn too, off to drink some milk :-(

Just catching up with this from the last couple of days. Another one who is definitely starting to miss the alcohol, especially now that the sickness has passed and the weather has warmed up. Was at a family bbq yesterday and everyone was drinking apart from me

Luckily, have managed to avoid any heavy nights out with drunken people so far, but can imagine that's not fun.

Annarose fab news that you got to see your baby- must be so hard being expected to wait until 20 weeks!

ThisIs I frequently keep getting worried about how life is going to change after the baby and with work, etc. I guess it's completely natural.

Am 16+4 today and got my 16week midwife appointment tomorrow but dreading it, as am on nights tonight (and had hardly any sleep last night so already tired) and then got to stay up until after 11 for the appointment, so going to be shattered. Was proving to be too difficult to change it though, so just going to have to deal with it.