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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

October 2014 - Thread 3... More morning sickness and tired mummy's!

995 replies

BlueberryPoppy123 · 07/03/2014 16:08

We're going through these fast! Thought seen as we were filling up the last thread fast I'd attempt a new thread, not sure how to copy our due date list over though... Could someone else do that?

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9
sazzlehopes · 15/03/2014 15:31

Fatpony it is done as a given unless you opt out of not knowing as some do.

CODwidow · 15/03/2014 17:06

Hi can I join, im due 1/10 with dc 6. Not a planned pregnancy as fell whilst on the depo but after a few difficult days I think we've come round to the idea. My dcs are 11,9,7,5 and 15 months. I had a scan on wed as I had no idea of dates and had a little bleeding but all looks ok.

Mrsthedog · 15/03/2014 17:36

Welcome CODwidow! How goes your pregnancy so far?

CODwidow · 15/03/2014 17:50

Tbh I've had some sickness which I put down to a stomach bug,tiredness which I thought was because I work nights and just a huge appetite! Cannot believe I didn't click sooner

binkybunny · 15/03/2014 18:10

For the Nuchal test I had to sign part of my pregnancy notes to say I'm opting out along with the downs test. It was all done as part of the booking in appointment and the midwife checked we had read the information given by the doctors at my first appointment.

Kirstipops · 15/03/2014 18:14

Hi CODwidow! You'll be a busy mama, congratulations on your new wee bun in the oven :)

CODwidow · 15/03/2014 18:41

I will be, although I find the older 4 tend to amuse themselves/each other a lot and quite often dc5 is involved. I'm still in shock really as completely unexpected.

CODwidow · 15/03/2014 18:51

I will be, although I find the older 4 tend to amuse themselves/each other a lot and quite often dc5 is involved. I'm still in shock really as completely unexpected.

Kirstipops · 15/03/2014 19:03

I'm not sure if it's possible to not be shocked, no matter how well planned a baby is! I've had 6 weeks to get my head around it as my periods are usually like clockwork so I knew from early on that was something was amiss. There was I stressing about being responsible enough for our new kitten last summer too ;)

mum2kiss · 15/03/2014 19:03

cod my sis is also expecting dc6 with same ages as yours! I wondered if you might be her for a second but different due dates!!

I had to take paracetamol earlier and that seemed to help the pain ease off a bit temporarily. After a couple of hours it wore off...im thinking about taking it twice a day until my referral (the doc said it was ok to take it).

I will give them a call on monday and see if there is anyway I can be seen asap. I only got referred on wednesday though so the hospital may not have even received it yet...

CareBearWithFangs · 15/03/2014 19:05

Welcome cod :)

I just found out someone I work with is also pregnant and due in October, we spent all this morning at work talking about pregnancy/baby things which was quite nice Smile

Has anyone got any plans for tomorrow? Feel like we should treat DD to a nice day out because I've been so rubbish lately but don't have many ideas.

ohthegoats · 15/03/2014 19:37

I need a bit of advice. If everything is alright next week, I want to tell my best friend that I'm pregnant (I'll tell her if it's bad news too, but at least that won't provoke the same reaction.)

She's 41, single and has been desperate for children for a long time. She's also desperate for a man, and keeps doing silly things like hooking up with 25 year olds, falling in love, and then wondering why it doesn't work/they don't want to jump into babies with her immediately. Recently she's been a bit better, a bit more positive about life in general, not being obsessed with horoscopes, not shagging randoms, not crying down the phone etc.. but this afternoon, oh dear... it's all bad again, in her words she has 'the permanent rage'.

She's going to be really upset when I tell her. She's already upset that I have a longish term relationship, I can barely mention my boyfriend around her, and when other friends have gotten engaged or pregnant, she has a mini meltdown (sometimes a bit of a major meltdown - once she jacked in a job and went travelling for 6 months after someone had twins).

How should I do it? Sooner, or later? I've never been in a position where I've been desperate for a man or babies, I never thought I'd have either, and was perfectly happy with that life-plan. Any news of babies from my friends just made me think 'oh no, need to find a replacement for 6 months until they emerge from babyland', rather than 'OH MY GOD MY LIFE IS OVER, I'LL BE SINGLE FOREVER.. ' About 6 months ago she was saying things like 'I've been wondering what the point of my life is, if I don't breed, then what's the point.. I may as well be dead', so it's not me just being precious.

MrsDinoRawr · 15/03/2014 19:49

so sad to see there has been bad news on here recently. hope people are getting lots of support.

I am 10 weeks and struggling to do my clothes up. Wish I had a bump rather than just looking fat though. I went to get measured for a new bra as I know you are not supposed to wear underwired bras. Mine has been digging in and leaving marks. It appears than in 10 weeks i have gone from a 36DD to a 40F... and the women recommended getting a 40G as she said I have lots of time for them to carry on growing.... oh dear. It is so comfortable though.

MrsDinoRawr · 15/03/2014 19:51

ohthegoats it sounds like no time will be a good time but i would tell her before you start showing. hope it goes ok.

ohthegoats · 15/03/2014 19:53

Do I tell her in person? Or just send an email and let her rage without me seeing it?

Mrsthedog · 15/03/2014 20:07

Ohthegoats I would tell her in person and assume that she will be genuinely happy for you.

She might be upset and bitter in private, but she will want to do 'the right thing' by cooing and bleating at the idea of a bublet in the first instance.

You never know, she might surprise you and be really pleased. She might decide that she can live vicariously and be a really good aunty to the sproglet.

In short, don't waste time anticipating other people's reactions. Just spread the joy of you having a baby because it is brilliant.

Kirstipops · 15/03/2014 20:12

Jeezoh ohthegoats, that sounds really awkward. If she's your best friend though I would hope that she'd react differently in comparison to when other folks were pregnant, and she'd be happy for you? :-/ Maybe an email a couple of days prior to a meet-up might be a good idea, then she has time to collect herself a wee bit if she IS going to feel all crestfallen about it, and put on her best brave happy-for-you face when she actually meets you.

ohthegoats · 15/03/2014 20:20

She was meant to be staying with me this weekend, but cancelled - something to do with astrology (genuinely... erk). If she'd come, I'd have told her - she'd have been the first to know, before any parents etc, and hopefully that would have made her sort of pleased. Thing is, I'll see in her face in the split second before she smiles, how she really feels, and that will probably not be a good thing.

If she'd been here this weekend, I'd have told her as she left - just to demonstrate that despite being pregnant, we can have a normal weekend/time together going out cycling etc, instead of when she first arrives and it getting mentioned probably more than once.

At the moment we can't even work out how/when to tell parents though.

CODwidow · 15/03/2014 20:54

Oh wow mum2kiss really. Strangely I find that really reassuring.

FlipFantasia · 15/03/2014 20:57

Ohthegoats god, I'm not sure what I'd do if I had a friend like that. On the one hand, your baby/boyfriend/life is not her baby/boyfriend/life (ie by having a baby or a relationship you are not preventing her from having those things). This was something I thought about a lot when trying and failing to conceive dc1 naturally, when it seemed like everyone I'd ever met was having babies (seriously, I counted 43 pregnancies/babies in the time it took us to have him!). I would always try to be happy for others (even when I'd have to go off and have a private cry afterwards) as their baby was not 'my baby'.

On the other hand, your are sensitive to her and want her to be happy, both for you and for herself.

I'd be tempted to tell her straight up as soon as you see her. Pretending to not be pregnant so she can see you as 'normal' and then telling her right at the end could hurt her. Also, you are pregnant. And this time next year you will have a baby. And the year after that you will have a toddler etc. If she wants to stay close to you she needs to deal with this. You adjusting your reality to out her emotional needs isn't a long term solution...

As an aside, one of my oldest friends became a single mother by choice last year (I am godmother to her gorgeous girl!). She married young, mid twenties, first of my friends to do so. But they split up after eight years (a messy split). She had another relationship but he dicked her around. She then decided she wanted a baby more than she wanted a man and had IVF with donor sperm in Cyprus. She was 35, turned 36 right after her daughter was born. Some friends told her she was too young, that she's meet mr right etc but she decided a child (and possibly another) was her priority. I admire her guts and she is loving motherhood and is more than happy she made that choice!

Ok, ramble over!

FlipFantasia · 15/03/2014 20:59

Welcome COD. I'm one of 6 - with 9 years age gap from the eldest to the youngest! - and loved it! If I could convince DH I'd love 6! But I reckon we'll stop at 3...

CODwidow · 15/03/2014 21:10

I think for me its dealing with peoples reactions as although people who know me and my family, know that my dcs are happy etc some people are very judgemental and however I try not to listen, it can be really difficult.

FlipFantasia · 15/03/2014 21:21

COD I was just back in ireland visiting my mum and family and she mentioned how she'd felt judged as well, dreading telling people when she was pregnant (and this was the 70s, when there were plenty of people around with more kids!). She used to keep quiet as long as possible. But as she put it, her kids all thrived and she wouldn't have changed a thing (even with my dad dying when I was 8) and she's now loving being a granny (this baby will be grandchild no 15 for her).

TroubleAndFyfe · 15/03/2014 21:23

Hmm Mum2kiss sorry you're having such a bad time of it! Physio referrals tend to take a really long time (sorry to say) usually at least a month. Do ask your GP to chase it as it can't hurt. If you can afford it I would recommend you have an acupuncture session for pain relief, it's awesome - I got 2/3 days pain free after each session - bliss! Are you moving around very carefully (especially with the stairs)? Also, is there an aqua natal class near you? Sorry if I sound like a broken record; I really do know what you're going through and it's so, so hard. Thanks

pebble82 · 15/03/2014 21:23

COD people will always find something to be judgemental about. If it wasn't number of children it would be something else. For me it's that I'm not married/choosing children over my career/not in a big enough house etc. Sod them all!