October 2013: Newborn snuggles and waddles to the finish line

[FeministInTraining]

Stats sheet here

New arrivals here

Key:
SC - still cooking (pre EDD)
SFW - still f*ing waiting (post EDD)
OWT - on way to theatre (CS)
IP - induction in progress
SWIL - somewhere in labour
LIT - lost in transition

hugs to those sfw

congrats to all new mummies!

tarlia what a story... so glad it all ended OK but it must have been so scary. for you.

My MIL called again earlier and woke me up when I finally managed to fall asleep and have a nap to make up for my sleepless night... she called me all excited because "today is the day!". Yes... I know today is the day... I was very stroppy and asked her not to call every day because I find it stressful... I wasn't rude but I'm a bit beyond being polite now...

also, a question to ladies who had BP problems - it seems that mine really jumped up over the last few days (need to go back to see the doctor after yesterday's mw check up) - is it normal that high BP makes you feel really exhausted. I literally can't drag myself off the bed... can't do anything in the house. So unlike me... I've never had high BP in my life so don't really know how it feels.. is it likely to be causing this level of exhaustion? it's like someone flicked a switch last Friday...

Just managed to type out the Bootie pattern and attacch it to the FB page if anyone is interested x

Just a quick post for the struggling BF's......

H is now 15 days old and the nipple pain is finally settling, left side is completely pain free (!) and right side feeling sore first 5 sucks then ok!

Day 3-13 was agony, so I worked on latch (which still isn't perfect, but think nipples have hardened), lots of lansinoh, fresh breast pads every feed, jelonet to help cracks heal. Was in tears numerous feeds. But now really nice to enjoy feeding.

Just wanted to give you hope!

Thanks pink, ready and don't panic and anyone I missed. (On my phone in a busy recovery ward). I just want everyone to know that whether people comment or not your posts are really helpful.

Good luck to all those SW and I'm thinking of all those who are having tough times.

Clapham - I was very tired/a bit zombified and felt like I couldn't see straight (vision blurred at sides) however I'm sure 40 weeks pregnant also makes you pretty exhausted? Did you say you had protein in urine too?

yes pseudo, +1 and they sent it off for testing. no vision problems so far though. and no headaches. the only other thing is terrible nausea. also normal?

Nausea can be a sign of PE, but again all your organs are sooo squished now perhaps your poor stomach has had enough! It's good they sent your urine, and good that they are keeping an eye on you. What was your BP?

Although I should stress that if you feel uneasy about any symptom please please do go and get checked. Don't wait. Tarlia's story shows what high BP can do, and I know that my doctor was on standby with magnesium before/during my section as my BP was so high!

to neenie and rachel for that positive news - the breast shells have helped I think and I had some better advice today from the lady who did the NCT class we had on bf. I am determined not to give up. The last few feeds have been a little less painful and they have also been quicker which has helped.

thanks pseudo! I'm going back later today so will mention all the symptoms. my BP was 140/90 so nothing as bad as what you and tarlia had but a big jump for me in 10 days, from 110/70 which was always my normal reading. x

Just had a big long chat with my sister. been coming to terms the last few days with how I've been feeling since becoming a mum. I wanted this so badly and have the most wonderful little boy, but those first few weeks were harder than I ever thought they would be. if I'm honest I didn't really want him when he arrived. I regretted it. he also didn't really feel like he was mine. I think that's why I gave up bf so quickly. I know I could have tried harder but I hated the thought of him relying on me. I wanted dp to be able to take him away. i regret giving up so readily but I couldn't cope at the time at all, when im usually pretty resilient. things have definitely improved the last few days and I find myself falling more in love with him every day and I'm starting to actually enjoy being his mum.
I wanted to share this as it took me so much by surprise. I thought I would love it all right from the start. I don't think its full on pnd as I'm feeling better but it's definitely affected my mental health more than I thought it would.

Just popping in to update - haven't had chance to catch up.

I think I'm technically SWIL ... I came in at midday to be induced following yesterday's failed sweep. Went on a monitor then was examined. MW says she can't understand what dr was doing yesterday as I'm 4cm dilated and once a room is free they'll break my waters to kick start contractions (baby won't engage properly due to level of fluid). Eek!

Hoping to have an announcement later today!

Thinking of you Sanji - hope your induction is smooth.

roofio that's a very brave post, thank you. I have to say there have been times last night when I thought to myself "what have I done?!".

roofio you have expressed very similar feelings to those that I had. The first few weeks are miles apart from what I was expecting. I didn't realise how much a baby would depend on me, or how long/often I would need to be feeding or nappy changing. I also didn't think for one minute that the baby wouldn't sleep in her cot! I assumed that was standard and she would lie down in there without issue. Then there's the fear that something is going to happen to them when you aren't watching them continuously, I didn't expect that! I also didn't know anything about cluster feeding or that second night when your baby is hungry but you're milk hasn't yet come through. It was all a lot more mentally and physically difficult than I was expecting. Now that I am past that though I am totally in love, and I know that there will be more cluster feeding nights and stressful times, but at least I have had an opportunity to bond with my gorgeous baby now and I am more mentally prepared for those nights. I still wish I could get her to sleep in her cot though!

Glad it's not just me dontworry! pinkforboys I can never tell when she's going to do it! I almost think that she may not be latching effectively on that side. I never have problems with the other side.

Good luck to all SWIL and dilating thoughts to those SFW
We've had tears this morning from me over bf I really want to do it for my gorgeous boy but the time it takes is something I don't know if I have as ds1 is so full on. Even with DH here things are a struggle so I doubt I'll be able to manage when he goes back to work. Also very emotional as this is day 4 of little B's existence and not one of my friends has sent a card and that made me cry- I know I'm ridiculous! It's just that when ds was born the house was instantly full of flowers and cards and gifts and this little boy is just as special and I feel like no one cares about him and I just want to give him so much but I can't because of ds1 needing me too and it just all got a bit much this morning. Can't wait for these hormones to settle down so I can stop being a crazy woman!!!

Argh. I've posted twice today. And now looking back realised neither posted!

Summary as can't stay long

Shooting. I've also had fewer cards and flowers. Even texts! Have joked about it a few times. However trying to get over it as DS1 is only 1yr old.
I also had same fear about looking after ds1. I found thinking of practical ideas helped me. A play pen for keeping ds1 safe when I need to go loo (or do something). A sling for when lo just won't be put down.

Roofio. Very brave for you to share. But many ppl feel like this. Just don't admit it.

Thanks to pink for mentioning multi mam.

Hugs and for all

checking in.

Roofio I have felt the exact same many time I have deeper ingrained anxiety problems which pushes me further towards pnd but what you feel felt is extremely common, glad its getting easier xxx

Clapham keep on at them it sound the same as me your normal bp was mine too not to scare you but they said my placenta most likely was failing due to it, I was however getting headaches a very blurry vision too it was not PE but it was not fun keep on top of the Doctors xxx

oh and shooting we have had the same less card and gifts even mother in law bought DS our first a big pram and this time "well its your second so you wont be getting anything like that" its a bit sad :(

We've had hardly any cards either, and only my best friends have wanted to come over and meet dd :(

pink I had placental abruption. That's an epic cluster feed, but I guess she is coaxing your milk to come in. I hope you got to nap today and tonight's better.

badger I did not know that sudden good Bp is a sign, so that's incredibly interesting.

clapham lack of sleep can affect the Bp and make it rise- had you slept well? Did they get you to rest for 20 mins and take it again? I was exhausted, to the extent they thought I could have iron deficiency or thiroid issues but came back fine. I was also vomiting but I think that was to do with my reflux. A persistent Bp over 90 would be classed as PE with protein. often when you only have +1 it's a bad (not mid stream/clean enough) catch, which I'm sure the Dr explained, so they are testing for a white blood cells/UTI/discharge. When are you back at the Dr/MW? Any other symptoms. Sorry, I wish I'd not told my story now, but please don't worry as it is very rare even with PE.

shooting I was looking and thinking only an hour ago about the lack of cards this time. Looks like its normal after #1 :(

Evening everyone. I'd just like to say a big thank you to everyone for sharing their experience both good, bad and tricky so openly. I feel although being at the back of the bus can be frustrating, the advantage is hearing so many things that I've never heard about. I didn't do nct classes and from being here I think I've learnt more than I would have at any class. So from bf difficulties to nappy changing disasters I do really think that because of this thread I am as ready as I'll ever be! thank you and hugs to you all.
Shooting big hugs to you, people can be pretty thoughtless and self absorbed. Xx
Clapham hope the doc visit went ok and that you're feeling ok.
Hope all those being induced are coming along well. Xx

Hi just checking in

Have been reading but sorry difficult to post.

tarlia thank you for sharing birth story. It must have been very traumatic for you. Esp the fact that you were alone. Glad there was such a fast response and you and your little boy are both safe! Can't believe they left you on own afterwards though!! It will be good to go over things with your midwife. You're very brave xx

clapham sorry you're SFW as of today. Hope you're doing ok despite that and trying to do something nice for yourself every day!

Congrats karma, kid, write! feminist and apologies to anyone I've missed.

Good luck anything and sanji to roofio, rox! mrshn,

falcon how are things now?

mon how is Eliana getting on now you're home?

I've had a couple of crap nights. Although I guess all nights since home have been less than ideal but maybe catching up with me now. M won't go in cot at night so has been sleeping on me. Last night I was wrecked she would not settle at all, feed, wind,poo cycle til 2am. I fell asleep with her in my arms. My dh woke me up as she was on bed beside him. I was soo scared and felt terrible. Now don't know what going to do tonight. ... Anyone with advice please. Other than surviving on about 3 hrs sleep a night feel ok. We have some financial issues at the moment but that's external ongoing stress (trying to sell house in Ireland as mortgage too much of a stretch at the minute and rent not covering it all). BF going well, for now. She has put on almost 1kg since born (4th oct). Jaundice practically gone. Bum still red though, using bepanthen now.

Thinking of everyone with sore cracked nipples and latch trouble. Like previous posters have said think about contacting lactation consultant. Also lansinoh and kellymom have been lifesavers for me.

Ok I have to go now, nappy change to do.

As others have said thanks so much for support. Esp so many of you who have been through such difficult pregnancies, labours and early days.

Sorry for typos. Blame ipad

Well, I am now at the hospital but not quite IP yet. They have decided to skip the gel/pessary stage and break my waters. However, there is 'no room at the inn' in the delivery unit at the mo, and I am second in the queue, which doesn't count someone turning up in labour. So might not start for a while yet. They then give me 4 h to go into labour naturally, then it's onto the drip if things haven't kicked off.

Totally agree with ready's sentiments about the thread, I struggled with BF and gave up last time whereas all the people I know IRL seemingly had no issues at all. It's been very reassuring to me to hear about how hard others are finding it, and to learn from those who have struggled but overcome the issues.