October 2013: Newborn snuggles and waddles to the finish line

[FeministInTraining]

Stats sheet here

New arrivals here

Key:
SC - still cooking (pre EDD)
SFW - still f*ing waiting (post EDD)
OWT - on way to theatre (CS)
IP - induction in progress
SWIL - somewhere in labour
LIT - lost in transition

Poor C has hiccoughs - nothing to worry about but he's clearly a little alarmed by them :)

Thanks everyone so much it really helps being able to ask advice without being judged and getting sensible answers.

Pseudo I thought about tongue tie I'm going to ask the midwife tomorrow, she used to be on of the b feeding counsellors here at Liverpool women's hospital so a good person to ask.

Nipple shields are going to be bought first thing tomorrow morning.

Nat I say go for lunch if you want too. It would be nice for you to celebrate your anniversary.

Dp has been remarkably good in the last 24 hours, I think staying over night with me has made him see first hand that this is hard going.

I've been feeling a bit anxious myself, I simply cannot switch off at night and sleep when she does I worry over every noise she makes and get frightend unless I'm watching her she's going to go under her blankets and end up suffocating. I'm not sleeping because of this fear I have. I worry about just leaving her in her crib, I feel like I should be constantly holding her talking to her, otherwise she will think I don't love her and neglecting her! Goodness I sound like a right fool hey!

Ffs clapham stop breathing will you?!

Sorry,I know it's old hat now but it made me snigger aloud. I am catching up,only on page 14 & struggling to read with my eyes drooping but I am determined.

My baby girl is back with us,she is fine. Nothing wrong with her at all except she hasn't fed last night or much today but I will update you all once I have finished reading. I just wanted to thank you all for your support & concern for us. It means a lot to me & I appreciate it all. Back soon!

Flyer I'm using this to stop me staying awake checking T is ok - it's brilliant (and you can just have the movement monitor on while they are in your room)

Flyer I also like medala ones. Tommee tippe ok to. But I think if sending dp get any you can get your hands on then decide which you prefer after.

Hello ladies, sorry I haven't posted for so long - been trying to keep up but failing miserably. Managing to read the odd post every couple of pages or do.

Congratulations to all those with new arrivals (too many to name-check) I really hope everyone is making good post-birth recoveries and all the babies are thriving.

My new little DS is absolutely scrummy and such a contented wee thing. Such a contrast to his feisty big sister! She had an opinion on everything from the second she entered the word, whereas as long as he's fed he's happy.

The emotional stuff I worried about (feeling differently towards DD or not bonding with baby) hasn't been an issue at all (so far) and I can honestly say I'd be on cloud 9 if it wasn't for the breast-feeding problems.

I am finding it absolutely excruciating - my nipples are a mess and I'm constantly on the brink of engorgement as I have a ridiculous over supply of milk,

I have been to the baby cafe, had DS's Tongue tie snipped, rung my NCT breastfeeding course leader, had numerous midwives watch me feed, and I'm going back into hospital to see the infant feeding team tomorrow.....but we just can't get the bloody latch right!!!

I'm constantly watching the clock and dreading the next feed..just don't know what to do...I've spent 6 years feeling guilty for not breastfeeding DD longer than 6 days, but I feel so sore and hate the fact DS's early days are being spoilt by the pain.

Sorry for the me, me, me post. I know others are having feeding troubles too, but I just needed to off load...

Just been reading the nipple shield posts - I'm not finding them that great but maybe it's because I've got boots own and they do seem v flimsy (like someone said)

Thank you all so much for the support ladies, it means a lot to me. Especially you, apperley, for sharing your experience from going from 1 to 2, and making me feel a bit more normal. I also almost didn't share, but knew that at least someone might have a similar experience. We are so lucky to have such a lovely bus. text sounds like we are having a similar time of it.
I made extra effort to make a huge fuss of DS1 this afternoon by doing crafts and then getting them both under the baby gym for the first time - all the while being as positive and not nagging. It was exhausting, but I think we all felt better for it.

flyer I was like that with DS1. Def mention these feelings to your MW when she visits at home if you still feel that way in your own home. Exhaustion will set in though and you will sleep. As for going under the blankets - have you considered using grobags? A baby sleeping bag, so no way she can 'go under'. I think she was a 9lber!? So is big enough as min weight is 8lb8oz.

Ps we are using the grobag for the first time with this guy tonight. He hates the swaddle over his arms anyway so I'm sick of wrapping him. Who knows, he may miss the tightness of the body wrap as it helps wind apparently. Wish me luck!

Bridget - it sounds like you're getting support from all the right places. It's easy to forget that breast feeding is a skill you both need to get to grips with! Good luck tomorrow.

Flyer - I think the anxiety is completely normal. I remember watching DS sleep and being scared of not watching him. I'm not sure you ever quite lose it to be honest, but it does get easier!

Nat - go out for your anniversary. It's one of the perks if bottle feeding, and it's a lovely opportunity to catchup with DH and get some perspective. Just don't spend it all talking about the kids!

I'm now 40+4 and heading to the hospital tomorrow for a sweep. Due to my polyhydramnios my community midwife can't do it due to the risk of us all drowning in my amniotic fluid, so we have to go all the way to the hospital. I really hope it gets things moving, but I'm worried they'll accidentally break my waters and the force me into a CS when active labour doesn't start quickly enough. I know there's nothing bad about a section, but I'm so not prepared for one!

Sorry for moaning. I'm not keen on the potential for a cascade of interventions, and I've become something of a control freak I think ...

Thinking of those of you doing the night shifts feeding, and also those of us SFW/SC with multiple trips to the loo. Hope we all get some rest tonight.

Has anyone heard of using fenugreek to boost milk supply? It's something I just came across on another forum and wondered if anyone had heard of it before?

Bridget several friends recommended nipple shields so I bought medela ones in two sizes but I can't get on with them. I fed with them at 9ish - he took his usual hour to do both sides and then screamed. No he's feeding again and he's going do frantically I'm wondering if they have inhibited the milk flow - it's as if he's scared he'll never feed again he's so relieved to be back on the boob.

Tarlia C also hates being swaddled. We've just been covering him with a blanket.

Rox I have heard of fennel I think, not fenugreek but I may be wrong. No experience though.

Yup, heard of fenugreek and brewers yeast both increase supply. There are teas too usually called mothers milk or nursing tea (or similar). There are nursing cookie recipes on the net too.

mrsh I have a kicker. Manages to get blankets off in no time. Can you see the milk pooling in the shield when he comes off?

Good luck anything

bridget hope tomorrow helps

Not really Tarlia, there's a few beads that's it. They seem to just really pull my nipple into the teat and squash it.

At least you can be sure the milks getting to him. Maybe he is a bit confused as was used to the feeling of your skin. He'll get used to it.

Bf tip alert - I clip a hair band into the bra of the next side as I'd always forget, especially in the night and would wake with one rock in the morning. During the night I'm lazy and said hair band get swapped to the corresponding wrist.

Second timers, are you finding your boobs settled down much quicker after milk came in this time around?

Also while on tips... A cut up fleece blanket makes fantastic washable wipes. We have a flask of warm tap water on the change station for wipe/cotton wool wetting so they arnt freezing or running to bathroom all the time. I just poor enough into the dish they will soak up at each change.

Pour too ;)

Hi, congrats to all those with new babies!!

Very proud to add Archer Jacob (7lb 7) to our list.

He was born on 16th October (another due date baby) after a very long established labour with baby back2back which ended in forceps delivery as baby was in distress (narrowly avoiding c section). Turns out the cord was wrapped around his neck twice and was getting tighter every time a contraction made him turn, this was preventing him from engaging fully. Delivery team were awesome getting him untangled very quickly and after 2 heart stopping minutes he was resussed by the neonatal team. Given the 24+ hrs of established labour, with broken waters for about 40hrs pre-delivery, we were treated for infection and put in isolation room (barrier nursing the works) for 2.5 days. Our bloods/tests finally stabilised - we are now home and we're adjusting to life with a new born.

Haven't had a chance to fully read thread yet but I noticed a lot of BF challenges. I am feeling your pain, literally and figuratively, and am desperately grateful for the advice being offered... Keep it coming ladies!!!!

Good luck to those SFW and SWIL.

I couldn't use the medela shields in either size or agent ones (too flimsy) I ended up with mam ones. Amazing. Saw me thru with as til 9.5months having seriously hated bf. It hurt me to the point I was hitting myself to distract myself from the pain of my tattered nipples. So many bf counsellors,midwives etc saw us & couldn't say what the problem was. Almost all of them said shields were a bad idea. In the end I went with them though & I know if I hadn't our bf journey would have ended at about 6 weeks. I just couldn't take it anymore. All of you struggling have my sympathies. I am having my own issues with Lauren altho we seem to have just turned a corner & I am going to tuck her up & hit the hay too. I've had 8 hours-ish sleep since Thursday morning. I am fucked!!

rox yea i have heard of fenugreek as a good thing to take to stimulate supply. I did masses of research almost 3 years ago when i was Para about using nipple shields & what i could do to keep supply up. I drank nettle tea,fennel tea,couldn't source fenugreek locally (altho i think i later found out itwas American name for fennel. I might be hallucinating that though). The kellymom website is an incredible source of information on all this stuff.xx

Avent not agent.

Ugh tired!
Congrats whistling what a trauma for you I think my labour would have been similar so thank you for sharing ANC making me realise I chose wisely when I chose the cs once we knew he was back to back. I got emotional on the way home about never having been able to give birth and wondering if my busy just is a failure at it and also tearful for the little girl that would have taken our girls name and will never exist as we have our two babes now. Stupid hormones!

shooting I'm sorry you are mourning the little girl. However, think how fun too boys will be and boys always adore their mummy. I know how you feel as I want four but after this pregnancy and labour I may have to stop at my gorgeous boys. We are blessed but, there is that small feeling.

Eeeekkkk, tucking I hope Lauren allows you some zzzz's xx

Fenugreek and fenel are not the same, but do the same thing. en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galactagogue colicky the herbal tab. Apparently raspberry leaf is the same so get drinking that tea if you have any rox . Porridge is my fav though.

Hi, now I have no experience with breast feeding as a human......but in mares we often boost milk supply by feeding cocoa powder. For a mare I'd give about 4 -6 tbsp per day, given that they weigh approx 500kg I'm guessing a bit less for a human!! Sorry if this sounds insane and as I said, no experience as yet and no idea if this is any use for us but can't see why it wouldn't have a similar effect, can't hurt and more likely to have in cupboard than fenugreek ! Maybe a couple of mugs of cocoa a day ? I'm not suggesting anyone is like a horse. Promise I'm not totally mad.

Tarlia I put a safety pin on my bra yo remind me which side :). Although, as he seems to spend equal time on each side, I'm not sure it makes much difference.

I can report that the cheeky wipes are great - lovely to use and we washed the first lot today and it was dead easy. Washing machine seems to be getting some use, that for sure!

Hi everyone. I've been on mn hiatus due to the arrival of my gorgeous little boy Joshua Samuel at 10:30 am on Saturday. He was born at home as planned. Congratulations to everyone else who's had babies and good luck to everyone still expecting.

Contractions started 3 am Friday and built throughtout the day. By evening the contractions were not completely regular but 2-5 minutes apart and I was being sick with the pain. We called the mw who came and examined me and I was only 3 cm. When mw left at 11 pm I was exhausted and not dealing well with it. The home birth meant my pain relief options were so limited. I had already refused diamorphine and couldn't keep tablets of paracetamol down. After The mw left we tried to rest but I was really not dealing well and I was mentally preparing to make DH drive me to hospital for an epidural. Luckily at 3 am i had progressed enough that mw stayed and I could go in the birthing pool and have gas and air. The difference was unbelievable. All of a sudden I could get through it all. I started pushing at 7:30 am and J was born at 10:30. I caught him in the water. He came out with his hand by his head. DH was in the pool with me and we had a very special moment together. Unfortunately the delivery of the placenta and pain of my tears (internal due to the arm by his head) were a bit traumatic and I'm still in a bit of a daze, unsure about how I really feel about things. People keep telling me how well I did but I'm still processing things and my feelings are a bit mixed.

Tonight I'm struggling with lack of sleep. If he's put down, J will cry and root and look hungry. He'll feed for a bit, fall asleep on me, but I can't put him down! I'm so exhausted that I'm worried I'll fall asleep with him in my arms and hurt him, or that I'll sleep through his cries and neglect him. It's also a problem that it hurts to sit or walk due to my tearing and swelling but I can't lie down bc I have to hold the baby.

Sorry for the long selfish post. I made a point of reading the thread before posting but I can't remember everything and I can barely see straight. It gets easier eventually, right?

I've just put him down and he seems to be sleeping. I'm scared to lie down now in case I sleep too deeply and miss him waking up and needing me.