October 2013: Newborn snuggles and waddles to the finish line

[FeministInTraining]

Stats sheet here

New arrivals here

Key:
SC - still cooking (pre EDD)
SFW - still f*ing waiting (post EDD)
OWT - on way to theatre (CS)
IP - induction in progress
SWIL - somewhere in labour
LIT - lost in transition

Thanks roofio and would he usually go 4 hours between feeds? C has been feeding every 2 - 2.5 hours but to be fair he has just gone from 10-2 so that's 4 hours.

no, he's still feeding more often, although does seem to be managing longer stretches at night. I'm not suprised he's piling on the weight the little greedy guts!!

MrsHN - it would be very rare for a bf newborn to regularly go 4 hours between feeds. Formula is very different to bf in its make up and so the two aren't comparable re amounts or frequency. Bf babies do feed more frequently than ff babies. But you simply cannot over feed a bf baby... The bringing up undigested milk is just because the tips of babies' stomachs are usually not quite formed / sealed. If he's rooting, he's hungry... Do you have any more expressed?

Flyer [hugs] there is so much guit and pressure surrounding feeding. You've not had an easy time of it either with the CS and A being on antibiotics etc. When I stopped bf I did feel guilty, but now I'm enjoying the time I spend with T so much more. I really know what you mean about dreading the feeds, it's awful. There will be no judgement here whatever you decide to do

Tarlia - and hugs x

tarlia sorry you are feeling glum. I don't think you are alone at all there are a few ladies who are finding it a little harder going than expected. I think the exact worries are specific to each person but the general feeling is not. It must be a difficult balancing act with existing children and I'm sure there is no perfect solution just try and stick in there. Is there anyone in RL you can talk to?

Just got very very stroppy with our bloody neighbour who was parked in front of our garage YET AGAIN despite having been told not to about a million times . I marched out there, bump in full sail, and let him have it with both barrels. Actually it felt quite good and I don't think he'll be parking there again in a hurry

Oh, and Tarlia I know just what you mean dd1 was in a godawfulvery challenging mood yesterday for our first day out since T was born. Everything she did seemed to annoy me, and I found myself constantly telling her off and having to repeat myself over and over. It must be very hard for her to suddenly not be the centre of attention all the time now and I'm trying hard to be less irritable today and focus on positives. It's hard with no sleep though. You're not alone!

Thanks legally I suspected as much. No more expressed hence I'm feeding him now. Fortunately those four hours have given my poor boobs a bit of recovery time. Latch is getting a little better but it's still sore because I suppose they need time to recover as well, even when the latch is good. I'm going to go to the baby cafe thingy on tomorrow to get some more help with improving his latch. I haven't got the patience to keep endlessly correcting it and he will only put up with so much as well.

Hi all, congrats prisci
I have been following but generally too tired to post,,,sorry, a bit crap. Have the really sore nipples here too, feeding at least every 2 hours...

Tarlia I just wanted to offer some support - i did feel like that with DS1 - I suddenly found DD really annoying and just wanted to focus on the baby. I don't think i've ever admitted that to anyone, I felt so guilty about it and I know that DD felt it at the time, it was a really difficult adjustment period. It will be all fine in the end, it can't be such an unusual reaction, so try not too feel bad about it. As I say, it will all work itself out and you and DS1 will both get used to the new famiy dynamic. I think its hard for DPs to understand this. Sorry you've got the back pain, that must make evrything harder.

Would also love to see the photos on FB - can i pm you imp as well?

sure!

Thanks ladies. Feeling a little but better today, but am anxious for tomorrow when DH will be back to work (although a lot of his work is home based, so it's silly that it makes me anxious). I hate the idea that it's suddenly just me and Ailla, I'm sure that I will be fine though

Congratulations prisci! And yes our labours do sound similar. Completely took me by surprise!

Flyer I hope feeding is going a bit better. I have phases of hating it, but at the same time I like the feeling that Ailla "needs" me for something, and that I've always got pre-warmed food ready to go (except for when she is cluster feeding, then I hate it all and start researching the Tommee Tippee Perfect Prep machine for formula)...

Congratulations Prisci!

Well, as sad as I am to announce that I'm officially off the bus, (tongue out to those at the back!) I am quite enjoying some quiet newborn snuggles in a private birth centre room. (Sunday seems a good day to give birth!)
Madam Lily-Rose Pink (still no 1st name agreed) announced herself to North London at 11.22 this morning. She (phew!) arrived after contractions and monitoring thru the night not a lot of sleep had At 5ish I took paracetamol as I desperately wanted some sleep but 6ish I had some blood/show? and threw up quite dramatically (I'd forgotten that bit if labour!) Finally called DH in around 7 (mild panic as my mum wasn't waking to her phone and needed to take DS).
Anyway- long and short of it, contractions are foul things I'm pleased I'll never go thru again. Tens was ok but gas and air was great- especially having something to bite down on. MWs were fab-u-lous, thankfully cos DH went out to give my mum our house keys (DS had no shoes!) and decided to go for a leisurely walk and brekkie as we'd been told I prob had another 4hrs. He returned just as i pushed out Madams head and at least got to see her body appear!
The pushing was fantastically fast- I think 4 in all! Done squatting on the bed clinging on to the bedhead. A contrast to 2hrs of it on my back with DS. 2nd deg tear but feel ok for now.

I'm so relieved its over now as I know I'm never going to do that again- pregnancy or labour. 12 years of ttc are now over don't even think about how much ££ and we have 2DC to show for it. Madam is lovely but like Nat and others I can't quite believe she's ours, nor do I know how we'll all cope with her in our lives nipples wincing already. That's where this thread is a great support.

Oh- and my hip pain disappeared the second we left for the labour ward!

My thoughts are with you SFC, hopefully your bodies will be so ripe your bubbs will slip out with ease xx

(Apols for mammoth post, tv doesn't work!)

Huge congrats pinkforboys. four pushes in all?!?! I was pushing for two hours staight!!! haha. so glad you have your complete little family, bet you had times when you never thought you'd get here!! so pleased for you

Congratulations Pink sounds like you did a great job.

Thanks for all your supportive comments about bf, going to continue trying, I managed to do 2 feeds today, not long then topped up with expressed breast milk.

I've been monitoring the latch reasons for not working and I think it could be because she doesn't open her mouth wide enough so she ends up nipple feeding and I end up with sore nipples and enduring lots of toe curling pain.

Flyer that is exactly C's problem and he doesn't fling his head back enough. I regret not getting it sorted in hospital while I had the chance (I was just so pleased he was latching at all) so make the most of the support and tuition you (hopefully) have while you're there. I'm going to baby cafe tomorrow for help with the same thing. Badger the midwives and maternity support workers - that's what they're there for.

I nearly forgot - congratulations Pink!

Thanks so much for the support ladies, dh has also been so great I feel so guilty towards the whole situation as the last thing I wanted was too feel like this, I went to my friends little girls party today mainly so dd didn't miss out and thought the fresh air would do me good but had to run from car to party as the rain was fucking horrendous and am now getting horrible back cramps as as result. At an all time low last night when H had been awake near on all of the night and dd was also up with a bad cough I asked dh if we could put him up for adoption? Now sitting here thinking about it I feel even worse that the thought crossed my mind especially as we actually planned this baby! Dh offered to sleep downstairs with him for a few nights so I can get more sleep and hope that fixes the situation but I've said no as I think if I do more feeds/changes/cuddles with him it will help me to bond- and infact I wouldn't say I have any resentment toward my baby its just I miss our old 'easy' life of just me dh and dd if that makes sense?

Its our wedding anniversary Tuesday and mum has offered to have both kids in the afternoon for an hour or two so dh and I can have a pub lunch together... I am considering the idea but then at the same time think it makes me a terrible mum as he will only be 6 days old at the time.

flyer how r u? I hope your home sooner rather than later and your dp bucks his ideas up xxx

Sending sympathies to all those struggling with feeding, I'm ff and my milk came in today and that's making my boobs sore enough never mind what u ladies r going through!!

Sympathies to those sc and SFW

Congratulations to all those currently snuggling their beautiful new borns xxx

Congrats pink and prisci
we have (finally) named dd Lucinda, dh wants to put my name as her middle name as we have a tradition of using family names but not sure yet.

love and hugs to all those struggling with lack of sleep/feeding/bonding x xx

X posts nat go for the pub lunch - it's only a couple of hours, go easy on yourself, and just do what feels right x x

Congratulations Pink! With DD, my DH also did the whole slow brekkie / mosey on down thing (I was being induced) and arrived the contraction before she crowned!!!

Flyer - just to rule it lit, get someone sensible to check whether Alex has toungue tie. It means they can't open their mouth wide enough. Does the tip of her toungue look heart shaped? Seriously well done for carrying on.

Flyer this may be wrong advise. But maybe try nipple shields? At least until you have fully looked at tongue tie or her mouth is bigger.
Madela ones are £7 so in grand scheme of things not a huge amount. But means you can bf, easier for her to latch and reduces the pain for you.

Wish I'd tried with my first son. As they have made a massive difference.

I don't know if its good advise. But think it worth trying for anyone with latch issues. And if its nipple shield vs quitting bf why not try?

Yes yes to nipple shields!

I'm also using the medela ones. Boots ones are too flimsy. Definitely saved me in the short term and still use them now and again when Isaac is struggling to latch.

Congrats pink

sorry for not replying earlier to the advice from you lovely ladies about Lily's bad wind, I have been hibernating! On advice from the mw I found it was the dummy that helped the most in the end as she was over feeding as wanting to suck, so now she's feeding less she has the dummy. I also have used some gripe water. As much as I hate dummies was never going to use one lol my mental health has improved now I don't have such an unhappy baby all the time - just sometimes!