Graduated Elderberries - Thread 8

[Cavort]

The over 30's expecting/just given birth to their first little bundle of joy.

Thread 8 already!!

On a happier note had some professional photos taken of Harvey this morning, I am beyond excited to see the results.

Oh gosh yes, I should have warned you to eat fibre. The last thing you want after a c section is to strain on the loo

I think that any position apart from flat on back comes with an increased risk of SIDS. I may be wrong though. Sometimes if Miles won't settle though I lay him on his side and pay his back slowly, as soon as he's asleep I roll him onto his back. Might be worth a try?

Merk you have my sympathies, having SPD sucks ass!! The good news is that mine went the second I gave birth and also that mine didn't get much worse as pregnancy progressed so it's not all doom and gloom. I don't think there's much you can do for it other than avoiding the things you know make it worse and sleep with a pillow between your knees to align the pelvis. If it gets really bad you can get physio but I think the effectiveness of that is a bit of a lottery. IIRC the things which aggravate SPD are turning over in bed (exactly how you can avoid this I don't know?), pushing a supermarket trolley, getting in and out of cars with your legs apart, swimming breast stroke and standing for long periods. So basically you need to keep your knees together unless you're asleep in which case you should aim to have them slightly apart. Oh, and I also believe very frequent moaning about it to anyone who'll listen also helps to alleviate symptoms.

Lol Elodie's sleeping has been a bit hit and miss for the last 6 or so weeks but has only become particularly bad (ie, up for hours in the night) in the last few weeks. I don't think it happens to all babies so FX it passes Lara by. And I hope you feel better soon. It's shit being ill while BFing when you can't take any decent drugs.

Absolutely yes to the Janey. It's the only thing keeping me sane!

Oh and Mother my nephew suffers with reflux and sleeps on his back with a wedge under his mattress to lift his top end. My Sister also swears by the MAM bottles and gripe water in helping with his wind and reflux.

Keep meaning to buy gripe water and forgetting. Doh! I do have the carrycot on a slope so fingers crossed that is enough. Might so the same as you Janey and roll him once he's asleep.

I don't think Gripe Water is recommended under a month so no rush. Elodie just had the normal newborn wind which they all have and GW definitely helped get it up once she was old enough to have it.

Ahh fair enough, won't rush then! Harvey's is just normal wind, the result of a very fussy feeder I think!

Something not baby related - what are you all getting your families (parents, PILs etc) for xmas? Women are easy, but it's so difficult to buy for men, especially if they don't have any particular interests or hobbies.

My dad will probably get boring stuff, books, jumpers etc. He is so hard to buy for!!! My OH has a bad case of 'I want' so is easy to buy for....I'll get a list bo doubt! My brother has heaps of hobbies so he is easy too. My issue is how we afford xmas this year. My smp kicks in just before xmas.....ouch!

Might make a photo book of Harvey for my mum as part of her present and maybe a calendar I think she'd like that. Could do something similar for my MiL too.

Have a feeling I'll struggle to be ready this year. It's really going to creap up on me! Think online shopping will be the way forward as marching round the shops with a tiny baby doesnt seem appealing!

Merkin, I can absolutely sympathise with the 'just eaten an Xmas dinner' sensation - I had that from maybe 22-30 wks? Since then either I have stretched or I have got used to it, but it doesn't seem as bad anymore.

Can I ask all you mothers - do your ribs go back to normal after? I have stretched several inches round my ribcage (meaning I have already grown out of the bigger bras I bought and now am in stretchy crop tops as can't stand anything squashing my ribs) but what I am concerned about is them not returning to their former width - I will have to replace half my wardrobe as well as all my bras!

Quod yes, I went from 32 to 36 bra back size during pregnancy and am nicely back in 32 now, no problems.

I have got my Dad and Step-Mum a voucher for a spa day with a three course meal afterwards. DH says he is getting a set top box which turns any TV into a smart TV for his parents (I assume he knows they want one of these rather than just taking a stab in the dark), and my Mum is a mystery and always ends up getting the fail-safe perfume/jumper/jewelry. I haven't thought about anyone else yet. BIL is going to Afghanistan after Xmas so I will probably get him some kind of brain games as I know their free time is mind-numbingly repetetive and dull. Personally I am in favour of bypassing Christmas altogether and going straight to January Bah, humbug!

thought my boobs felt full, just expressed 8oz....wowzers!!

Ladies, your worries with non-sleeping babies are over! A colleague just told me what to do with Viki, who wants to eat several times every night - don't feed him, just leave him cry, he must learn that night is for sleeping. Rod for your own back otherwise.
See, easy!

I was She actually thinks I should leave my 4-month old screaming of hunger until he figures out that there's no food coming after dark? I don't fucking think so.

Some people's views are shocking. Although I guess they think we're decent people nuts for looking after our still teeny babies at night.

Saw Alex today - looks so well and I'm so excited about inviting myself round to meet her baby very soon Hurry up out baby!

Oh my god, some people have no idea! How on earth could you leave a hungry baby crying!! I know Harveys 'I'm hungry' cry now, its different to his other crys so easy to know when he is crying due to hunger rather than wind etc. As if I could just leave him to cry himself into such a tired state that he goes back to sleep?!? Plus when he crys my boobs start to leak, I could bloody drown!

Wouldn't it be nice to tell those people where to go!!

janey I am so excited to hear alex exciting news

Good work on cracking the cries Mother... tho be warned, they change them. A good hunger cue that I picked up from a mag was that there's a sort of dry cough that indicates hunger. H definitely does it... but he's also started nuzzling his mouth onto whoever's chest he is nearest, and pulling at my top!

Exciting times here today following the city of culture announcement.

Have discovered a slight issue - I'm eating crap at the moment and I can feel myself getting fat. It's freaking me out a bit as I've never been overweight or fat ib my life and it's frustrating after losing all the baby weight that it feels like I'm about to put it back on.

Think it's a combo of being knackered, not being able to exercise (simply no time), and sheer boredom. Some days I take H out but I'm restricted to the local children's centre and the city centre - but there's not much to do there (other than shop).

The other days I stay home for recovery days for H and me but find myself being sucked into feeding H, getting him to sleep and then entertaining him in between. If I can put him down for a few minutes I'll do some housework. I don't see or speak to anyone until DP comes home.

It's frustrating and boring. I can't even write letters etc as half the time, he's on my right arm!

Anyone have any genius ideas? Or feels the same?

Cheers brave, yeah Harvey has almost a bark when he's hungry.

I just ate a whole bag of kettle chips so I can't comment really on the food front.

Totally different topic but we are watching the new Micky Flanagan dvd so so funny!! A must watch!!

Hazle I feel very sorry for your colleague's DC's. Research has proven that cortisol levels in babies who have been 'Feberised' are still elevated even after they stop crying before going to sleep which means they are not self-soothing and they haven't suddenly decided that they aren't hungry, they have just given up but are actually just as stressed as they were when they were crying. It really bothers me to think of these little babies doing what we as a species have naturally evolved to do in seeking comfort and reassurance from a parent but instead they are just left to cry alone in the dark. It just goes against all your natural instincts to ignore your baby's cries.

Yes the night-wakings are knackering, especially at the moment, but if I wanted a good nights sleep I wouldn't have had a baby It's really not a shocking discovery that a baby makes you lose sleep.

Brave I get where you're coming from and it is undoubtedly tough. I try to arrange it so we have somewhere to go every day but sometimes it just doesn't work out like that and it can be hard spending the day with just a demanding baby and a dog for company. I'm looking forward to Elodie dropping her third nap, which I believe usually happens around 6-7 months, as her needing to nap makes getting out and about difficult sometimes and she is a beast when she gets over tired.

Odd question. Is it possible that my milk flows too fast for Harvey? My midwife said I had very fast let down and it made me wonder. He seems to struggle at the start of a feed and coughs a fair amount on the milk, this is much worse during the night. Thinking about it I always have sore leaky boobs when I feed him at night so maybe he is just getting too much milk too quickly.

I've tried expressing for him today and using the dr browns bottles to feed him, he hasnt choked once and has had no issues at all with wind.

Was just a thought. I am still perservering with bfing but just trying to work out ways to make both our lives easier. If using a bottle at night gets us both more sleep/less wind I am willing to try it. totally selfish I know

Not selfish one little bit. Do NOT feel guilt for doing what is best for you and your son

Have obviously jinxed myself. Been woken up 4 times so far (5 last night) and currently have a baby chatting away to herself like there's no tomorrow
Mother have a look at different feeding positions. If you lean back a bit your let down slows down I think. Expressing and giving him a bottle in the middle of the night is not a problem at all however much more of a faff in my opinion as you will have to take bottle from the fridge and warm it up! I'd stay in bed at all costs!

I'd second the leaning back tactic, or you could either express a bit at the start til after the letdown or encourage Harvey to pop off until the flow is slower.

We had this issue for a while and H sort of taught himself to pop off if the flow was too fast. It did settle down though by about 8-10 weeks, which was also when I stopped leaking (barring the odd missed feed).

Sooo today is my BFP anniversary! Strange to think I must have already been the best part of 6 weeks gone as H arrived almost exactly 8 months later.

I still thank Janey, Cavort and Hazle for nagging encouraging me to poas already!

It's funny what a difference a year makes - this time last year I was calling to DP to wait before leaving for work as the line was getting darker, and then I dashed out to tell him on the stairs. And this morning he's just kissed us goodbye while I feed our nearly 4 month old :)

And Lol sorry to hear about your uber rough night - yikes. How is L doing now? Is she better?