Graduated Elderberries - Thread 8

[Cavort]

The over 30's expecting/just given birth to their first little bundle of joy.

Thread 8 already!!

Viki still wakes a few times to feed, but luckily just eats and falls asleep. I could not function if he decided to stay awake for a few hours in the middle of the night.
He had his first day with the childminder, went fine and he seemed happy as usual. Childminder also mentioned that he doesn't sleep much during the day, which I've also noticed. Obviously he hasn't read the books claiming that he should not be awake for more than 1,5-2 hours, he can easily wake up at 6Am and not nap until after lunch, or stay awake the whole afternoon. But as long as he sleeps fine during the night and is generally happy and content, I guess this is not doing him any harm.

Eating was a little better yesterday, managed 100 ml between 1PM and 6PM. Which is of course not enough, but better. The freezer is full of milk now, I really hope he starts eating properly and we don't have to waste it.

Hazle I think many people use left over expressed milk to mix with porridge etc. after weaning so nothing should go to waste even if Viki continues his bottle strike.

I have concluded that all advice on what babies should be dong sleep-wise should be taken with a large pinch of salt as they're all so different. We are very lucky (or unlucky depending on how you view it ) that Elodie makes it very obvious by getting quite grumpy when she is tired so we can put her down to sleep. I have read that when babies go overtired their brains release cortisol and adrenaline which can make them continue to seem happy and alert when they actually do need to be asleep. I think this is true as I know it's happened a few times with Elodie. I think this explains these hormones much better than I can. I'm sure you'd notice if Viki was showing signs of overtiredness so he is probably just one of these babies who need less daytime sleep and make up or it at night - I wish I had one of those! Elodie doesn't follow the textbooks regarding sleep duration as she tends to just catnap rather than having the 2 hour naps that the alleged experts think she should have, but as you say she wakes up happy so I guess short naps are all she needs. If only we all had these 'textbook' babies.

I should also add that my DH was apparently the worst sleeping baby in the whole world. Didn't sleep at all during the day and was up several times every night until he was 3, but at 18 was turning down an Oxbridge place can you believe it, what a moron so it appears not to have done his development much harm.

Morning all and welcome and congrats to the new berries!

Hi Poppy, re buying stuff, the stuff you need need is nowhere near as much as you think!

A good pram/travel system is really important I think. I was so lucky that my parents bought ours so we could get a better quality one (Mothercare Orb- totally recommend).

You'll find that people are so generous with clothes etc- we were given loads of second hand stuff and new stufftoo.

Definitely look at ebay/freecycle etc - we gpt moses basket, cotbed, baby bjorn miracle carrier, graco swing all for 150 quid from eBay (not all at once only got last three in last 6 weeks). You can find really good quality stuff.

Big sympathy for those in sleep regression hell. We put H in his cotbed on Saturday night - was up 3-6 and again at 730. Killer.

Since then we've put his basket in the cot so he can adjust to new room without too much change at once. He's slept loads better since...

At night anyway. Off to baby massage later. He's really cranky today and if I'm honest I don't want to take him out but we've had to wait ages for this so feel like I should.

he does sometimes pull his ears like that article describes, that's definitely a sign that he's tired. But otherwise I also think I would notice if he's struggling to stay awake or is just happily babbling and playing.

Since it got colder, he sleeps really well outside in the buggy - in the summer he only slept there when the buggy was moving and was awake thye second it stopped, now sometimes has long naps outside. Have to see what cocoon or footmuff to get for winter, as where I come from, we do this as well:
www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-21537988

I have a sleep fighter vows here too and not much day sleep going on either. But at night she's fine so I'm taking the pain at the moment.
On other news my boiler packed in so I'm having a new one installed. Almost 2 grand for the pleasure
No heating and no hot water since yesterday so not too pleased.
Hope you are all good

Vows here????
Over here!

Talking of ebay....any thoughts on this? www.ebay.co.uk/itm/like/130956701076?hlpht=true&ops=true&viphx=1&lpid=95&device=m&adtype=pla&crdt=0&ff3=1&ff11=ICEP3.0.0&ff12=67&ff13=80&ff14=95

Our well off uber rich friends, have a cocoon-a-baby and my OH was very impressed and wants one, but they cost £130, which we don't have. The above looks similar but obviously less flashy, I can't really see why we need one but you know what me are like!!

Lol We only have daytime sleep because we help her get to sleep. Fat chance of her just nodding off unless she's in the car or pram. And sometimes she takes longer to get her to sleep than she actually naps for. Thank goodness she's much better at going to sleep at bedtime.

Hazle sticking your baby outside to nap in -5 degrees seems bizarre in our culture but thinking about it logically it is a good idea as long as the baby's core is warm enough and I can definitely see the sense in the swaddling aspect of it. Elodie doesn't sleep well if she's too hot - never thought about sticking her in the garden. I think if my neighbours spot her asleep in the pram outside in the snow they would call social services on me!

Mother they do look very similar but I personally would wait and see how well baby sleeps in the items you already have before shelling out for anything else. If your baby ends up anything like Elodie she prefers to nap in something that bounces/vibrates/rocks and will only tolerate stationary sleeping at night.

those cultural differences can be funny - in Estonia it's all about fresh air, babies must get fresh air. If someone on a local mumsnet-type of page mentions that she didn't go out for a walk as it's too cold or raining too heavily, everybody will be up in arms "But how will the baby get fresh air!?!?" Not that the houses are particularly stuffy or anything.

Viki happily sleeps in our garden, it's a small quiet village so not worried about kidnapping - and besides, the dogs stay next to the pram whenever he's out sleeping, they will certainly let us know if there's anybody else in the garden.

cavort that's exactly what I said to my fella but you know what men are like! I'm not fussed either way, so if he wants to spend his cash on it he can. I don't see where we will use it though? We have a swinging crib for the bedroom and I'm hoping to use the carrycot or a friends travel cot (which we are borrowing) for when we are in the front room. Men always have an 'I want' attitude though don't they or is that just mine?.

I think some men like to buy their way out of problems - real or potential - my DP isn't that bad but when H was up every 90 minutes in the first few weeks, he was determined that formula would fix everything.

I've popped in for a moment of smugness. H went down just after 9, grizzled so fed more and went down properly at 10. He woke at 520 for a half hour feed, then again at 9ish. Oh. My. God!

I know it's not going to last but I am definitely enjoying it at the moment :)

How funny brave!!! I had the exact same timings in here!!! L still asleep which is bliss!!

Well jel of these sleeping babies! After a few lovely days of good sleeping, Elodie has reverted back to a 2 stop nightime strategy. Damn it!

Just in the Doctors waiting room ready for 16 week jabs and just had her weighed. I now have a 91st centile 16lb 6oz chunky monkey. Not measured her though so hoping that she is also long rather than just fat! HV's are measuring her next time we come before she falls of the chart completely.

Vic wanted to eat 3 times between midnight and 4am, after that I gave up counting, probably a few more times. Dh reports that he is now happily snoozing. Of course he would be.

Elodie is really being well fed!

Rather a fat baby than a skinny one though cavort - Lucy is only 10lbs 11 so I'm clearly not feeding mine, she's falling off the other end of the chart...though I wouldn't mind being as long and thin as she is myself! Don't know where she gets it from, me and her daddy are short and fat

MIL reports that DH was 2 stone by the time he was one but was still 2 stone at two so I assume Elodie is taking after him as I was apparently a very average-sized baby. 2 bloody stone, who needs a gym!!

Bye bye bingo wings!

Oh and you do know it's all your fault don't you? In this house every time the baby farts/had trapped wind/does a disgusting nappy/cries I get asked 'what have you been eating to Do this to her?' wanker so clearly you should cut down on the deep fried mars bars

Ha Purple that's totally the opposite to my DP who fails to accept any correlation between my diet and H and keeps putting tons of garlic in when he cooks

Goodness me Cavort that's extraordinary! Go you! I'm gonna get H weighed again next week. I think he's put abit on in the last week or two - he's noticeably chunkier.

I don't want to be like the mum I was next to at baby massage yesterday tho who kept banging on and on about her massive baby. Well he was 10lb 9oz and had a head circumference off the chart at birth, delivered by section after a 4-day unsuccessful induction. But that was 22 weeks ago! still ginormous tho

Baby massage was really nice tho btw - totally recommend it.

Ah he must have read about this experiment:

Yet in one experimental taste test, 3-month old babies showed a preference for garlic. Researcher Julie Mennella and her team asked lactating moms to eat garlic and then watched how their babies responded. When the garlic reached its peak concentration in their mothers’ breast milk, the babies suckled longer at the breast (Mennella and Beauchamp 1991).

Oh dear, at this rate I'm going to end up with the ignominious title of first berry to become a line parent...things are not going well in the purple household.

Lone even.

Purple poor you to be going through a difficult time. Is there somewhere you can go for a few days to have some time to be away from things and think it over? I'm not saying it will change/solve anything, but it will maybe help you to get your head clearer. If the situation is making you (both?) miserable maybe being alone is better, even if the thought of it may be very frightening.
I hope you're ok, tell me to butt out if that's what you'd prefer. Hugs x