December 2013 - steaming towards 3/4 cooked

[LadyMedea]

Our shiny new thread... Pile in!

B0nkers that sounds a bit rubbish on your midwife's part. I was expecting to be sent to the back of the queue by the midwives as this is my DC2 as well, but so far all seems to be OK, and I have had 3 appointments so far, and have another at 28 weeks then go onto have quite a few more - I think it is 34, 36, 38 and 40 wks, but maybe I have remembered that wrong - it seems a lot!

I think we're supposed to have the whooping cough jab any time from 28wks - can you make a separate appointment with a practice nurse for this?

Is anyone having the flu jab? I didn't when I was pregnant with DD , but that was 4yrs ago and the flu jab was new and seemed a bit 'un-tested' so I didn't risk anything. Not sure what to do this time around though...

I have finally confirmed my maternity leave with work, and am worried I have been too sensible and have talked myself out of more maternity pay! This is long and boring, but after I went back to work following DD's arrival I worked 3 days per week. I increased this to 4 days per week this year as I took over from my boss as her maternity cover, but this was always only a one year contract at 4 days.

HR had initially calculated my benefits for next year on 4 days, but I flagged that they shouldn't really do that as my contract was due to return to 3 days in 2014, and I didn't want to take the benefits only to have to pay them back.

They confirmed today that I could take the 4 days benefits while on maternity leave, if I confirmed I would return to work on a 4 day basis. I have just said 'no thanks' to this, so I will take the 3 days benefits and only return as 3 days a week.

Am I mad?! I am just trying to be realistic thinking about the implications of having two children at two different types of childcare, and managing all those drop offs and pick ups. Working fewer days means fewer headaches with pick ups and drop offs, and allows me to spend more time with DC2, as I did with DD.

Sorry - this is incredibly long and rambly - just trying to get my head round it all!

mumoftwo think its everyone. I have no history familial or otherwise of GD. Think it's just a standard test now, that's why I can't work out why they're doing it to people who are such low risk.

Bloods came back saying I was anaemic, I kept saying I thought I was, but booking bloods were normal. Not been able to stay awake for more then a few hours and really short or breath. Kind of glad it's anaemia so I can do something about it, instead of feeling lazy, tired and grumpy all the time. :-)

Technically your maternity benefits are calculated from your qualifying period, so if you're working 4 days then it's based on 4 days. If there are additional benefits on top then that might depend on your contract but if you have a specific 1 year 4 day contract which covers your qualifying period I should think that's what they should be paying you. But I might be wrong...

Ugh I am practically spinning with tiredness. Shower and bed and hopefully no horrid dreams tonight!

Hmmm Nom I am confused really. I will be getting 4 day a week salary and benefits for any maternity leave that is in 2013 (when my 4 day contract is running).

I understand the idea that it should be calculated on the qualifying period, but think that as my working days aren't on a rolling contract, but fixed at 4 days for 2013 only, that is why this is happening. Since I looked at it, it has been checked out by our heads of HR who are usually pretty hot on employment law etc, so I am hoping they're not ripping me off!

I can get an appointment with the practise nurse but I was kind of hoping that they would tell you these things as standard rather than be told to go and research yourself... And I feel like I'm being a little needy but some help/advice would be nice!!!

I'm no expert on maternity packages but don't they base it on the average weekly earnings of a certain period before?? So if you are working 4 days that's what it's based on? (I might have got the wrong end of the stick) also they still have to pay any benefits on top (ie pension and healthcare etc)...

lis you can make a separate normal appointment for the cough jab, I had mine last week and she said to ring up at the end of the month for the flu jab. Don't wanna be floored with flu at the latter stages of pg so I figure it's well worth it.
Feel really guilty about having been crashed out in front of the TV all day. Had plans to tidy bambino's room and do some cleaning and baking, but it just never happened. OH will prob be a bit narked when he gets in but too late now Telling myself I will get it done tomorrow....

Hey lisba your statutory mat pay is calculated on what you earnt in the 8 weeks up to the 15 weeks before your EDD (the 'qualifying week'). So this should definitely be at your 4 day a week rate. I am sure it is irrelevant for SMP what you would return to, it's about what you earnt in that 'relevant period', as employers are liable for SMP even if you leave after the 'qualifying week'. This would be most relevant for those first 6 weeks of SMP which are at 90% of earnings.

I would also imagine your employer uses the same 'relevant period' for any occupational maternity pay (mine does) but you'd have to check that one. If they do then you should be entitled as if you were on a 4 day week. I think it would e are for tem to justify not using your current earnings as a basis for calculation rather than some national future earnings limit.

Just done some more digging and you definitely, definitely are entitled to the higher rate of SMP so make sure you get that even if you get a lower occupational component.

Oops, seems that skipping dinner while pregnant may result in scoffing leftover cheesecake at 4.30am...

Morning all

Violet that made me smile. I had a handful of fruit pastilles at 4.45am this morning that were handily at the side of my bed!

5ammy think I am possibly anemic too. No energy at all come 3.30pm and horribly out of breath. Can't do anything physical 2 days on the trot or I get horrendously tired!

Had a problem last night in that I couldn't turn over in bed! Everytime I moved left or right I got a horrible pulling pain across my tummy. Do you know what I think it was? Trapped wind pmsl. Had a couple of really good farts to the point DP woke up and asked who was at the door at this time of night and felt lots better!

Who knew that farts could cause pain like that? Thought I had done something bad to my bump and I hadn't. Just a trapped trump or 2.

Need to take a jug upstairs for the bathroom though I think. Struggling sitting up and down to wash and condition my hair everynight so will have a good soak then sit up and do hair and have a wash and then get out. Tummy gets that pointy thing when I haul myself up now and that can't be good!

Lol violet, I haven't had that in years.

I never got told about my whooping cough jab by the 20th or maybe 5th midwife I've seen so far either, I remember hearing about it on the radio and asked her and she old me to make an appt with the nurse for it. Lucky me or not the nurse was till there so she did it right away and when she asked if midwife had told me about it and I said no she wasn't very happy at all, she said its her job to inform EVERY pregnant women at 28 weeks.

I'm skipping the flu jab though, never had it with an if the other 2.

Cant believe I'm 30 weeks on Monday, now I can count down

I hadn't heard about the whooping cough jab till I read it on here so thanks to whoever mentioned it- at least now I can mention it at my 28wk apt if mw doesn't. Having my flu jab next week with DC2 (he gets a nasal spray, no fair!) I had it with both previous pregnancies. No side effects and was thankful for it as had a friend who gave birth with the flu and it was awful for her and then her baby got it so just think about it, might be worth it ESP as its that time of year when bugs are everywhere!

I had cereal before bed and it seems to stop the midnight hunger pangs tho DH thought i was a pig as we had just had a huge dinner! I've just had breakfast no. 2 . Think it's going to be another hungry day!.....

Thanks all for the tips! I will make it clear that statutory pay needs to be calculated off the 4 days (my days in my qualifying period).

It's really the company enhancement that I am confused by, so I will do some more digging before speaking to HR again.

It's shocking that the midwives tell us so little really, isn't it?!
Part of the reason that I joined MN was because my GP forgot about me and didn't assign a midwife to me until I was about 14/15 weeks, so I was completely clueless! In fact I still feel like I have no idea what's going on sometimes, so it's a good job I've got you lot here for reassurance

violet I'm SO jealous of your cheesecake, that sounds like the perfect stupid-o'clock-in-the-morning-snack!

Just realised that quite a few people from the last few December threads seem to have dropped off the radar. Hope everyone's ok...

Also, this morning I told DP I was sad that I'd eaten all my chocolate yesterday... His response was "Looks like you'd better go and buy yourself some more today then!"
What a terrible influence!

Had a couple of really good farts to the point DP woke up and asked who was at the door at this time of night oh god Frouby I have just laughed so hard at the comment I snorted like a pig. Thanks

I am finally in the 3rd trimester club. Woo! 27 weeks today. eek! I am permanently starving, but I can't eat everything I want because we have very little food. Just enough for 3 meals a day to last us till saturday when DP's parents have very kindly paid for a delivery from Sainsburys. Got my GTT tomorrow, hate having blood taken as my veins are pretty much invisible and it always hurts :(

I will have a good think about flu jab mum
Tbh I was just really worried about side affects and people telling me you got a bad cold after the jab also.

I've just started to kick my cold and I hate them lol so I didn't really want another one so close.

oh no, the nausea and food aversions are back...I thought they had gone away forever.

whisper yay! I'm almost 3rd tri club- 3 more days!! (and they say hunger is worse in 3rd tri so my body is just a bit early!)

that's rubbish that you don't have much food- nothing worse than being hungry and not being able to eat enough! I sympathise- feeling the pinch right now and really trying to be frugal. Did a cheap Aldi shop this week, really chuffed at how cheap then still had to go to Sainsburys as Aldi just don't sell everything, and spent an extra £30 kind of undoing all that frugality! Also DC2 is starting football on sunday which is free but he doesn't have any shoes to run in except for some summer canvas ones that won't last a second outside in the mud-so need to get him trainers, DC1 needs winter shoes, and I had to buy myself a coat so our 'budget' for next week is already looking miniscule and I have to buy more food from it! I must admit I do get a bit of a kick out of trying to make cheap/frugal meals but it's not easy- we always have one lentils/beans meal a week as it's so cheap (lentil ragu- like bolognaise but without the meat is a hit with the kids)

Whisper- if you get some oats, honey and some apricots/dates or whatever you like in the cupboards you can always make a few batches of flapjacks to get you through snack times? Then you could freeze some for a later date too.

My food marathon continues- had a banana after breakfast 2 now a big slice of date loaf I made yesterday (also cheap to make!) it's bloody scrummy with butter on!) Sorry must stop talking about food!

Had a horrid dream last night. Had a nice chat with DH last night about the gender of our baby. I have been worried it's another boy, not because i don't want a boy but just because it could end up being a very lively/manic/crazy household with 3 boys!! But someone he knows has 3 boys and she said it is easy with boys, they all play together, and very loving etc. So am feeling better about it. In my dream I REALLY wanted to find out what I was having and weirdly I could see inside my body to have a look and he/she was wearing a nappy (??) tried to look then noticed there was lots of meat chopped up around the baby and it turned out to be meat from the baby??!!!! It was really bloody weird. And I didn't find out what sex the baby was in the end anyway!....

just crossed posts- sorry to hear that whisper please ignore all the food related stuff in my post then!! don't want you feeling even more sick!

haha. Its ok mum I think i'll go back to my mashed potato and beans, least that's easy to throw up.

In my hospital all women do the sugar test - go in, drink Lucosade, wait hour get test or something - then others do the full fasting, three sessions GTT job. I had the GTT and it wasn't too bad, just a lot of waiting around, although Junior went mental with the kicks five minutes after the lucosade! It only got hard on the last blood take where you are quite dehydrated and start to feel a little yucky.

I'm glad I took the whole day to do it, as feeling a little off now, so the luxury of an afternoon nap will be wonderful.

your you are feeling nauseous whisper - hopefully it's temporary - I had a qeasy few days on Sun/Mon but they seem to have drifted away

mumof scary dream! Sounds awful. I find ASDA seems to be the best place for cheap shoes atm - my work shoes came from there and I'm still in them after six months (I wreck shoes).

Hope you feel better soon whisper.
Mum - I keep dreaming that dd is 10 weeks premature or that when I see the consultant in 3 weeks he says I have to have a c-section but the epidural or whatever they use doesn't work and I feel everything.
Then it turns into dd being 2 or 3 and it's Christmas and she sneaks into our bed lol.

Hi lovelies sorry I've been missing for a while. Had my 28wk midwife appointment today. I'm measuring spot on for dates so hopefully growth scan in 6 weeks will confirm it and I can try for a vbac :) had glucose tolerance test on Monday which came back clear yay but I'm borderline anaemic again so starting iron tablets. Will catch up on all the posts.

sorry i've not had too much time in the past few days. just skimmed through messages. i hope everyone is doing well. i was told about whooping cough by my GP at my 25 wk appointment but I don't know if the MW will do it at my next visit (in two weeks). I really hope so, because I wont time to take another appointment before I leave the country and at least that's one thing I don't have to worry about getting done in the US.

so i know it's crazy, but I literally popped over the past couple of weeks and I now have a really defined basketball sized bump and I know it’s just going to get bigger and bigger in the next 13 weeks. looking at the mirror today, I just realized for the first time that I will have to push out whatever is in there. It already seems SO big to go through a tiny little hole.
I obviously knew what I was getting myself into but I guess while she was still small it didn’t seem that scary and it was still so far away. It’s becoming so real and I’m starting to get really nervous about giving birth… I know I’m being silly and it’s just natural, but any other first time moms just a little worried out there? 13 weeks, that's really right around the corner!!!!