September 2013- Annoying "Any news?" texts, maternity leave and BABIES!

[fl0b0t]

Looks like we need another new thread - we've been rather busy!

Up to date (ish) Stats thread here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/a1694946-September-2013-STATS-THREAD

As previously- Welcome newbies! If anyone wants to join the Facebook group (better for sharing documents and pictures- especially picture of gorgeous babies), please message myself or jennimoo with your real life name and email address and we can add you to the group!

Bring on the irritating texts from family members and best friends to find out whether you've had your babies or not (like you wouldn't tell them.....), more weird and disgusting labour symptoms, more internal examinations than you can shake a stick at, and LOTS OF BABIES!

Brilliant news Lotsa! Hope you and little Zach are now enjoying some time together

Mango, that sounds immense! Congratulations to Lotsa and Tat - even when not having a baby I love hearing all about people's different birth stories, it's mad how many ways we humans can produce babies!
Rake - I'd hold off for a couple of days now if I were you - this heat is tres annoying with a teeny baby, and the hospital room will be sweltering. Wait until Thursday night when the weather's set to cool down!

I'm hoping to pop at home, SGJ, so with any luck I wont have to suffer a sweltering PN ward at all... Nevertheless as time ticks by you have to think through different ways it might pan out, so last night DH and I had a run through of the arguments for/against induction based on being "overdue" and also the backchat we might have to deploy if advised to transfer in to hosp during birth process or afterwards for more checks. I have some trenchant views... :) So now DH is even better prepped to be my walking talking dynamically responsive birth plan.

wow Lotsa, that's quite a birth story! Glad it went well though and you have a healthy baby.

Thanks badguider and kitten we had a lovely but very hot pizza lunch!

Kitten & Juniper - as Fl0 is more reliable than me, she'll be in touch abt a Surrey meet next week.

Huge congratulations Lotsaand Tat

Congratulations tat and lotsa sounds all quote dramatic but glad all is well. Is it standard now to c section all breech babies? Do they not even try to support a normal birth? Intrigued ...

having spent much of the day asleep I am quite annoyed to find it is a gorgeous day outside! Might haul the whale like carcass out for a walk, especially as I weighed in at 80kg this morning, although I think that was partly a huge brekkie (nb I was 57kg in January!)

I was told at nct class 3 y ago that as times gone on more and more breech babies are delivered by CS and so fewer MWs have experience of delivering them, making it more risky than it was.
I expect that you would be supported to deliver without CS but I expect they'd prefer to avoid the risk, and so discourage you!

Not sure if it's procedure for all breech babies, but they seemed to imply that it is for all breech 1st babies

Round here there are a couple of specific MWs - one nhs and one IM you're advised to speak to if you want to birth a breech baby ad yes, few these data have the hands-on experience.

Ooh congratulations tat and lotsa, great news! And rake, hang in there, it can't be long now, surely?!?!?

Could anybody who's bf before or read up lots come to www.mumsnet.com/Talk/breast_and_bottle_feeding/1843025-3day-old-bf-how-long-each-feed please??

badguide - I haven't yet, but did have a really good breast feeding session at NCT and another from my independent midwife... Both used marbles as visual representations of baby's tunmmy size to basically say, don't worry about how much baby gets in the first week, as it won't need much, which really surprised me. If you google images for newborn stomach size, it says at three days they are only 1oz (27ml) which is tiny, I'm sure you're doing fine :)

Ps didn't comment on the bf page as I haven't tried yet so didn't want to get criticised for offering advice when I haven't been there!

DH has had a bit of a bust up with FIL on the phone today...

Neither of us had responded to Saturday's rude (well it came across as rude) email from them accusing us of not telling them what was going on or holding something back. He had a missed call from them yesterday, then FIL called today, started off with 'so, how are things with you?'. I know it sounds innocuous but none of us are the sort of people who phone just for a chat like that, so it was def a nag for "news". It went on a bit and there was apparently an abrupt end when FIL just said well we'll leave it there and put the phone down.

I'm not sure whether DH is actually sad about it or has just put it down to the usual frustrations of the way they are, i.e. self centred and thoughtless about how anyone else is perceiving a situation.

Sorry to post such a downer.

Badguider, I was thinking of you today. I remembered you were keen to feed. I think we both gave birth on the same day. How are you getting on? I feel like he is latching on well, the rugby ball position is working well for both of us. He just doesn't seemed satisfied by me after what I think has been a good feed, he falls asleep and 2 mins later he's rooting and unsettled. I just don't know what to do. I know his tummy is tiny but I'm worried I'm starving him and he's so precious. We had a fairly traumatic and very long labour. Resulting in forceps as my waters had been gone for so long, they would only give me 90 mins to push, if I'd had another hour I know I'd have had him out but had to do what was best. Poor little guy is very sleepy and prob has a very sore head!!! About to feed but will read you breast feeding post in the morning. Hope you have an ok night.

Badguider, just read it. You're doing amazingly well. Far better than us. I think I'm going to have to top up, really don't want to. Hoping my milk will come in tomorrow.

My poor boy is so sleepy I can't feed without us being skin to skin and a lot of tickling. It's no wonder, he's been through a lot.

I'm constantly feeding and expressing to try and get my supply going. I was in hospital for 60 hours, I got 4 and a half hours sleep, no wonder I don't have a good supply. I don't know what to do and what's best for my boy!

My phone app has just sent me an update to inform me that our baby has now been born!! Which is nice. However, I don't recall giving birth and can't seem to see a child anywhere!?

Ah flip - I am sure you're not starving him. He's programmed to want to suckle loads and loads. I think it's more an issue for us than them - when do we sleep?
You must be exhausted.
Have you spoken to anybody about topping up by syringe? Are you giving him your expressed bm? Are you getting much?

You are almost certainly not starving your baby flip! That's normal newborn behaviour and as long as you want to bf try not to worry and don't too up. Google kellymom for a fab website if evidence based info which always puts my mind at rest when I start to get anxious.

kellymom.com/bf/normal/newborn-nursing/

In feel a bit like that too flip, I know that DS was only born this morning, but he had a big feed from just before 9:30 until just after 9:50. Then only a 5 minute feed just after 12. He has woken up since then and cried, but he just keeps going back to sleep (until I put him in cot at least)

Lotsa - both mine hardly fed the first day. Keep stripping baby off and offering breast but then rest and try not to worry.

Getting no where with expressing but I will persevere. They gave him 20 mls of formula from a cup in hospital, I always knew it was on the cards due to GD and knew feeding was the only way to stabilise his blood sugar (which only took 1 dip over 24 hrs) I was using their hospital strength Medela and got no where, so retreated to the formula. Continued to offer the breast, he would latch, suck etc and his nappies were wet/dirty. I didn't get on well with the night staff, had no sleep and when they stood over my bed with a bottle, with teat, in the middle of the night telling me he was starving and had to feed I was so tired and emotional , I didn't put up much of a fight. Huge regreat. I knew I had to get out of there if I was to have any hope of breastfeeding. They wanted me to stay another night, I had to put up such a fight to get home. Things have improved at home, still not getting much sleep but I'm coping with that and I'm far more relaxed now. After a marathon feeding session yesterday and feeling like I was getting somewhere, then an evening of cluster feeding, he was still rooting and becoming fractious. We didn't have a great night (but he's so adorable I can forgive him) He's far more alert and less mucusy now, so today we should be able to feed on demand, rather than set timers and alarms and try to wake him to feed. I'm not ready to throw the towel in especially before my milk comes in but it has crossed my mind. Midwife coming today, hopefully I'll be reassured when he's weighed and checked. She's going to look at latch etc again. My nipples are torn to shreds and I'm very sore after the traumatic labour, it really doesn't help but DH is being an amazing tower of strength.

Thanks Jenni, I'll have a look at that, might just give me the nudge to keep going.

You need to see / speak to someone flip. Did they give you numbers you can call to speak to BFing counsellors with your discharge stuff?
I can confirm the getting fractious is normal too though: DS has a few hours most night/evenings where he cries like he's starving but won't latch on very easily. It's stressful but if he's latching more or less ok the rest of the time I know he's fine. Read the Kelly mom on fussiness, I was in tears the other night but reading about it calmed me down no end.

I still think you need RL help though. If you can't find a list of numbers let me know and I'll see if the ones I have are national ones.

And just in case: you might find the person coming to weigh etc isn't that clued up on BFing. As I said I was given a ticking off and the set line as to how long DS should have been feeding despite the fact he only lost 3.7% at 5 days! Don't let them make you feel bad and if they aren't helpful enough find someone else, preferably who only does BFing support...

Well done flip - you are doing brilliantly!!!
If its any reassurance my ds was "fractious" most of last night and its nothing to do with the availability of my milk (there's lots and I can hand express) or his latch which is fine when he wants to!)

We had some really horrible times when he was not hungry so I ended up giving him my pinkie finger to suck and I think we will buy a dummy today. But only offer it after he's eaten from both sides.

A dummy is unlikely to be for you in your circs but I just wanted to let you know that "fractious" doesn't always mean hungry. I am sure ds was not hungry last night.

Flip sending you and

Your experience with the hospital MWs sounds awful.

Have you thought about posting a thread on the BF / Bottle feeding board? There are some massively experienced and highly qualified people on that board. They can reassure or sign post you in the right direction for RL support.

Sorry if you already have.