January 2014 (Thread 7) - more excitement to come!

[Sultanajo]

The one where hopefully we are feeling less nauseous and knackered (although we develop hippo hands and feet due to the heat!), we are entering or are in our second trimester (phew!), we continue with 12 week scans and test results (ekkk!), we have 16 week midwife appointments and hear the heartbeat (OMG - aw!), we potentially see the beginnings of bumps and feel the first flutters of movement (wow!) and the 20 week scan for some is just around the corner!

Oh and we try to improve our diets after surviving on one food group during the first trimester!!!

Bring it on thread 7!!!

(pod hope I did you proud)!

Ooooo exciting! We sold have gone and got it fitted, I guess we probably can still go somewhere to get it checked. It was more getting the seat in and out that's the problem!

Oh penny, am glad you could see the funny side! And at least you have some time to practice.
DH is doing my head in. Since out BFP I've been sticking to a budget for food, toiletries and other household stuff. This means every week, things I'd like get knocked off the list so that essentials stay within the budget, making sure i use up what goes off first, shopping around to get best deals, all of which is fine and normal for me. But he keeps on waltzing in with extra bags of stuff from the supermarket... "I just fancied x". His argument is that we don't need to budget, but the budget is not a tight one, and he often ends up throwing stuff out. I know I'm being way over sensitive, and probably making him feel like im the shopping nazi and he can't buy himself a mars bar but ITS DOING MY HEAD IN!!! We both work full time so it's to like I have extra time on my hands to meal plan, budget and shop around either.
Sorry for the rant ladies.
Was wondering as well... When is everyone planning on taking their mat leave, and for how long?

ms avb I was wondering the same thing about mat leave...im going to try and work upto 36 weeks and take Annual leave before my mat leave.I only have about 3 weeks of annual leave though as I am part time.

I'm going to leave work at Christmas so around 20th. Due 22nd jan.

mrsavb that sounds really frustrating! Can u explain how you feel and why you feel what you do - is there a compromise somewhere?

I am hoping to go off at 34 weeks - start my mat leave two weeks before am due and tag four weeks holiday on before the mat leave. Also really hoping to take a year off.....

I'm leaving at christmas - we get the christmas break off as company holiday as site closes, so it won't eat into AL or mat leave. That should take me up to the 4th Jan ish, then a couple of weeks of leave til I'm due. I'm hoping to take 10 months, but it depends on childcare etc. getting a place in september is a lot easier than getting one in November, so that might make a difference.

Penny your car seat drama brough back memories - we did the exact same thing with DS's seat. Thank god we tried before we had to take him home from hospital ;)

Had 16 week appointment today - she did have a listen to the heartbeat . We took DS into the appointment, which the midwife was lovely about, and he was so chuffed to hear it. Really lump-in-throat family moment.

Wow love that is speedy, but I guess if you ditched a life in the great land of oz (coincindentally where I got engaged!) then he must be something alright

I am hoping to leave on 20th dec (i will be 37 weeks so might be a bit late), take the 6 days holiday I have left over xmas and then mat leave can start in jan. i really want a year off too, but dont think that will happen as dh is still out of work. Will def take normal mat leave though (my boss has been pondering to one of my collegues that she thinks ill be back after 3 months with dh not working. If she thinks I am going to miss the opportunity to be home with my child for as long as possible so I can come back to a rubbish job that I dont like she needs to think again!)

Obv i wont say that to her face as i will need my job kept available in case i return. You would think it would a sure thing with dh out of work but we will be getting rid of my car to save money so to go back to work would mean buying a new car so i can take bubs to childcare, plus paying for childcare, so might turn out that i dont earn much money at all so isnt worth going back to my job as hopefully dh will be back teaching by then. Might be better getting a part time job elsewhere or something.

I'm planning on taking 6 months then DH taking two. We're so chuffed that you can now share leave! We wanted to do 6 months each but we won't be able to afford it. When I tell people we're sharing leave they generally look at me like I've just landed from the moon, which is pretty depressing. Is anyone else planning on sharing leave? My dad worked from home for most of my childhood and I had such a close relationship with him, I am determined my kids will have the same. When my dad died so many of my friends commented, when they saw how close we were, that they barely knew their dads.

Planning on working up until the end of term (teacher), but with bub due on the 1st it might not be possible!

Toby I got married on the 11th of August! We were going to wait until our anniversary to announce it but weren't patient enough!

Tarka I did some research (after panicking for a while) and read about it developing around 28 weeks, so I'll try to calm down! Although I probably will still get my dad to check my sugar levels...

qumquat we are doing the same and sharing the leave- I'll take the first 6 months then DH between 4-6 months after that. It means he will be at home in Sept when DD1 starts school, which will be lovely for her too. We figured now you can we should, he'll never get the chance to do it again as we aren't planning on more DC after this one.

It will be tough financially but as I earn more than DP, if either of us are going to take more than 6 months off then it is better if we get my salary.

I think sharing the leave is a great idea. DH was a SAHD with dd1 from 7 months old until my mat leave when I had dd2. They have a fantastic relationship, it made it so much easier for dd1 when dd2 was born. She called him 'mummy-daddy' when she was little.

I hadn't heard about sharing leave I thought they just got 2 weeks. How does it work?

I got married on the 10th August!! Few of us have anniversary coming up soon then :)

All this talk of maternity leave made me laugh - I had my annual appraisal yesterday and my manager asked if I was planning to take any maternity leave! Err, no, I was planning to just pop the baby out during a coffee break in a meeting and then get back to my desk!

At the moment it looks as though I'll be staying at home, possibly for a few years. If I don't like it I always have the option of going back to work if I want to, which is great. I'm planning to finish around the 14th December to get ready for Christmas, my due date is the 6th.

Lovely to hear about all these fast weddings :) We booked ours yesterday and will be getting married on Halloween! We've only been together for 8 years..!

Working for home today as midwife is visiting for 16 week appointment. Very pleased as have had awful shooting pains on and off since Monday. Hopefully just round ligament though.

I know someone else who got married on 11th August :) It's quite the popular time!

Congratulations, Book :o It's easy, planning a quick wedding. Where are you doing it (if you don't mind telling!)?
What a knob your boss is! Have a lovely midwife visit.

Might be wrong, but I thought shared leave didn't come in til 2015? I mean on the same basis as mat leave, rather than if you're taking additional pat leave or taking it unpaid and/or have super flexible employers?
Like enjoying, my office closes for Christmas, so that's when I'm planning on leaving. I don't know if this is a bit silly/ optimistic to finish on the 23rd when I'm due in the 1st, but a lot of my friends have worked up til their due date, my job is not very physical, and if I'm not managing or not well, I'm sure I can negotiate to leave earlier or start mat leave early by going off sick. We haven't decided how long I'll take yet - employers are supposed to presume you'll take a year, then you can give notice to return early if you want to.
X

book congrats. I would agree that it is easier planning a faster wedding. You just get on with it and keep doing things. Someone at my work has been engaged for a year and has another year until the wedding. She is already fed up and bored of the whole thing as there is so much she is having to plan but she has to drag it all out and its too soon to finalise lots of things.

16 week midwife app today Very excited to hear the heartbeat. I am going to ask if we get to hear it, just in case they don't do it in my area. Am going to play the 'dh didn't get to come to my 12 week scan so this will be his first opportunity to see there is something there' I won't tell them about the sneaky 9 week scan we had, but technically that was still so early that it was just a blob so doesn't count!
Have warned him of all the questions I will be asking so that he doesn't get all embarrassed when I start talking discharge etc lol.

mrsa my sister said that they are supposed to assume you take a year unless you tell them otherwise, but I wasn't sure as my friend from work finished in december and work have told her that she has to decide by end of August if she wants to come back or take a year.
I think that they are proper pressuring her to decide. If they assume you are taking a year then it is probably less pressure as you just have to give a certain amount of notice to come back don't you so you can kind of leave it until you are ready to choose.

I plan to tell my work that I will be taking a year unless they hear from me otherwise.

MrsVDB - I'm on my phone but hopefully the following explains it:
www.gov.uk/paternity-pay-leave/overview

Basically after a certain point (6 months I think) mums can transfer the rest of their year to dads and the dad gets the same rights (stat mat pay, job held open etc). Mum has to go back to work (for at least a day, before using any annual leave etc).

They are bringing something even more flexible in at a later date (can't remember the difference - maybe it can start sooner than 6 months or not have to be taken in one big chunk).

We would have done it with DD1 but it hadn't come into effect yet and we were worried DH's work wouldn't keep a job open for him so it seemed a bit risky, so I took 8 months off then DD started nursery (which luckily she loved).

Shared parental leave doesn't come into play until April 2015 as far as I am aware... :-(

Hubby and I got married in April so this was a honeymoon baby - after over 3 years of trying it was such a nice surprise.

Have my 17 week midwife appointment today so we'll see how that goes as I was consultant care the last time so don't know what to expect.

Going out afterwards to get DD's school uniform. Where did the time go!?! I keep having to remind myself in a few months she won't be my baby anymore :-(

But then you'll have another baby AND a big girl mrsRA :)

toby, it will just be us and two witnesses at Ashford Register office. It is in the library building, which is a bit tragic as I am a librarian myself (although not there)! Partner is only doing it for legal reasons (how romantic!), but I've wanted to get married for ages, so I'm still pleased. I had a BIG wedding last time, so am happy with it being just us. What the hell am I going to wear to a Halloween wedding when I'm 30 weeks though?! Partner is saying he might do fancy dress

Ah, it'll be really easy then, book! The registry office in Ashford is a bit uninspiring but it does the job
We had to go there to do the pre-wedding formalities.

Book tart I got married 2 September 2 years ago and had dd on 22 October. Was also registry office, small affair with meal at lovely Italian after. Then had a hogroast BBQ at country park following day for friends and family, very informal and fun for all (they played rounders!). Anyway I wore a purple maternity maxi dress from next, lovely rich purple colour almost Grecian in style. I had a little tiara and a pretty crochet jacket/cardigan to cover my shoulders. So easy to dress up for ceremony and then next day easy to dress down too. Congratulations xx

Oh and I have anomaly scan on our 2nd anniversary. Hoping to get sister to look after kids so me and dh can sneak off for lunch after scan. May ask if we decide to find gender out, if they can pop it in envelope and we can open it at lunch...

I like the sound of your outfit bunt, I may shamelessly copy you :) Lovely idea about the gender reveal as well!