December 2013 - part 3

[Holly1977]

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1740732-December-2013-part-2

Starting yet another thread as us chatterboxes have filled up 2 already!

Jucy, I'm so sorry to hear your news. Big hugs, wish there was something more I could say.

Frouby, if you're feeling crap just fuck the housework off, I do! It'll keep.

I'm scared and excited in equal measures about the scan on Friday. Looking forward to seeing bean and being able to get on with things. But obviously scared of getting bad news like Jucy... 2 days, 1 hour and 50 minutes to go!

My friend has offered to be a birthing partner too. I may well take her up on it, I suspect she'll be more help than OH. And as I'm planning on having a home water birth and OH has already invited his bloody mum (!) think it'll be good to have a friend there. I'm not private at all, have zero issues with people seeing me naked (as my neighbours will tell you) and she's seen me throw up enough times from our party days (though never shit myself to be fair) that I'm not too fussed about that.

FFS. It's not enough that I'm concerned about the fucked up nuchal measurements they sent me, now I can't get an appointment with the MW. I am 16+1 and she's full this week for appointments. I'm supposed to have my 16 week appointment this week. I don't care that she's probably overstretched and underpaid, and they should have more mw's in the area, I just want a bloody appointment.

So frustrated. Anxiety about not feeling any movements (or barely any- not sure if I sometimes feel something or am imagining it) is now just going to get worse. If I have to wait another week to see her I'll go mad. And I BET she'll say they don't listen to the heartbeat in this area- I'm sure she said that last time due to them not wanting to worry you if they can't find one. I'd rather she at least tried!

My 16 week appointment was a bit of a nothing tbh, she didn't touch me or listen to hb, just talked. I'm 18+4 with DC2 and only feel occasional tiny movements, most of the time I think I've imagined it! Don't stress about things, I got all worked up first time round and a dr friend pointed out I'd have had other symptoms if all was not well with baby.

I have a meeting with the supervisor of midwives this afternoon for a 'debrief' of DS's birth and to begin planning for this time. So pleased, I desperately want (need!) to have a positive experience this time and I feel the only way of doing this is if I have faith in the HCPs supporting me, and have a plan in place early that's been made in conjunction with them. I also have an appointment with the consultant I wanted all along next week - my MW has spoken to her already and she's agreed to do her best to help me feel less anxious.

Frouby, that's a lovely way of looking at it :) I need to remember that when I'm feeling fat or grumpy or annoyed that I can't drink!

And Mumof2, that's rubbish! It just seems that doctors/ nurses/ receptionists/ midwives don't realise how important it is for us to have regular contact or at least a bit of reassurance from time to time.
I suppose it's just all so routine to them, but that doesn't excuse a complete lack of help or information...
I hope you manage to get something sorted soon. If all else fails, maybe try to make an emergency appointment and tell them that you'd rather not say why over the phone (that's the only way I managed to see my GP when I found out I was pg!)

I'm now 15 weeks and finally meeting my midwife for the first time this afternoon! It's taken so long to get this first appointment sorted so I really hope she's nice and makes me feel like it was worth the wait...!

Also, so glad to hear that I'm not the only one struggling to squeeze into my old clothes or find any nice maternity clothes. Up until now I've been living in the same 3 pairs of leggings and a few different tops, but everything seems to have got a lot tighter overnight! Think I'm going to have to raid the shops soon and try to find some nice maternity dresses in a bid to survive this heatwave!

Itsliz, the best thing I have bought over the weekend was a stripey dress from Tescos. Non maternity, t shirt style with strappy sleeves in navy blue and white stripes. Was reduced from £6.00 to £3.00 in the sale, non maternity but I just wore a pair of maternity leggings underneath.

It was long enough to cover my arse and hips, fell nicely across my bump, enough to say I'm pregnant but covered up huge boobs as well. So my plan for the rest of my maternity tops over the summer is to look for stuff like that in the holiday clothes departments of Matalan and Asda and Tesco and just buy some more maternity leggings. Felt quite nice in it yesterday and friend asked me if they did them in non maternity section too, so must have looked OK.

Mumof2 try not to worry sweetie. Its frustrating I know and we can't help but stress a bit but I have my 16 week appt today and will report back. I feel movement (or what I think is movement) occasionally but them fret for a few days until I feel something else. But my placenta is anterior so will be muffled anyway. Like your friend said if something was wrong by this stage I think there would be some pretty gory symptoms going on.

I think being pregnant is broken down into stages of worry lol. First we have the are we/aren't we situation. Then the BFP and sheer terror for the first 12 weeks until we go for our first scan. Then we fret to the 16 week appt, then the 20 week anomoly scan brings its own set of terrors! Moving on past the 20 weeks scan we start to think about the birth, the baby being OK when born, us being OK when we've given birth, being OK with our chosen feeding method whether FF or BF, then coping with a first baby or slotting other DC's around a new one. Phew, its no wonder we can't sleep at night!

But think about the stats. If we have seen the heartbeat at 12 weeks there is a 99.7% chance (I think if I remember that rightly) of delivering a perfectly healthy baby. We are past the worse bit now and moving towards the home straight!

Oh, and I'm a bit pissed off as well though I know its completely irrational to be pissed off. SIL had her baby in June, I got my BFP in april and told pretty much straight away. So had to share the first part of my PG with her on the home straight. Found out yesterday my sister is PG too. Only 5 weeks so early days but will have to share the rest of my Pg with her. Am pleased for her as they have been trying for about 6 months and I know she was getting worried but feel a bit pissed off that I won't be the only one PG now. Completly irrational and very selfish I know. But I am irrational and riddled with hormones so think its allowed. And pissed off for my baby too who will be the youngest for such a short period of time. Though it will be nice to have a baby the same sort of age just up the road when they are older.

But am still pissed off lol.

Mumoftwo, don't worry about no movement yet. I'm 19 wks tmr and have only felt "definite" movement in the last wk.

Fingers crossed you get an appointment soon
x

Oooh that sounds fab, thanks for the advice!
Sounds exactly like the sort of thing I'm after at the moment, too - I still feel like I look fat rather than pregnant, so anything that covers up my bump without making me look too huge is a definite plus (especially at that price!)
Looks like I'm off to raid the supermarkets tonight then

I think we all got up on the same side of the bed this morning. I had to laugh as I was reading the posts as I feel the EXACT same way.

mum they gave me a mw appointment for this wednesday. but they gave it to me 6 weeks ago and told me someone would call to confirm and they never did. i feel like i'll show up and they'll be like: who are you? also i'm preemptively pissed off about the fact that I have this feeling they wont even try to listen to the HB if I do get to see someone.

frouby I'm also not hating being pg, but like you, I really miss the drinking (was at a friend's weeding this w-e and it was in the south of france in a vineyard / chateau and I couldn't drink the wine it was torture), and HATE this effing hayfever that I've never had before and I feel like it's steeling what should be my 'glowing' day. the whole glowing thing is a farce.
I'm excited to be pregnant but i've now really started to feel fat. it's not just my belly, it's my ass, and yes, I HATE MY BOOBS. they are already so big usually and they just got to a ridiculous size. that's what everyone talked about all weekend at the wedding. i already dont enjoy being centre of attention, but when my boobs are, i just want to dig a whole in the ground and bury myself. uuuuuuuuuuuuugh

itsliz i also can't seem to find clothes that hide the monsters but don't look like I'm wearing a bag... i'm going to order a bunch from asos and return what doesn't fit I think...

At least it's nice and sunny! perfect day to be stuck in an office (sarcastic).

rant over.

I have the opposite to your weather frustration Rose - it's overcast and generally dull (even foggy at times) here, I'm off work today, it's been SCORCHING AN GLORIOUS all weekend and I've done 2 13hr shifts, it's been hotter than hell at work! Then tomorrow's meant to be 27 degrees, but I've got to take DS for a minor op (sob!) so will be trapped in a red hot ward from 8am until possibly Wednesday tea time!

There were a couple of people in the same boat as me Christening present wise a couple of pages back and just wondered what people thought about buying my nephew the brio my first train set - it means he won't be able to play with it for a little while (he's 7 months) but it's something he will use growing up. I don't want to get a moneybox or something like that because I think he'll end up with a couple of them. Was also going to get made up one of those christening plaques with his name & date & church etc?

So glad to only be 4 months and not 8 months in this heat! Hope everyone had a good weekend

Is anyone else really itchy? No idea if it's normal or not and I don't want to call my mw again

Futterby I'm a little itchy sometimes on my back now you come to mention it!

I was in town at lunchtime and topshop had a sale on and there were a few nice maternity bits and pieces. Didn't have time to try on and came back to the office to order online and nothing is there! They have a nice crem dress with black spots (a la Kate Middleton) which was reduced to £15 and maternity jeans, few tops and dresses.. I wouldn't pay full price for them but might be tempted in the sale.. Hopefully still there tomorrow!

Futterby if you are itchy call the M/w hun. Probably just a heat rash or something but there is something dodgy you can get when PG that makes you violently itch.

I'm itchy though too. Itchy back which DP informs me is red and flaky and the itchiest, scratchiest nipples in the world. And an itchy belly. And an itchy buttock as well. Which I have just scratched absent mindedly in Tesco's whilst choosing a lettuce pmsl. Hope no one was watching!

Been for my 16 week appt. All good and fine. Heard the HB though it took a minute to find it. Was nice to hear and very reassuring. Those that live in areas where it isnt standard if you want to hear it ask the MW. They may still say no but if you assure them that you won't be worried if they can't then they may do. And if they can't find it, turn on the waterworks and demand a scan!

Was a short and sweet appt though. Asked how I was, felt tummy, listened to HB and tested a wee sample. No bloods, no weighing, nothing nasty at all.

Not got another one until 28 weeks now. 20 wk scan next, then M/w appt, then growth scan at 28 weeks too, 32 weeks and 36. So longest gap is between 20 wk scan and nxt M/w appt. Seems a long time to me but I can phone if I am at all worried or anything.

Just come out of meeting with the supervisor of midwives and I feel SO much better! She's apologised for everything that went wrong last time and acknowledged all of the points I raised. She agreed the way I was treated was entirely unacceptable. She says between my MW, DH, the consultant and me there'll be a detailed birth plan for every possible eventuality in place by 30 weeks, that whatever I decide I want to happen re pain relief, delivery method, etc. etc. WILL happen, and she's given me her personal mobile no to call if at any point I feel things aren't going the way I want or that I'm not being listened to. Have consultant appointment next week, but the relief already is immense!

I like the train set idea MrsShrubs that would be lovely

That's BRILLIANT feather I'm delighted for you. What a relief!!

ladies with itchy skin. I was very itchy I think it's because my skin was stretching and dry. I got this cream last time I went to the spa for a treatment. It's safe for everywhere (including nipples). It feels amazing. I'm not itchy anymore. www.cowshedonline.com/udderly_gorgeous_maternity/udderly_gorgeous_leg_foot_treatment-c179319p164987.html

sorry that was the wrong one
try this
www.cowshedonline.com/udderly_gorgeous_maternity/udderly_gorgeous_stretch_mark_balm-c179319p164980.html

Thanks takingthestairs

Glad the MW appointments are going well & featherbag you feel a lot more reassured! I think my MW told me to book in again for a 24 week appointment though? Maybe it's different areas doing different times?

Hi all. Had my anomaly scan today. All is well and Rufus is a girl! Which made 7 yo DS have a tantrum when we got home and told him, and he ran away from home (all the way to the park next door). No midwife appointments here between booking appointment at 10 weeks and 25 weeks! Am 19 weeks today, so 6 weeks before my next MW appointment.

Mumof I only had my 16 week midwife appt last fri when I was nearly 18 weeks and she managed to panic me asking if I'd felt any movement... The reassurance scan on sat showed the placenta at the front cushioning movements.... So don't worry if you are not feeling anything yet (I'm still unsure whether I am feeling movements or wind... Seemed to be at the side today and under my ribs which I'm sure the baby isn't big enough to make it there yet!)...

Don't worry I'm sure it will all be ok...

Brilliant news Feather!

Congratulations on your baby girl to be Loki

I've just got the notification of the next sale slot, there are some really sweet and different baby clothes reduced though not much neutral stuff. I think I might just order the things that I like and return the ones I don't need after the scan!

Thanks for the advice everyone :)

Fantastic Feather!!

Congratulations Loki! Glad to hear your scan went well :)

thanks for all the reassuring replies! has made me feel a lot better. I do think I'm being irrational- but as we all know, it's hard not to be irrational sometimes when pregnant!

bonkers that' good that you got reassurance- I am just annoyed that if my placenta is on the front and preventing me feeling anything - I wish the sonographer had told me at my 13 wk scan. With both my previous pregnancies I felt a lot after 13/14 weeks, this time hardly anything so I guess there's a good chance it is anterior or whatever they call it.

Loki so envious of you finding out! Glad the scan went well. We're not going to find out the sex but I SO want to.

I think the reason I'm so negative is I have this (yes, again irrational) fear that I've got two healthy gorgeous kids and so this one won't be healthy. Almost like I'm being greedy having another and why should things go smoothly a third time? Completely mad thinking really but I can't help it! You'd think after 2 I'd be more laid back!

oh well, like some of you have said, I'm sure all is fine (I will keep repeating this over and over in my hormone flooded head!)

feather that is great!

ahhh loki i'm so happy for you congrats!!
so jealous of all of you - i'm still 4 weeks away from the anomaly scan, but mw appointment coming up on wed. hoping for some reassurance there!

Feather glad your meeting went well

loki congratulations

I had my 20 week scan today, all seemed well but she was unable to complete all the checks as baby moved its head into my pelvis and although she adjusted the bed, lowering my head and bringing my legs up, baby wouldn't budge. So, we have to go back for another scan at 23 weeks. She reassured me that everything seems fine but still slightly worried, although she warned me pre-scan that as I'm 19 weeks+4 it can be more difficult to see everything than when baby is over 20 weeks. The pictures we have are lovely though and we saw a perfect little foot which was amazing.

And, we found out that we're expecting a boy