Graduated Elerberries - 30+ and expecting DC1 (thread no 4)

[HazleNutt]

Welcome old and new graduates and everybody else who wants to join us, elderly primigravidas aka Elderberries.

Oh, and please don't be impressed with this laidback attitude, I have the fear that it's only temporary, and that some kind of breakdown is around the corner for me, when I finally acknowledge the fact that I'm living in a building site, and definitely have a rather scary/painful episode ahead of me, regardless of which 'exit' the baby uses...

Maybe it's a sign you're nearly ready Janey? Or maybe it's just some weird leave of senses. Either way, I'd enjoy it for now, reality may be lurking round the corner fingers crossed it's gone on holiday a while longer

Ridiculously, one of the reasons I was so annoyed was that in my head, I'd seen the 'extra' scan as a positive (tho slightly dreading thought of another dildocam episode), and as some sort of consolation for everything else. Having that taken away was a little like rubbing salt in I think.

Bloody pregnancy hormones

Completely understand that. Scans are so lovely - somehow makes it all more tangible and more 'real' as if the bloody great big belly isn't enough

I have an additional scan tomorrow to check size/position/growth etc and have been looking forward to it so much - if they cancelled it I would be ridiculously gutted. Shame they won't just given you one anyway, to be nice!

I totally understand Brave - all this worrying and things you didn't do and for nothing really. Even though it is good news, of course.

I think it's a bit too late to start worrying about the statistically 25% chance of splitting from baby's Dad. It's not like we can change our minds now! Unless you are a thick Chinese woman in which case you can attempt to solve the problem by flushing your baby down the toilet and then pretending it was an accident when you get found out.

Brave I feel on your behalf that you were given duff info. How frustrating. It's just run-of-the-mill everyday stuff for them but it's a massive thing for you and you deserved to be given the correct information.

Janey I am completely envious of your laid back attitude in the face of incompetent builders adversity. I am feeling increasingly anxious that I am 6 days away from being 'term' and will be having a baby in a maximum of 40 days (assuming 2 weeks over) but probably less. OMFG Aaarrrggghhh, how did this happen? I'm not ready!

But, 1 working day left

1 working day left! Wow Cavort I'm at that!

Thanks for justifying my bratty strop Hazle and Cavort. I feel a bit better now - I think it helps when people around me have said (inc you wise ladies) - 'totally sucks that they told you that and it was all rubbish'.

It also happened to coincide with a moment of utter despair of 'I don't want to have a little boy', instigated by seeing that junior's heartbeat was measured at between 130-146 yesterday (ie 'boy' heartrate in old wives tale) compared to usual 140+, followed by an 'i don't want a little girl either', which led to 'omg I'm going to be such an awful mother'...

Wasn't the best of days

Am now back to usual peace with the fact that it may well be a boy and DP and his family will be smug that they're 'right'.

Ooh hope your scan goes well tomorrow Janey - I am now living vicariously through you

Am I right in thinking you're in Team Green? If so, are you tempted to cave and find out???

So taught my last class today, everybody was so nice, wishing me luck, but I just loved the reactions whenever I answered the "so, when are you due?" question. The reaction, without fail, was "Three weeks!?!?!"

Hazle we need an up-to-date bump photo of you so we can all marvel and be similarly agog that you have been doing what you've been doing up til now!

We have our 12 week scan tomorrow, cross all your fingers for us. I am quite nervous about it despite us having had a good early scan. It feels like tmw is a massive milestone and once we get that out of the way we can get out of this 1st-trimester Groundhog Day and start to get to grips with looking forward.

I realised that I have also in my head been thinking that if my scan is fine tomorrow then that will also be the end of all my first-tri symptoms. Extremely wishful thinking given that today I wretched violently all the way from the bus-stop to my front door on my way home, leaving a trail of gob, bile and sick all through the park. Luckily I live in a part of London where such revolting behaviour isn't particularly out of the ordinary.

Janey I recognise your zen - I have had moments of that, with DP amazed by how i am suddenly chilled out about everything, unfortunately this is still interspersed with periods where I get wound up about every small thing.

Brave I would have had a meltdown in your situation too - how unfair!

all fingers crossed Quod!

I have my fingers and toes crossed for you Quod. Let us know how you get on x

As a special treat for my last day at work, my body decided to ramp up the BH from barely noticeable to fucking painful this morning at 4am. I seriously thought it was the start of actual labour at one point. The baby seemed to be extra active during the contractions - I wonder if that's the same in real labour? They lasted for a few hours but seem to have stopped now but means I have been awake since 3.45am so today is now going to be a very grumpy one. I also think what I am now classing as agony will be downgraded to a 0.1/10 on the agonyometer after real labour.

Absolutely everything crossed for you quod. Good luck, will be thinking of you. Let us know when you have chance how it went.

Cavort - wowzers. I've had a couple of painful ones but nothing like that - maybe it is the start of something for you! Or maybe I'm just a first time mum getting over excited.... But sounds very different to any BH I've experienced so far. Maybe you're going to get first place!

Thanks -scan not til late afternoon so I will update you all when it's done.

poor cavort - I think I've had some BH now but they certainly haven't been painful.

I had another doc appointment this morning, am apprently 1 cm dialated, so shouldn't be surprised if the baby decides to come in the next 2 weeks. (or, on the other hand, the 1 cm could mean absolutely nothing).

DH is getting ridiculously excited and is, apparently, nesting - 'What do you mean there's nothing else to assemble? There must be something? Ok, will install the car seat then'

Everything crossed for you Quod...

Mega ouch Cavort! Were they definitely BH or could they have been stretchy dehydration cramps (ie like a calf cramp, but in uterus)? I keep getting these when I don't drink enough water and they hurt loads.

Had an interesting night with approximately 90 minutes of sleep - due to a combination of horrendous heartburn (had three top-ups of gaviscon), and being completely wide awake as a result of the news that our four-weeks ahead of us pregnant friends are no longer pregnant - they had their son this week - four weeks early!!

They're all ok apparently (no details yet), he's 5lb something and fine, but I can't get it out of my head that 'hold the phone, babies come early!!!' and swaying between hope they're ok and it wasn't too stressful to omfg what if my waters go at my desk.

Huuuge reality check!

Don't know about them but I think I'm a little in shock!

Also had a hilarious trip round Tesco last night whereby I was struck by cramp in my toes so badly I had to keep stopping. Was really quite painful but all I could do was laugh each time I ended up stock still in the middle of the aisle, bent forward with my knee bent, trying to prise the toes back into place.

Must. Drink. More. Water. Today.

Hope it all goes ok Quod, I'll be thinking of you this afternoon.

I'm very about it being your last day Cavort, I'm on a countdown now, by the time I've taken the flex they owe me I reckon my two weeks is actually going to amount to about 7 days in the office.

Lol at your nesting DH Hazle! How exciting! So the race is on... who will be the first Baby Elderberry?

Brave I suppose they could have been non-BH dehydration cramps but I really am drinking gallons at the moment so I doubt it, although most of what I'm drinking seems to be retained by my wrists and ankles. The pain was right accross the front of my bump, quite high up and lasted about 5-10 seconds every 10ish minutes. Not so much as a twinge now, I feel absolutely fine apart from tired.

Good news on the dilation Hazle, it's all coming together. And bravo for your DH sorting everything out ready - my DH is but only after nagging.

Oooh I'm so excited for you all & it seems so long away for me to wait too. I can't remember if I told you this but my friend went into labour at a work conference when her baby was early! She thought the labour pains were food poisoning & her waters broke when she was sitting on the toilet. So you never know Cavort...

FX for you today Quod. I cannot wait for 12 week scan as it just seems like such a big deal & the magic number.

Frog when is your 12 -week scan? Feels like ages away and time just does not move, right? But don't worry, that will change and the last weeks, or actually last months are a blur.

1cm? Wow. I was thinking, knowing you hazle and your superwoman status, you'll prob get to about 7cm dilated without even noticing!

Just had my scan. Bit rubbish tbh vs 20 weeks as you can't really see anything. But at 34+3 is 5lb 15oz already?! Seems like quite a lot to me really.... Otherwise all good. Has long legs like me and thankfully seemingly a normal sized head, unlike lots of folk in my family!

Glad your scan went well Janey - did you hold out on the sex or did you already know

I'd take the weight estimate with a pinch of salt tbh, they're renowned for being wildly inaccurate. But if it is that weight, then it may be down the long legs!

No idea when 12 week scan will be Hazle as not heard a peep from the midwife yet re a booking in appt. It should be the first week in July by my calcs (which should be accurate as I'm a good berry I temped etc so know exactly when I ovulated etc) but I've got a private one booked next Thurs when I think I'll be 8+3 & I they can confirm that I'm right or wrong then! I'll chase the GP surgery if not heard anything from midwife by end of next week.

janey 7 cm at this stage would be a bit much anyway, apparently 1-3 cm is normal during the last weeks of pregnancy. Will see (in a few weeks) how far I get before screaming for pain relief.

Made a mistake yesterday asking my mum how long her labours were. 24h with me and 48 with my sister, great . I am quite glad there are epidurals available nowadays.

Lol Hazle - thank the lord for epidurals indeed! I asked my mum once about my labour and she thought that was an overly personal question so I left it there! The only thing I do know is that she remembers being embarrassed afterwards because her midwife was one of my Nan's best friends (ie my dad's mum) and my mum claims to have 'educated' her with some new swear words!

And she's been cursing me ever since

I did find out though that she breastfed me for a year, so I asked if she'd be willing to help me (which I think she was very flattered about!).

First pics of tiny early baby have appeared on Facebook and not only is he really very cute, but mum looks very calm and relaxed and not at all like she's just produced a baby am very chuffed for them.

Ok folks so news from the womb is that we have a very wriggly, very normal looking baby in there. Downs risk under 1/7000 and bang on for dates - EDD 15/12. We can finally be excited!