Graduated Elderberries (numero 3)

[BraveLilBear]

Welcome back oh graduated elderberries. Let us discuss the delights of being over-30 first-timers with google obsessions

Pleeeease tell me you get your name from your usually hairy legs Purple...

so I'm not the only one

That's annoying Alex - I'm the same, very rarely mention anything voluntarily and if something comes up I'll answer politely before changing the subject to work asap.

The near colleagues aren't so much of a problem, it's the ones I don't work with much/are externals/are much more senior that I find more awkward. People are generally very nice about it all, I just feel uncomfortable talking about personal stuff to randoms apart from online, it seems

Haha, no Bear, sorry, but I admit I was a pretty hairy monster before pregnancy, I used to shave my legs virtually every day my hair is just so dark I look stubbly otherwise so I've quite enjoyed not looking like an ape for a change.

That would have annoyed me too Alex - I try not to talk about baby things at work as my boss has fertility problems so I feel very uncomfortable about it all.

In other news, I saw the consultant this morning, went ok but didn't really like everything she had to say which was, as expected, they will induce me at 40 weeks and not let me go over even though my bloods are ok and that she advises I should give birth at the hospital. Given that this is based on, even by her own admission, no real evidence or research I'm inclined to ignore her advice and have the MLU or home birth I wanted. I just keep reminding myself that they can't MAKE me do what they want and that consultants are notorious for wanting to intervene and no doubt the midwife will say I'd be absolutely fine to have what I want. It has made my head all a bit spinny though and I've got 4 weeks to make my mind up as by the time I see the consultant again she wants to plan it all.

I am furry if I don't take radical action on a regular basis. I have a real life nickname to do with bears. And I like cuddles.

I do not walk around in my birthday suit in public

Oh Purple that sounds very head-spinny I'd definitely get a second opinion from the midwives when you see them next - can you phone for advice if you can't see them before next consultant appt?

I'd definitely be wanting some more info too - why induce at 40 weeks just for the fun of it?

Was kind of hoping that your hair was naturally purple in a Monsters Inc kinda way... That would be awesome though no doubt very timeconsuming and annoying

purple that does sound daft! I am opting for the hospital which is about a 45 minute drive away....just incase. My best friend is a doctor an said she would kill me if I opted for the MLU which is about 15 mins away. I just want to be sure that a doc is there if I need one. Especially as it's my first. I'm a worry wart I know.

My boss has also started telling people, but only suppliers not clients. I got in yesterday and one of our printers was here and he congratulated me, was odd...nice but odd as I'd not said anything.

Fortunately I've got a midwife appt and seeing the midwife from the antenatal class before next consultant appt so I can ask them their opinion, I'm pretty sure they're going to see it my way.

The MLU is in the next town to the hospital, you get one to one care from a midwife there unlike the hospital where they're caring for lots of women at once so the consultant saying I need the hospital so I can have constant monitoring doesn't make sense to me. If anything starts to look iffy at the MLU they blue light you to the hospital (maybe 10 minutes given the sirens?) where you then jump the queue ahead of anyone already at the hospital because oddly, the person coming in by ambulance takes precedence. I just can't see a real reason not to.

The induction at 40 weeks as standard seems to be 'just in case' fact is they don't know all that much about this illness so there seems to be an awful lot of just in case rather than facts.

What a day! I CAN NOT FECKIN WAIT TO FINISH WORK IN 3 WEEKS!!! That is all.

Oh no! What did they do? Did you not just unleash the pregnant lady rage at them to scare them in to leaving you the hell alone?

Just a combination of internal politics, high workload and technological failure meaning I very nearly missed a deadline and the fact that I can't really be arsed any more. They all know me as a bit of a ball breaker anyway so pregnant lady rage wouldn't make any difference. If anything they probably think i've mellowed

I've treated myself to a bottle of Fanta and eaten a 150g bag of Jelly Babies all to myself so internal peace has now been restored

And DH has said he's going to buy us a nice big new telly for all the hours I will spend with my arse glued to the sofa nursing a newborn.

Cavort I had a shit day too in trying to be incredibly efficient I ended up with a supid amount of jobs live at once. Heaps of paperwork! I've got 17 jobs which need invoicing this month already.....not fun as I hate invoicing. Plus my boss keeps whining about his workload and giving me extra. I would have LOVED a nice cold cider this evening but alas its a while till I can have one of those! Only 6 months to go.....eeeek.
We are going to a friends 30th tomorrow night which means heaps of drunk people and little sober me driving us home at 2am....doh. Oh and (warning very girly comment) all my clothes make me look like a lard arse!

Sorry your day was shit as well Mother

I am also going out on the tiles tomorrow night possibly wearing a tent. I found in the earlier stages that wearing something tight and fitted was much more flattering than trying to disguise it with baggyness, although I know exactly what you are saying. Once that little paunch starts arriving there's no escaping that lardy feeling even though nobody else can probably even tell.

So whoever it was who warned about the unproductive vomming taking them by surprise when it suddenly became productive, thank you - I narrowly avoided a disaster today when an alarm bell went off in my head thanks to those wise words!

A question for those of you with dogs: Before getting pg, we had been planning to FINALLY get a dog now we have moved to our own place with a garden. I have always had dogs growing up and we regularly dog-sit a friend's whippet for a week or two at a time (who is here snoozing on my feet as I type) so I know the work involved. However, now being up the duff I am wondering whether it's just a really bad idea trying to fit that in before the baby arrives. Thoughts? I wouldn't be after a puppy - I'm after something like my dog-sittee, an easy-going small adult rescue dog. I had convinced myself it would all be too much after some people warned me off the idea, but having her here now and her not being any trouble at all, I can't really see how much more complicated it would make life, and it would guarantee that I got out of the house everyday (we live next to a park). Am I deluded?

Quod you still have quite a while to go to due date, don't you? While I personally would not try to take a puppy and have a baby at the same time, I think an older rescue dog should be doable. You would have enough time to train him before the baby arrives.

Of course, baby is a big change so it is certainly more reasonable to wait until the baby is here and then see if you still have time and energy for a dog. But I've always had dogs as well, so I understand the need. (currently have 2 of mine and one we're dogsitting sleeping all over the place)

Not deluded at all, loads of people have dogs and babies. Our Labrador cross will be just under a year old when baby arrives and I really don't envisage it being any kind of problem. In fact I am looking forward to our dog walks with DD in the pram or sling. I think having a dog at the same time as a baby is a good idea because you are likely to spend more time at home during the pre-school years so the dog won't be left alone all day during the working week.

Yeah I think it's perfectly doable as well but it's all the 'dog people' that have replied (I've got two big dogs) so I suppose we're not likely to be the ones who think its a crazy idea. If you wanted a puppy I might think you were a bit mad mind

Oooh you could get a rescue greyhound or something lovely docile gentle dogs in need of a good home, wonder if I can trade my two crazy hell hounds in for one?

Thanks folks - I did ask in the Doghouse and the answers were mostly weighted very heavily in the 'you'd be mad' category, a point of view I understand but I think that there are a lot of people there who work in rescue and see how many dogs get given up once babies come along, so are wary about it. I am thinking along your logic Cavort - it's a time when you are going to be at home loads so will be there for the dog.

Purple I would def go for a greyhound if I had a car (my last dog was a lurcher) but I need something small enough to take on the tube/bus. This here little whippet is very easily transportable...

I had some of my fake fizzy wine from tesco instead. Its actually quite nice.

Clingy clothes make me feel paunchy baggy clothes make me feel like a sack...I thought a peplum (spelling?) dress would be the answer, tried one on and I looked AWFUL!

I also own a pooch and think before bubs would be best as you want pooch settled and in a routine while you have a routine, if you get it after bubs arrives it might be a bit confusing for pooch and you might find it tries to compete for attention etc. If its already assured of its place in the family you should be fine

I understand your need for a pooch though! We have a dog, a cat, 2 fish ponds and a fish tank....so we are an animal friendly household. I love my furry friends. I would go for a dog around 3+ years old, should be a bit calmer by then, puppies are mental (as I'm sure you know) my hound from hell is about 20 months now and is finally calming down! Thank god!

Ohhh I love whippets quod! We had one at puppy class so cute and clever!

A lot of people seem to be very anti dogs and children altogether, I don't get it myself but I say that as someone who was brought up with dogs.

Has anyone else got the speach about the dangers of leaving the baby alone with a cat? Ive had it 3 times from different people...seriously? My grouchy cat will probably move out when we bring bubs home, hes still not forgiven us for getting the dog!
I do not see him curling up with baby, the only personal he lets hug him is me, he doesnt even like my OH

Its really important to me that our kids are brought up with animals, but my MiLs first question when she found out we were expecting was to ask if we were getting rid of the dog. Made me a bit angry, this is the dogs home too. Shes a minx but shes harmless.

Oh yes the 'cats smother babies' hysteria, I've had to bite my tongue through that lecture from people who don't know what they're feckin talking about a few times and my MIL did exactly the same, we told her the happy news and her first response was 'are you getting rid of the dogs?' Silly cow. I'd get rid of OH sooner than my dog.

I don't have a dog but we do have 3 cats. I had 2 & DP had 1 so that made 3 when we moved in. I think it's the milky smell that attracts cats to babies but as long as you either keep door shut or get a cat net I don't see it as a problem. My cats are my babies!! They're not keen on SS so the baby may well push mine over the edge too mother.
Just had a lovely evening with instadiffing friends (5 kids between 2 of them plus another pg one). So hard to keep up the fiction that I had to stay sober to drive from station when in reality I could have arranged it otherwise. Then another single friend started talking about freezing eggs as she was running out of time then got absolutely smashed & I had to get on the tube with her stone cold sober - aaa argh.