Graduated Elderberries (thread 2)

[Cavort]

Oops, seems we ran out of room without noticing!

cavort I think I would need to work for my sanity too, I like adults too much to spend my life without adult conversation.

I think I will give that book a wide berth Brave.

I have broken out in eczema-like blotches on my chin and forehead today without any logical explanation (I don't have eczema). No recent new toiletries or cosmetics to blame so I conclude it can only be related to pregnancy. Looks-wise, today has not been the greatest

Just imagine 3 years mat leave. 3 years!!!

I think in an ideal world I'd like to work part-time, then at least I'd be spending more time with baby than at my desk. But that ain't gonna happen.

I also think it particularly sucks that 'the fun part' of babies is when they start doing stuff at around 6 months... after all the mum's, who've spent months catering to feeding needs and dirty bottoms and little else, have gone back to work.

Part time would be lovely, I agree. Unfortunately would never happen with my job or a similar role. And moving to something different AND going part time would mean such a massive drop in salary I'd imagine that it would be impossible. Damn it.
I MIGHT be able to persuade them to let me work from home one day a week, we shall see. However, to be able to work, I'd still need to have childcare. I guess it would mean though that I could work through 'lunch', and given the lack of commute, I'd have longer with DS/DD/whatever it is than on a normal day.

Oh Cavort, it's nice to know that you might be skinny but that you too are developing a face as leporous and poxy as mine. I haven't got any 'spots' but between the red spider veins and the random brown blotches (look a bit like liver spots) I'm not looking my most attractive (and yes, I DID mean to be so rude and I bet you don't look as revolting as me anyway)

Janey, I've had almost the exact same comments from several people about how humongous I am. I'd ask your hitman for a 2 for 1 deal except one of the worst perpetrators is my mother so I can't really have her shot as tempting as it is.

I'm thinking about going back to work just two or three days a week, not because we've got loads of money but I don't like my job and it doesn't pay well anyway. OH would rather I didn't go back at all I think but I feel like I need some sense of financial independence. Who knows though, I may change my mind once the baby is here?

I woke myself up screaming last night (and OH!) with horrendous agonising cramp in my calf muscle. A few hours later I woke up screaming and it was the other leg. Strangely it was the screaming that woke me up not the pain, weird huh? No doubt this is some all new 'this week's special' pregnancy hell.

I am also considering asking for part-time initially, but I'm not sure how well this will be received at work and I don't plan on mentioning it until I'm ready to go back (if I go back... I could always leave after maternity and look for something else part-time if they say no). I will get maternity leave out of the way before thinking about that though - 11 (ish) weeks left to work!

Yup, tiny babies are cute but really aren't that interesting are they?

I think part time is only possible if you have set working hours and are only expected to do what you can during those hours. With my job, part time would just mean that I'll do the same amount of work (incl. in my free time) and get less money.

Well they can either offer me part time hours or stick it frankly, if it were a career or a job I loved or was passionate about that would be one thing but it's not, it's a fairly crappy job which I am vastly over qualified for but have become stuck in due to the area I live in and the state of the economy. Not enough love for it or pay to drag me away from my baby 5 days a week!

There's no reason why I couldn't do my job part time and I work for a Local Authority so they should, theoretically be reasonable about accommodating flexible working BUT my manager's manager is famously difficult about women going off and having babies so we shall see...

My current job is not one which would be suited to part-time hours, but my company is currently undergoing a massive overhaul, which coincidentally includes changing my role (and everyone else who does the same as me) to one which (IMO) could be considered for part-time so I will wait and see.
It's strange now thinking I could be going back there because the inevitability of having to leave my job was a big part of my anguished decision making process when deciding to TTC. It's not like I love it that much but it's easy enough and quite well paid (except for their wanky minimal maternity provision).
Disclaimer: my naive opinions and ideals of wanting to go back to work are subject to change after baby is born and I decide I can't bare to leave her

Ok sorry in advance for the icky message. Me and OH just dtd and I had pale pink cm afterwards......should I be worried?

I wouldn't worry too much, if you get sustained bright red bleeding get it checked out but otherwise it's fairly common to have some minor bleeding early on, I had 3 separate small bleeds and everything is fine.

I believe it's very common to bleed after sex in early pregnancy Mother so probably nothing to worry about.

I had pink CM at around 6 weeks which my MW later said could have been the embryo implanting further. This is apparently fairly common at around 6-8 weeks.

I also had unexplained bright red bleeding at 9 weeks and had to go for a scan to check everything was ok (which thankfully it was).

Your body is just trying to keep you on your toes

Oh no mother that sounds worrying - but as the others have said, it's fairly common early doors. It can also be down to the cervix being extra sensitive - when I was on the pill I had cervical ectropion (also erroneously called erosion) which meant that cells from the inside of the cervix sometimes grew onto the outside surface and were prone to bleeding. This is very common in pregnancy I believe as the same hormones are in play.

So probably nowt to worry about - but do shout your doc if it gets worse or you get bad cramps.

Oh mother, really hope all is OK. I too had some pinkish CM around that point, and even at 16 weeks, but thankfully all has been fine - so hopefully you'll be fine too.

all gone this morning so fx all is ok.

and the nausea begins.

Good news mother.
As I think we all said, it appears that pregnancy is just one worry after another, followed by loads more worry (apparently) once the baby appears!

FINALLY have the money for the loft conversion in my current account. Only took two months from start to finish - bloody bank. There was one lovely man in the call centre who helped me keep my sanity, without him I think I would have given up - and changed bank accounts!

Started the working day with a row with an idiotic colleague. Annoyingly we had exactly the same row this time last year, about exactly the same thing, yet she's made the same mistake again this year. Really trying to not let it stress me out but it's so hard!

Cross post - oh, bad news mother

IDK Janey nausea is often a good thing... means the hormones are having a hay-day

Trust me now mother you will get to a point where you will forget what it was like to feel sick all the time. I didn't believe it , especially when vomming three times a day, but already at 21 weeks the memory is less vivid (barring the odd sicky day, like this morning, which usually comes when I'm stressed and tired).

Eat whatever you fancy right now (it will change daily if not more so), carry snacks everywhere you go and graze as much as possible, drink lots (try sparkling water if off tap water, took me ages to find that one), and take your time about everything - rushing around will make you feel worse.

Such fun!

Janey boo to work row, but great news about magic loft money! All hail to a callcentre angel - so rare but make life so much easier

I finally got around to asking for a PAC code for my mobile so I can switch companies at the weekend and, after 45 minutes on hold (I kid you not) bracing myself for the inevitable battle, I spoke to a nice woman who gave me it instantly - she had texted it while I was still on the phone to her!

OH said I'd missed a trick by not gunning for a better deal but the major problem for me was poor network coverage in the house so there was little to argue about. Good customer service shock!

Oh yes, pregnancy is a constant worry, better get used to it!

As said, I didn't really have much nausea, so when i did, chewing on some raw ginger actually seemed to help.

I'm in a whining mood again - honestly, I like living here and I don't want to be one of those immigrants constantly complaining how things were so much better in the old country, but sometimes this place seems to be stuck in middle ages. I'm used to a service culture, where places are open so working people can visit them, everything is made easy and not only that - you can do everything online, from your taxes to voting, not to mention doctors appointments.

But here - oh no. Opening times for anything, from doctor to post office, can be 9-12 and 14-16, but closed on Wednesdays and sorry, phones are answered on selected days only. I actually have to go to the hospital to let them know that I want to give birth there - absolutely no reason I couldn't fill out and send the forms but no, not possible. One of my banks only got official email addresses this year, before I was expected to send emails to the manager's private gmail address. Or send them a fax. A fax? Who uses those nowadays? Why not a carrier pigeon? Things like that. Sigh.

Barging in for some experienced answers please! Did any of you ladies happen to POA-OPK around the same time you got your BFP? I often use OPK's during my 2WW (having read loads of forums that suggest they could detect an early BFP before a HPT could) and have never seen a line but I got a faint line on an OPK just now. Just wondered if this had happened to any of the Berry grads?

Hey Merkin
I didn't even know you could do that, so no, I didn't. So not much help here, sorry. If I had known I would have been POA-OPK obsessively too. Really, really hope that the line is a good sign. When's your 2ww over?

hazle - moan away. You have to go to the hospital to register? FFS.

I'm with you Hazle. It's not as bad here but I am completely in favour of a 24 hour society everything is available at whatever time you want it.

I'm sure with trial and error you'll find your own personal remedies to alleviate the pregancy nausea Mother, but the thing that worked best for me was ice cold drinks - literally with ice from the bottom of the glass to the top. Like Brave said, it will be a distant memory before long and at least you know it will be worth it in the end.

Good news on the loft money Janey. Let the disruption begin, eh?

This morning's ante-natal class was on feeding and was a bit of a brain melter! There was so much to take in and remember I wish I had taken notes! They didn't discourage formula feeding at all and stressed that it should be a mother's informed decision, but personally it just made me even more determined to breastfeed if I can as the benefits to both mother and baby are just massive.

Worrying though was the research and statistics on establishing BF after any medical intervention during the birth. Apparently every newborn is born with a natural instinct to find the breast on its own - when placed on the mother's abdomen after birth it will (amazingly) crawl up to her breast and latch on all on its own like in this video (better watched without the highly annoying music) . But if there is any kind of medical intervention, whether it be pain-relief drugs, forceps, ventouse, CS or if the baby is separated from the mother for any period of time following birth this natural instinct is partially or fully lost, which then makes establishment of successful BF much more difficult.

It was a really interesting session but I know this 'perfect' birth without intervention is quite unlikely so I just hope I can get BF established afterwards.

In other news, I also learned a newborn's stomach only holds 5-10ml, so trying to force in any more than that in one go will lead to stomach stretching. This is why formula fed babies sleep 'better' because they are basically too full. Whether formula fed or breast fed the baby should always dictate how much it wants to take in one go.

Also, Aptamil formula is much dearer than Cow & Gate and SMA because it is marketed at middle-class mothers whereas the other two are targeted at working-class mothers. All 3 of them contain exactly the same ingredients because the DofH makes sure of it. Good to know!

No sorry Merkin, I was using the Clearblue OPK when I got upduffed so stopped testing after the smiley. I did get a strong BFP at 12DPO on a FRER though.

FX for your line being a BFP

Oh, if I for some reason cannot breastfeed, I will certainly want this gadget:
www.babynes.ch/EN/Pages/home.aspx