October 2013 hula hoops, daytime snoozes and booking in appointments

[Iheartcrunchiebars]

Here you go. New thread...number 3!

Hi all, can I join? I have been lurking around the website since we started TTC in August 2010 and these threads in particular since I had my bfp in January! I am 30 and 6 + 2 and have no other DCs. You all seem lovely and chatty and I have already picked up so many good tips and advice from you all!

Oh sorry, meant to also say that the estimated due date of my little bundle is 29th October!

Hi Rugbywife--congratulations, and welcome to the October bus!

Has anyone 'seen' TDD32 recently? She hasn't posted in a while. Hope everything is OK with her. Are we missing anyone else?

Great news RockChick - it's lovely seeing that little blob isn't it!

Welcome Rugbywife and congratulations!

Need advice - birthday of a friend tonight and she is having a get together at local pub - and this is my friend who is struggling to conceive. Really want to tell her in a discreet and personal way, probably text as advised on this thread, and certainly wouldn't consider telling her today of all days. Shall I just avoid? It's just so bloody obvious when I don't drink as am normally a lush life and soul of the party.

jelly if you feel that she or people might guess then I'd avoid, like you say it would be the worst day for her to find out. will she be very upset with u not being there?!

just wondering how many of you are planning on having the initial dual testing for don't syndrome done? I am,but not really sure why or how common it is to have done. wondering what peoples opinions are?!

that's obviously meant to say 'down's' syndrome

jelly I had this a few weeks ago, although not on my freinds birthday, turned out she guessed as soon as she saw me (although she'd known we were TTC) and I felt like an arse for not having told her. Sorry no helpful advice although think your doing the right thing not telling her today. Also if your anything like I was I was so worried about telling her and she was lovely, just because she wants to be pregnant doesnt mean she doesnt want you to be is what my friend told me.
roofio which ones that? we were just planning on having nuchal scan?

Have just been emailed asking to take part in a study of growth, would mean scans every 4-6 weeks which sounds lovely since I live right by the hospital... very tempted.
Welcome rugbywife

Welcome rugbywife and congratulations!

bowlfullofjelly I second roofio87 and say avoid the party. I know it's not ideal, but any speculation may force you to come clean and tell her on her birthday. Fortunately I haven't been the life and soul of any party in years so people don't expect me to drink!

roofio87 I am having the blood test at my 12 week scan, and then will have the nuchal fold test based on the results of that. I don't know what I'd so with the information either, except for prepare for the possibility of having a Down's syndrome child if we fell into the 'high risk' category. I have basically asked to have all the blood work done. I'd rather know what's going on so we can prepare.

Thanks for all of your comments about my scan dates coming through. I can't wait to have it as am yet to have a scan or any confirmation since I first POAS and the eleven times since.

I've been offered the nuchal scan along with blood tests to determine the risk. I've said yes,but think I might have changed my mind. could I ring the hospital and tell them?

Thanks ladies. There is a big group going so I really don't think she will be upset if I'm a no show. Have a 2 year old so she is used to me being a bit flaky. I know she will be happy for me, just don't want to rub her face in it on her special day. I'll avoid - the rain makes staying in more appealing anyway!

DP and I will not be having the nuchal scan, we didn't last time either, because it wouldn't affect our decision to continue with the pregnancy, so I think getting the odds may just cause unnecessary worry. But Roofio from all of the lurking I do it seems most people have this test so I think it's pretty common.

oh man, I am sat here crying my eyes out and I'm honestly not upset about anything!!!!! I think I'm going mad. fortunately I'm at home, not in work until later!!
rang the midwife and told her we've changed our minds about the test. I'm the same, I wouldn't have the further tests done and I wouldn't change anything even if I knew for sure so I think it will be unecessary worry.
right off to sort myself out!!

I didn't have the test with dd and would be reluctant now although DH would prefer me too. I would be in no doubt about carrying on the pregnancy but its something DH and I haven't really discussed. When I fell pg with dd we hadn't been together long and were living 100 miles apart so although he made it to both scans I made a lot of the year decisions alone. This time I will very much involve him as we are in a completely different situ.

Just enquiries about a reassurance scan at a local clinic and its £95. Not sure we can justify that when were moving house next week but he week after maybe ;-) think my mum might offer to pay as she seems overly keen for me to get one!

8+3 today and booking in tomorrow. Looking to get a scan around 10 weeks mark as my mmc was 9 weeks.

my dp has agreed that its whatever I'll be happiest with. he wouldn't want the further testing done or care anyway either so I think it will be less stressful for me if we don't so that's what we've agreed.

I know,the private scans are tempting,but I want to save every spare penny for the baby so couldn't justify the money.myself!! must be hard for you though hayleybop after a mmc xx

Roofio I will opt for the tests as we are ancient ( I am 41...lol). More to prepare ourselves. I would prefer the harmony prenatal test but we are not in londonw so would be difficult for us to travel...

Jelly...I tell people that Iam detoxing or on medication....

Pink...scans monthly sounds great :)

Rugbywife welcome!!!

Our gap between ds and thisittle bean will be 14 years....ouch factor!!!
Decided to be more optimist and told 4 close friends . they will be my support were things to go wrong andmy safety net so I ddon't go mental!!!! I am scared ( have to forget statistics) but very happy!)

I think I'll have the test, roofio although it won't change anything (ie, we'd continue with the pregnancy either way) but I'll feel better prepared. I'm not good at not knowing things!

Jelly sorry you'll miss your friend's birthday--think it's the right decision though x

I've been offered the tests as well and its a hard decision. I think I'll have them (but not the amniotic one) as I'd like to prepare for what's coming, but I'd continue with the pregnancy regardless so it'd be about preparation more than anything else. It would mean I'd be worrying lots though.. Hmmm...

Although we have no spare cash I would definitely have had a reassurance scan if I could get one in Spain. Waiting until 13 weeks to see if there is even anything there is horrible. Still convinced my body is playing a trick on me and theres nothing there. Go for it!

ahh roofio don't cry. You will start all of us hormonal women off as well!

pinkbuttons that sounds very tempting! You think the wait for 12 week scan is long - but it's 5 months between 20 week and getting your bubba. Only managed as got an extra growth scan at 30 weeks as stupid Doctor measured me at 27 weeks, when had been measuring at 29 weeks 2 week prior (a lot of weeks in that sentence, probably doesn't make sense )

While there are lots of extremely valid arguments against having an early private scan - unnecessary expense, still doesn't guarantee all is well at 12 weeks etc - I'm really glad I went for mine at 8+6. I'm still not taking anything for granted, but having had a MMC previously it is reassuring seeing that little blob's heart beating and wiggling around. So Haylebop if your mum is feeling generous, go for it .

I just heard someone in the office say sausage and now I MUST HAVE A BATTERED SAUSAGE IMMEDIATELY!!! My mouth is literally watering at the thought of that crispy, salty, greasy goodness. DP will be sent to the chippy tonight.

Right, must get on with a massive report that I have do redo as my boss has changed his mind about what he wants . Joy!

roofio I will be having the full screening as I did with dd was low risk with her 1 in 22,000 they said. So will go ahead this time to. Just woken from an afternoon snooze. Me and dd went to sleep on the sofa and I woke to her stroking my hair kissing my cheek saying you alright mummy? Bless kiddie winks eh lol
Welcome to newbies :-)

Can't remember who was having a dialemma about going out tonight but I suggest staying in personally as if I went to a party n didn't drink then everyone would no too lol

I'm having the nuchal test. For me personally, it would change things, and depending on the outcome of the nuchal, I'd be prepared to do the further tests to determine the chances of Downs, and might consider termination if the risk got to a certain level. It's such a personal decision (as most decisions during pregnancy are!)

(I was wondering whether I should post that first para, as I don't want to offend anyone with family or friends with Downs - I have a close relative with Downs and he is lovely, loved and loving. But I decided to, because sometimes it's useful for people to know that everyone makes different choices and none of them are necessarily wrong or right.)

Like many people here, am battling with myself in my head regarding whether I go for an early scan or not.

Can I just ask if I should be asking the midwife at booking for an early scan if my last pg ended in mc? I'm not stressing yet (8 weeks tomorrow) as my mc wasn't until 11+6, and my scan is scheduled for 12+1. But if they're likely to say yes then I might ask. We can't afford a private scan.

HotSoup - I was wondering the same about posting that the results of screening wouldn't effect my decision to carry on with the pregnancy, as didn't want to offend anyone for whom this may not be the case. It's such a personal an emotive subject that's it's difficult to know what will and what won't cause upset or distress. There isn't a right or wrong - everyone just needs to be happy with their personal decision.

I'm glad you did write that paragraph hotsoup cos although I can't say for certain until I'm faced with such a decision I think deep down it would effect my decision about the pregnancy but also like yourself would also go for all the further testing

badger you have nothing to loose by asking your midwife for an early scan but don't be diss heartened if they decline your request xxx

Hotsoup....you are right. We would wanted to know to prepare ourselves ...

Hayle....I think exactly the same but my mmc was at around 10 weeks..and that is close to the 12 week scan( dh reasoning) but I think it will give me peace of mind!!

badger all you can do is ask... they are unlikely to offer so what have you got to lose?

I understand an early scan doesn't mean everything is ok at 12 weeks. Had early scan at 7+4 last year to have bad news at the routine one.

I have however had a scan at around 6 wk with this pg during my first admission for HG. So having one at 9/10 weeks may not technically be an early early scan but the chance of Mc are reduced after hb detected at 9/10 wks:-)

Can I justify £95 for bad news though

I emailed the info to dh at work (since he's working 8am-9pm) and he said if I want one he will use his "rainy day" money. Poor bloke is more worried then me!