Over 30 first time mums to be club.

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I do not know if all the pregnant women over 30 leave work and lock themselves away but I feel bit lost in groups (Facebook pregnancy groups are a nightmare) talking work, pregnancy, commuting, buying mistakes and going through the biggest change of my life with no one in a similar situation. So any 30+ first time mums to be out there?

eggy I still haven't really cleared the tiredness, although it is at more manageable levels now, and I had no sickness at all. As far as I can see, pretty much every variation of every symptom is totally normal.

mayan That sounds like an interesting NVQ. I'm sure ther will be some use for it, I can't see the current thinking on probation and such lasting long. I'm in south London. I'm sure there will be something, I'll investigate further at some point. The advantage of being unemployed is that I can lie around on the sofa for most of the day and save a burst of energy for snow-clearing and cooking tea in the evening! The disadvantage is that I'm not sure how we are going to pay the rent for the next six months. I reckon we can manage this month, but after that we are going to have to tap my father in law for a loan, I think. If he can't help I don't know what we are going to do.

Hi All, would like to join the group too! I am 33 and 15 weeks pregnant today. Also worry about every little thing but finding this group and reading some of the comments has been so reassuring :-)

Well Hello everyone! Having had a day of worrying (tell you why in a minute) I have just joined mumsnet and spent the last hour reading this thread - some great support and advice out there girls, thanks!
I'm 38 and 18 weeks following my second round of IVF, having had a mmc after the first round in the summer. I think i'm getting away with most symptoms quite lightly, but then that just makes me worry more, in case the bump has stopped developing....
Reason for worrying today though was - I went to Pilates class (as advised by my MW) and the teacher commented on the fact that she thought I wasn't showing much. I had already been wondering about my bump - or rather lack of any specific bump-like-shape, and feeling generally just rather round and lardy! So this comment has now fuelled my panic stations in my head!
reassurance please!!! I heard the heart beat last week at MW appointment, so i'm sure nothing can have changed since then.....my OH is trying to be logical and help me to see reason, but pregnant ladies don't do sensible thought processes do they.?!
Nice to meet you all...

Hi bexi and welcome!!

I'm also 38, and a couple of weeks behind you (16 weeks) but know what you mean about the worry. But wanted to say do NOT worry about showing, we're all different. I'm 5'11 and not skinny at a size 12, and so assumed I'd show rather late as there's plenty of room, but am starting to show now (as in feel fat and have a bit of a tummy - like I've eaten a bit too much or have wind). My DSIL however, is a size 6 and about 5'6, and said to me the other day 'of course, like me, you won't start showing at all until about 20 weeks', which made me feel like a right lard-arse. You'd think that she, out of everyone, would show as there was NOWHERE for the bump to hide! But once she mentioned it I remembered that yes, she was teeny tiny for AAAAAAAGES and didn't even tell her boss until 20 weeks as no-one could have guessed.

Point being we're all different. So please please don't worry about some nosey teacher commenting as I'm sure you'll be huge and hating it before you know it!

Oh, and I'm also worryingly symptom free!

Welcome to the new joiners! This thread is a lovely place to share the worry.
I figure from the day you get pg worrying about the LO is part of the job description.

I totally agree with what janey said, we're all different and it's not worth trying to compare with others. From what I've read no two pregnancies are the same.

I'm 28 weeks tomorrow and haven't had any symptoms at all, apart from heartburn from about 24 weeks but that seems to have eased off now. I was googling symptom free pregnancies like mad for the first 20 weeks and expecting the worst but all seems fine. I wouldn't worry and just enjoy, easy to say I know.

bexi, I've had a complex about the size of my bump too. I'm 5'7 I think and a size 10-12 usually and it took ages for me to have a fully fledged bump. At 17 weeks I went on a business trip and no one had a clue I was pg, though they may have thought I'd been putting the pies away. My bump still seems compact but the MW was pleased with it so that's enough for me.

cycle, I hope that something sorts itself out soon. We've been through some tough times with DH being out of work and existing on a tiny freelance income and each time it seems to have led to something better. I'm sure things will come together for you.

Thank you Teapig. It's very frustrating.

My appointment for the midwife booking came today - 7th Feb! I'll be nearly 22 weeks by then, although I suppose it's a good sign that they don't seem to think it's urgent.

I've had very few symptoms - wind, tiredness and back ache being about it. I think that makes us the lucky ones!

Hello ladies

I just spotted this thread last night on my commute home and wanted to jump in and say hi! (Especially to Teapig who's on the April board too [waves!])

I'm 35, 36 on 3rd Feb, having my first (after a loss in 2011) due on 23 April, so 27+1 today. Oh, and we're having a girl and can't wait to meet her in three months time!

I've perused the thread and can identify with the commuting and budgeting issues (I'm a freelancer too and will only get MA, no SMP). But I'm really looking into the frugal/green living thing and have been finding some amazing (usually american) websites that are inspiring me.

Oh, and I also found this cool animation of the developing pregnant body today and where all the organs go as the baby develops. I found it after wondering just where my stomach is at the moment as the heartburn is still rife. Take a look: www.msichicago.org/whats-here/exhibits/you/the-exhibit/your-beginning/make-room-for-baby/interactive/

Now lets try and make it live... www.msichicago.org/whats-here/exhibits/you/the-exhibit/your-beginning/make-room-for-baby/interactive/

Hi Grow, that's an interesting animation. If only the birth was going to be as easy as it's shown there!

Indeed!

Evening all.

Hey grow! Great animation, that'll explain the heartburn then . If you have any links to the frugal/green living thing please do share. I'm all about frugal at the moment and could do with inspiration.

28 weeks today, feels like a milestone

Hello everyone new. Lots of worry here but lots of support too!

Eggy .... as if on cue this week I have been so tired! unable to do anything of use. I thought it was supposed to get better as time goes on, but this week has really knocked me for six. can't even cook- just grazing.

Still no scan date so will text the midwife tomorrow to see if she's got a number I can ring. Letter from NHS today but was exemption cert.

Fortunately the mass tiredness has also got rid of any homicidal feeling for poor DH.

I am less worried about the lack of symptoms... as nothing will be the 'solid' symptom that I want apart from seeing the little bean. And whilst all the things I do have- constipation, tiredness, slight nausea, spidey sense of smell, crying over complete random things- do exist in normal life, I guess having all of them together and the continued lack of bleeding indicate that things are going well.

• for your amusement, the latest crying top two are 1) blubbing when colleagues work contract was extended for a year because I was so happy (blamed PMT and think I got away with it)

2) Actually sobbing in the car when DH said we could get a KFC snack box and I wouldn't have to cook

Thanks teapig and mayanbob!

Some of them are blogs like this one: cheaphealthygood.blogspot.co.uk/

And the hilariously titled, 'penniless parenting! www.pennilessparenting.com/

And i love this one (plus she has a pinterest board and I'm obsessed with pinning!) makingdowiththenotsonew.blogspot.co.uk/

And talking of tearful, I'm on the edge of a blubber for no reasons apart from tiredness after a crappy night's sleep and leg cramps this morning - my new symptom!

27+2

ooh how exciting - I will be looking at all these links over the weekend!
Cycle I can't believe that you will not get to see the MW until you are 22 weeks. Talk about postcode lottery. Somebody else mentioned home visits - I had my first appt at home with the MW, which was most pleasant and chilled.

Grow - have you already tried growing your own fruit and veg? I've been attempting some "easy" (!) items, over the last few years with varying degrees of success. I think you really need to be in the garden every day, planting a new batch of this and that seedlings out, whilst harvesting what has grown to perfection and not been munched by slugs, snails and puppy dogs tails! Can you tell it is not going well on the horticultural front? We ended up with 20 lettuces all ready at the same time, millions of green tomatoes, and bags of potatoes (That, I can do seemingly) just when my OH decided to eat less carbs!!!
Think I'll stick to flowers.

I am an allotmenteer! This will be our third allotment year. It's not so time intensive as you think, not daily. From march to nov we go 1-3 times a week and we manage to fit it in with both of us working in London and commuting up.

I love being out in nature and can't wait to walk baby up there and do some weeding and planting while she naps (oh the romance of it!). Although I'm sure ill only get half as much done as I would normally. We have a baby bjorn carrier second hand, so may try digging with baby on me, we'll see.

mayanbob did you get your letter through?

Happy Friday everyone! I think I may be celebrating by... having an early night - still so tired!!

Welcome to all the newbies - and congratulations on your pregnancies!

grow and mayan think I may join you guys at being an emotional wreck. I cried today while teaching a lesson about women in Nazi Germany because the video clip I showed had pictures of babies...

teapig yay to getting to the 28 week milestone!

Am starting to get a little bump now at almost 14 weeks. I'm sure everyone just thinks I ate a few too many pies recently but it looks like a bump to me. When I stand in front of the mirror for half an hour and squint at it from every angle...

Happy Friday!

grow Still no letter- grrr... however, have texted midwife (yesterday) and am giving her till Monday to reply before I pick a number at random at the maternity hospital and try and sort it out.

Eggy hope you enjoy your early night.... the emotions are crazy aren't they? (Last night I cried because DH didn't win his darts match, ...not sobbing or anything, just welling up but still... this is ludicrous behaviour -at least yours was baby related)

Very jealous of you veggie growers... am currently resident in a flat with no balcony. I grew up with a mahoosive garden and my own veggie patch, and am now at an age where I miss it daily. It doesn't help by the fact our bedroom overlooks allotments.

I feel much less tired today. not sure why- but made the most of it and have done the hoovering. I did eat 2 packs of crisps and drank a (small) bottle of cherry coke... so maybe that's it.

Hope you all have a happy and healthy weekend, and get the sleeps you want.

How is everyone doing?

Morning!

I hope everyone has had a bit more sleep and are feeling more energised and less tearful.

Mayan - are you on your ring around for your scan date yet?

Who is feeling kicks now as well - cycle?

I've had a chocka week so far filled with a new OB consultant meeting that went soooo much better than the last consultant I saw (who was uncaring, aggressive and so patronising I asked to change!). Still weighing up delivery options as there are some issues following the surgery I had for the ectopic in late 2011. This woman is so much more respectful, caring and supportive. In the end, whatever I decide, so long as this baby comes out alive and well without too much trauma to us all, that's all that matters.

We've also had a tonne of hoo-ha over our bathroom project (half the suite not being delivered or available in our timescale and a flaky builder) so we've decided to scrap the whole damn project and tart up the bathroom we have to reduce stress and enjoy the time we have before the LO arrives.

So actually, a bit mental as it's only Weds. But I have a lovely meal out with an old friend tonight after work and it's my birthday this Sunday (36 - woop woop!) so we're having a 3D/4D scan on Sunday that was only £47 on a Groupon deal. So hopefully she won't look too squishy. .

28+1 (and going soooo fast!)

Hello everyone.

grow Glad you've got a respectful consultant and good on you for taking the low stress approach to decorate. (i'm just ignoring it all) Scan on Groupon?! I will have to pay more attention.

After some trauma, I have my Scan date. Next Thursday. I phoned up on Monday only to find out that the ultrasound department hadn't heard of me. Spoke to community midwife who put in another 'card' and everyone was very nice, but cue silent tears at work. However, got text from my midwife first thing on Tuesday (she had been off) saying she was chasing it, and she phoned me today with details. Also my bloods are all fine and I don't have a urine infection. So that's all jolly good.

Now excited and terrified because of scan. This is going to be the LONGEST week.

When I was talking about 'worst case scenarios' today with DH, he suggestes that I might want to talk to MiL about her ectopic pregnancy, and his cousins stillbirth. I said that I probably wouldn't want to talk about that. I wonder what goes through his brain sometimes... I really do.

Hope everyone else is well.x

grow That sounds like a manic week! Hurrah for consultants that get it!

Mayan Ooh, your scan is the same day as my booking appointment, that will be exciting! Good news on the bloods being fine. I just can't imagine why you might not want to talk to all the people who have had terrible things go wrong . Sometimes people have a strange idea as to what is helpful.

I have done 2 days temp work this week - 3 girls with chicken pox. Not ideal, but easy, since they just wilted on the sofa and periodically took themselves off to bed for a nap. The advantage of temp work is that you don't have to worry about 3 year olds who have nappies and dummies and 6 year olds who don't eat vegetables - it's not your problem .

I have been feeling the movements for a couple of weeks, particularly this evening, which might be down to the 1/2 glass of proper coke I had earlier! I don't usually drink coke, but I needed something fizzy for the heartburn and that was all I could find at the temp job. My husband is off work with a chest infection and, having been given steroids by the gp today, is likely to be somewhat grumpy this weekend. Joy. The 16 year old is showing signs of not coping with the idea of the baby, but he is supposed to be in the Peak District next week doing outward bound type stuff with the princes trust, so maybe the distance will give him a chance to get used to it. There is information about helping 2 and 3 year olds with a new sibling, but remarkably little about helping a 16 year old with Asbergers!

Hey theere cycle glad you've had some temping and they were well beahved. Good luck with your booking appointment next week.

I am loving the coke - cherry coke to be precise. I wish I could have something useful to say about 16 year old siblings with Aspergers... but it's not mhy area of expertise. However, doing the princes trust has got to be good...

Sympathies for a poorly DH as well.

Does anyone else have spotty skin. It's just gross. I look old, spotty and gross. ah well... happy pregnancy me.

mayan I have lovely spots too - very attractive. And blotchy chest. It's great!

I'm going to have to give in and get some maternity stuff - I've got hardly any bras left and I need some tights and leggings, if nothing else. My friend was going to bring some stuff from her boss, but I think I need some stuff before she's going to get here. I'll have to buy tights and bras anyway. I know my sister ended up something like a 34J, so I want to manage with as few as possible - I can't afford lots in different sizes!

Another interview on Saturday for a 3 week job at the end of feb. Not ideal, but better than nothing.