Over 30 first time mums to be club.

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I do not know if all the pregnant women over 30 leave work and lock themselves away but I feel bit lost in groups (Facebook pregnancy groups are a nightmare) talking work, pregnancy, commuting, buying mistakes and going through the biggest change of my life with no one in a similar situation. So any 30+ first time mums to be out there?

I'm currently unemployed, and pretty much unemployable . I can temp for a bit, although that is tricky whilst I'm waiting for appointments, but it should be easier when I've had a scan and stuff. I don't know how we are going to manage later - I can't take a brand new baby to a temp job and I'm rather lacking in qualifications to do something different. I'm sure some bright idea will strike!

Hope something turns up soon cycle is it general temping that you do or specific? Have you tried temping for local council? a friend of mine got a permanent job through them that she could do from home, only going into the office occasionally... I know that is a bit of a specific situation, but it's an idea. Plus some bigger companies have childcare.

Good luck though- and if we can help in anyway.

Hi all- haven't posted for a while as been laid up with a migraine for days but back at work now (not completely sure which is worse!)

It's reassuring to see the rest of you having similar issues with feeling ill at work, worrying about going back after maternity leave etc. I will definitely have to go back- would so like to go down to 4 days but my boss has a track record of saying a big fat no to everyone who has asked to go part time in the last couple of years after their maternity leave...

At least I don't have the problems that others of you have with deciding when to go on maternity leave though as I am a teacher and due 1st August (I think - find out for sure on Friday!) so will just work up until the summer holidays start.

What other things are people worrying about? I feel like I worry about everything and anything at the moment!!

That's great conception timing for a teaching job Eggy! Well done to you and your DP/H!

I am worrying about most things but disguising it well to most people I think.
I'm 16+6 and worried about possible findings at the anomaly scan. I'm worried about my changing body shape and the fact that I don't like it very much when I probably should be enjoying/embracing it. I'm worried about going back to work after maternity leave. I AM VERY WORRIED ABOUT THE BIRTH and being left with a wizard's sleeve. You name it, i'm worried about it!

Hope something turns up for you soon cycle. Sounds like very good timing for you eggy.

I had the day off work today and went to Ikea to get some furniture for the nursery. I hope we're not buying things too soon but can't wait to transform the spare room into baby's room.

As for worrying about things I can tick off everything on Rache's list and probably have a few more besides. My top worries are:
the terrifying prospect of my belly button becoming an outie
not doing enough of the things we won't be able to do when baby arrives
birth - there are probably 100+ worries I have with that
taking care of a new born - what to do I do?!
still birth - sometimes I worry that it will all go wrong at the last minute
affording maternity leave - we are going to be counting the pennies
going back to work - not sure what agreement I'll come to with hours etc

That's just the top 7! But actually since turning 25 weeks I have started to relax a lot more, would you believe it? 27 weeks tomorrow, yay!

teapig love the fact that your belly button is at top place of your list of worries! But also have many of the same worries as you- mainly the work and money ones.

rache would love to say that this was good timing but DH and I have been trying for well over a year now so just pure coincidence!
And when you say you name it you're worried about it - I can definitely sympathise with that - I listened to a radio programme about autism object the way home and then spent a good couple of hours worrying about how we would cope if our child had autism...

So considering I am having my 12 week scan on Friday - would you say you guys are worrying less - or more - than you did at my stage?

Eggy it's certainly reassuring to see and hear that everything is ok at the 12-week scan. The relief lasts about half a day until you start worrying about the 20-week one.

Eggy Hmmm, that's a tough question. I would say I am worrying less since the 12 week scan, but about more things if that makes any sense?!
Pre 12 weeks all I could think about was it all going south and was convinced it would at any moment. Post 12 weeks I feel more confident that this whole shebang will result in an actual baby but I am worrying about everything which surrounds that prospect. I think once you get a BFP you don't stop worrying about your offspring until the day you die!

Still waiting for a scan/mw appointment. Going to call the dr tomorrow if there is still nothing - by her calculations I must be coming up to 19 weeks and I don't have a due date or anything!

mayanbob I am a nanny - so finding longer term work when pregnant or with a tiny one is going to be tricky . There are so many times in the last 15 years when I had a job that I could have taken maternity leave from and then taken my baby to work with me and I had to find out that I was pg when I was between jobs . Ho hum, I'm sure it all be fine and I'll think of a hitherto undiscovered talent that I can use to work from home.

cyclecamper - wow to you being a nanny but alas I am afraid I have absolute zero experience of that area. Will keep my fingers crossed for you though. X

As for worries... I am Pre 12 weeks, so main massive worry is 'is it ok'???
I also have developed the tiniest of pains (not even sure it is a pain, might just be a feeling) on my left side, so am worried about that.
Not too worried about birth, but worried about how What on earth you do- and terrified that i'll get PND and my baby will get taken away by social services. .

Other than that - I'm absolutely fine

Rache what a lovely thought - a lifetime of worry!

Cycle definitely chase for your appointment - it's so annoying waiting for other people!

mayan try not to worry about the pain in your side. I had surgery to remove a fallopian tube 8 months ago so I've been in quite a lot of pain on my side since I've been pregnant but I'm actually reassured by it as the doctor assured me this would definitely happen as my uterus grows. You may not have the scar tissue but I think a lot of the little pains/twinges on the sides are growing and stretching pains so it's all a good thing.

My latest worry is seeing the weather report this morning and now I'm worried that my scan on Friday will be cancelled because of the snow- I don't know how I'll cope if it's delayed!

Eggy and Mayan Thanks. I'll call the dr to chase the appointment this afternoon. I'm not too worried about pregnancy - I've spent my life around pregnant women and seem to be getting off pretty lightly so far! Not too worried about the birth - I've seen a few of those too, and I don't think worrying is going to change what happens, so I'm going with the flow. Not worried about the baby - likewise, I've dealt with a few so can probably cope with what turns up!

I am only really worried about how we are going to afford me not working - had I known I was going to be pg, I would have paid off my credit cards last year instead of buying a new tandem , because I find that I really really really don't want to drag a baby to work with me. The problem with nannying is that you get paid the same net per hour permanent as you do gross per hour temping so you end up seriously out of pocket if you temp for any length of time.

My other worry is my husband - I can see him panicking and if he panics, he gets depressed and I don't know how to stop that happening. He needs a new job, but has had too much sick time in the last year to reasonably look, and there is no guaranteeing that he would be happier after a job move even then . I feel guilty for (unintentionally) making things more complicated around here than they already are.

Well the appointment finally arrived in the post at 2.30pm today. For a scan at 2pm today! I phoned and explained and they re-scheduled for tomorrow. The frank was dated yesterday so goodness knows what went wrong there, they reckoned the appointment was made a while ago so it must have been floating around a post room or something.

I'm a bit weepy today.

Oh cycle that's so rubbish - hospital admin can be so slow - glad you got it rebooked for tomorrow. Sorry you've got so many other stresses going on - I'm sure things will sort themselves out soon x

hugs to you cycle (however unmumsnetty that is) and so sorry that you have stuff on and are feeling a bit crappy.

You must try to remember that you aren't making things more complicated -even though it may seem that way at the minute, and I bet you everything will be just fine -whatever life throws up.

Good luck with your scan tomorrow! You seem to be very good at sorting things out- I'd probably try to blame myself (or poor DH) and then still have no scan.

Am quite jealous of your experience with babies.... I seriously haven't a clue. Only have a couple of not uber close friends with babies, and my youngest neice is 25- so haven't got any family practice either. I hope you'll share your wisdom.
Xx

hope your scan goes well today cycle and it is really good they got you in so quickly.
I have my anomaly scan this morning I know I should be excited but I am worried about things going wrong.

Good luck curly, I still have weeks til mine and understand the worrying..

Everything is fine and it is a boy ! now we just need to think of names as OH does not like any boy's names.

Congratulations!

Congrats. I'm having a boy too. After much discussion we have agreed on Louie

Congrats curly - fantastic news!

Congratulations curly! That's great news! A little boy, how exciting.

We found out that ours is a girl and after much discussion we've whittled it down choices but not sure I'm brave enough to share them, got a lot of mixed feedback on the name boards. I hadn't realised how tricky choosing a name is until now.

Hey Curly Congratulations on the Scan! Brilliant news! and jsa Louie is a lovely name.

i'm nervously waiting for my midwife to arrive for my booking appointment... I know it's not something you can pass or fail... but still.

Is everyone on here finding out the sex? I hadn't even thought yet.

I am also absolutely knackered so I hope I don't fall asleep before hand!

Congratulations Curly! Lovely news!

We have been for a gender and well-being scan tonight. All seems well and we are having a girl, which I am pleased about

How did your booking go, Mayan?

Thanks Rache Congratulations on your scan and your little girl! How excited must you be?

re: booking, She just left! Was very nice. It seems I get community midwife care because I live near a dodgy area have a particular postcode. Means she'll always come to see me. Plus when if I go into labour, they come out to see how you're doing and tell you when you need to go in and I have mobile contact 24 hours a day.

Also -and this is the most exciting... our local swimming pool does free swimming for pregnant ladies. Whoo hoo!

Am currently more excited than worried.... expect normal service to resume tomorrow.