March 2013 VI: cooking, crocheting and chit-chat

[theTramp]

Old thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1558560-March-2013-Mk-V-Lumpy-bumpy-witty-knitters-patiently-await-the-bloom?msgid=34370452#34370452

And on with the conversation

Hey zoey just seen your post. You've every right to feel annoyed! God people can be so insensitive! Babies of both gender are wonderful and people have no right to judge! Why can't they just be happy for you! Sending you lots of happy blue vibes!!

em - feeling pathetic makes perfect sense, but you're not pathetic you're just incubating a small human who needs you to sleep a lot and apparently your body findds it amusing to make you feel nauseous. One day you will get your own back and with gusto. Have a little nap and see how you feel when you wake up.

JoJo - I didn't realise fellopian tube had to be removed, sorry to hear that my dear, I know that was something you were worried about. As noted above, it doesn't necessarily effect fertility so get more info from your consultant when you are ready and get all the facts you need. In the meantime, rest up and heal as quickly as you can. The scar sounds cool btw.

Place marking

Marking place so I don't lose you all

Hello, justs a quick one again i'm afraid. Seem to be constantly flipping between very busy and very very tired with not much in between!

Jojo Glad op went well, hope recovery is very quick as it can be. Well done for getting through it all!

Shel sorry to hear about your friend who mc :( was that the lady who you guessed was pg?

Newyearsday come back and talk to me about HBAC! how on earth do you get them to agree to one? My midwife just dismissed it as a total non-thing last week at my 16 week appt. I was only sectioned for undiscovered breech before so should be a lower risk VBAC at least.

ZOey am for you. Some people are so fooking rude. I know if we have another DD, some people (mainly dh's family-totally male dominated) will be giving us the sympathetic looks. I don't give a flying fook what we have and certainly am not remotely bothered about the son and heir crap. I'll be happy as long as it's healthy and another low maintenance child!!

My back is giving me some grief. DD still going through phases of wanting to be carried and at 15kg, it's not good on my back at all. Going to have to take it steady I think.

em I have days when I could just get in bed and pull the duvet over my head. One good thing about DH being away for two weeks is that he will owe me big style when he gets back! Two weeks looking after DD and house on my own is worth a multitude of brownie points methinks!

Hi ladies
Zoey that is so rude! I'm not sure if I want to find out the sex, and people keep asking me which I'd prefer - this is our first and no-one seems to believe I really don't mind. Of course you'll love this little one no matter what!
Sheldon I feel your pain re: clothes. Over the past two weeks I am definitely now in 'maternity' wear mode due to discomfort - in an old, stretchy jumper dress and H&M maternity leggings today. So sorry to hear of your friend's mc too, very sad.

Feeling a bit guilty as took today off - have done the grocery shop as the house was bare and have cooked lunch and supper, but have spent the rest of the time uploading holiday pics on FB and reading blogs! Loving the autumny feeling in the air. Have not managed to catch up on here, but am hoping no-one has been too badly affected by the flooding?

Hi guys! Been a couple of days and am trying to catch up.

Jojo get well soon! X

zoey so rude!

Em sounds like you're maybe anaemic?

I've had a mad day at work and am looking forward to a chilled out weekend. Had some exciting news about a promoted post coming up at my local school, but it would mean working full time. I think I could do it, but it would be bloody hard work for the first wee while ... Hmm, lots to think about, but I think I will apply when it comes up. Head of dept jobs don't come up in my subject very often and never on my doorstep!

Evening. Just had a fantastic curry and a lovely almost-no-alcohol cider :) Perfect friday night.

zoey That is so very rude isn't it. People say the daftest things. My aunt has 4 boys and they are so much fun. I've had the old wives tales at work today - I must be having a boy because I'm carrying all out front!

Em You poor thing. I hope you can get a good night's sleep.

Three Yes, it was the one I had just found out was pg and had some lovely chats with. Feel so awful for her.

Lexi The autumny feeling is lovely isn't it :) Was your holiday weather good?

possom Promotion sounds exciting!

So I've missed another thread move because I'm rubbish at Mumsnetting regularly, but please can I be allowed back to join the ow ow ow back/pelvis club. Saw the physio today and he did some serious stretching and prodding, but I am now in agony from the combination of that and a super-clingy toddler who doesn't want to go to bed...

On the positives though, I'm feeling lots of little flutters from the bean, and only have to wait 11 days until the next scan. We're having a green/yellow/orange/white baby but still looking forward to seeing it and hoping that it's ok in there.

Did I see something about a Facebook group? I'm much better at FB than MN!

to everyone and hope you are all ok. I've got Chinese for dinner if anyone fancies sharing crispy duck pancakes! First time I've felt up to it since getting pg!

KURLY!! How the devil are you!!! (tis Herm321 from frolickers or some other thread).

Went for dinner with my best friend this evening (added bonus of not having to deal with DH sisters) we went to Nandos and omg it was amazing and much needed as ain't have dinner in ages as my sickness seems to start at 4.00pm!!!! I didn't fancy any puddings there so friend took me to Tesco and bought me a cake- got to love her it's amazing what cheers me up these days- now relaxing in bed as pelvis is buggered, the crutches are coming out and I have dug out my back/ pelvis support- I am determined to not do pain killers a long as possible though so rest is the best choice :)
kurly it's a secret group on Facebook that only members can see so I think manda needs to invite you but she is pretty organised so I am sure will :)
Got a very wiggly little man tonight who clearly loved getting food this evening, maybe he will let e eat dinner more often!!!

Sheldon it was, glorious sunshine with a sea breeze! Am trying not to think about it! . Feel very lucky - now to try to get all the laundry done and dry in the glorious British climate.

Where did you go lexi?

Zoey - oh sod 'em. They're clearly idiots.

Shel - yes I keep being asked what I would prefer, when I say "healthy" I think people assume I am being politically correct. I am genuinely amazed that anyone would say something like "Oh I would hate to have a girl" or "Oh I just really want to have a boy" - I just want Socrates to come out healthy & happy and to stay that way regardless of gender. Although if I do have a girl I am really hoping they'll be a tom boy because a girly girl will be massively hard work for me, I just won't know where to start, I'll be the worst possible Mum for them!

Glad to hear friday evenings are on the whole going well for folks.

Hello ladies!

I've missed so much! Was out at an archive yesterday and forgot the lead to charge my phone so couldn't use it as a modem and just had the odd read of the thread on my phone instead ? have to say I got a little bit more work done than usual! DH and I travelled home together and had Date Night (we were hoping for a table in Chiang Mai, for those who know Oxford, but tried to book a table too late in the day so went to Quod instead).

I woke at 4am early fretting about book (it is going on Monday!) so I thought I may as well get up and Mumsnet see to it.

V.v. happy to see from here and FB that JoJo is out the other side of her op, yippee! all round! Hope you get to go home soon!

Sundae sounds like you're in a bad way with the pain etc. I second Ood and others' feet-stamping suggestions. Seriously, if I'm in the high risk clinic because of my smallish bits and bobs then you definitely need some special attention and monitoring, I think.

Ood are you now Angels?!

to Best. It's horrible coming off the bike at the best of times, but when pregnant and with DD on board ? well, I can't imagine. You poor thing. I'm just so pleased that someone wonderful and lovely was there to look after you. That lady has good karma coming her way. Hope you're feeling okay?

Hurray for happy heartbeat, Sarah. Sounds like you've done amazing stuff with the PTA, but also the right time to let it go. Re next phase of working life, what about writing a 'Don't just suck it and see?' type manual for those with no clue about what's about to hit us re childcare, schooling, etc?! I for one would buy it!

Ethel, your life sounds like it has a great balance. Pity about the driving about but maybe something closer to York will come up in the next year or so? DH has been prompted by the mere idea of childcare costs for twins to revamp his CV after 10 years in same company and is now actually getting quite excited about the possibility of new challenges. And his company will almost definitely make him a good counter offer, and if that was sufficiently ££ and also factored in some substantial flexi-working then that could be enough to make things a lot easier.

Possom sounds like a great opportunity!

Kurly welcome back! You need to be FB friends with someone already in the group, so secret and Mason-like is it. If you are ok with that, message me (or anyone else in the FB group) with your RL name and a description of your profile pic. All others welcome too! It's lovely to share pics and stuff!

Tamp, 'healthy' is so the right answer! People are daft sometimes.

Pink thanks for that coat link! Very nice and, as you say, a bargain! I'm going to put it off a wee bit longer as yesterday I discovered that a John Lewis coat I bought last winter or the one before when I was carrying a bit of extra weight still fits me and with growing room! Yippee!

Zoey, I second Chefette's encouragement to do 'other stuff'! I 'surprised' DH the other night and he has been on cloud nine ever since! Your DH has got to understand about the stitch - it's not worth going there - but, you know, ahem ? etc ...

Chefette how did the relaxation class go?

Em baby brain is kicking in a bit here too! Can you afford to get someone in for two hours to spruce up the house? We're looking at cleaners and going rate seems to be £7-10 per hour. Could be worth every penny. And can you be persuaded not to iron, or at least cut it down by a lot? I never iron anything apart from for interviews, weddings, funerals! Probably why I look a right scruff bag half the time but I don't care! You are the priority right now though.

Oh, and I've started to waddle, and it took me 30 mins to walk a mile yesterday. I have turned into a snail.

manda it took me 20 mins to walk to the end of a hospital corridor and back yesterday!!! Don't fret about the waddle - from what I know of these things (which isn't a lot I must admit) you'll adjust your walking style but it won't be long term :)
tramp try not yo let other people's opinions get to you - your body and life choice is yours only and people will always have an opinion. I wonder what their reaction would be if you said 'I don't mind as long as i have an in healthy baby' people are weird!!

I'm hoping to head back to York on 5th Oct so if any one in the general area wants a coffee or meet let me know and I'm in :)

Just wanted to thank you all for your kind messages, it's been really nice reading them and just watching you all from a distance really whilst I've been recovering :)

Zoey people are v v insensitive. I had loads of people ask me if we were going to try for a girl after ds3. Well actually we are having ds4! People's faces sometimes drop when I tell them. You need to be very thick skinned. I tell people that we always wanted 4 boys. In lots of ways I think it will be easier having all boys anyway and definitely cheaper!! All you want is a healthy baby. I couldn't care less whether it has a willy or not!

Thanks everyone and pink 4 little men sounds amazing, DS 2 has just wondered into DS1 rooms and pulled out all his Lego and DS1 is now sat playing with him between DS2 shooting him with a spud gun (well making the noise) what's not to love about boys and another one in the mix sounds fab! We won't be havi anymore as we always said 3- that was gender based it was just me and DH are both 1 of 3 and that's what we wanted.

Blimey you guys get up early I am going to have a shock when baby comes as DS1 is nearly 10 so surfaces when his little bother wakes and DS2 sleeps about 13 hours a night and another good few hours in day which is amazing- not sure a newborn will understand I like sleep,lol!

Now I know what bump is I am talking to him so much more which I am loving it :)

I know it sounds silly Jojo when you get up try not to tense- it took about a week to learn that your trying to tense muscles that have been cut through (after c section) so I resorted to breathing through it when I got up an moved and was so much easier. Getting up and about does help but in small doses, don't tire yourself your body is repairing its self :) and I waddle when not pregnant so walk like a pregnant duck now it's part of the fun :)

Well I'm waiting for DD to appear and have her breakfast and then we are supposed to be at baby ballet in an hour! At the moment she's sitting on the stairs playing with bloody stacking cups that she's just rediscovered! Grrrrr!

Anyone here into going to the theatre? I used to do loads of amateur dramatics before DD came along and love going to see shows and plays, but dont manage it nearly as often as I'd like now. Last night two of my friends were watching shows that I've been in as an amateur and i was very jealous! one was watching Jesus Christ superstar up in Newcastle and the other was seeing chorus of disapproval in London. Have already got tickets for JCS, but think I am going to organise myself a flying visit down to London to see CoD. Im not really into sport, but have always loved the theatre, albeit the fairly mainstream stuff.

Jojo it would be good to meet up. Perhaps all of us Yorkies could get together? When you in York until?

I could head to York pretty easily I reckon (from Leeds),and it wouldbe nice to visit as I don't think I've ever actually been other than to work at the race course in my teenage/student years

Glad you're coming round JoJo and bean is fine.

Well, I brought a pile of work home with me this weekend and supposed ot have the day off on Monday but will end up going in fo rhte afternoon (would go in am too but I have MW appointment and DS has jabs and 2 year review - felt quite organised getting them all booked one afte rthe other!.

My parents are supposed to be visiting today, but they've never said when they are turning up, and if they will have none, one or two of my brothers with them. Really helpful. House totally devoid of food at present and have eaten nothing but crap or bread for the last few days as a result so shopping and tidying this morning before DH is takeing DS to football so I can do some work. Think le parants are arriving about 4.30pm as my Mum is doing a part time degree and has university today. Do wish they'd just said that when we invited them and we'd have picked a different day so they could actually come for the day, not just tea. I tink she goes every other week, or maybe even once a month. But my parents are a bit hopeless. Oh well!

Oh, that was a me post. Sorry! Pink, people are just thoughtless. I only have 1 son and already getting questions about 'do you want a girl' and having been so sick this time when I wasn't bad at all last time lots of, 'oh you must be happy - that measn it will be a girly'. Errr, actually no I'm not happy about feeling like crap all the time and secretly actually would like another boy (though would only ever say happy eith a healthy baby and no preference!).

Was it Best that came of the bike. Hope you're OK and what a lovely lady bringing flowers as well as taking you home. People can be so kind.

Sorry to hear so many strugling with mobility adn pain etc. The joys of pregnancy are never ending aren't they!

Morning everyone

Ouch best but what a lovely lady

Jojo so glad to hear you are on the mend and little bean is a happy bean too

Zoey You can't win people thought I was crazy having a 3rd dc when I "already have one of each" so God knows what they think now, I'm just plain greedy ,
I've already had ahh another wee boy would even it all up, yes a boy would be nice so ds could have a brother BUT I just look at it as another little personality to add to the mix, afterall dd2 is just crazy, one minute she will be in her Stephanie costume (for those of you who don't know, Stephanie is PINK from head to toe) then she will be in ds's old spiderman costume shooting webs at everyone, so Tramp you might get a girly tomboy like my dd

Manda goodluck for weekend getting book ready to GO!

I must have made the doctor at the hospital very sorry for me, as my bp was slightly raised, I had trace ketones in urine, and I told her I was just so stressed about dd1's new meds, and I had been so sick the day before, and I would really just love a quick peak at bean, she said they don't normally scan every time but she would give me a quick one, YEY
So bean had nice healthy heartbeat and was doing YOGA, it had its foot right up over its head, it was all curled up, so I was all happy and relaxed again, will worry about dd1 next week when we go to see how to inject new meds

Anyway off to deliver final cake and maybe buy a new bra and tousers

waves to everyone else hope you have a lovely weekend

Jojo get well soon honey! I also have one fallopian tube. It's a bit of a shocker when you find out but it DOES NOT mean 50% fertility, the working tube waves around and can catch an egg from either side.

Three it's your human right (and the law) to have your baby how and where you chose. No-one needs to 'allow' you to do anything. But of course you need support too. I got crafty! From talking to local doulas I found out about the consultant midwife at the local hospital who's job it is to reduce the number of cs's, she is very pro-vbac. I sent her an email explaining my traumatic 1st birth in the delivery unit and my difficulties in finding support within the nhs for my hbac plans. She replied immediately and told me to come and see her in October, and to cancel my obs appointment. Yey! I'll let you know how I get on.

Join the vbac yahoo group, see if there's any local vbac or homebirth group near you, talk to local doulas about what other women have done in your area, get really informed. I was similar to you in that mine went wrong due to malposition, I have to believe it won't happen twice. There is no reason on earth you shouldn't have the birth you want.

Have you seen the Freedom for Birth film? It's amazing and makes you realise how lucky we are in the country, but reminds us all it's our right to chose how and where we birth, whether we want an elective c-section, hospital birth or homebirth, it's our choice.

Will catch up later - it's my 'day off' so I'm off into town to have my hair cut, shop, lunch and re-charge!

With genders I think its a bit of a shame that people still feel the need to constrain what the child is going to be like with their own hopes and expectations of what each sex does or will behave like. Very old fashioned! I keep flipping anyway between what I think it is. But hoping that whether I get a boisterous boy or a sensitive boy, or wild girl or a quiet girl they feel loved for who they are and we are able to help them follow their dreams :)

Logistically girl is going to easier for me in the baby prep as I have about four things that aren't pink but then again i'm sure it wouldn't be hard to find homes for a two year stash!

Was planning to buy dd a cricket set this weekend because she is always chucking stuff and has an amazing throw on her! (nothing wrong with a bit of hot-housing!)

This does however rely on me actually getting out of bed... I'll let you know how I get on!