December 2012 christmas puddings

[PrunellaDeVille]

over here, that came around suddenly

WeeJo I'm a list person too! I've started a massive spreadsheet with everything I need want and how much it should cost. The bottom line is crazy! Lots of people are promising to give/sell me things so that should ease up some of the costs.

annelid glad scan went okay, congrats on team blue!!

im a tad confused 2blessed...... our total list over here so far is a few packs of baby grows.. a snowsuit.. got a car seat and isofix second-hand (family).. got a moses basket + stand second hand (car boot).. il need a new mattress for the moses basket.. and a pram.. which im looking for on ebay?!
whats costing all of the money?!
scared il be depriving my child..

Hello everyone - I was on here back in the first trimester but I could never keep up - work is a bit mental and DS is pretty demanding, so I had to let it lapse and go back to lurking in AIBU and gawping BUT I need your help:

We had our scan yesterday and have found out we are having a boy. It was a wonderful scan, and DH was able to come, and it was REALLY obvious we were having a boy (no shyness on this foetus, just lots of willy-waving!). DS is 2 and this is our final baby, and I know that DH is experiencing some gender-disappointment. He wanted a girl the first time around (not that you'd know now, he's a wonderful father) and I think he's really struggling to deal with "Now I'll never have a daughter." - I'm a bit sad I'll never know what it's like to have a daughter, I confess, but mainly I'm sooo excited to meet DS2, and so thrilled that DS1 will have a lovely little brother, and basically I'm just delighted. So I feel sad for DH ... and don't know what to do. We only found out this time so that DH would have plenty of time to get over it/used to it before the birth, last time we opted for the surprise. I know he'll be mad about this baby, as he is about DS1, and I know that all will be fine in a few months - but it's hard, as I feel sad for him and also a bit miffed it's dampening my parade, somewhat.

Anyone else experienced a partner with gender disappointment? Or yourselves? What did you do?

Bubbleson my list I've got chest of drawers, travel system, moses basket, mattress for a cot bed that my friend is selling me, bath, top and tail, bedding, towels, changing mat, baby monitor and then start up clothes. I've cut it down a lot since I first started it. I was going to get a 2nd hand pram but I'm nervous that if anything goes wrng with it I'm stuck. Whereas if I buy new then it will have a guarantee. Probably silly but thats the way I shop for big purchases and as I don't drive I'm going to be relying on a good, solid pushchair. But the budget is just that and I am looking at making savings where I can e.g over the past few years I've been given loads of john lewis, H&M and M&S vouchers that I've saved so they'll come in handy. p.s I'm also a shopaholic...

Daydream I know you're right, I know I will just feel a bit of pressure because its Christmas as well. Think I'll DP cook a big gammon joint and get some breads and chutneys in and that will have to do everyone

weejo I think someone was confused when they told you that. Advice is not to introduce a bottle until breast feeding is established which is generally six weeks. I think it's a personal choice and as long as you ate informed as to how it might impact you're supply (negatively or positively) then it's up to you what you do

Thanks so much for that, Spotty. I am very confused about the whole thing! Can I ask a few more questions? So, if you don't introduce a bottle until six weeks then what is the point in having a pump? Or can you express the milk and then keep it? Doesn't it spoil? Is the reason for not introducing the bottle until breast feeding is established because it is confusing for the baby?

Sorry for all the questions

Hi all pru i think you've done the rigyt thi g getting the chest of drawers first. Our baby doesnt have a bedroom and we have no room for furniture for it so all its things are sat in a box in our wardrobe at the minute :(

I already had a pram,car seat and lots of blankets and bottles, 2 hats mosea basket and pram sheets

I have bought

Steriliser
Teats
Dummies
Breast pads
Cotton wool
A few nappies
8 newborn baby grows
6 newborn vests
Baby monitor
2 swaddeling blankets
2 cot sheets

Still want/need

Cot (ebay)
Mattress(new)
Bouncy chair(ebay)
Play mat(ebay)
Nipple cream
2 more cot sheet
More nappies
Changing mat
Changing bag
Nice(way to expensive) muslins
A baby nomade

Think thats about it

Scan in just over 2.5 hours

anne congrats on team blue

weejo im no expert but i think if you introduce a bottle too early you are in danger of affecting your supply breast milk can be kept for ages in the fridge and can alao be frozen. I froze a whole weeks worth for my dd2 as we were going to be apart for a week just before she was 6 months old

blackcurrents sorry to hear about gender dissapointment, were finding out tomorrow so might be in the boat with you! however, i think that making sure your DH is as involved as possible is the best option really. pick out some cute outfits together.. maybe?
ignore me someone very knowledgeable will be along soon! and if not try 'pregnancy' forum? have a and wallow in the fact you have a healthy baby boy growing in there! congrats!

blessed me and dp talked over the pram thing, and i was with you on the gaurentee, but ive just had my car insurance quote come in at 975.. so second hand for me!

i know this sounds stupid, but is a carrycot and a moses basket the same size / need the same size sheets / mattresses? i think thats going to be my next purchase, trying to do it gradually so we can afford to eat!
also, my DA (aunt!) has said she is going to start to put together a 'starter kit' of helpful stuff, so no baby dresses / jeans but stuff like muslins and nappies, so hoping that will help a lot as well!!

blackcurrants - I also really did want to have a girl and we are having a boy. I am still a bit disappointed at times but I know that I will get over it. It took us nearly 2 years to conceive so I am just so aware that I am actually massively priviledged to be having a baby at all.

I am sure it will be fine in the end :)

blackcurrants if the scan was only yesterday then your DH has had little time to adjust to the knowledge but will in no time i'm sure, give it time, wallow in your own enjoyment of knowing you have a lovely healthy baby and he'll work through it soon enough.
at least by finding out you have time to get used to whichever scenario, it would be a lot worse to think he was disappointed just after you'd given birth.
maybe get him to talk it through, and you could focus him on on how great 2 little boys will get on and be great chums through the years to come

bubless i used to work at mamas and papas and although very similar they sold pram mattresses/ sheets and moses basket mattresses/sheets. I think it also depends which pram you have though

Forgot to add to my list a coupke of cartons of apptimil just incase and a sling

2blessed your spreadsheet sounds perfect!! I'm normally super uber anal very organised, but haven't bought ANYTHING apart from clothes that actually fit me yet, as I was worried about jumping the gun/paying for house renovations/my 30th birthday, but I want to try to spread cost a bit. Was thinking we could get as much as possible second hand, or as christmas presents immediately after the birth for those things that aren't strictly essential on day one. will be off this evening to make one..

ellie belle good luck for your scan!

anne congrats - we're team blue too..

blackcurrents sorry I can't be more useful being a first timer - your DH sounds like he's a great dad though and willl get used to the idea quite fast. I'm sure given a week or so he'll be happy thinking of two boys who can have such a great time being in cahoots together?

WeeJo If a baby is in SCBU and tube fed you would need to express then (unlikely unless any known problems). You might have some problems in one nipple/breast ie infection/cracks/pain and just want to give it a break from the baby suckling so use a pump to keep your supply going. You can keep in in the fridge or up to five days and the freezer for up to six months. No one can tell you if introducing a bottle once a day before six weeks with definitely cause a problem, if you do want to so DH/P can help then you might want to express whilst they are doing this so your body doesn't think the baby has dropped a feed. It can be confusing for some babies, drinking from a bottle is easier to start with so they might refuse the breast after, some babies are fine though.

I hope that makes sense, sorry for the lack of paragraphs

2blessed just my experience but top and tail bowls are a massive waste of time/money (ok not a huge amount of money but a pack of nappies worth prob) just use a normal bowl of water to wash babies face or wash babies face with the bath water before you put baby in the bath (while wrapped in a towel)

I fell over while walking my friends dog earlier, thankfully fell on my arse not tummy but the kids are really worried, I've had a few twingy pains since so I'm having a lay down to see if I can get tadpole moving. If I can't I might phone labour ward/midwife and see what they say.

Just come back from my scan ladies.

Its a boy, had a feeling it was bought boys stuff at 16 weeks.

He was playing with his willy... So i hope it dont become a habit!!!!

Very happy!!

Ah yay two more boys to add!! Is it silly that I'm thinking because there's been so many boys on here mine might not be?!

Stacey sorry you fell over, I'm sure everything's fine but definitely give a ring if you're worried. I always nearly fall down when I'm holding dd's hand and she falls over - no balance!

joins in list making with all of your lists combined
anything else anyones forgotten?!

Yay! :) Having a boy is great, I am very excited to have a pair of them, though I imagine I'm going to have to invest in sturdier furniture, the way DS (2yrs) is going....

I think DH will get his head around another son/ no daughter pretty soon. He and DS are very, very close and he's brilliant with him. He loves, loves, loves babies and said on the drive home from the scan yesterday "I don't want you to worry. You know me: just hand me a newborn and watch me cry and fall in love.." and it's true!

Those of you partnered ladies on your first - just wait and watch your DH's face, it's priceless! Now I just have to cope with "Not Mummy! DADDY do it!" all the bloomin' time!

Am I the only one who still hasn't has 20 wk scan roll on the 16th

Ps congrats on all the scans

Blackcurrants having 2 boys is great. Mine are currently playing in the garden, with swords!! It saves the light fittings. It's great fun, but loud and messy

Stacey hope you are OK

Super news about all the scans, when they're all done we'll have to add up to see if our teams are equal.

Al this talk of list making has inspired me, I'm going to make a Christmas list! Cards and everything, then I can copy and paste last year's spreadsheet into a new document and have a new one for this year. I already have a spreadsheet for baby purchases

Big congrats on all the scans
I had to express for ds2 as he was taken to scbu after birth and I found it harder to get him to breastfeed after as he had become quite 'lazy' in latching on but I'm sure that's not the case in every baby.

emily mines tomorrow.. when are you due to have your scan so late?!

Boys are great, I love having 4. Their really loving too which is nice