Jue in June - Part 5

[milliemuffin]

2nd trimesters here we come...

ahhh jasmine that is really terrible, i hope he changes his mind, i know my DP also has a tendency to put work first and in his mind he thinks he is doing the best thing for us by bettering his career, the amount of times i have sed to him since DD was born i dont care about money i just want u around more, luckily for me he doesnt have to work away much tho, is he in another country? mayb when u have calmed down if u tell him how sad u r feeling and how important it is that he will def be there he will change his work arrangements

Another one who here who has piled on the pounds. I lost nearly a stone during my stint in hospital but I have put it all back on in 2 weeks. I can't stop eating! Going back to weightwatchers after the birth which is what I did last time. combined with breastfeeding I kept losing weight too quickly, at least 3-5lb a week so had to keep eating more and more and more food to slow down the weight loss to a healthy rate. I love breastfeeding!

crumble- u r making breastfeeding sound even more appealing lol think ill be having a csection this time so hopefully ill be well enuf this time round, felt like i was going to die afta DD

Thanks all. I'm working on a backup birthing partner but have a bit of a minefield to cross as my preference (maybe weirdly) would actually be for a professional one and this will upset my mother. There are 2 friends who I would consider asking but they both have muchos kids and I dont want to cause them a childcare headache. Hmm, not ideal but just another thing to consider.
Yes jingle he's in Iraq - I cant accuse him of living it up out there, I think its pretty harsh...but there is no doubt he is liking the work and has more focus on building up his career there than whats going on here.

Still looking and feeling like a walrus...but the dog is here for another holiday so excuse for long walks.

By the way, I cannot recommend curry and brussel sprouts in the same meal...I'm sure you can imagine!

At least you can blame any embarrassing side effects on the dog jasmine

lol curry and brussel sprouts that sounds like an odd combination, that must really suck that he has to be all the way in iraq, i hope he doesnt have to always work there, i always wish i still had a dog when DP is away but think id have my work cut out for me with a toddler, dog and newborn

Wow Bananarama that's fantastic! I love planning baby gear and things, but I normally scribble lists and then lose them.

Good luck today GV

Jasmine that's tough

I'd love to get a dog jinglebells but just can't work out when dealing with a puppy will be doable.

Good luck goodvibrations! My 20 week scan isn't until 7th Feb and I already can't wait, despite getting a sneaky ultrasound 2 days ago. Still spotting here and it's driving me nuts. So is my mum, who still keeps ringing to check I'm okay, despite me telling her over and over again that I'm totally fine and just getting on with it and not thinking about it. Hard to do when someone keeps ringing up and reminding you!

Anyway, I'm sure your scan will be fab!! Very excited for you and for all the other ladies who must have them coming up.

Sorry jasmine, that's pretty tough. My DH is very involved in everything and very excited/worried about it all at the moment, and I'm so glad I can do it with him - but even he has his moments of 'well I might have to give a revision class to the year 11s on the day of the scan'. I just tell him he can do the revision class, but I will also cut his balls off (only kidding). Sometimes it's weird even for me to imagine that the baby in the scan pic is really in my body, so I guess for them it's all too easy to forget how real it is. I'm sure it'll sink in for your DH at some point and I bet he'll be there in the end.

nurse I know how you feel! Put a deposit down on some nursery furniture in the sale at Mamas and Papas on NYE, but have got a £50 voucher for Mothercare and feel totally bewildered by all the car seats/prams/pumps, etc. We've also got £60 in Clubcard vouchers ... trying to find a pushchair/car seat combination we can get in each of those shops and that will fit into our Nissan Micra is confusing! Saw the Silver Cross pushchair with car seat too banana - a friend of mine has it and loves it - but we can't get it because we should really get an Isofix car seat and not a belt one because we only have a 3-door car and it'll get so tricky otherwise. It looks great though.

Can't believe your spreadsheet! I've got £100 in vouchers and a hole in my pocket to spend them, and prefer to spend hours wasting my time when I should be working researching on the internet. Spreadsheets would just get in the way!

just wanted to let everyone know that a friend of mine is getting rid of her silver cross pram it is in imaculate condition and only used for 6 months, it cost her 650 and she is selling with all accesories etc for 250 so a bargain, i sold my silver cross :( i loved it but need a double pram, if anyone hears of any nice 2nd hand double prams for sale let me know :)

Morning all, have been offline since DD buggered up my laptop on Xmas Eve (knew I shouldn't have left her alone with it - she had that glint in her eye!). So I can't catch up completely, except in response to TTL's description of your mother, which is just spooky. She sounds so much like mine, in the way that they repeat back things we've already told them but in a patronising "I know best" sort of way...... it drives me NUTS!!!! DP can always tell when I'm on the phone to her, as I start pacing and flexing my fists.

Anyway, I had a drink with a dear friend t'other day who is a paediatric doctor (and therefore always my first port of call for any pregnancy queries). She said something to me that really got me thinking, and I thought I'd share with you all, because I think it gives a good perspective. She frequently deals with new mothers who feel guilty because they had a c-section, or because they 'gave in' and accepted pain relief drugs, or because they weren't allowed a home birth or an MLU birth, etc. She gets so angry that society continues with the pressure to give birth like women did 5,000 years ago, on a patch of grass in a field with no pain relief and 15 extended family members in attendance, because "that's the normal way to give birth". There is no other field of medicine in which we tell people to do it like "the good old days" - if I have a mental episode no one's going to drill a hole in my skull, if I have blood issues they won't stick leeches on my skin, and yet there's this perception that modern medicine is the 'wrong' approach to childbirth. But what we're forgetting is that, for thousands of years, women and babies have been dying because childbirth is the most traumatic thing we put our bodies through. Modern medicine now saves lives, relieves pain, identifies problems and recommends solutions. So her basic message to me (which I'm trying to repeat to you) is embrace modern medicine, don't be afraid of 'failing' if you accept medical procedures or go into hospital instead of an MLU. Acknowledge than any child birth by any method is an amazing achievement - you've made a life and the hard bit's about to begin. Don't get hung up on the stress of trying to do it 'naturally'. Just do it safely.

jinglebells I really rate my double mountain buggy. This time around, I don't suppose it will be in use as much as last time (nearly 3 year gap) but I do quite a lot of walking so think it will still be a great thing to have. You can get a carrycot for it and everything
I use slings quite a lot as well so often it's great to have the toddler in the buggy and the baby in a sling.

ooohhh slings! That is todays research topic for me!

I'm pretty covinced of the babasling - it looks easy to put on and nice and comfy for bub. Good reviews for the type that seem to tie up and have yards of fabric, but don't really appeal to me as it looks like they would take forever to do up, and I can just picture myself in a carpark getting hugely frustrated.

Any advice?

Hmmm lisacat I've always wondered why people go on about doing it naturally- if you need a c section then you need a c- section. And as for drugs, if they make giving birth any easier then thats fine by me!

Anyone finding walking up any type of incline really hard work? I've not much exercise the last few months but prior to that I was pretty fit. Now when I walk up a hill I'm totally out of puff.

Just got a new car (not new new, new to me)

Clarkiee Yes! I am really puffing up hills and stairs, and have been really since I found out I was pregnant. I wouldn't say I was super fit before and I am def overweight (size 16) but we used to do 7 mile walks at weekends and do walking holidays no problem...

So yes, it's been worrying me a little for a while. Though I have read that the hormones can cause this and since the blood is busy in other areas of the body that doesn't help.

Has anyone else suffered from this?

Oh, and weight gain. I've not weighed myself since before xmas, but at that point, which was 17 weeks, I had gained 6lb, which I'm pretty happy with. Fairly normal I reckon!

Believe me I was begging for an epidural when I had DS! But it was far too late!

However in a way I am glad I didn't have it, as I hate needles and I was up and around 20 mins after the birth.

But I agree with your friend's sentiment, Lisacat - giving birth is not an endurance sport!! If you need extra help for you and your baby then take it - the main thing is that you and your baby are safe and well afterwards!

BPrincess just checked it out and you are right can be hormones or due to increasing demands carrying a baby places on the circulatory and respiratory systems. Also more likely if you are carrying baby high or you are carrying multiples. Article also says it completely normal and nowt to worry about . I just find it annoying, especially as I know its going to get worse.

Met my new boss today and had a chat about maternity leave, she said I can start it at the end of the Easter holidays (and get paid for the hols ).

misshoohaa - the babasling does look good. I've not tried it myself, but have had a couple of ring slings and pouches along the way. I'm not mad keen on one-shouldered slings personally (for little babies) as I just find it difficult to spread the weight evenly - and position the baby in them - they are fantastic when the baby is bigger and can be carried on your hip though.

I know what you mean about the yards and yards of fabric in a stretchy wrap - it can be really offputting, but they are super super comfy once you get the hang of them - at the start it can be a bit daunting doing it in the carpark as you say.
I'm a fan of buckle carriers as they are so easy to use - there are loads out there. I wouldn't use a baby bjorn or tomy type carrier now (although I did in the past) - good buckle carriers for newborns include things like connectas here and angelpacks here but there really are loads of different brands.
I do really like wraps for little newborns as they just cuddle them close, but I do recognise how daunting it must be with a tiny baby, never having tied one before. There's a brilliant site with loads of advice on slings in general here
Oh dear - I seem to have rambled on - sorry - I do love my slings

Thanks Clarkiee, sounds like we'll be ok!

Must say I'm getting more and more nervous about the birth part. This is my first and I'm 41 and had a bmi of 31 when I got pregnant. None of the midwives seem worried, but you can't help wondering...

Is there anyone else out there who's in having their first in their 40s and maybe a bit on the cuddly side?

Would be great to hear from you!

Btw, my partner is getting obsessed with 'travel systems' and spent about 45 mins in MOthercare the other day, comparing the different types. He wants that one that's on offer at the mo, someone mentioned it earlier, but like them, there's no way I'm buying anything until second scan is done and dusted adn all ok.

jasmine you poor thing, I would be angry too. My DH nearly missed DD's birth, though not through choice. My waters broke early and they were keeping me in hospital overnight so sent DH home. My labour was so fast he nearly didn't get back in time. I was desparate to see him from the first contraction. Hopefully nearer the time your DH will realise he needs to be at the birth, when it all becomes much more 'real'.

All was well at my scan . Baby was in an awkward position and very wriggly so it took the sonographer a while (and I had to lie in some very difficult positions!!). I managed to NOT find out the sex, though was glued to the screen just in case I could spot something!. We found out with DD but want a suprise this time.

I'm really excited about the pregnancy today. Have told my boss I'm finishing work at 32 weeks!!. Very early but as DD was prem I don't want to take any chances. The consultant went through my whole medical history today and there is absolutely no explanation for why my waters broke so early. Puts me at risk again, but I am hoping so much to get to 37 weeks this time. 17 weeks to go and counting :)

That's a really good point Lisascat. At the endn of the day as long as you and your baby are alive and healthy then who cares how you did it.

BPrincess If the midwives don't seem worried then you should try not to worry (easier said than done, I know!). They will have seen both older and larger ladies give birth totally normally.

Sasamaxx I'm thinking a wrap sling is the best option, would you recommend any paticular brand? And would you say woven or stretchy? I probably wouldn't continue to use it when baby is a toddler so maybe a stretch one? I think I might need a leopard print one

Hi supersunnyday :) I'm starting maternity leave at the end of april because it's the only feasible place in my course. Then have a lovely (I hope) year off :) How about you? And everyone else?

Has everyone had their flu jabs? I was originally against it but having seen the news recently I changed my mind and had mine this morning. I think, with the swine flu in pg risk, it's better safe than sorry.

Had my 16 week mw app today and heard baby's heartbeat Lovely to hear it beating away, nice and strong. There was glucose in my urine though so mw said there's a possibility of gestational diabetes so obviously I am now worrying about that. Have been slightly obsessed with testing my blood glucose levels though and I am always far too low so I don't think I can have it.

Hi everyone, just popped back to wish you all a happy new year. I've just gone back to work today since it happened, i'm feeling better now, am just waiting for my af to come and go so i can start again. and i think focusing on that has helped alot. (plus the copious amounts of wine)

So glad to see you're all doing so well and again wish you all well for the pregnancies and births.

Happy new year Cep. Lots of love xxx

nurse stretchy ones are easier to get the hang of, but only last a few months until the baby is too heavy for them - they have quite a good resale value though (if you buy one of the main brands) - they are all fairly similar - hugabub sell really well on ebay, as do moby (a bit cheaper). If you got to 6mths and the wrap wasn't supportive enough any more, you could always then move onto a woven as by then you kind of know what you're doing. Loving the leopard print lol.

I had the flu jab last week

cep - lovely to hear from you - glad you're feeling a bit better. You have a happy new year too xx