The PESH Deli - Going MAD for Hallowe'en.

[Scorpette]

Tales from the dark side, from a coven of evil hags obsessed with ghoulies. Hellish talk of FJ and puke will chill you to the marrow. Unspeakable horrors from our uterine crypts do creep - but thankfully, we're also having baybees...

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.

UPDIFFED

silversky, the biggest farter, due 18 October (first baybee).
Honeymoo, 3 wees a night, due October 31 (boy).
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6.
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November 14.
ReginaMonologue, knows when all the sales are, due November 20 (boy).
maswera, jungle hottie, due December 11.
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25.
ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 January.
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2.
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24.
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Muser, will she ever stop puking?, due February 27.
Medee, finally over the Haribo craving, due March 12.
Casserole, living on hula hoops, due April 10.
MrsFC, joining whether she wants to or not, due 22 Jan.
Scorpette, now carrying a RL baby in addition to Clothilda and the squid, due 21 May.
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 3 June.
Twinkle Toes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 23 June.

So come on in and leave your broomsticks and pointy hats by the door!

Oh you're so smug cunty - bet you love a bit of rendered meat don't you? Smug cunt!

Booooooorrrrreeeeddddddd.com

Should really think about feeding husband this evening. Can't be arsed.

I would be bored but I'm off to work soon. Will one of you please come on and lay a baybee? Actually... scratch that, as it will move me closer to the top.

I have another MN friend who may come and join us here if that is ok. I'm trying to persuade her that you lot are not at all scary. She has just got BFP with second child but it has taken ages and was not an easy journey. She also hates all that 'babydust' and 'can I carry a cake' bollocks, so I feel she will fit right in around here. Her name is Louja. Play nice biatches!

I hate fireworks. The bangy ones anyway. They make me jump and spill my mulled wine.

I am very very sympathetic to to the sick PESHes, but no more talk of chunks please or it will turn into an Inbetweeners episode.

honeymoney is husband still not on favoured list after the night apart? Tell him you will phone for pizza if he pays.

I really want a large vodka lime & soda. I really do. And having given up all sorts of bad stuff years ago I find myself craving that too. Is this the baybee telling me it 'needs' it???

MrsFC I would normally deny myself all kinds of lovelies due to twatty body's inability to tolerate yeast/sugar/diary. However, this baybee needs choclit, cake and cheese. And lots of it. However, with 9 weeks to go I am now suffering a sugar crash. Figured I'd better get myself into a fit state to give birth/look after newborn so I've cut out all the fun bad stuff. Wish me luck. I'd say have a vodka if you really fancy it. Go on, you know you want to!

The thing is that one vodka needs another one. And another. And another. Therein lies the problem...

And your sloe gin sounds lovely too. I am more than impressed with your determination at this late stage - that is when I plan to completely give in to any chocolate urges. Although as I've said here before - I ate masses of chocolate when I was carrying the boy child & now he doesn't like it - so I think you should carry on for the baybees sake.

MrsFC your talk of booze has practically made me able to taste a large gin and tonic with lots of ice and lime BUT - it needs to be accompanied by a fag...drool...I have had a stressful week, and the idea of even standing outside some shitty dive pub in the dark, wind and rain trying to avoid getting a cigarette wet sounds totally dreamy to me. G & T on its own wont cut the mustard

MrsFC I had plans of exquisitely slow cooked chilli beef for mexican tacos. Beef is still in the fridge and I just ate the entire bag of tortillas with the quadruple dip selection (apart from the yucky cheese one of course). So now that I'm not hungry I think we'll be having lazy fucker pasta carbonara. He won't know the difference.

pollo I can't believe you've given up fun stuff. This must be bad. Looking forward to a spot of new girl lovin. Where is she?

ski I am smug, yes. About having two brain cells connected together and not being in thrall to government propaganda. It saddens me more than anything that otherwise intelligent women have to question everything they hitherto knew to be a fact, just because of some nonsense scaremongering.

Personally I bet it's kiki82 or whatever her name is. Am desperate to ask if she's carried a cake recently. I had a doughnut in my hand earlier and then thanked the lord I wasn't pregnant.

Although in theory I could be - my doc who gave me my depo provera jab a couple of weeks ago was fretting because I had had teh sexy, using a condom, 4 days after the start of the droid. She made me promise I wouldn't sue her if I subsequently miscarried. I mean, she was quite reluctant to give me the jab, bless her.

Woo hoo go cunty you little minx!!

I am having a smug judgey pants row on a smoking thread over there. Some stupidos seem to think that blowing smoke in the opposite direction of your kid is absolutely fine. Fools. This is one thing that makes me really grrrrr.

Ooh - where is the smoking thread honey? I'm just in the mood for a good old judge...

at you smoking in the rain cho, I've done that in my past!

Found it - waded in & said my bit. I look like a total PFB Mama, which I'm honestly not, it's just my thing that I get on a high horse about....

Some of my health ishoos can be tracked back to me basically being fucked up by being around fag smoke nearly all the time as a kid, so it's a real bugbear of mine Of course, that was back in the 70s and 80s when everyone, including babies, smoked, so I can't blame my family, but there's just NO excuse for it nowadays.

My Mum smokes less than 10 fags a day - always outside, wearing a special crappy fleece over her clothes, as she's done for the last 25 yrs, and my parents' house is totally smoke-free - but I can still smell it on her and she sometimes even makes me feel wheezy. I'm currently trying to subtly get through to her that it is a very Big Deal to me that I don't want my baby, esp. when new-born, to be near any faggy fumes, however small (and I don't care if people think that's PFB-ish). I'm allergic to fag smoke and until the ban came in a few years ago, I had been able to go out to a pub or club less than TEN times (yes, really) since the age of 21, so I know how gross it is and how badly it can affect one's health. I know I can't avoid any sort of fume when we'll be out and about, but my Mum breathing 2nd hand ciggy foulness all over her when kissing her and nuzzling, etc. - no thank you. We're so close and I want her to play a big part in the child's life, so it's ironic that she's the only GP that poses a slight health risk. Unless you count MIL's skankery and my Dad's appalling jokes, that is

She was supposed to give up for my 8th birthday, so have pointed out that maybe she might like to give it another go for my 38th...

I know there's pre-preg smokers amongst us and am NOT judging you - just people who smoke all over everyone else, esp. babies and children, like that's their right and that it's a totally acceptable thing to do. I know mah ESHes aren't like that. And I realise how hard it is to give up - am just saying how I personally feel about smoke and my future baybee

To clarify: my Mum does not wear a stinking 25-yr old unwashed fleece. She wears some sort of fleece thingy when smoking outside that she washes v regularly.

I don't disagree - people used to visit my office having just been outside for a fag, and I hated it. And I'm not even allergic. I'm sure the rule is something like no contact within half an hour of a cigarette.

I'm just back from the evening clinic at my surgery for my flu jag, so you may now all shun me and my cake-carrying ways.

You MONSTER. I bet you walked home eating salami out of a packet as well, didn't you? You sicken me, Meds.

I ain't having a flu jab, but that's because I reacted v badly (yeah, big surprise) to one a few years back so no Doc will jab me with a barge pole. Or a flu vaccine.

I completely agree mrs fc and scorps. I smoked like a chimney for years and years so I know what's it's like and I can understand why people do it. It's just that I don't want my kids around the smoke. My brother still smokes and he's not holding him if I can smell it... No way. I don't think it's OTT, I think smoking is utterly disgusting. But then ex smokers are always the worst...
I actually stop breathing if someone is near me.

Hello I am that friend of Pollyputthekettleon. I found out last week I won my baby after 16 long and hard (pun intended) months. Well last week I won my two lines last week and have since have had a bit of spotting which has sent me slightly dolally (though sure had something similar with Adi).

Anyway today I have eaten chorizo (can't give it up - though not chomping through it as much as usual) and pasta with goats cheese so hope I pass the test. I have realised that other AN threads might drive me insane with all the inane posts about "Chorizo" has killed my baby etc etc etc.

Be gentle with me!

Welcome loulou! I eat peanuts but I don't eat Brie.

And I won't let be letting anyone hold my PSB who has smokey clothes, I took far too much trouble giving up to let anyone else ruin my hard work!

My mum smoked 30 a day when she was pregnant with my brother. Though disclaimer - she didn't realise she was pregnant until 3 months before he was born. I would like to say it didn't cause him any harm.

Last time I ate prawns - apparently they are recommended in Sweden - though that wasn't why. I did keep away from Pate, blue cheese, brie and soft boiled eggs (though I never ate them anyway).

Mmm, procuttio pizza. I am stuffed. I am saving the slice with pepperoni on for tomorrow although in all likelihood I will eat it before bed. You've got to love American Pizza Slice, enabling one to eat a different peggo banned substance on each slice! (i drew the line at brie and bacon, but only because I think that is sort of wrong on a pizza)

welcome louja chuck us some of that chorizo will you? :o

I was at a party on Sat where they were smoking in doors (its a top floor flat) Window was open and smokers sit by the window but it still freaked me out. More because the smell was making me feel sick. Anyway I am still in secret stage of diffedness so couldn't make a fuss but I did feel uncomfortable :(

My mum smokes like a chimney, I hadn't even thought about her being around the baybee after smoking. Hmm can o worms as I know she wont give up (has tried many times and just makes her mis) At least she smokes rollies which I don't think smell as bad or linger as much for some reason.

My dad smokes but not very much at all. And he knows he won't be allowed to smoke near the baby or hold the baby for a while after. My SIL was very strict on that. I intend to be as well because I hate the smell of smoke and the way it sticks and I don't want my baby smelling smokey. He wouldn't dream of making a fuss though, I think he still feels guilty that I got glue ear as a child which can be linked to being exposed to smoke.

He also doesn't smoke indoors at home and he lives alone. Means his house is pleasant to visit. He keeps trying to give up completely and I doubt he even smokes 5 a day now.

My Mum smoked when she was pregnant with me, it's supposed to stunt your growth. I'm 5'10"....

She also admitted that she took speed because she didn't want to get fat. If you ever meet me, it would explain a lot.

And she couldn't breast feed me. I am horse like healthy.

And yet I gave up smoking, all other bad stuff and I BFd the boy child for 10 months. Probably needn't have bothered! But she was only 24 and I'm coming up to a scarily big birthday...