December 2010, where we waft about in mat gear eating icecream

[Miffster]

Yo December 2010 ladies, here we go - the mid-point of our pregnancies...and beyond!

GGG glad it's not just me who is dreading all the gifts. What washing powder are you going to use? I was going to use Ecover but if you have any other recommendations for sensitive/baby skin that aren't full of un-green ingredients I'd be pleased to hear them...

Chloe I think it's normal to have moments when you grieve a little for what is passing out of your life and become anxious about what is coming into your life - that is a common reaction to any kind of change, and having a first child is a huge change to parenthood.
Fear of the unknown is also a factor in increasing anxiety about change - I have it too - but what I am holding onto is the number of peopel who say ' yes, it changed my life - and I can't imagine ever wanting to go back to how I was before. It didn't take anything away - it added things. Wonderful things.'

Chloe I think about doing things at times, things that some people do that I can't with the children at the moment but then I look at them and I realise I have the best thing in the world. Nothing can replace them. I can holiday and travel to my heart's content when they're older, either taking them too or when they're grown. I wouldn't give up my children or baby to be for anything in the world. Going out drinking, partying and travelling soon gets boring

Chloe you're not the only one feeling like that. I've felt like that a few times lately, not helped by having two toddlers at home all day. Sometimes I miss being able to go out with DH on the spur of the moment, but I don't miss it as much as I'd miss the DC's if they weren't here. Trust me you will go out again, with and without the baby. The first time you leave the baby with a babysitter you'll be counting the minutes till you're back home with him/her.

Thank you all for being so kind. I know it's a blip and I'll start feeling positive again soon. It's just I think being beyond the half way point has really hit home and it's sinking in that nothing I've ever done before is this permanent. Anyway, enough rambling, but thanks again

Arrghh - I seem to be at the stage where I feel like I need a pee all the time but it's just the baby sitting on my bladder!

when does the nesting kick in and is it good fun or does it feel like a chore? I have been a bit more aware of cleanliness lately but not had a big feeling that I need to clean the house from top to toe! Really I am such a slattern I wonder if it will ever kick in!?

DF I'm sure I felt that at some point later on with my children, the nesting, but definitely not at the moment. I cba lol.

Good God, I wasn't very hungry yesterday and today I am ravenous and have eaten a bowl of muesli at 7.30am, a bran bagel with marmite and a boiled egg at 10am, chickpea and spinach soup at 12pm and now a flipping hama and cheese panini at 2pm. My skirt with a stretchy over bump band was fine earlier, and now the non-stretchy bit of the skirt ie. the fabric waistband before the overbump bit starts is cutting me in half and my bump has expanded like a barrage balloon!

At least it will ram the point home when I go and give HR my MATB1 form at 4pm.

I think I am going to use up all my 2010 and 2011 holiday to finish 14th October, so will be off from 33 weeks. But my sister and I both came at 36 and 37 weeks...

...and we do have to emigrate when Tiny is 12 weeks so I do have quite a bit of stuff to sort out. When are you thinking of finishing?

( I have lurked a bit on the November and October threads to see how they are all doing at 28-34 weeks - it helped me make the decision).

DF I have just to the loo 4 times since 2pm.
I have a sensitive bladder, drink loads of water anyway and now Tiny has taken to rolling across where my bladder is (that is how it feels anyway) so I sympathise.

Hiya everyone - I've not been here for a while but I've been trying to keep up :)

c&g congrats on the wedding and lovely dress, I was going to suggest those invisible cup bra thingies which you just stick on your front but somehow I don't think they'd be enough support for an F cup! Hope you get your date confirmed soon so you can get mega excited

df what an insensitive work mate! my particular favourite work mate comment is 'oh you can't tell at all from the back' said in an - isn't that great way - what is that meant to mean! It's like she thinks I hate to look pregnant so I should be pleased I look 'normal' from the back, whereas I am very pleased with my bump. Perhaps I'm being a bit oversensitive also i think i might be nesting - or i may be crazy as i decide at 8pm last night that one of the bushes in the garden needed pruning and set about it with the cutters, DH came and found me to see what i was doing in my slippers in the garden in the twilight hacking things up! hopefully my nesting will become more productive soon :)

chloe don't feel bad about having mixed feelings, we're bound to be all over the place and not excited 24/7, I def know what you mean about the traveling envy - but I think your DH sounds very sweet and camping trips with a lovely dad like that will be really nice

japh know what you mean about the maternity clothes - I had the day off yesterday and went to a proper city to go shopping and just got cross and tired still not finding anything I liked/that fitted. I'm doomed to spend all of maternity in two pairs of trousers - one of which i can't wear for work. It's quite amazing how disillusional I am with what i think something will look like and how it actually looks on me!

miffster you've inspired me to start looking at baby clothes with all this sizing talk, tiny babygrows are just the cutest thing ever! - I know one of my friends was given a Dior babygrow - how completely mad is that! She said is was really badly designed too. I think i'll get a smattering of sizes and see how we get on - it is really hard not knowing what you're having though so i might wait and buy more after LO arrives, it must make you super organised knowing you are emigrating in 2011, how exciting :)

Also I have another clothes question - my auntie has been knitting things for the baby, do I just wash them in non bio on a wool wash? sorry if this is daft i'm not terribly domesticated :)

Right, also more serious question, I just had my 25 wk GP antenatal visit, I had a student and she was very nice and then the real GP came in at the end, we got to hear the heartbeat again and it was really loud and clear this time and we could also hear kicks when the baby was fed up of being prodded at and booted the doppler! But then I asked about my eye problems as they are still really sore and red and the GP prescribed me Chloramphenicol eye drops and I asked if they were ok during pg and he said yes. So i got some and put some in and just read through the leaflet and it says not to be used in pregnancy unless your GP thinks its essential, which has alarmed me a bit, especially as I've already used them. so I did a bt of googling and it doesn't sound good - mainly that there isn't enough research but that it is a strong antibiotic and does get transmitted through the placenta. I mean my eyes are sore but I'd much rather put up with that than risk anything happening to the baby, so I'm tempted to just bin them - does anyone have any advice?

Grr, I can't see the dress C&G, but only cos I've only looked at MN while at work and that site is blocked but I'll look at it - Love the excitement of a wedding . Wow, 11th Sept isn't far away. Very exciting . And a nice event for your DC to focus on. When is the nect contact visit?

You lot are so so organised! Wish I was... I've got quite bit to get but am not going to go over-board. In the very early days of having the DS's I actually liked / needed to have a purpose to go out the house, so I'll not feel stressed about not having everything sorted out. Mind you I was breastfeeding successfully and had natutral labours so I was keen to get out from day 2 / 3 onwards... Hope its the same this time round. Besides I have so little time these days. Work is manic and the only time I'm not at work I'm with the DS's and the last thing they want is to traipse round shops. I'd like to at least choose a pram / buggy soon so I can start looking for that style second hand.

I do however have some things that I've bought in the sales, but no newborn stuff. All 0-3 or 3-6 depending on the style and the weather . I dont think I've ever used much newborn clothes as my boys have both been quite long 8lb-ers.

In terms of pressies, I got mainly really useful stuff although a lot of people without kids think that tiny babies will spend a lot of time dressed in proper outfits, like jeans and mini-skirts etc... Sorry, dont mean to offend anyone buying this stuff but I've always found front fastening sleep suits by far the easiest things for the first few months. There is loads of time to be popping them in jeans when they are a lot older. If there is anything though we'll get thats a bit unuseable then I'll just be sure I can take it back. Most of my pals have included the receipt in the past . Mind you as this is number 3 we'll probably not receive nearly as much as for DS1 and DS2.

Ooops, sent too early!

Chloe as the others have said, your feelings are so natural. You're right that once you start really showing it feels like there is no going back! . But it is all such an adventure that life really isn't boring or dull. Sure there are repetative tasks and things you have to do and you are slightly restricted but I really think that you can do as much or as little as you feel able too. I had friends who hardly left the house because they had such a rigid routine that there was little time for spontaneous trips out, then friends who would take their well behaved DS out to restaurants until gone 11pm. I was somewhere in the middle and went with the flow, but you'll feel so much more confident about this when LO is here. Something that we did which I still remember was me and DH went out for a drink locally for about 2 hours when DS1 was 7 days old. MIL looked after him and promised to call if he needed me, but it gave us a chance to chat without DS there. I think it was just after I'd had a spell of baby blues and I still remember just that small time made me feel more like the old me .

thank you

Hey all! Im due 1st December with my first, I just handed in my matb1 forms and let them know when I want to be off! It's starting to feel real now!

Have other people decided on maternity leave? Will 4 weeks be enough? Im a manager in a pub and have a standing up job so starting to doubt myself as it was only this morning someone walked into me accidentally whilst rushing about!

I too just handed in my MATB1 form! Tiny will be due on 14th December, so I said I would work until end of October, so take all of November off and will have 6 weeks before he is born ( if he arrives on schedule). I suppose he could easily arrive early or late so at least I hope to get some time off and with emigrating too I will need the time to prep.

The lady I saw was lovely and said that if I needed to go earlier, I should get signed off sick rather than start mat leave early. Which was very good of her.

We have a fab package - 20 weeks full pay and 19 weeks SMP and can take up to a year off, and if you leave work, you don't have to pay back the extra mat pay.

'All female employees, regardless of length of service, are entitled to 26 weeks Ordinary Maternity Leave (?OML?) and Additional Maternity Leave (?AML?) for a further 26 weeks. Therefore the total length of maternity leave is up to 52 weeks'

Which is awesome, sadly, as we'll be leaving the UK end of March, I won't get to claim any of the SMP at all. I will have to leave the UK and all its benefits for tax reasons. So after working 16 years in my industry, I don't get to take advantage of the paid time off! But I do get 3 months full pay until we leave - just as well as OH is talking about finishing his job in December and spending Jan Feb and March with me and the baby at home, before we all set off to the new job in the new country.

kittybump not sure about the eyedrops, I think I would stop using them and ask the DR about the risks.

I just got my MATB1 form, so will hand it in tomorrow I guess? I'm working until 22nd of November (due date 11th Dec), not sure if I have to do anything re maternity pay or do I let HR get on with it all.

Saw the midwife today who measured me at 29 weeks!!!!!!!!!!! says she will see me in 2 weeks and then if I am still big (I should be just over 24) she will send me for a growth scan! I knew I was massive and everyone was just being kind when they said I wasn't.

oh and, I am really worried about my SIL. She has her 12 week scan today and I've not heard from her to say everything is ok. Fingers crossed it's all good.

DF hope you hear from sil soon.

Had a shit day, poor kids are so stressed still and dd started self harming again today and saying she wants to kill herself again because of it...just when she was starting to get a bit better as well, back to square one. Hope that bastard is happy with himself.

Not sure if anyone else has seen but reduced carseat just ordered one myself but should be quick!

Have heard from SIL. Am really annoyed on her behalf. She went to the 12 weeks scan only to have the sonogropher tell her the nuchal fold was thick. Thing is she really wasn't expecting them to do any measurements or to be told that there might be a problem; was just expecting it to be a dating scan. She has a proper Nuchal test booked for later this week with bloods so hopefully it will be more accurate. I am just so annoyed because they have given her something to worry about at a scan where she wasn't expecting to be told anything other than the EDD.

Oh, poor SIL.
The sonographer should have kept trap shut.

well yes. I am really pissed off on her behalf as the nuchal isn't part of the NHS scan here. I have no idea why on earth they would have measured it in isolation when they don't offer the bloods at the same time and don't look for a nasal bone. It's just more worry for a really lovely person who has been through a bit of a journey to get to this stage and franly doesn't need it :(

Morning all, Sorry not been around much.

DF thats really scary for your poor SIL hope she gets good news.

re Mat leave - Im expecting to work right up until baby is born (due dec 1st) and have off until Feb 4th - as thats when term starts again. However, I am only part time... so that will be fine Im sure.

26 weeks!!! I have a lovely large bump, havent been brave enough to weigh myself in the last 3 weeks since we've moved though. I had put on over a stone at that point all ready.

How is everyone elses weight gain?

I was wondering about weight gain too OnlyWantsOne
I weighed myself this morning and have put on a stone. I am 23 weeks. I think most of that went on fairly early as I was just so hungry but my appetite seems to have stabilised now.

Re: mat leave. I'm self employed so am planning on carrying on as late as possible and then seeing what I feel like doing after the baby is born. I can claim statutory mat pay of around £500 a month for I think nine months, but don't think I will take that long. I've got no idea if I'll be able to fit work around the baby or if this is a bit of a fantasy! I work from home so I don't think it's too unrealistic to think I could carry on.

C&G just wanted to say how sorry I am to hear your daughter is self-harming again. I hope you are all ok?

I have put on a stone and since the Midwife told me I am measuring 29 weeks when I should be 24 I am hoping that it's just fluid rather than a big baby!

would like to say hi to all the December mums,i have 4 children of my own and my daughter is due Christmas eve,it is her first baby,and iam going in with her and her partner for the delivery,cant wait..

she had her 20 week scan on saturday,well she is 22+,she asked the sex,and was told it was a little boy my daughter said,are you sure and was told,yes defently,he has flashed his willy about 6 times lol..

my youngest is now 12,and is looking forward to being an uncle..