Tips for when you miss them

[morningtrain]

I’m having a real wave of yearning for my dm who died a few weeks back. I can’t shake it. I’m trying to sit in it & feel it but it’s not enough..yet I don’t feel like crying!?! I can’t cry.. (I have cried a lot in the early days) anyone else experience this? Any tips for soothing the ache? It is gnawing away at me. Thank you xxx

It's so difficult isn't it , I lost both my parents and my Dh ( years apart ) for a long time I wrote stuff down , sometimes it was stuff I wanted to tell or ask them
Other times it was about how I miss them or simple stuff like what I'd done that day.

It takes a long time and I still want to talk to them at times ( my dm died 18 yrs ago )
Time does make it easier to cope but you will always still miss her.
There is no right way to grieve, so days will be good some will be bad , try to take each day one at a time .

The company, the chats and advice. She was always there.

Sorry for your loss.

I obviously don't know your location and I also realise this isn't for everyone, but have a look at this post: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/bereavement/5571658-letters-to-loved-ones-post-box-scheme

You could also just write a letter to your Mum and seal it, if that would help.

I cried every day for the first 2 weeks, then I felt 'numb' and as though I was on 'auto-pilot'. Then the 'reminders' started, a smell, seeing a favourite food, hearing a similar laugh, a song on the radio...... it's brutal sometimes.

What got me through the worst months? Writing. I wrote a diary of memories and things I wanted to say. I haven't re-read it. I probably won't.

As time went on and all the anniversary dates passed by, I started to celebrate their life rather than dwelling on it; so I always do something special to honour them on birthdays, Christmas and the anniversary of the date they passed away.

I personally don't think time heals, I just accept it has happened and there was nothing I could do to change it.

You'll always miss them but they are always with you xx

💐