Well, Fathers Day can eff right off

[Emmeline1894]

Anyone else?! Dad died recently, I miss him terribly, and I’m finding myself cringeing at Fathers Day displays in shops. Anyone want to join me in steadfastly ignoring Fathers Day?

Yep! My Dad was buried on Monday. Hate seeing fathers day gifts in shops. Thinking to go to his grave with my sister on Sunday

Hi @Fajita123 I’m sorry for your loss. My friend (who also lost her dad, a few years ago now) is taking her mum out for the day. Am considering this - and apologies if you don’t have your mum.

I lost my Dad 16 months ago, seeing all the cards and adverts for it just feels like a kick in the teeth all over again. I miss my Dad so much.

Yep, lost my Dad in January, it makes me sad knowing I will never send him another card 😪

I lost my dad in February, he had an aggressive brain tumour. It's also his birthday next week so I'm feeling quite low and missing him at the moment.

@cryinglaughing @got2b it’s just agony , the shops are like a bloody assault course. I want to knock over the stands with all the cards loudly proclaiming’Dad’! He was never actually bothered about cards and I rarely got him one actually. His birthday was last week, so we combined the two. But just the fact I now can’t gives me the rage. I just want it over so all the griefbombs are easier to dodge…

@JellyWellyBoots similar - you’re not alone. It’s awful. I’m sorry for your loss of your lovely dad. Maybe we should have an alternative Father’s Day thread on here to talk about our lovely Dads? Mine was a legend

I keep trying to remember my Dad would tell me not to be so soft and it's just a money grabbing day for businesses. My ILs have actually sorted out gifts from DC because they knew it would be hard for me which I appreciate. I'd kind of like to just ignore the day if I can but DH still deserves to be made a fuss of.

I lost my Dad about 16 months ago and it's still so so raw.

I'm trying to keep a brave face on for our DC and DH as I don't want to ruin what they've got planned but I truthfully want to spend the day in bed crying with the duvet over my head.

I'm so sorry there are so many of us.

Mine too - he knew I loved him every single day. Still a kicker in those shops though, it was a quick run to Tesco Express tonight that got me thinking. Because I suddenly, just for a second, wanted to kick the card stand over. I didn’t - but was a satisfying thought

Thanks for this, it's instantly made me feel less alone. Lost my Dad in January. It was an additional kick in the teeth when I realised that the day after father's day marks 6 months since he passed :(
I've planned a few treats for my OH on the day. I'm going to do fun things with the kids and raise a glass to my Dad. I'm dreading all the social media posts too :/

My DH died 3 years ago so it's a difficult time for me and my son. It's also his birthday. We will visit him with fresh flowers 💐 on Sunday.

I had the same urge in Tesco yesterday. I could have gladly sent the display flying. I've unsubscribed to lots of emails about Father's Day too.

It seems every time I just get on an even keel something comes along to remind me he's gone then I feel back to square one missing him.

I am a sorry for your loss. I know what you mean, this year we lost mum a week before Mother’s Day her birthday was a week later. Mind yourself and by all means avoid what you can 💐

“I keep trying to remember my Dad would tell me not to be so soft and it's just a money grabbing day for businesses.”

This made me smile because it’s what my dad thought. It was people that mattered to him, not hallmark days. He died 2 years ago and was such a loving man. Father’s Day doesn’t bother me because it didn’t mean anything to him.

Oh God @YearsofYears you’re right - am keeping off social media. I’m glad we’re not alone and I hope people find other people on this thread. You can’t really talk about it but my friends are merrily seeing their Dads this weekend and it’s hard. Hope Sunday is as ok as it can be for you and your boy @vickibee / I’m sorry I didn’t think of people getting kids through losing their Dads. It must be a hard day for you.

It’s been more than 20 years of ignoring Father’s Day here, and 15 years of ignoring Mother’s Day too, I lost both my parents by my early 20s. I’m sorry for all the recent losses, you have all my sympathy. Even worse in the past 2-3 years I get lots of “do you want to stop receiving fathers/Mother’s Day emails? I mean I do, but I don’t want an email essentially asking me to click a link to confirm my parents are dead, and also, I can’t forget the occasions completely, having in-laws, and being a parent myself, mothers and Father’s Day need some acknowledging….so the dates can’t be forgotten. The stupid emails are really irritating and virtue signalling.

@Emmeline1894 I am struggling too, lost my dad very unexpectedly 4 weeks ago, I also lost my mum to cancer 4 years ago and I'm just broken and lost.
I have a husband and son (3.5) and I'm struggling everyday.
I don't know how to celebrate fathers day for my husband from my son when it's so painful.

It may be too raw this year but you can still find a way to celebrate fathers day maybe next year, I lost my own dad 3 years ago and my mum 12 years ago but I still celebrate both mothers and fathers day, for me it means going to the lovely private chapel of a local abbey and lighting a candle for them, if that is not something you want to do, maybe visiting his grave if he has one, visiting a place where he loved, listening to his favourite song anything that has a connection to him

@butterfly1511 Im so sorry for your loss and how you’re feeling right now, it really is beyond words. Nothing I can say can make it better. But I am a few weeks on from you and so I will just promise it doesn’t always feel like this. You just have to do what you need to get through the day, I think. Fine to remember Grandad too - we will be doing this.

This will be my first Father’s Day without him. He died almost a year ago.
I must admit, the displays and emails don’t really have much of an effect on me. If he was about he would have told me to pull my face straight and get on with things. So I do.

Planting a nice rose in my garden in his memory. I plan to do it every year so my garden will be full - luckily I have a big garden.

@Oldsu thank you, we definitely will. I actually have at least one moment a day like this - but it’s the in your face element of the celebration of dads and things you can buy them which is jarring right now. It feels like yesterday I was with him as he died, and it’s hard to be going about my business and get whacked on the face with Fathers Day.

Thanks @AmazingBouncingFerret (love your username) that sounds lovely and I can only hope in a year I’ll be in the same place. Too fresh right now though, am griefbombed daily.

Yep, me too - Dad died a month ago and I still can't believe he's actually gone. Next year will be easier I suppose. Hugs to everyone in the same boat

I lost my DF in 2018 but I really have never minded Father's Day. I see it as a way to think about him and remember how wonderful he was. My DH is also a dad and I would hate to take any of the specialness of his day away from him.