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Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

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Original poster

Any hope

98 replies

Cotton1 · 10/07/2007 19:39

Hi! I would be really grateful for some advice. I'm suppose to be 7 weeks pregnant, but before last weeks had three weeks of bleeding and Hormony levels only raising by 250 every 48 hrs. I had a scan 2 weeks ago where they saw no signs of pregnancy, then last week they saw a sac, going back on Friday for another scan. Is there any hope?

OP posts:

ladylush · 30/07/2007 13:01

Hello smiles. I spoke to my friend's dh who is an obs/gynae who has worked at the hospital I'll be seen at. He told me there is no risk associated with taking aspirin pre-conception. The recommended dose is 81mg daily but I am taking 75mg as that was the only dose they had at the chemist. He said the heparin should be injected after conception from the point at which there is a heartbeat (so around 6 weeks I imagine. He also advised me to take folic acid daily pre-conception. I have not heard from the hospital re. appt so must chase them up.

smilesattheweekend · 30/07/2007 13:30

Thanks ladylush - it's good that you have a mole on the inside - I think I might start taking aspirin. I knew the heparin was post conception but wasn't aware at what point. I have decided, (well at this point anyway - although i do maintain the right to change my mind as any woman should), that if "it" happens, I will not have a scan until around 10 weeks or so. It is hard getting through each day when you are scared, but I put all my hopes on a scan this time and when I got it I saw the heartbeat and then lost it the very same day, I can't put myself through that again, I have come to the conclusion that I will take all the help and advice offered, ie aspirin etc, but what will be will be.

PS - silly question but does it matter when you take the aspirin or is it just when you want in the day?

Smiles

ladylush · 30/07/2007 13:36

Smiles I don't know really but when we give it to patients on the ward it is always px in the morning (they usually take it for heart probs)so I have been following suit. A banana and an aspirin for breakfast! It is worth mentioning that consultant opinion varies a lot. I think Mrs McJnr may have been told to take the heparin before a foetal heartbeat was detected. Will check it out though.

ladylush · 30/07/2007 13:38

I can understand how you feel about the scans but I think I would want weekly ones next time, because if it went wrong I would want to know straight away. I hated finding out that mine had died 4 weeks before and I hadn't a clue it had happened.

smilesattheweekend · 30/07/2007 15:28

Ladylush - I understand, I had scans each week when I had bleeding with my son and it was a great reassurance. However, I think I have associated the mc with the scan - probably because it all happened within hours. Maybe if I could get to the stage where I could have an abdominal scan instead of dildo cam that would be better!!

Thanks for the aspirin info.

Smiles

ladylush · 30/07/2007 20:50

Yes I can understand that. PMSL at the description of the dildo cam I stopped going swimming during the recent pg as I had m/c just after a swim with my previous pg - of course this was completely irrational but I stopped nevertheless. They say that dildo cams are completely safe but I suppose you never know completely do you.

B3CCY · 31/07/2007 18:59

Hi - went for scan this morning - as I thought - have miscarried. Want it over and done with - they gave me first part of medical management today, am going back into hospital for the day on Thursday for second part. Have now started cramping and bleeding. Feel physically and emotionally drained, can only just manage to type. Don't feel I can get over this, can honestly say I've never been so depressed. How do you cope with friends and family who do not have a clue? It's as if because I'm going through it a fourth time they think I'm a pro and know how to deal with it when the reality is it's worse each time.

LittleSquirt · 31/07/2007 19:05

Oh B3CCY - I am so, so sorry

Take all the time you need to get over this. I know it is easy to say but things will get better, promise.

Sending you loads of hugs xxx

ladylush · 31/07/2007 22:01

B3 I am so so sorry I agree - it is worse each time. I was so so low this time that I thought I had to do something so I booked myself some reflexology sessions. I feel so much better - able to cope. My hormones feel balanced. Even my cm is back to normal. I would recommend lots of pampering hun - even if it's a massage or pedicure etc. You need to treat yourself really well right now - it's not the time to be self-sacrificing xx

hertsnessex · 01/08/2007 15:12

i am so sorry to hear this. i went through the same last march - its still hard today. but time does help - you will not forget this - but you will learn to move on and it does get less painful. thinking fo you.

orangehead · 01/08/2007 21:01

im so sorry B3, thinking of u

B3CCY · 02/08/2007 21:55

Hi - thanks for your messages of support. Went for the second part of medical management today but nothing happened. They sent me home after 8 hours. They are going to scan me again in a week and see if I lose it at home in the meantime. I just want it over and done with asap. I feel that if I can get the physical part over and done with then I can start to deal with all the emotions flying around.

ladylush · 03/08/2007 21:59

I hope it happens soon for you. I can understand how terrible you must feel right now and am thinking of you

smilesattheweekend · 07/08/2007 10:13

Thinking of you B3CCY - take it easy.

Smiles

B3CCY · 10/08/2007 12:53

Hi just thought I'd let you know I went for a rescan yesterday and have miscarried completely so at least I don't have to go in for surgical evac.

Was daughter's birthday yesterday so we just had a small tea party for a handful of friends, I wasn't up for doing anything else.

Gonna start a new thread next week when I'm feeling up to it so look out for it and keep in touch.

Shouldn't be long before I am seen at the recurrent miscarriage clinic and it would be nice to have some banter with all as we go through the tests etc together!

smilesattheweekend · 10/08/2007 13:32

Hi B3CCY - good to hear from you.

My appt at the recurrent MC clinic is 17th September, would be good to know when yours is so we can compare notes.

Keep your chin up.

B3CCY · 22/08/2007 20:44

Sorry I've not posted

Found myself feeling very depressed last couple of weeks. To top everything off have another urinary tract infection (I get them quite a lot) and feeling really unwell. Think it might be a reaction to the antibiotics.

Haven't started new thread yet, don't think I know where I am at with tests and ttc.

Was referred to the recurrent miscarriage clinic after third mc but fell pregnant before I went for the blood tests. Basically I received a letter from them with a load of blood test forms saying that I had to go and have bloods taken before attending the clinic and that these needed to be taken between days 1 and 4 of my period so I just needed to turn up at the maternity blood test room between certain times on specific days of the week. The letter came with a comment at the bottom advising not to become pregnant before attending as we would be removed from their waiting list but I don't think I have been removed because the EPU was at a different hospital. Don't know whether to ring them and explain or just go for bloods when i next have period. What do you think I should do smiles? I'm worried that if I get removed from the waiting list and then have to be referred again and first appointment at clinic could be months away.

Just have this overwhelming need to be pregnant again if that makes sense. (Mum says she'll kick my ass if I put myself through this again without having the tests)Need to know if there is any reason asap.

smilesattheweekend · 03/10/2007 20:09

Hi B3CCY - just copied this from the other thread - been trying to find you for support. Sorry about your hospital stuff - did you get sorted? This was the message I posted on the other thread-

Hope you are OK. It has been a while since I have been on. I have been to clinic and they said there is nothing wrong. She dismissed the idea of hughes or anything like that and said it was just bad luck. She did ask me to take 5mg of folic acid a day which I have to get on prescription, she only gave me a months' worth so something else to sort out!!! Would love to hear if you have had appointment etc. I have started to try and temp to see when I ovulate but there have been a few mornings when I have had to get out of bed straight away to see to my son, so haven't done everyday!! Not sure really what to do. I have taken it upon myself to take baby aspirin everyday to see if that helps. I might print off the research I have looked at and go and see my GP as I have to see her anyway to get a prescription. Don't really want to go to MC clinic again and they have only said to contact when I get a BFP and they will scan every two weeks.

Sorry to rant on.

Would be really good to hear from you. Have looked at other threads for support but they are so long and I don't feel like I want to barge in. Silly I know, but hey!

B3CCY · 09/10/2007 17:26

Hi Smiles

Sorry, have not logged on for ages, cannot begin to tell you how ill I have been lately. Been back and forth to GP with all sorts of aches and pains. Have def. got water infection but think its all down to feeling quite depressed. To be honest things really hit hard this time.

To top everything off I quit work and am looking for a new job and we have sold house-hope to move in the next couple of weeks!

It's good to hear from you. How do you feel about them not being able to identify a specific problem? That's something that I'm worried about. My GP has already warned me that in a lot of cases they cannot find a reason but that's not to say that there isn't one. It's all so confusing. Anyway, today is first day of second AF since miscarriage so I will go and have bloods taken in the next couple of days. They've told me that it'll then be up to 3 months before I see the consultant but at least that'll give me time to get my mind and body back in order.

How many tests did they do for you? Have they def. tested you for everything? I've had 7 forms come through from the hospital for blood samples that I have to take with me to the blood test room this week and only one of them is for my husband. In total it looks like they are testing my blood for a total of 18 different results from the boxes that are checked on the forms.

Need to upgrade my membership so that we can contact eachother directly.

smilesattheweekend · 18/10/2007 14:59

Hi B3CCY - so glad you replied, feel a bit low at the moment, things just seem to be drifting by and not getting anywhere!!!Sorry you are not feeling on top form too. It is a lot to deal with on top of moving house and finding a new job.

Not really sure about how I feel now about the hospital, part of me wants to forget about everything and not think about stuff. I am sure that they haven't done all the tests but don't have it in me at the moment to argue etc.

Like you say it's all so confusing. I have just got AF, at least I think so, just light at the moment but sure it will get worse! It seems like you have a while to wait to see the consultant.

They did quite a few tests, I had the chromosome tests done again but they didn't complete them as they found we had had them done when we were at the fertility clinic years ago. Lots of stuff for Lupus and anticoagulant stuff etc. I had read that these were not definative and could change. My husband only had to have one test for the chromosomes but like I say they didn't complete it as it was done before.

Do you want me to let you have my email address (where do I put it?) or have you put yours on your profile????

Please stay in touch, I like looking at the message boards but don't always like posting as they all seem to know eachother and I don't want to be part of a huge chat, I just like to chat with likeminded people (only you so far!!) - I also don't have that much time to be on the net!!!

Take care.

Hugs

Smiles
XX

B3CCY · 19/10/2007 21:47

Smiles - where have you been?

Sorry you are not feeling too good.

Need to catch up with you but can't stay logged on for enough time tonight - so much to do.

I'll check in again tomorrow to make sure you are still lurking! x x

How do you exchange e-mail addresses securely???????

smilesattheweekend · 22/10/2007 20:36

Hi still lurking around. Would love to sway emails, will have a look into it.

Had a really strange period this time, started on wednesday but really light, I have probably had as much as I would normally get in one day, had thought it was strange and does it mean anything, dont want to think it could be a good sign as so used to being let down. Have lots of things going on at home at the moment so it could be strange, it has never happened before. I have really sore boobs but that could just be AF!!! Feeling like I am still ambling along and feel so so. How are you? Wish we could get to talk more as don't like posting too much info on line. I might set up a hotmail account and give that to you, that way I can access it at work, it is just that if I give my work email they can look at it and I don't want them to know I am trying etc.

Look forward to hearing from you, so much to catch up on.

Smiles

smilesattheweekend · 23/10/2007 10:32

B3CCY - have set up email on Yahoo

You can email me - will check it everyday. X

[email protected]

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