Please join us here if you have lost a parent and need support (3)

[mummylin2495]

Well here we are again on a brand new thread,hopefully we can all move on a bit to a more accepting phase in our lives.

sorry cross post! i am glad that you have managed to try and have a nice day and do some things with your family x

So sorry to see so many new faces x
You will get lots of good advice and hand holding on here.
Mum has also got the lurgy I have - in fact she gave it to me! - but I can't go down later as dh is away :( I will pop in after ds2s parents evening.
Hopefully my sis will go later.

the day is nearly over mummylin xxx

(((Hug)))) mummylin. Glad today hasn't gone too bad and the flowers look nice. I'm sure they do. Did you have breakfast or just a cuppa?
What's your plans this evening? How did the beans fair in that bad storm x

Will b back later tonight my sympathies to all new on the forum. We are here for you anytime xx

It hasn't been too bad today at all. Dh took most of the day off. But I am in a bad mod with one of my brothers as once again he couldn't even be bothered to take any flowers or even go over to the crem ! I have had to bite my tongue tonight as I don't want to fall out . I even showed him the photos and mentioned particular ones that my sister asked me to get for her, zilch , no reaction . I think he knows because I hardly spoke much tonight for fear of losing my temper! Will try and put pic on now.

I have put up. Photo of my mums today. I tried to put one of my sisters too but for some reason it just goes into another one of my mums ! Oh and. It's sideways !

Lovely flowers mummylin. I'm sure they love them xx

As for your brother. I soo know them times and have bit my tongue often. Hope your evening is going along not too bad and remembering funny times and special things. We found this helped when we went through the anniversary of my mums passing. It was also excruciating! We have two dates too. As she had the stroke in her sleep but passed away a week later. Thinking of you x

I'm sorry I've not been able to join in much today as been at work then got in late

To all the new people my sympathies are with you all
As mummylin said it does her easier with time but knocks you sideways too. I miss my mum loads and tbh it's too painful to comprehend sometimes.
I do have a spiritual belief in that I believe she is around me and guiding me. But that's my belief and comfort I also know some days it's not Enough. But I have had signs and coincidences which have been strange to back this up - for me-
Take each minute, hour, day at a time - do what you feel and see who your comfortable with
Cry, rant, talk,
I pushed forward and still do as I know my mum wouldn't want me to be grief stricken and I'm sure kicked me up the back side often and still does! But it also very hard at times.
If really bad times please call the generic number for CRUSE as they are great and 24 hours
Also I had 4 sessions with CRUSE which also helped.
We are here also for you. Thinking of you. It's such a massively hard time. Also maybe light a candle or have a personal space to them to put a few special personal things of theirs. This has helped me to do.
Also read back on this thread as their has been very helpful comforting things what people have answered to people xx

God that was mammoth I do apologise! X

Thank you Mummylin for your kind words. I am so sorry for your loss (and everyones on here). My mum was my best friend and very wise. She always said to me I don't want you to be too upset when I have gone and I am hanging on to that. We have now booked the funeral for,a week on Monday.

My work have been brilliant and have said I don't have to come back to work until well after the funeral and can just start with a half day. I loved my mum so much and I just can't believe she is gone. She was very poorly at the end but the last time I saw her I held her hand , brushed her hair, stroked her face and told her that I loved her. She gripped my hand so strongly and gave me a lovely smile. I will treasure that for ever.

My dad is bearing up really well. It is unfortunate that we live 100 miles away from each other but my brother is with him. We had made plans for mum and dad to move near us this month and dad will now do this on the day after the funeral. My mum always made me promise me that I would look after him if anything happened. I have got my best friend coming over today which will be a support.

I may go to the doctors before the funeral but I am hoping I can get through it without taking anything. I will see how I get on over the next few days.

agnesmum I am glad to see that your work is being so kind to you, the last thing that a bereaved person wants to think about is work. It's also good to see that your dad is now going to move closer to you. I'm sure you will both be a big help to each other.
I think the first few days go by in a strange sort of haze and you just do things almost like a robot. All the funeral be where you live or where your dad is living at the moment ? I'm glad your brother is there to support your dad.
galaxy supermario T badvoc biscuits friendof and anyone I have missed I hope you are all doing ok, glad yesterday has gone. Just another couple of days to go and I will get back on track
I am still,feeling very cross with my brother but he did text me last night to ask if he could pay something towards mums memorial in the paper, he knows I am annoyed with him, I could tell, but as I said I have bitten my tongue because I don't want to fall out over it, everyone knows that family rows can go on for years and I don't want that, I will just quietly seeth !!!

Thanks Mummylin,

The funeral will be where my parents lived. They have lots of friends there. My brother has finalised the funeral arrangements but has asked me to think about writing a piece about mum's life. Well I tried but just ended up sobbing and saying over and over I love you Mum. My ex SIL is helping me find some music and DH is finding a nice photo of her for the order of service. Everything is a blur.

I feel really down tonight but know it will pass. My lovely friend spent three hours with me this morning and she was absolutely lovely. A true friend. My DH is great but at a loss as to what to say to me. My DS2 who is 15 asked me today what the funeral will be like as he hasn't been to one before and I had trouble telling him. I just had the image of him standing there looking at his Nanny's coffin and crying. More than I can bear to think about.

My mum was such a strong person, she must be thinking I am being daft!!!

Hi agnesmum it's so very hard isn't it. Glad you have great support there. Yeah hubby was very supportive with me. Sometimes didnt know what to say apart from I know and hug me tight or I might have just said the same thing to him over and over!! So very sorry :-(( my thoughts r with you. X

Mummylin glad your brother realised how annoyed you were. Still thinking of you. Are you doing anything this weekend? Hugs for when ever you need it x

Agnesmum that sounds so sad for your son to ave to go through. I'm sure he will try to be as brave as possible, not quite a child but not adult either, very difficult for him I expect. I still have a little chat with my mum.
T I will be ok on sat after 6 pm which s when my sister died, it has been like this since she died once that time has gone I seem to be relieved that time is over. Of course I will always miss her but a long time has gone by now and I am used to it. She was actually born on my birthday so for a long time I refused to celebrate mine, it was about 4 yrs before I would do anything. Life sucks sometimes doesn't it.

hi all sorry haven't been about much had lots on and Halloween was busy. how are you all . mummy linn I am glad to see that you have got through the day but will be thinking of you as I know there are more. today is my nephews birthday I can't wait to see him but have had my little cry . mum worshipped her two grandsons I wish she could be here to see him I'm talking finally and be a part of his day

Hi everyone.
Sorry I haven't been around much.
Mum is poorly - just a virus but had to take her to gp earlier.
Will be taking a pie down to my aunts later on.
My uncle died yesterday (I have lots of uncles...he was an uncle by marriage but he and my aunt were estranged for many years)
He had been ill a long time (he was an alcoholic) and it was a sad end to a life.
I am so sorry for my poor cousins - unlike us no one will say what a wonderful man their father was, or how sorry they are, they have no happy memories :(
Sad day.

Bandbox - hope your mum is better soon. And so very sorry for your loss of your uncle x

Super - big hug so not easy times sometimes. My thoughts are with you.
Mummylin. - thinking of you. What are you doing, I tend to try and keep myself busy and get stuck into something when I'm feeling bad.

Are you all doing anything for fire works? We had no trick or treaters so I'm pleased to report more sweets for me ( I mean the kids)

Sorry not sure what happened. I'm sure I meant badvoc. Bloody phone!

got a right mood on me this afternoon. I would usually stomp out to mums to have a bra but one year on nearly and im just realising I can't so im stomping round the house instead

possibly a bru. not a bra

Sorry super but that did make me laugh.. Bra.
I know it's no consellation but rant to us Hun. Sorry your having a bad time (( hug)) x

sent you a pm. its a really daft problem but still bugging me to the point of bad moods . how are you

I'm ok. Not bad thanks! Been chilling in my day off reading mags and catching up on corrie.

Dd eldest is doing a project cup cake project where they are having to do a sculpture and its ended up pretty good! They used expandable filler ( well known name) and its expanded they have painted it pink and built up loads of card up for the base. Looks really good!!

How is everyone else doing today? Biscuits how r u and ssd? X

that does sound good. I have been to town to post a few things then wrapped more Christmas things feeling very organised this year

Well done! I've got nothing yet. Lol I've got hubbies 40th to do yet in November!! X

We carved a pumpkin and put a few decs up oh and ate the sweets tat the trick or treaters didnt have.
What did you guys do? I put a few bits on my mums shelf too x

Hello everyone.
Its been ages since I posted and first time on this thread.
I have really struggled the last few months and just couldn't face posting, I think I went back into denial that my Mum and Dad are really gone for good
My mum's 1 year anniversary is fast approaching I just can't believe its a year since I last saw spoke and laughed with my Mum.
Its so hard to get through some days.
My dc are 5 and 2 and I wish I could say they help but sadly I feel so frustrated with them most days,I just want things to get a little bit easier so I can be a better Mum to them.
I am taking anti depressants for PND but there isn't a tablet in the world that will helphelp my grief.
I didn't have a great relationship with my Dad but he was still my Dad, he died four months after my Mum.

Anyway I feel a little better having typed that out.
I can be my own worst enemy sometimes, I pretend I am ok for too long and then I fall apart.

Sending good wishes to you all