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Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

Original poster

Please join us here if you have lost a parent and need support (3)

999 replies

mummylin2495 · 11/09/2013 12:47

Well here we are again on a brand new thread,hopefully we can all move on a bit to a more accepting phase in our lives.

OP posts:
supermariossister · 05/10/2013 17:24

oh friendofdorothy thats so sad :( sorry to hear about your little cat it is awful to lose a pet. thinking of you

supermariossister · 05/10/2013 17:28

Afternoon all, or is it evening now?

I know that most of us have mentioned robins, and that they are in some way significant to us and a bit of a comfort to think that our missing loved ones are near. with christmas coming up and it being a difficult time for those of us who are missing our parent/s i thought it would be nice to have a little robin reminder that those we love are still with us in our memories and also that there is a whole host of us on this thread who over christmas might be feeling a little alone or a little down so i have spent today making little robin decorations, they are only small and should be on my profile pics. I was hoping if any of you would like to that we could hang them on our trees or wherever so over christmas we have got a somewhat small reminder that we arent alone. happy to post out to you all xxx

Badvoc · 05/10/2013 17:38

Oh SM what a lovely thought! I love robins, always have!
I would love one :)
FOD...so sorry about your poor kitten x

supermariossister · 05/10/2013 18:30

pm me whenever they are all ready as I had a spare day! last year we all talked about robins thought it would be nice to hang one up to remind us we are all here

Original poster
mummylin2495 · 05/10/2013 19:42

I actually have a robin engraved on my mums headstone aupermario . I would love to have one to hang on my tree or even to place on mums grave. What a lovely thought. Thank you.
friendofdorothy I am so sorry to see what has happened to your kitten. How sad. Had you had it very long. Animals get into your heart don't they.

OP posts:
Original poster
mummylin2495 · 05/10/2013 19:56

Oops ! supermario

OP posts:
supermariossister · 05/10/2013 19:58

Grin I knew who you meant, after all who could possibly be like me.

Original poster
mummylin2495 · 05/10/2013 20:11

I guess you got fed up with making stockings Grin

OP posts:
supermariossister · 05/10/2013 20:20

had a short robin making break I've made 20 stockings in the last monthGrin

Original poster
mummylin2495 · 05/10/2013 20:35

You have done well. We have had a robin in the garden the last couple of weeks, sometimes we get two ! I have felt a bit odd today, not ill exactly but not quite right. Got up this morning at nine, made a cuppa and went back to bed, woke up next at 1.30pm !!! Can't remember when I last did that.

OP posts:
supermariossister · 05/10/2013 20:57

hope your feeling better I am shattered went bed at 1 up at 6 Grin like you no reason why was just how I felt. strange things human beings

Original poster
mummylin2495 · 05/10/2013 21:17

I know ,it's have flu , but I don't have that or a cold , just a bit out of sorts. Had a very stressful couple of days owing to a couple of my friends problems.

OP posts:
supermariossister · 05/10/2013 21:44

hope things improve, always here to chat x

Original poster
mummylin2495 · 05/10/2013 21:52

Oh , it's not me that has the problem. It's them . I am just stuck in the middle as both of them have been confiding in me.thanks anyway.

OP posts:
supermariossister · 05/10/2013 22:08

I hate it when that happens. my friend and her partner fell out and split up a while back I had one in the house crying and one in the car I was running between the two not knowing what to say

Original poster
mummylin2495 · 05/10/2013 22:14

Very similar situation here.

OP posts:
supermariossister · 05/10/2013 22:23

its very hard to be the neutral party isn't it

Original poster
mummylin2495 · 06/10/2013 23:16

Hello everyone, hope you have all had a reasonable weekend, and that the newly bereaved are coping ok for the moment.
Found out this aft that my brother flew to Barcelona on a sudden whim for 4 days, this is where we all had our last holiday with our mum. He text to say he was where the pigeons were and that they made him think of mum, as when we were there we bought bags of bird food and you get loads of birds around in seconds. Our mum loved it and I have photos of that, she died a matter of days after. So is a special memory.

OP posts:
Badvoc · 07/10/2013 07:21

What a lovely memory Lin :)
My birthday tomorrow. This time last year I got thrown a surprise b day party....very different this year :(
Am going to do a bit of cleaning for my aunt this morning.

crazykat · 07/10/2013 09:51

That's a lovely memory mummylin.

Happy birthday for tomorrow Badvoc.

My mum's scan results came back, the cancer has progressed slightly which we expected. It's the best we could have hoped for short of nothing having changed or a miracle.

t875 · 07/10/2013 10:45

How awful friend to dorothy, my god thats unbelievable and i can imagine you are very angry jesus christ that is just absolutely horrible, life can be very very cruel. :-(

Mario - Great idea, they are really great, i personally am ok as i have our traditional robin who goes on the top of the tree every year, but what a great job you have done. Lovely!! :-)

Mummylin - make sure you take care of you, you are truly an angel on this earth being there for everyone but you have to make sure you are looking after you! Smile lovely memory you have with the pigeons!!

Badvoc- how are you feeling now?? Happy Birthday for tomorrow, do something special for you! You deserve it!!

Crazycat - Im so sorry the scans brought not good news, thinking of you ((hugs)) must be such a hard time for you.

Well im not too bad, seem to be coming out of the dark passage of grief again and turning the corner but not leaving her behind.

My eldest s birthday preparations have been hard, but her party went well, 8 nearly teenagers in our house!! Crazy at first, sooo loud, but then got them doing soap science and making bracelets wii/e box, and being told 'cool party' by them on the way out was great!!
Hi to everyone else, i am thinking of you all, i don't get here much atm but im on PM if anyone wants me. xx

I have to say the coincidences we have found on this forum is immense, from the music to the same name of the parent, living where we live, and our birthday dates of relatives. CRAZY!

Hi SSD and biscuits and anyone ive missed xx

FriendofDorothy · 07/10/2013 10:45

Having a hard day already. Dad and I went to the funeral directors to sort a few bits and pieces out.

Mum has made it safely back from Greece, the funeral director was saying that she has never seen anyone laid out so beautifully. I guess that is the bonus of dying in a Catholic country!

This is so hard. I never expected to be doing this so soon :(

Badvoc · 07/10/2013 11:24

Yes FOD it is :( I am thinking of you all x
I remember having to choose the clothes dad wore and putting the shoes in the bag...the same shoes I helped him pick out only a few weeks earlier for the wedding.
I go to dads grave regularly and even now I still can't quite believe I am walking towards my dads final resting place.
I still expect him to come through the door at some point.
The funeral was he same...it was utterly surreal. I felt as if I were watching events from behind a glass screen.
I just want tomorrow to be over tbh.
Another first over with.
My mum and siblings have got me a watch - I know because they asked me to choose it - which my dad would approve of. He was obsessed with watches :) the more dials the better :)
I love him.
I miss him.
Life is hard ATM.

t875 · 07/10/2013 11:27

oh friend to dorothy i hold my hand out to you it is horrendously hard pm anytime, we all know what you are going through I know with my mum the suddenness put me and my body into shock i wasnt eating, i was a state, and it is very hard. Take each minute, hour, day slowly, try to get into something you enjoy. There is also the CRUSE general phone line that helped me when I really was struggling, they were very good and helped me a lot. Right here with you. ((((bug hugs)))) for these tough times coming up.
I guess my belief she is around me really helped me and gave me comfort but i also know when grief is so raw it is hard to say this to anyone and i found it hard at times to believe it. I truly believe though that they dont leave us, she will always be with you but i also know how crap life really is too to not have them here physically xxx

t875 · 07/10/2013 11:31

Badvoc - How nice about the watch! :-)

I do know what you mean, for at least the first year on and off it all seems so surreal and i couldnt believe how everyone was carrying on with everything while mine seemed to stand still.

Enjoy though the best you can, im sure he will be with you and want you to enjoy it but i also know this is not easy to do. xx