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Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

Walking together on a journey - sharing experiences, tears, anger and sometimes even laughter. United we stand, divided we fall.

972 replies

shabbatheGreek · 23/07/2013 10:10

This special thread was started in 2008. Its a special place - one which nobody would ever willingly come to. I hope we pay tribute to our lost children by helping each other. xxxx

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shabbatheGreek · 18/11/2013 17:02

Hello missus......'things??' Wink 'just another day in Paradise' my friend!!

Hows you and yours? xx

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everlong · 18/11/2013 17:13

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shabbatheGreek · 18/11/2013 17:23

That picture made me feel really sick - hope he is soon doing much better - it looked so painful!!!

Toms enjoying 6th form college, Dan, Em & Lew are doing good and Lew is loving year 1. Mum & Dad are..........peed off with life and not very well at all xxx

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everlong · 18/11/2013 17:49

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shabbatheGreek · 18/11/2013 18:23

Neither can I love - he is enjoying every minute and seems to be growing up so quickly. xx

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shabbatheGreek · 19/11/2013 06:45

Morning girls xx

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mumof2teenboys · 19/11/2013 07:32

Morning everyone

It's James' birthday today. I love that his friends post on his FB and remember him. I hate that he isn't here to go to the pub or whatever with them.

I just hate it. Happy Birthday beautiful boy xx

shabbatheGreek · 19/11/2013 07:36

Happy Birthday James......wish he was physically here with you but glad that people remember him. xx

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shabbatheGreek · 20/11/2013 06:53

Morning girls xx

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shabbatheGreek · 20/11/2013 11:16

Oh my word!!!

Just watching 'This Morning' - a lady on with a reborn doll - Im not very keen on them - they really frighten me. Kept trying to figure out why I am so scared of them.

When I was pregnant with Tom I was very worried about cot-death. I talked to my amazing midwife and she said she would bring a mattress alarm for me and show me how to do recussitation on a baby. I never did use the alarm. She had a big black bag (which made me shudder because it looked like a body bag) and she took out one of those bloody reborn dolls. She handed me the doll and I still hadn't looked at it. Then she started to tell me what I should do.

I glanced down at the doll and there was Gareth staring back at me.....the doll looked so like him. I just started crying and pointed to his newborn picture on the wall. She cried with me and wrapped the doll up in a blanket and put it back in the bag.

I had forgotten that until I watched the item on 'This morning!'

Sad
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shabbatheGreek · 21/11/2013 19:45

Evening ladies - have had major problems with laptop - hopefully all sorted now!!

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MiaAlexandrasmummy · 21/11/2013 22:27

hello all. Smashed my phone totally, (as opposed to half-smashed, which is normal for me) to the point it won't let me do anything, so I have now discovered just how much I rely on it for - well - everything.

Gearing up for Mia's Ball on Saturday, all systems are go, and I think it is going to be amazing. People have been astoundingly generous, not only with donations, but also giving up so much time and skills to help us make it a success. I shall be wearing my wedding dress, which I wore when I was 4 months' pregnant with Mia.

Some things are turning full circle here, but in a good way. Shabba - do you remember when I had to tell the Tesco delivery man that my daughter had died? It was the first time I had said it to a stranger, I remember you telling me that it was the hardest that first time. Well, he delivered again today, and we talked about Mia, as well as Finn, and he said how happy he was for me. He had told me how he had lost a child, so his words meant a lot.

And Finn is on the move in a big way, touching anything and everything he can reach. There is a little napkin ring that Mia was given, and which she had put on a kitchen shelf, and I haven't wanted to move it, so has been sitting there ever since. Today Finn managed to reach it, and proudly clutched it as he crawled around the kitchen. Again, it seemed right that it was being played with once more.

shabba reborn babies… yes, even without your own experiences, I find them very unsettling. Seeing the CPR rubber baby was a similar moment for me.

everlong that was indeed a very upsetting photo, let alone seeing it in real life. So glad he has had the surgery now, hope the recovery is speedy and smooth.

mumof JAMES!!

shabbatheGreek · 21/11/2013 23:22

Mias - the ball sounds wonderful - hope it all goes very well.

Did you know the delivery man had lost a child as well - or did he just tell you today?

xx

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shabbatheGreek · 21/11/2013 23:24

Love the images I have, in my head, of 'Finn on the move!!' Also love it when our other children play with our precious lost childrens possessions. Really love it. I have sat for hours with my grandson while he plays with his two uncles toys and teddys. Its amazing watching them and always brings a smile to my face x

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MiaAlexandrasmummy · 22/11/2013 00:35

shabba Finn is just everywhere. I find little hands sneaking everywhere - getting the milk out of the fridge, investigating the pantry, playing cymbals with the saucepan lids. Chaos, but yes, good. And yes, it is wonderful watching him play with Mia's toys, especially her block trolley. I'm glad you get that simple pleasure too with your grandson.

The delivery man told me he had lost a child when I first told him about Mia, which was why I did want to tell him about both my children today, because I knew he'd understand.

shabbatheGreek · 22/11/2013 08:39

Morning girls xx

Finn sounds great - I love that exploring age - my Matt used to be a climber!!! Used to find him half way up a bookcase within about 2 minutes Grin He used to sit on the shelf just grinning with my heart racing and telling him to get down!!! Little monkey!

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shabbatheGreek · 23/11/2013 06:42

Morning girls xx

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MiaAlexandrasmummy · 23/11/2013 16:19

Hello. Only a few hours to go until the Mia's Wood ball begins. Feeling very emotional already. I know it will be a wonderful success, simply because there has been so much love put into making the evening special.

As my brother wrote to me today "She may have only been small, but look at the effect she has had on those people around you, friends, family and strangers. Her reach was well beyond her arms length."

All for you, darling girl. MIA!

shabbatheGreek · 23/11/2013 17:03

Hope everything goes really well Mias x

Beautiful words from your brother as well xxxx

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everlong · 23/11/2013 17:38

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shabbatheGreek · 24/11/2013 07:49

Morning girls xx

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shabbatheGreek · 25/11/2013 08:13

Morning girls - its freeeeezing up here!!

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shabbatheGreek · 26/11/2013 06:52

Morning girls xx

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shabbatheGreek · 27/11/2013 10:18

Morning girls xx

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MiaAlexandrasmummy · 28/11/2013 00:04

Evening, or actually, it's very early morning. Our Mia's Wood ball was amazing - a fabulous night of laughter and love, and so much goodwill. We raised an astounding amount. And so this week is spent writing to thank all the amazing people who came forward with prizes and help. I am really staggered by how generous people have been - and feel very strongly that now we must use the money very wisely and carefully to create the 'magic' of Mia's Wood for children.

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