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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Am dreading going from cot to bed....anybody....please help!!!

29 replies

LeilaC · 21/01/2009 20:50

My DD has just turned 2 and well overdue going into her new single bed. I didn't want to do it over Christmas as didn't want her to have disturbed sleep. But, am now dreading it as I'm rubbish when I've had a bad night's sleep!! She's a brilliant sleeper and goes down easily for 12 hours, but am really worried that this is all going to end. Does anybody have any magic suggestions please? The bed isn't up yet, so am planning on doing a grand unveiling on Saturday afternoon, so she gets really excited about it, just before getting into it for the first time! If anyone can offer me any reassurance or advice, I'd be really grateful!

Thank you

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Ohforfoxsake · 21/01/2009 20:52

Yes. Don't do it.

If she's sleeping well why are you changing it?

If it ain't broken, don't fix it!

Lionstar · 21/01/2009 20:53

Presumably she is still in her cot? Can you try and take one side of that and drop the base to it's lowest setting? That way she can start to get used to the idea? We are in this process for our 23 month old. She has had the side off for quite a while, and only fell out twice in the first couple of weeks. She loves it because she can climb in and out herself. We still haven't actually bought her a replacement bed yet though

CarGirl · 21/01/2009 20:54

Why the rush to move her, just moved dd4 out at 3.5, only because we ended up with a spare bed and nowhere to put it!

I always start by leaving the side of the cot down once they've potty trained and start getting up for a wee.

herbietea · 21/01/2009 20:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Woollymummy · 21/01/2009 20:56

don't bother until she starts not sleeping so well or starts trying to climb out of it herself. we moved DD when she was about 2 and a quarter, it was fine. make sure she has some beutiful bedding, make sure she can climb in and out herself, tuck her in or make sure a pillow/cushion lies just next to where she is most likely to fall out, and tuck her in when you go to bed if she/he starts wriggling around.

Weegle · 21/01/2009 20:59

I wouldn't personally do a grand unveiling - keep it low key. Put it up in her room and just casually refer to it as her new big bed for when she's ready. Role play with teddies about sleeping in it. And take her lead...

ohdearwhatamess · 21/01/2009 21:05

Don't do it until you absolutely have to (child climbing out of cot etc). Life is so much easier when they are confined to a cot!

We had to move ds1 at 18 months, and that was when he went from being a sleeping to non-sleeping child.

gybegirl · 21/01/2009 21:07

If you do have to move her then I suggest putting the bed in her room with her cot and letting teddy sleep in the bed for a few nights. I was sure my DD would love her new bed but it went down like a lead ballon for a couple of days. She then decided that she wanted to sleep in it once teddy had tried it out and decided he liked it!
She did get up for a few nights but then settled down. Now (months later) she can be a bit of a monkey getting into bed, but once she's asleep that's it until morning.

mabel1973 · 21/01/2009 21:07

We moved both our Ds's to a bed at 2 years, as we needed the cot, in fact Ds2 went from cot (although without the side on as he climbed out from 15 months old) to bottom of a bunk bed in Ds1's room.
They were both good sleepers and still are, we had no problems at all. But echo what others say, unless you need the cot for a new baby, i would leave her where she is.

Sawyer64 · 21/01/2009 21:07

I am at this stage with DD2(2.3) (I also have a DD1(4) and DS(12))

First and foremost,IME Don't rush into this,it's difficult to go backwards,and if she isn't climbing out of her cot,then wait a while.

I think all too often we feel "pressurized" by peers etc. to make this change,when all too often,its us that wants to start this new step,and our DC's often aren't ready.

If you do proceed,I would start with her nap during the day in the "Big Girl's Bed". I would have prepared her for it,by shopping together and choosing her bedding together,and having lots of conversations with her about it.

If she has her Daytime Naps in it only,you'll be getting her used to it slowly,and be able to see how she will behave in it.It'll also give her time to "get over the novelty" of it all,and let the "excitement" die down before trying a night in there.

You can try explaining that she needs to stay in her bed all night and only get out for the toilet,or when Mummy comes to wake her up.
(I've just bought a Disney princess clock,which is a "bedtime trainer",has a "night" face,and a "day" one)

If she does keep getting out etc. you can try all the usual tips such as Rapid return,Star Charts or a stairgate on her door.Good Luck!

nondomesticgoddess · 22/01/2009 13:46

My suggestion would be to try it for a while and see how you go. Dd was very young when we moved her into a bed - 20 months (moved as she was getting big for her cot and we also needed it for new baby). For 6 weeks she was an angel, then it all went hideously wrong. We put her back in the cot for 2 months and then tried the bed again and have never looked back. That was 7 months ago. She isn't great about staying put for her nap but I shut the door and let her play/read in her room. In the evenings she is pretty good. (Don't want to feel smug though as that's when it all goes wrong again!)

LiegeAndLief · 22/01/2009 14:18

We have just moved ds at 2.5, he was getting far too big for his cot although still slept happily in it (also have dc2 on the way so wanted to move him out of the cot in plenty of time). Am very envious of everyone who has enough room for a cot and a single bed in their child's bedroom! We told him it was coming well in advance, took him to the shop to help choose it, got a Thomas duvet cover and talked enthusiastically about that for about a week before the bed arrived. In fact he even "helped" me assemble the bed although I'm not sure I would recommend that...

We also got a bed guard so he would be less inclined to get out (and not fall out) and so far (only about 10 days in!) he has been brilliant and got out twice. First few nights were a nightmare as he kept wriggling out from under the duvet and I was getting up 5 times a night to put the duvet back on when he woke up cold, so we put his sleeping bag back on under the duvet and he's been much much better.

Good luck!

skay · 22/01/2009 14:26

If you are not ready,... then don't.

My meaning is, if she sees that you are anxious about her sleeping in this bed, and are feeling uncomfortable, then she will be too.

If you are going to go for it, be positive about it, don't let her feel that there is anything bad about it.

Again like Sawyer said - A nice duvet cover that she has chosen might do the trick.

FiveGoMadInDorset · 22/01/2009 14:28

We did it when she started climbing out of the cot, getting a book and climbing back in, we have never had a problem with her in her bed. She was 2.5 when we did this.

DorisIsAPinkDragon · 22/01/2009 14:45

We had a stairgate on DD1's door and a bedguard on the side of the bed, we also bigged it up with new bedding and talking about the big girls bed, so she knew what was going to happen.

Do it when you're ready and not before.

mppaw · 22/01/2009 15:04

My DD is nearly 3 and still in her cot. For the past month she has gone from sleeping like an angel (11 hours) to waking up 3/4 times a night. So I think we are going to make her cot into a bed at the weekend, but like the OP, we are dreading it.
DS has just arrived (3 weeks old) and I SO regret not moving DD to her bed before DS arrived.

So anymore tips from fellow MN's would be greatly received.

CatIsSleepy · 22/01/2009 15:18

dd was 2.8 by the time she made it into a bed...only moved her at christmas as expecting dc 2 in march and at some point the baby will need the cot.

when we got the bed dd was not thrilled, at all, and refused to sleep in it. We left the cot up as well and took the line of least resistance for about a month ie let her sleep in her cot still... but would sometimes read her her bedtime stories in the new bed.

Then over xmas we thought we'd better get on with it while we had some time off work. I had been feeding her the line for a while that father christmas was going to take the cot away and give it to one of his elves to sleep in and would leave her a present instead. So actually when dh finally took the cot down and dd realised it had gone she wasn't phased at all-and I'd been dreading that moment tbh. The first night there was a bit more messing about than normal-saying she wasn't tired, wanted a wee etc etc etc but she went off ok after a little while. And has been fine since.

only things are-we kept her grobag in the bed so it would be as like the cot as possible, which worked really well....except she still refuses to sleep with her lovely new pillow and duvet set (grrr). And she does wake up more-but that's mainly because she wants a wee in the night.

Other than that, it's been a lot easier and less stressful than I thought.
sorry that was so long

LolaLadybird · 22/01/2009 21:22

We moved DD out of her cot at 2.3 as we needed it for DS, she also moved bedrooms at the same time so quite a big change. She came with us when we shopped for the furniture and bedding and was also around when DH was constructing it. She wasn't overly keen the first night but I just sat with her for a bit while she dropped off (we'd been to a Halloween party that evening so thankfully she was shattered and asleep fairly quickly).

Definitely get a bed gaurd - as Leige said I think it makes them less likely to try and get out. Amazingly DD did not get herself out of bed to roam for several months and when she did, we just put a stairgate on her door.

JimJammum · 22/01/2009 21:29

I dropped ds' cot bed down to lowest level, and took one set of bars off the side and replaced with a bed guard. We went to a few shops and looked at beds and he climbed in and out of them, laying down in each one. Then, when we did it, he helped with screw drivers etc, so he was quite excited that night. I just stuck to the same routine as always and we've never had a problem. He doesn't try to get out - just lays there and calls when he wakes up, and is sleeping 12+ hours every night.I would be worried if there was no bed guard tho'. Maybe she won't be bothered by the change. Can you do the cot-bed option....this was the reason we bought one as we thought it would be an easier transition. ps - bed in middle of room, that's why we kept one set of bars on (couldn't afford 2 bedguards).

jeanjeannie · 22/01/2009 21:30

We put DD1 in a bed just before Xmas at 2yrs. She had hurled herself out of her cot one too many times.

We've got an ordinary single bed, nothing fancy and no bed guard. We have however got a soft matress and we slide that out to form a crash mat - plus she uses it to climb up on. She's never fallen out, sleeps so much better and actually enjoys going to bed!

Only problem we have is that she often gets up and roams about during her lunch nap - and when I go up and check on her when it goes all quiet I sometimes find she's fallen asleep under the bed

fymandwhenisthisbabycoming · 22/01/2009 21:36

we put both bed and cot into his room and let him choose - took about 2 weeks to get him in the bed permanently and another two for him to let us dismantle the cot....

I won' repeat everyone else on here even though I agree! We didn't move DS until 2.5 when he was regularly climbing out.

normanthehairdresser · 22/01/2009 21:40

My DS sleeps for England and we moved him not long after his 2nd birthday, on the basis that he could and did somersault over the cot bars!

We had a couple of interesting nights when he realised he didn't have to stay in bed when put down - but apart from that he has been as good a sleeper as ever.

Getting a Thomas duvet cover really helped.

Good luck :-)

nelix2000 · 23/01/2009 10:01

we moved ds at 18 months because he was banging his head so hard on the cot!...we got a growbag duvet cover with rockets, he loved it. He is 2 nex tmonth and after sleeping in a double bed with us on holiday he won't sleep in his cot bed lol so he is getting upgraded to a single as soon as we can afford it as he is cleary no longer comfortable. Had no problems going from one to the other. He enjoyed his freedom but always fell asleep in bed

electricgem · 23/01/2009 16:12

I moved ds1 at 20months because he started waking at 5am and wouldn't play in cot, in room or go back to sleep. Just wanted to start the day! He was never happy in his cot once he woke since birth so unlike ds2 he wouldn't play for a bit. DH suggested converting the cot into the bed form and I was gutted () to see that it worked! (I was convinced it was a daft idea!). He loved the bed (in fact had to be pulled screaming out of it to put PJs on as he didn't want to leave it) and even better slept through to his usual 6/6.30!! If he hadn't have been waking at 5 and if we hadn't had a cot bed (so I could chop and change as needed if it had been a disaster) I would probably have waited.

When ds2 arrived (or just before) we moved him to another room and got a single bed. That was more upheaval as he was attached to the cot bed but soon settled down. We have one with a guest bed under which I pull out a little to help him get in easily (he has short legs!) and also to land on if he fell out (v rare though).
Good Luck whatever you do!

cookiemonstress · 23/01/2009 17:52

Unless she is throwing herself out of the cot or too big for it, don't be in any hurry to move her. I moved DD1 at 2 and a bit because needed cot for DD2. All hell broke loose. My previously angelic sleeper was in and out of that bed bijillions of times a night, waking early, get cold when duvet slipped etc. Took literally months of supernanny 'rapid return' to get back to normal. Those months were a 'dark period' for us all..

I have learnt my lesson. DD2 now 2.5 and since she has shown no interest in climbing over, is potentially going to be in it for a long while yet!

My friends little boy was in his cot until 3.5 yrs and loved and went straight to bed with no fussing about.

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