Are little girls inherently nasty??

[Bumdiddley]

Dh (sahd) told me that dd3 and ds23m were watching the next doors dd and friend play in the garden. The friend started asking dd questions and then mimicking her replies (she had delayed speech but is perfectly understandable).

Dh videoed the whole thing but didn't intervene then showed me the video when I got home from work. I couldn't really hear what was being said and the only time she seemed upset was when they were taunting her about having lollipops. The mum next door eventually came out and stopped her being nasty.

Anyway, I was quite upset but dh said "That is what little girls are like".

When I was 8 I didn't pick on 3 year olds. Is it just me?

Bumdiddley seems to have gone a bit quiet - probably feeling a bit beleaguered. Go easy on her for rest of thread, yes?

Um...I'm back, things to do, you know?

Came back and saw there were 102 replies eeek.

Firstly, I would like to apologise for the thread title. It was wrong. It should have been something like "Dh didn't intervene when dd was bullied."

Boyz- it was a sweeping generalisation and I'm sorry I was so arsey with you. (am I supposed to offer 'hugz' now )

Secondly, dh didn't video next doors kids!! The video just shows dd and ds.

The reason he was videoing my dcs was because he does this for me as I miss the little cute moments of their day because I am at work. DD had started talking to the girls and dh videoed it from the kitchen. When it all got unpleasant he just carried on. He showed it to me after work and it really upset me when he told me he didn't intervene. He said she needs to get used to this sort of thing because "all little girls are nasty".

the remark itself - when I was bullied by my peers at 7, it was by the girls in my class rather than the boys - so I can see where the DH was coming from with the remark.

HOWEVER - I think your DH's behaviour is pretty unpleasant - 1)showing you a video that would really hurt you, when a brief description would suffice and 2)not sticking up for a vulnerable 3 year old. I have a child with speech delay. Once or twice I have had suspicions that a child has deliberately echoed my DS's intonation - but there's not been anything concrete to justify me having a go - but in the situation you describe I would have been livid and would have been rather protective of my child.

just to add - but the rider - that your DD needs to get used to it makes the remark quite hideous actually!

Yes some girls -and boys- are inherently nasty just as some dads are inherently wimpy and dont stick up for their children .

Good on the mum next door for stopping it - at what point exactly would your dh have put the flippin camera down and yelled at your poor little dd to come away from the other girls?

OK, maybe the actual videoing wasn't quite as barking as it sounds but he is still crap for not putting the damn camera down and going and looking after his kids.

I think you're being harsh on teh dh.

We now have a perfectly logical explanation for the videoing (which I am able to accept) and I don't think this was necessarily a situation where a parent had to step in.

I used to sometimes see my dd being pushed around a bit by an older girl on teh back green. I only occasionally intervened.