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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

why can't my 22m dd talk?

105 replies

lucyellensmum · 09/05/2007 13:25

why can't my little girl talk, i see that other children her age are talking the hind legs off several donkeys. I thought i did it all right, im always talking to her, reading, singing but clearly i've fucked up. Feeling V sad just now

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

zizou · 10/05/2007 09:36

nothing really to add, apart from to give some support lem. Presumably the SALT will try and find out why she's not talking?
It does sound like over-zealous professional leaping in, but if you say she was beginning to talk and then stopped, maybe there is something.You sound like a brilliant, concerned mother and I am sure you are doing absolutely everything for your dd. Just keep chatting to her, keep reading to her, keep playing with her, in a lowkey, non pressurised way. My dh's friend did not speak until he was 3.5 and is now head of a multimillion PR company - dodgy politics, but he is a brilliant communicator..

polecat · 10/05/2007 09:56

Do not worry!!! I am a psychiatrist and my DD could say three words (which she would only say to her grandma and not to me!) before she was two. I stressed out and was looking into speech pathologists etc etc, thinking I must have damaged her attachment or that she had some developmental disorder. All my paediatrician friends were thinking I was a typical psych and telling me not to worry. What happened....she turned two and started talking in sentences and now we can't actually stop her talking (especially at 5am very loudly...) and all my friends remind me when I stress about something else!

polecat · 10/05/2007 09:58

I must also mention, I have to physically restrain myself from comparing my kids with everyone else's.....

BerlinMum · 10/05/2007 10:27

Neither of my two (now aged 4 and 6) talked before the age of two which attracted much comment and comparison from various relatives. They now speak three languages - English (at home with us), French (at school) and German (everywhere else). Don't be so hard on yourself she sounds like a lovely, happy little girl - and she is saying a few words. Enjoy the cuteness - you'll miss it when she starts speaking in sentences!

TooTicky · 10/05/2007 10:42

Sorry, doll was a rather stereotypical example - first thing that came into my head.

dontwanttogetoutofbed · 10/05/2007 10:50

at least three of my dd1s friends who hear 3 languages did not speak before they were 2. one boy is only starting to speak now and he is 3.
the more important thing is, does she understand when you speak to her, does she enjoy when you read to her?
Dont be hard on yourself, it has nothing to do with you, and it is perfectly normal and fine.
be confident about the things your dd already does and enjoys as that will help her more then your stressing.
you might consider getting her hearing checked if you think that may be an issue

Orinoco · 10/05/2007 11:17

Message withdrawn

Original poster

lucyellensmum · 10/05/2007 12:12

they don't put the maniacal worrying bit in the manual do they? She said wheel this morning she meant it too because she was pushing her pushchair and grabbed the wheel, and then did wind the bobbin up movements - so proud

OP posts:

TooTicky · 10/05/2007 12:20

BerlinMum · 10/05/2007 12:44

Laudaud · 10/05/2007 12:49

When my sisters daughter was little, there was some concern about how slow she was to speak and the limited vocabulary she had. She was put on a waiting list to attend a speech therapist. By the time the appointment came around my sister couldn't shut my niece up

They all develop at different rates!

rescuepack · 10/05/2007 13:05

Einstein didn't speak until he was three but he did OK for himself

easywriter · 10/05/2007 13:13

Roll with it lucyellensmum, don't grizzle! Silnce is golden as I'm sure you'll note once you realise your little girl is actually talking before she's properly awake with no sign of stopping until she's asleep.

Seriously, she'll get there, everyone's different.
I know several children who "didn't do" things when the books said they should by now. 1) Kids don't give a stuff what the books say (and we all know the kids are all right, yeah?) 2) Every one of those children did what they were supposed to at their own pace. (and usually they had a good reason for not doing what was expected of them) e.g. like not reading until late because they were the youngest child so LOADS of people read to them, when they did read they were almost reading sentences from the start!)

Worry not,it'll be fine, you'll see.

SoupDragon · 10/05/2007 13:21

Oh we were delighted when DS2 didn't talk much. DS1 talked early and hasn't stopped since.

DS2 didn't say much at all til he was gone 2 and then he started nursery and within 2 months was talking in sentences.

I'm amazed/impressed your DD has SALT booked - DS2 (now 6) was referred last September and his appointment is likely to be this July!! I referred him as he has trouble with certain sounds, nothing to do with talking later.

becaroo · 10/05/2007 13:57

My ds didnt speak properly till he was 2.5 and then it was only very short sentances.
He is now nearly 4 and NEVER shuts up...

becaroo · 10/05/2007 14:00

On the serious side, as long as you are happy that;
a) she can hear you
b) she understands instructions and easy concepts and
c) is alert and makes some noises

then I dont think you should worry.

I know that is easier said than done..I was under a lot of pressure from HV to send my ds to a speech therapist when he was only 22 months which I thought was totally OTT.
He talked when he was ready, as I knew he would.

He wont do ANYTHING till he's good and ready!!

boo64 · 10/05/2007 14:27

Any of you with experience of this sort of thing - my ds seems to say quite a lot of words beginning with b - a totally disproportionate number - and a few others?? Could he have a problem with making other sounds or something? Is this normal?

He does say other sounds but just no where near as many. He is 22m

Original poster

lucyellensmum · 10/05/2007 14:34

this last week boo, DD has been saying lots of B words, SALT said to me, when i was concerned re lack of B words! that they tend to do it sounds, as they come, so mama then dadda, i have found this to be so. I guess we should all avoid baby milestone manuals.

OP posts:

boo64 · 10/05/2007 14:46

Hi
I am probably being a bit stupid here - do you mean they learn lots of words that sound similar in clusters e.g b words?

Original poster

lucyellensmum · 10/05/2007 14:53

boo, i just probably don't make myself very clear but yes, thats right - there are lots of B sounds being bandied around just now no real words, she'll get there

OP posts:

boo64 · 10/05/2007 14:55

So do you get the impression from the SALT that this is quite normal? If ds could say half as many words beginning with other letters I'd be impressed!

Olivebranch · 10/05/2007 14:55

Please don't feel sad both my DC took ages to talk.

My daughter started school at 4yrs and she still wasn't completely fluent and the school nurse wanted her to see a speech therapist . HOWEVER, she had a very wise and experienced reception teacher and when I approached her feeling most upset with what the school nurse had said she told me this. DD is one of those children that is a late developer she didn't start trying to talk until 3. If I thought she needed a speech therapist i would have said so. That teacher was speaking from wisdom - 20 yrs as a reception class teacher.

Now at the age of 11 yrs DD speaks beautifully she is youngest in her class (August child) and excels at mostly everything she does. The moral is - that teacher knew what she was talking about. My son was the same.. However your DD may not say much at the moment but everything that you say and do is being stored !!

Trust me you have done nothing wrong and she will talk when she is ready bless her

Biglips · 10/05/2007 15:05

when my dd went for her 2 yrs developement thing (she was by then 2.2 yrs old)..i did ask the nurse if my dd's speech is ok as we cannot understand her half the time..she said yes as long we can understand her then thats fine. Wait till she is 2.6 yrs old...if no improvements then she will be referred to SALT. Just before she turned 2.6yrs old her speech came on brilliant!!! now she is 2.7 yrs old we are having conversations now

She cannot pronounce her F's and V's (and ph too) though but we can understand her as last nite she said " Ninny is making bixs boods" instead of saying "Ninny is making vics foods"...Fimbles = "Mimbles", Flowers = "Plowers", Phone = "Bone", Fork = "Bork", oh and a few "N's" too - Spoon = "Spoom", Balloon = "Balloom"

im happy with her speech and just gotta help her with the F's and V's and a few N's

easywriter · 10/05/2007 15:30

I'm sure I read somewhere that children take time to learn all the sounds in our alphabet. My girls still aren't even close to pronouncing certain sounds correctly but the list that they can't do gets shorter every month (given that they get LOADS of pratice!!).

Don't worry about mis pronounciations, they're so predictable that that'#s why people can emmulate the speech of a small child. (Besides, it's dashed cute!imo!)

blueshoes · 10/05/2007 15:44

lucyellensmum, do you/dh have a lot of scientists/mathematicians/musicians in your family? Apparently, this writer believes there are a group of late talking children with this family background who are perfectly normal (or abnormally bright, shall I say) who talk late: the Einstein Syndrome .

By all means, keeps lines of communication open with the SALT. Just thought you might find this interesting.

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