My lovely HV has been here for ds's 2 year check. I told her that HVs are (by and large)despised on MN.Can you post with examples of their idiocy,especially with regard to breastfeeding? I am going to print the thread and pass it on.

[moondog]

not breastfeeding story, but anyway....approached my HV about constant sicky baby when dd was about 7 weeks old. she gave me the usual 'there there' speil and told me to come back next week if no better and she'd have some more info for me. went back the following week, and she just rushed past me and passed a leaflet to me. no further explanation, no information on whether/when to go to GP, no discussion about whether dd was weeing and pooing normally. Utterly useless. GP sorted it in the end, but I had weeks of a miserable child (and mum), and it really spoilt those first few months together. Still makes me sad and cross, and dd is 3.7 now.

I nearly had a differnent HV for each visit! And of course all of them gave me differing advice on how & when to bf ds.

I was in agony, ds always seemed hungry, and after 3 weeks I gave up. Guessing if I had had sensible advice instead of contradicting advise I probably would have carried on a bit longer. :( Saying that ds is a happy chappy even though he was put on bottle early on. :)

nothing to do with bf but when I took dd to HV for her 1 year check years back concerns were raised because she's very petite and was a fussy eater... the advise (prior to being referred to paediatrician)... 'strap her into her high chair and force feed her!' Needless to say I avoided that HV like the plague afterwards

Someone I know has just been advised to put her almost two year old back in the same room as them to sleep because she's fussing at bedtime. I told her that was ridiculous and to think about getting a bed for the child, two year olds hate cots. HV also asked if all was well at the childminder's "could something have happened?" because the child was very clingy. FGS, the child is with a childminder two days a week and when she is with her mum of couse she wants a cuddle. ooh, they make problems that aren't there. Some have no common sense at all.

My first HV was like Edwina Currie (all power suits and clipboards) and scared the hell out of me and the second was an angel of support and friendship. The first one said "don't start rocking her in your arms, you'll make a rod for your own back". WHAT????

I had one health visitor who told me it was normal for a 2 year old not to talk and another, when I told her I thought my daughter had autism (she was 2 at the time) she replied "Well the thought had crossed my mind but I didn't feel it was my place to say anything".

After dd2 birth my bleed after a few days become discoloured and had a funny smell the midwifes at the hospital didn't check me over and told me if I had an infection they would be able to smell me I continued to bleed and raised it with the HV on 3 occasions who said it was not unusual. At my 6 week check the doctor was more concerned about me than checking dd2 and after swabs ect. I was on antibiotics for 8 weeks to get rid of the infection, and iron tablets to boost my system !

On starting ds1 on solids at 4 months (at health visitor's advice cos he was already quite slow at putting on weight - and I'd fought constantly to keep breastfeeding and NOT supplement despite tons of pressure from midwives and HVs), he understandably dropped a bit in percentiles (milk being more calories than solids!).

This catapulted us into a whole range of "experts" the HV made us go to, including GP, dietician and finally a clued up paediatrician who took one look at ds1 and said "this child has dimples, there's nothing wrong with him - and you two aren't exactly big, are you!" and threw us out of his office (in a nice way)

cant'say anything bad really, but can't say anything good either!! with regards to the bf, their just wasn't any support available, so i gave up and switched to formula.. then felt very guilty and upset.. not the hv fault though

i her defence she did tell me at my first visit before the birth that they leave people alone who are ok so they can concentrate on the problem parents... guess this means i'm doing ok then!!!

also... when ds had his second set of immunisation, she asked if i wanted to give them!!!! ok i'm a registered nurse, but i deal in adults, not squirmy babies and if she was joking i did not lol!!!

OK - picture the scene. Me, looking my best (in irrantional post partum fear of being reported to social services if house not pristine, baby sleeping soundly and classical music softly playing). We begin by discussing my health and I tell him that I don't drink much (2 or 3 units a week as am breast feeding) nor do I smoke and have never been into drugs. On this assessment of my situation he comes out with the following gems:

1. Make it your priority to look after your DH - he is the breadwinner here.

2. If you are going to smoke any drugs (despite me telling him I don't smoke or take drugs) use Jamaican stuff because it is more pure than other stuff so less likely to caue problems.

3. Only take speed at weekends.

My response (refer to post partum madness mentioned above) is to nod earnestly and consider this to be normal advice despite a tiny part of my brain screaming WTF???

Well, whinge away because the health visitor is a dying breed - where I used to work hvs are being replaced by nursery nurses (much cheaper) and the developmental checks, clinics and support visits are being slashed back to the bare minimum and in some cases not being done at all now, due to cost cutting.

Some people find their hv to be a waste of time - so be it, but others find theirs to be a real life saver and sometimes the only person that is there for them in those difficult early days.

Very glad to hear you have good hvs Moondog. Say hello from me!

Rant over.

GeorginaA... I had to laugh... at least you got sent packing with your 'small child'... I kept getting 'is there anybody petite in your family?' - and trust me one of the paeds was at least a size 28 (not that I have a problem with that but she implicitely called me big! ). I'm 1.63 and even though a bit too heavy a doctor should be able to derive from haggard face, my hands and wrists that I've got a small frame... it took me 1 year to get dd discharged. The problem with dd was that she liked healthy food! Hence never developed into a little cherub baby.

BTW they told me ds is a bit on the heavy side... ffs can't please them either way can I?

sorry to rant about paeds as this is a HV thread :) but I think there seems to be a general trend of 'stupidity' in anything child medical related.

my hv was a powersuited nightmare who had no idea about babies - when she first came to visit when my ds was 10 days old she weighed him and said that he hadn't put on enough weight and could be a 'failer to trive!!! (he hadn't lost his birthweight and had put on a little). when it was pointed out to her that i ahd had masitis and this was probably the reason why, she ignored this and was more concerned with form filling. she wasn't any help on other visits either and was in a hurry for me to go to the clinic, instead of visits - despite having c-section and living in the middle of no-where! she never picked up on the fact my scar was weeping infection either......

That is sad ggg.
Pennies,wtf????????
He was trying to be one of the peeps obv.
Ceeerrrringe

I was told by a hv not to give dd1 fruit flavoured yoghurt because "she will get hooked on sugar"

When I get back to the UK I am going to become a HV

so can i take speed at the weekend? will my houseowrk then get done?

When i was pregnant with DS1 my health visitor came round sat down and said " I'm so sorry you have lost the baby". I was huge too.

I'm just glad she didn't go to someone elses house and get it the other way round, that would have been deeply distressing for somneone.

Course it will misdee - you'll get it done in no time and you'll love doing it too!

Actually thinking about it in those terms then speed at the weekend is probably quite good advice. LOL.

right then.

erm, i dont know who my local dealer is

will pep pills and a red bull work just as well?

Don't know but it's worth a shot. Or get a cleaner.

I don't have any mad stories mine are fab. DS1 broke his leg when ds2 was 3 weeks old and my HV came to my house once a week to weigh ds2 and check we were all ok until ds1 came out of plaster. She still phone occasionally to check how we are and never makes me feel like an idiot when I ask anything. I also never feel like she's in a rush and will stay until I'm satisfied even tough I know she must have loads to do I know my boys and I are very lucky. They even ran a lovely post-natal group after I had ds1 and came and chatted to us anh weighed our babies during the sessions.

Pennies WTF!!!!!!

Oh oh oh ... I've just remembered a FAB HV story from a mate of mine from my baby group whose little boy ran around their house and then ran WHACK into the door frame, gave himself an awful bump (potential concussion or cut himself at the same time - I don't remember which) and ended up at A&E.

Came back from A&E and later the HV came round to visit as a followup (as they do) and told my friend that her house was horribly unsafe and that she should remove the offending door?! WTF?! As she said, it was the door FRAME he ran into - was she supposed to remove that as well?!

Priceless!

After suffering with PND for 8m I rang my HV at a really low point to ask for advice. She told me to see an emergency GP to get some a/d's and said she would ring back the next day. The only follow up she ever made was four months later to tell me that she was leaving and that I would be contacted shortly by the new HV!

A different HV told me (when DS was 2w old) that he probably had a brain 'problem' from his difficult birth as his head was on the 99.8th percentile. Not good news when you've already got PND/baby blues. He had had the same measurements at a 36w scan. Needless to say, he just takes after his dad's large head, and it's just the same now. No sign of any problems! :)

My HV is fine, but I've had to see a different HV a couple of times and she's awful. Told me when dd was 6 weeks old she should be going at least 5 hours between feeds at night to give me enough sleep and I should make her go longer. How exactly, force feed her? She was very little then and couldn't take much at each feed so went 3-4 hrs, didn't bother me at all. We also had a scare when dd was about 2 months old and started choking and stopped breathing (I did a first aid course when I was pregnant so was able to slap her back at the right angle etc and get her breathing again) saw her gp who said she had probably choaked on saliva, we did the right thing but don't worry. The HV said it must have been breath holding, because something had scared har or she was having a tantrum - she was lying on her back kicking/playing happily when it happened. I just feel like she wants to criticise me or dd whenever she can.