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Original poster

erections in 3yr old-on seeing images and touching etc

142 replies

ihatethetweenies · 29/04/2006 19:38

Hi, I'm a bit embarrassed to be posting this to be honest but for about 6 months now my (soon to be) 3yr old son has erections quite frequently.
The thing is that he has them when he looks at pictures of woman and he gets them when he asks for cuddles from me (he likes to pull up his tshirt and put his tummy on my back or belly for a cuddle), though not all the time. He's aware that this is happening as he always laughs and wants to show anyone in the region his "big willy"
I've just made a joke of it and we always say to him -"oh put it away" and laugh. I've also started to tell him that certain private parts are "mummy's"

Should this be happening? The thing that I'm getting slightly concerned about is that he is due to start nursery soon-what if he does it to someone else?

TIA xx

OP posts:
Bobalina · 29/04/2006 20:27

thanks alot fish face

SoupDragon · 29/04/2006 20:28

\link{http://www.soest.hawaii.edu/expeditions/mariana/images/annsoupy/kids-easter%20soupy%20closeup.jpg\Definition of a troll}

moonshaddow · 29/04/2006 20:28

oh come on, everyone with a son will know that boys love their willies right? -once they have found it they never let go of the thing.

just like some kids twizzle their hair more than others, or play with lables more than others, some little boys constantly have a hand down their pants -more than others.

you sound like you are doing all the right things by teaching him about privacy, but I have heard of this kind of concern before from a friend (the bit about female images) but the phase did pass.

the main thing I think is to try and enourage social appropriate-ness where possible and to allow him freedom whilst keeping him safe.

I am getting the impression of mumsnet that some people just love to stir up a good row!!

hth

lockets · 29/04/2006 20:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

starlover · 29/04/2006 20:29

a troll is someone who comes to a site and posts things to purposely upset other people, or cause arguments/heated discussion... just general trouble makers.

it isn't peculiar to this site... it's a general internet term

EvesMama · 29/04/2006 20:29

for once i agree with cod!
never mind who thought she/he was what, can we help/advize her/him?

i used to mind my friends dp when he was about 2 2-1/2 and he used to look at me quite un nervingly when i helped him have a wee..all innocent and intereesting to him, just me worried about his action

SaintGeorge · 29/04/2006 20:30

starlover -if that was supposed to be a quote from my post then please read my post again.

If it wasn't then please disregard this post Smile

starlover · 29/04/2006 20:30

i think frannyandzooey might be right though... what we see as sexual behaviour is him just seeing something he likes and makes him feel good

zippitrippitoes · 29/04/2006 20:31

evesmama is that true or a freudian slip?

Original poster
ihatethetweenies · 29/04/2006 20:32

that doesn't clarify to be honest.

Anyway, let's jsut forget about it shall we. I have a feeling that there a few mumsnetters that just like the sound of their own voice.
Forgive me to those who don't but I'm beginning to get very angry at the condescending tone of some of these responses. I asked for some advice on an extremely sensitive and emotive issue. That was it.

Thank you to those who tried to help.

OP posts:
FrannyandZooey · 29/04/2006 20:33

Yup. It's really normal. We are so hung up about sexuality that we think it's shocking to see any sign of it in children. They are small people, remmeber? They show signs of developing sexuality.

EvesMama · 29/04/2006 20:33

"just me worried about his action " = meant to say re-action as in his re action to my helping himBlush.sorry if that sounded weirdBlush

Bobalina · 29/04/2006 20:33

thank you starlover.

FrannyandZooey · 29/04/2006 20:34

Sorry, cross posts. The thread is moving pretty fast!

zippitrippitoes · 29/04/2006 20:34

sorry evesdmama it was the dp bit..but i apologise

EvesMama · 29/04/2006 20:35

oopsBlushBlush..most definatly meant her DSBlush

moonshaddow · 29/04/2006 20:35

hear hear ihatethetweenies,
I will think twice about posting anything sensitive in future -perhaps they are the MN police!!

Original poster
ihatethetweenies · 29/04/2006 21:24

Actually I slunk off offended and embarrassed but then got really angry. Showed the responses to my husband who now feels exactly the same.

So, let me just say:

Rhubarb-if you have nothing of interest or value to contribute, then you should try to rein in that percentage of your personality that just wants to be noticed. You're likely to get noticed for being annoying and uneducated.

SaintGeorge-who are you? Morse?

"my hackles rise and I'm instantly on my guard".

Please, get out more.

To everyone else-Thank you. I'm sure that you are the reason this site was created-to offer advice to parents who are concerned about aspects of their child's development. Without being judged.

OP posts:
Socci · 29/04/2006 21:34

Sad I think some people have given you a hard time and fwiw I don't think you op sounds remotely trollish.

I think it's a boy thing and probably nothing to worry about at all. I remember that my cousin's little boy when he was about 3 used to get very excited over pictures of Marilyn Monroe.

lockets · 29/04/2006 21:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
ihatethetweenies · 29/04/2006 21:42

Thank you lockets. Much appreciated x
(perhaps they're tweenies fans?)

OP posts:
BudaBabe · 29/04/2006 21:51

Sorry this thread ended up being as it is when you were just looking for advice.

My DS is now almost 5 but at around 3 he was mad about Scooby Doo and had all of them as imaginary friends. One morning he woke up and I took him to the loo. He had an erection and I said something (lighthearted - can't remember what exactly) and he replied that it was because Daphne was in the loo with him!

I assume your DS is not that long out of nappies and I think just having "access" is unusual for them for a while. Have heard of similar concerns being raised before but I think it is normal and will pass.

Mumsnet is not always like this!!

mumfor1standfinaltime · 29/04/2006 21:54

Agree with FrannyandZooey on this one.

Ihatethetweenies, I did not see anything offensive or 'trollish' about your thread. I have a ds who is almost 16 months and he can have erections whilst Im changing him/washing. I used to worry about it, but now I just ignore it. He usually looks and fiddles with it and laughs to himself!

I often wonder what he will be like when hes older regarding this, so have got some good insight! lol.

Nightynight · 29/04/2006 21:55

just out of interest, is anyone extended b'feeding a child who hangs around images of scantily clad women?
(which we are agreed is perfectly normal behaviour)

zippitrippitoes · 29/04/2006 21:56

i think it was the association with pictures/images of women that sounded unusual to be honest not erections per se..and i think that is unusual at this age