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How can i stop my dd being horrid with other children.

78 replies

twinsetandpearls · 07/10/2005 11:15

I run mother and toddler groups and take my dd to work with me. I work for a charity and many of the children have "issues" or may not be as well dressed as other kids.

My dd has always been very good until the past few weeks, she has recently turned into a at times unpleasant snotty little madam. I asked dp to come to work with me yesterday to see if he thought the same and he did. If she is at an art and craft table her creation is better than anyone elses. Yesterday she was nudging children out of the way to be closest to me at story time. She swans about the room as if she owns the place. She is alays saying I am cleverer than her aren't I mummy, or trying to dominate toys.

My dd is always beautifully dressed and does get commented on a lot, alhthough I never allow her to wear labels and most of it is second hand - and she has become aware of this. Yesterday while waiting to go into nursery a little girl asked her if my dd liked her jeans. My dd looked her up and down and said "No, I think they are horrible" The little girl then ran off and told her Mum who then spent 5 minutes glaring and tutting at us. I told dd off and said we all like different things and that we should't say mean things.

I can't bear snotty selfish vain children, one of the reasons I am gald to be out of my marriage is to get away from an environemnt of flashy one upmanship and snobbery and it upsets me to see my daughter showing these very qualities?

Will this end? Is it a phase? As my own parents rarely praised me perhaps I have overcompenstaed with my own dd and this is all my own fault.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
twinsetandpearls · 17/10/2005 13:23

I wanted to say thankyou to all the people who took time to contribute to this threas, even the one's I didn't agree with!

In fact especially the ones I didn't agree with, over the past week or so in light of this thread I ahve become much more reflective over my work and why I do it and what I hope to achieve. I have had honest and frank discussions with the people that I work with about me taking dd to work with me and we have made adjustments to enable the situtaion to work at its best for everyone involved.

I have also had a long discussion with dd about if she really wants to continue coming to work with me, I enquired about putting her into nursery while I am working but there are no places. I have spoken to my boss about dd and told her that I ope she feels she can be honest with me about dd and say if she feels dd presence prevents me from doing my work properly. Dd is adamant that she wants to come to work with me but I have told her this can only happen if she allows me to work, I have told her that I know it must be hard sharing her mummy but I have promised her that in return for her being good at work we will take her to the beach for a walk with the dog after work. I have also reintroduced her good girl book.

She was much better last week both at work with me and in general with other children. So once agin thank you and here's hoping it lasts!

OP posts:
twinklemummy · 24/10/2005 21:28

good luck hope its contuines tc

KiwiKate · 25/10/2005 09:41

Hi Twinset. Well done on tackling dd's behaviour. Sounds like you are on the right track.

Also wanted to say that only you know what is best for you and your dd regarding whether she should come with you to work or not. It might not work for others, but everyone (and everyone's circumstances) are different, and sometimes unconventional ways of doing things work for some people.

Good luck!!

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