Why are nicknames so expected now?

[Alltheladies]

Why are nicknames so popular now? It feels like every new baby that is being born in the 2020s is expected to have a nickname. In my experience, as soon as you announce the baby’s name, someone instantly asks what you’re going to be calling them or starts suggesting nicknames (even when you haven’t implied that you’d like to call them something else). Even many parents seem to be more interested in and focused on potential nicknames rather than the actual name.

This thread was inspired by the fact that I had someone ask me if our Charlotte is going to be a Charlie or a Lottie. When I was a child, there were many kids who exclusively went by their full names. What has caused this societal change?

My DC don’t have nicknames or any shortenings or lengthenings. They’re always known by their names. They’re adults now. Nor do DH and I.

I think just choose knowing the nickname will end up out of your control. I loved Daniel as a name but didn’t like Dan or Danny so used another name

Which for me is the problem with giving the diminutive form as a BC name. At least with a cutesy short form the child can revert to something more grown up. Or not, as they wish.

I mean ultimately people should call their child what they want, but I do feel some names stand you in better stead when it comes to professional roles in later life.

To me giving a diminutive as a full name is more the problem than having a nn.

Somebody upthread said a short name sometimes gets lengthened as a nickname - eg Mark becomes 'Markie'.

It's clearly not a recent thing as I remember reading 'Lark Rise to Candleford' (late 19th/early 20thc setting) and one mother was vehemently against the universal habit in the area of giving shortened names to all the children, so she deliberately named her infant daughter 'May'. Only to find people calling the baby 'Mayie' 😖

However, I have to say, I was baffled first time I encountered the threads on here saying 'I want to use the nickname X, what name could that be?' Seems weird to me.

Both my Children have a full formal name. But use a shorter version with close friends and within the family. It helps to create a distinction between formal and informal. They use their full names professionally. But go by their shorter forms informally. They weaponize it to a degree. Anyone they don't like they will remind them that their name is Elizabeth or William. Anyone they like can call them Beth and Will. We chose names with multiple options for shorter names deliberately so that it could evolve naturally.

@Plastron I remember that from Lark Rise too 🙂

I think one thing that maybe complicates these threads is that it isn't always clear if people are meaning diminutive or nn.

To me, a nn is something like Bunty or Tiger or Tricksy.

A diminutive is something like Max or Annie as a short form of Maxwell or Annette.

A nn is something that tends to evolve once you know the child and yes, saying "I want to call my child Mimpsy. What would that be a cute nn for?" is a bit weird.

I think it is less weird to say "I like Annie and am trying to decide amongst the established longer forms if I should go with Annette or Annabel or Anna or just Anne." Or "I like Max but do I prefer Maxwell or Maxim or Maximilian. Any suggestions?"

I specifically chose all of my children’s names because I didn’t want them to be shortened to nicknames

Has that worked?
As said in the post above yours nicknames aren't shortening of names.
They are names that evolve.

I think nicknames naturally evolve. One of my cousins calls me a nickname I had as a baby which died out with other family members but always been called it by him, most other people shorten my name and I do to my kids, DH, siblings and friends, just naturally happens in my circle.

I do think if you like Lottie or Alfie just call your kid that. In 20 or so years there will be so many “unusual” names that no one will care if your son is called Alfie not Alfred.

Yes it has….DS1 21, DS2 20 and DD16 have never had a nickname or had their names shortened

I've got copies of letters to or from my great-grandparents in the 1920s where prople are announcing the births of their children. There is an awful lot of "We've named her Margaret Jane, but she'll be Meg for everyday use" and "he's William John, to be known as Jack."

I don't think it's anything new. As a 1970s-born owner of a four syllable name with recognised diminutives, most people expect or at least ask if I prefer the short version, and always have.

I am with your kids on this one. I like having the ability to break out a full, quite formal name when the occasions demands, while having a shorter version for everyday.

What about at school?
I've found from experience that with many boys they go through a phase when they call each by their names or surnames but add "O" or "Y" on the end.
Robbo
Johno
Marko
Smithy
Smitho
Jonesy
😁