Family trying to put us off a name

[lookingforanamex]

Trying to choose a name for DD2. Been really struggling to find anything we like. We like Liliana (‘-ana’ would be pronounced ‘-anna’ in our area’s accent) but DP’s 10 year old niece has a name ending in -anna (double n) but the start of the name is different.

Family also commonly call niece by her nickname, which is the start of her name, so we thought they might do the same with our baby, and call her Lily for short which would mean there was no similarity at all.

When family asked about our name ideas, MIL was indignant that we couldn’t use ‘niece’s name’.

Later, SIL started sending name ideas to us and asking our opinion so we assume she didn’t like the idea either.

A week later, on the wider family group chat, DP was asked again what names are on the list and Liliana was on there. The next morning, MIL called DP to tell him that niece had now been crying that baby cousin will be stealing her name. Niece isn’t in the group chat and wouldn’t put it past MIL/SIL to plant this idea with her to guilt trip DP and I.

Are we out of order for considering a name that ends in the same sound?

If we are, has anyone got any ideas for other names we might like? Feeling pretty gutted tbh.

Use whatever name you like and ignore them

Based on what you are saying youre not being unreasonable. Its hard to judge how similar the names are without knowing the other. Have you said she will mostly be known as Lily? I mean, really you can use any name you like but I get this will put a dampener on it for you.

What about Lilian instead or even just Lily if thats what she will be called anyway. Even Delilah is sometimes given the nickname Lily. Or mess with them and name her Lily-Anna

This. It's a different name for starters so they're being ridiculous.

Just call her Lily. Your MIL named her own children.
Assuming D's name is something like Arianna, Liliana isn't that close.
Lily is much nicer than Liliana anyway. Liliana is overly frilly.

The next morning, MIL called DP to tell him that niece had now been crying that baby cousin will be stealing her name.
Whoever is feeding this shite to DN/DH is batshit. Even if the baby was going to be named the same as DN, the baby won't have stolen anything. It's an innocent baby named by someone else.

Stop telling people your name ideas. Keep them private until you have named your child.

I would pronounce Liliana as .. Lily - ah - nah .. so not like anna at all.

You could always call her..
Pollyanna
Alanna
Marianna
Rosanna
Eliana
Juliana
Susanna

Don’t talk to them about names anymore, they’re being ridiculous.

Name your baby whatever you like and introduce them to her once she’s born.

Yeah we maybe could have said we didn’t have any ideas yet to save the conversation, but thought it was going to be more of a polite ‘that’s nice’ thing, where they were just making conversation about names rather than them taking it as an open invitation to critique. It’s done now, I suppose.

One of the names you mention is niece’s name (not Eliana as I can see that sounds similar to Liliana) and it’s the ‘Anna’ bit that is causing the issue, not the start so names ending in Anna won’t help us. 😔

You aren’t stealing anyone’s name! I don’t know why they are trying to control what you name your own child, but just go with your favourite option. It’s totally your choice and they are being a bit mean turning it into such a drama x

No one has copyright on names. End of. Next!

They are pathetic and manipulative talking about your niece crying.

It's no different from having two other names with the same ending Maria/Julia, Ingrid/Sigrid, Antigone/Penelope. They are not the same names.

Your family are being unreasonable
especially as lots of families chose the same names
At a family get together I counted 14 Michael’s, all cousins and uncles etc

It’s not like you’ve even chosen the same name! You need to be more forthright and chose the name you like as you have to live with it every day, not your relatives

Just ignore them, they are overstepping !

Why not show them this thread OP

You aren’t stealing anyone’s name 🙄

Although, Liliana is usually pronounced as Lil-ee-ah-na not Lily-anna, so it is a bit strange to pronounce it that way to make it rhyme with your niece’s name 🤷‍♀️ I can’t think of any UK accent where it would would sound like “anna”.

It would be even weirder if your niece’s name is Rosanna, as if you had deliberately chosen to pronounce Liliana as Lily-anna to match Rose-anna.

But it’s none of their business what you call your DD.

Yeah it’d be said ‘Anna’, like I say. The other pronunciation feels forced when we say it, whether or not ‘ah-na’ is considered the ‘correct’ pronunciation. We certainly wouldn’t be pronouncing it that way to make it rhyme - we’d prefer having happened to like a name that had no similarity at all tbh.

Niece isn’t Rosanna.

Thanks for the views on MIL’s reaction being manipulative/batshit, it’s quite validating 😂what’s odd is she is absolutely lovely in the main, I always say how lucky I am to have such a great MIL. Hence questioning ourselves over this!

I could get over the family’s opinions tbh but the guilt tripping has got under my skin a bit re niece crying as no one wants their 10 year old niece to be upset regardless of why. It’s just really hard when we’ve struggled to find a name we like and really like this one, to then feel like we shouldn’t use it to avoid upsetting her.

If niece is Alanna that is quite similar to Liliana...not that it means you can't use it, but it does seem odd of all the names in the world to give her a name so close to her cousins.

I also agree with pp that Liliana is pronounced Lili-arr-na so you've also got the problem of everyone constantly mispronouncing or misspelling her name.

If you like Lily I'd just go with that, avoid all of the problems.

Or alternatively Lilia or Lucia?

Lana
Lilibeth
Liverpool
Lillian
Lilliwhites
Lina
Lene
Eleni
Eleanor
Leanor
Lise
Lidl

@TurraeaFloribunda , I can’t think of any UK accent where it would would sound like “anna”. Much of the UK has accents where vowels are short (bath rhyming with math). - People in northern counties, Scotland and Wales will say it the same as Lily-Anna.

I would also pronounce the name Lily Anna here where I am. Tbh I dont even understand how the other pronunciation works because Ah-Na is how I pronounce Anna 🙃 😅

What about calling her
Lily Anna
with Anna as a second name
They can all call her Lily and you can call her Lilyanna ( or whatever the spelling is 🥴)

It’s not Alanna either. I was trying to avoid putting her name on here in case anyone who knows us came across the thread but I’m not doing very well at it due to process of elimination 😅

The nicest people have their batshit moments. Ignore.

You can call your baby whatever you like. MIL has literally no say. It's not her baby

You’re only out of order for asking your families’ opinions. Stealing a name - what nonsense. Niece is only upset (if she even is) because her family have told her to be. Imagine they had said “Your cousin’s name is going to end like your name does! Isn’t that wonderful? Name twins - same but different.”

Name your dd whatever you like.