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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Can you politely tell people 'don't nickname my daughter'

108 replies

JenniferHart · 02/06/2008 09:11

Obviously you can do it, but can you do it and still maintain your easygoing friendly image. Or would that ONE comment throw your whole personality out of the water and reveal you as an anal freak putting on a show....

JUST wondering.

If the full name is Elizabeth/Eliza (for eg, not the actual name) and a friend you see a lot of calls child lizzy, then that could really stick, couldn't it?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

MrsBadger · 02/06/2008 09:13

IMO if you put your foot down firm and early people are generally ok about it. Letting 'Lizzy' develop and then trying to squash it is much harder.

TillyScoutsmum · 02/06/2008 09:14

I found it quite difficult (but I am useless at any type of confrontation style discussions).. DD is Matilda and almost everyone started calling her Tilly. I quite like it but still prefer her full name (but can see its perhaps a bit much for a small baby ?). It has sort of stuck (as you can see from my username ).

belgo · 02/06/2008 09:15

Just tell them you don't like the nickname Lizzy, and you plan on keeping her name the full length. I don't see how they would be offended by that.

nailpolish · 02/06/2008 09:16

folks shortened my dd1s name and although i didnt like it i didnt say anything

as soon as she could talk she used to yell "THATS NOT MY NAME!" so they all stopped

i am so proud

nailpolish · 02/06/2008 09:17

but tbh i dont see how anyone can be offended if you just say "we dont like it shortened, we plan on using the full name" and smile

MrsBadger · 02/06/2008 09:19

...or do what we did and pick a name that can't easily be shortened

GreenElizabeth · 02/06/2008 09:21

"Do you know a Lizzy?, I notice you keep accidentally calling Eliza Lizzy?"

Would that be non-confrontational?

TsarChasm · 02/06/2008 09:22

Just say. People should follow your lead.

I know quite a few Debbie's but one is a definate Deborah - it's what she prefers.

KnickersOnMaHead · 02/06/2008 09:23

Message withdrawn

shrinkingsagpuss · 02/06/2008 09:24

People will always try and shorten names, but if they hear you call her by her full name, they will soon catch on - eps if you introduce her as "...FULL name".. I have a cousin called Elizabeht - and she has NEVER been anythng other than that. Very rarely her parents refer tp her as "E", and her sister as "MA", but I would never dream of calling her Liz - as its not her name.

kayzisexpecting · 02/06/2008 09:27

I hate people shortening my DS's name.

He is Freddie and people call him Fred which I hate. If I wanted people to call him Fred than I would have called him Fred to start with. Most people stop when I say "His name is Freddie"

MrsBadger · 02/06/2008 09:32

I'd forgive them though kayz - if I heard a child being referred to as Freddie I'd assume his given name was Frederick and therefore nicknames were par for the course.

TsarChasm · 02/06/2008 09:32

All my dc have quite short names. I have noticed some people lengthening them into silly nicknames.

You can't win. I just look about it and hope it goes away.

kayzisexpecting · 02/06/2008 09:33

But MrsBadger when its his Nan and 2 of his godparents they know he isn't Frederick.

cece · 02/06/2008 09:40

We have the opposite problem. DS has a long name as his 'official' name but no one calls him that (except my MIL and school - he hasn't started yet and we keep getting letteres referring to him by his 'official' name - will tell them before he starts though!) everyone else calls him by the shortened version which is what we prefer.

nailpolish · 02/06/2008 09:43

cece why didnt you just name him the shortened one then? my official name is a nickname of a long one = my parents didnt like the long version so just named me the shortened one officially = iyswim - i am glad they did

TinkerbellesMum · 02/06/2008 10:05

If anyone calls Tink "Izzy" I just say "Isobel" to them. I'm going to teach her to say "I don't know, is he?" or if they call her Belle "Says ding dong".

Tinker Belle was my niece's version of Isobel and it stuck with her. I don't mind people calling it her or Tink and most people do.

Our friends little girl is called Eleanor. Another friend keeps calling her "Ellie". Eleanor looks her in the face and says "El-le-nor" like she's teaching her to speak properly!

cece · 02/06/2008 10:07

The shortened version is nicer! but not that suitable if he were to become some fancy lawyer or the Prime Minister so we thought her could use either when he was older.

My dad has a name that can be shortened 2 or 3 ways. As a child he was called one way and now as an adult he uses another!

cece · 02/06/2008 10:08

BTW we do liket he 'official' name too!

Plus a little that people will think that I assume he will become a fancy lawyer or Prime Minister.

2point4kids · 02/06/2008 10:14

I have an Edward and I call him Ted.
A few people call him Eddie which I hate. Edward, Ted or Teddy is fine, but not Eddie!

I never know what to say to them and I usually just consistently refer to him as Ted in front of them and hope they pick up on it!!

2littlemonkeys · 02/06/2008 10:47

I have a name that can be shortened 3 times lol
rn jennifer then i get jenny or jen. But i [hum] when i meet people and they go straight to jen thats only for people who no me really well and jennifer is saved for when iam in trouble lol

When we where choseing our dd's names we also went throght what they would be shortened to so we could come to terms with those names as well lol

I just think its part of the culture we live in today lol

Sanguine · 02/06/2008 10:50

I much prefer giving the child the full version of a name and then shortening it if you want to, rather than giving them the shortened version to start with. I figure it gives them the choice later. We like DS to be called by his full name and never shorten it ourselves. But we had a visit from a friend's 2.5 year old and she dived into his toy basket and pulled something out and said very seriously, "this is Steve's train". No idea where she got the contraction from, but she was calling him 'steve' all day after that. It kind of cute, but steve is not a name I would instantly associate with a 6 month old baby!

TillyScoutsmum · 02/06/2008 10:52

2littlemonkeys - I'm exactly the same (although I "adopted" Jennie (with an I E don't you know ) when going through my pretentious phase at about 12 and I have stuck with it. Jennifer is only when in trouble though

hanaflower · 02/06/2008 10:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

evenhope · 02/06/2008 10:55

My DD1 has a 3 syllable first name. We told everyone we weren't shortening it and with the exception of one girl at school and her mother, no-one ever tried to.

A few people asked us if we used a shortened version and we said no.

Once they get to school and are referred to by their full name it doesn't seem to occur to anyone to try to change it (the girl who did shorten it joined the school in Y3).

DD actually found her own shortening (that we hate) at 14, so everyone she has met since calls her that. It is quite amusing when she has schoolfriends and later friends round at the same time (she's 22) as one group call her by her proper name and the others by something completely different.

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