Can anyone find a middle ground between me and DH’s name lists?

[namepains]

Have NC’d for this

DH and I have very, very different tastes when it comes to names. I’ll give you our lists below, but we’re nowhere close in terms of taste. What sounds nice to me DH hates and vice versa. I apologise profusely if anyone’s name comes up, I am really not meaning to offend anyone but names are very personal and tastes are very different. Please don’t take any offence and fwiw, my name always comes up on outdated/names people don’t like threads for context, we live in Scotland and DH is Scottish, I’m English. If there’s a specific reason for DH not liking mine, I’ve put it next to the name.

My list:

Lily- too twee apparently
Rosie- he’s said he likes it but not enough to say it every day henceforth. He doesn’t like variations such as Rosaline/d, Rosa or Rose.
Daisy- brief period of time a girl wasn’t nice to DS with this name
Jasmine - Aladdin (who honestly thinks that!)
Ophelia- apparently pretentious, although I love Hamlet!
Scarlett
Tara- his first dog was called that so apparently he can’t name DD ‘after’ his dog
Emily
Ruby

DH’s list:

Michelle
Siobhan
Lisa
Louise
Mhairi
Bernadette

I particularly don’t like Bernadette and Siobhan. But honestly, I don’t like any of them. No connotations or personal issues with people with these names but I just don’t like them. Does anyone have any suggestions for a middle ground? I’m not sure there is one! We had a boy name agreed immediately but we’re worlds apart on a girls one

Is he Scottish? Eilidh?

Okay soo

I don’t know who suggested it but I quite like Eliza. I asked DH and he said maybe! Now this could be a palm-off maybe, I’m not getting excited yet, but maybe is better than his usual flat-out no.

I feel like this is a drip feed, but you’ll notice I like names ending in ie sounds or y. Our surname does end in ie

His choices are incredibly dated.

yours are also slightly dated.

so I will suggest a few of my favourites:

Mirrin
Juliet
Jennifer
Anna
Mairi
Mhairi
Kirsten
Catriona

Lola
Carmen
Ruth
Maudie
Julia

If you could tweak to Elisa - which is also pretty - I reckon you’d have a deal he couldn’t refuse: it’s his name choice with a capital E

Elsie? I like Eliza too though - and I think it’s better not to have first and surnames ending in “ie”

His list are def ex girlfriend crushes from school . Or movie stars lol

yours are much nicer .

Lydia?

Has he been asleep for the last 40 years?
His names are comedy gold.

I sort of like Louise and Bernadette though. I know two little Bernadettes under 12 months and I suspect the name is having a resurgence.
The rest are really dated and not in a nice way.

That being said, I really only like Emily from your list, and I agree with his verdict on the rest of your names.

How do you feel about -
Jessica
Elsa
Colette
Rosemary
Roisin (should have fada accents on the O and the last I). I suggest this as he likes Siobhan, another Irish name. It means little Rose or darling Rose. Pronounced ROE-sheen.
Alannah

Jessica (Jessie) Alyssa, Zara, Danielle, Bernie, Ella, Bethany

Your suggestions are pretty awful imo - well, maybe that's harsh but totally not my taste so I can see why he might struggle with them.

His are mostly awful including Louise (I've always found it a slightly wet name). Bernadette is great though and due a comeback.

My favourite strong names with a bit of a vintage vibe (which I suspect will find favour with neither of you 😂) are:
Christabel
Ramona
Andrea
Natalie
Romilly
Joanna
Claudia
Audrey
Vivien
Frances
Marianne

When DH came out with similarly dated names, it turns out he'd been recalling the names of the cool/hot girls from school

His brother outed him for it before the baby arrived who was luckily a boy anyway...

Eliza is fab. Definitely moving away from its Victorian scullery maid connotations. I've also heard Ethel and Agatha used a few times, but they're both a step too far for me, although 'Aggie' is quite cute.

Katie and Zoe
They were the first names I thought of going through both lists! Girlie but not frilly, classic but not dated (I don't think)

If you both like Finn, how about Finola? It's an Anglicized version of Fionnuala.

His names are quite RC 70s Irish.

I do agree that your names are quite 'English'. Scarlett and Ruby are especially so. Emily - I can sort of see where he's coming from. It's a little bit wet.

Would Saoirse be a step too far for you? Would it make life difficult for a girl in Scotland?

Ettie

Ottilie

Eliza is a really lovely name..maybe work on that idea !

Eilís or Eibhlís is the Irish for Elizabeth.

I think Elise is French.

Finnula is another version of Fionnuala. I know a little one called that. Ace name, you can have Finn or Nula for short.

His are 1980s top names, yours are 2010s top names. Maybe get the 2024 top 50 names and compare?

Yes Elise is definitely more European than English.

Lydia
Amelie
Elodie
Melody
Penny
Ivy
Maisie
Elsie
Charlotte nn Lottie
Matilda nn Tilly
Bonnie
Paisley
Connie

I think of the evil goddess in Season 4 of Angel (buffy the vampire slayer spin-off series)

@namepains we had a similar dilemma with zero overlap and real dislike of eachothers favourites. We resolved it like this: we each wrote down a paragraph that described what we liked about our favourite names, without using the names (so eg you might write that you like names that make you think of flowers, colours and light, and that you have a preference for eee endings). Then we swapped papers and had a week to each come up with at least 3 names that met the description on the other person's paper and that we didn't dislike.

This enabled us to find one name that vaguely matched both sets of criteria and which both of us thought was kind of ok, and which we both eventually learned to like, and DC was given 2 middle names one from each of our actual-favourites lists.

Omg that was on our shortlist! Fabulous name!

What about Finne? Or Fiadh/Fia?

For what it's worth, I'm not a fan of either lists but like his marginally better. Except for Bernadette. But that's due to a horrible French teacher with an obsession with St Bernadette. Teacher was a nun obviously.