Anyone ever recovered from a "stolen" baby name?

[bee2121]

I did the biggest mistake of my life by giving a true answer when a co-worker asked what baby names I like. I was caught off gard and I am a terrible liar. She is not going to have children so I was like whatever, better just say it as it is. Unfortunately another co-worker where closer than I though, she walked in just seconds later, my guess is that she overheard us because a few months later she announces she is pregnant and guess what name her baby got? My name!

If it where to be a common name I wouldn't have batted an eyebrow, but knowing she overheard us and the fact that it's a very uncommon name (but still old/classic, not a weird name) makes me believe she "stole" it.

I know the fault is mine for sharing in the first place, but it was hard not to feel a jab in the heart when I heard the name for the first time. She spelled it slightly different but it is pronounced exactly the same. I didn't confront her but man did it sting in my baby-longing heart.

I no longer work there, but I did for about a year after her baby arrived.

Thing is I love this name, it was a name from my heart really. But having someone else reference their kid as that name over and over it just feels so weird naming my own that name. I love names that are somewhat unique (but not weird, I'm not that tragedeigh mom!) and probably couldn't name a baby something really common. It's like I want them to have their "own" name that no one else has, at least not someone we know.

Did this happen to anyone else? I wonder if it's possible to overcome this feeling or if the name is "ruined" forever for me? It feels like it's ruined but I don't want it to be.

wtf? In a single school year you can have like 3-4 Amelia’s, 3 Robert’s, etc. it’s not the end of the world.

Take if as a compliment. The girl was inspired by your choice

My toxic sister did this to me . We were pregnant just a few weeks apart and messaged a lot about names - we were both having girls I told her I’d chosen a name (first AND middle) she told me her choices (not the same as mine). She had her baby and ‘stole’ my name. I was furious.

Had my baby - called her the name I’d planned . Got birth announcement cards made using the screenshot of our messages so that everyone knew I wasn’t copying her despite my baby being born after hers!

I think you are over reacting.
You can still use your favourite name.
It's good that other people also use a name. It's good that a child hears of their name used by other people.

Did your sister give any reaction?

So you weren’t even pregnant when you were discussing names? You have no claim over a name whatsoever.

Call your baby what you want and don't stress if anyone else calls their baby the same. It is really not very important in the grand scheme of things although you might question whether they are someone you want to spend time with.

You sound like the crazy who got upset at me when at a toddler group I called my daughter over. An uncommon but classic name, she was upset that her daughter now ‘shared’ the name.

It also didn’t sound as if you were pregnant when ‘naming’ your child. What if they are the ‘wrong’ sex.

We haven’t spoken since this was 2 years ago . Tbh it was the last straw after a few things but those were all low level pissing me off gaslighting me then saying I overreact so I got fed up sent the cards and went NC!

Bloody hell. Get over it.

The name is not ruined. Other people share it. That's normal.

You will cringe at this post one day.

You are being utterly ridiculous, this is a co worker that you no longer work with .

You are so nice everyone, thanks for support!

Seriously?

Most names have lots and lots of people with the same name.

I taught for twenty years and most classes had at least two people with the same name - Mark, Lucas, Tom, Lucy, etc.

I have a name that is almost unique in the U.K. but incredibly common in Hungary.

You can't "steal" a name.

So your baby was years from conception when she named hers. Yes you're being way OTT.

My DD has a name that has never appeared on the list here in NI, which means there's never been three born in a single year. She's 4 now and that's still the case. We've still met two little girls who share it, one of whom is local and so may be in her class.

It's a good job you're not a member of my family. Most of the men share about four names, and the women are the same. We all go by both names in conversation to avoid mix,ups.

I NEVER tell people my names.
except I did once.
They were very good friends of ours and they used “our” name.

the circs were incredibly annoying.
they only used it because it sounded similar to the name they actually wanted (which their family assumed was a joke name when they shared it) So they needed a diff name.

my DSs name also has 2-3 other boys names that sound really similar but 1-2 letters different … they could have used those.

their son was also born slightly before ours so people kept asking if we copied them 🤯🤯🤯

we obviously carried on and used the name regardless and it’s fine. coincidentally? We don’t see them as much these days.
the DH at least had the decency to look embarrassed

with a coworker honestly who cares… in 5 years you won’t know them

Sadly the two people I know whose baby names were stolen by previous acquaintances they no longer see died of broken hearts at 18 months post theft in the first case and 5 years 3 months later in the second. They are at peace with the angles now.

Wow, that's insane, using screenshots, Jesus.

@LightDrizzle wins the thread

How very silly.

😂

You've no way of knowing if there was a family connection to the name for her. Or if she also just liked it.

Yabvvvu...

So someone you don’t work with any more has a child with a name you intended to use should you have a kid. Okay.

Thoughts and prayers.