Anyone ever recovered from a "stolen" baby name?

[bee2121]

I did the biggest mistake of my life by giving a true answer when a co-worker asked what baby names I like. I was caught off gard and I am a terrible liar. She is not going to have children so I was like whatever, better just say it as it is. Unfortunately another co-worker where closer than I though, she walked in just seconds later, my guess is that she overheard us because a few months later she announces she is pregnant and guess what name her baby got? My name!

If it where to be a common name I wouldn't have batted an eyebrow, but knowing she overheard us and the fact that it's a very uncommon name (but still old/classic, not a weird name) makes me believe she "stole" it.

I know the fault is mine for sharing in the first place, but it was hard not to feel a jab in the heart when I heard the name for the first time. She spelled it slightly different but it is pronounced exactly the same. I didn't confront her but man did it sting in my baby-longing heart.

I no longer work there, but I did for about a year after her baby arrived.

Thing is I love this name, it was a name from my heart really. But having someone else reference their kid as that name over and over it just feels so weird naming my own that name. I love names that are somewhat unique (but not weird, I'm not that tragedeigh mom!) and probably couldn't name a baby something really common. It's like I want them to have their "own" name that no one else has, at least not someone we know.

Did this happen to anyone else? I wonder if it's possible to overcome this feeling or if the name is "ruined" forever for me? It feels like it's ruined but I don't want it to be.

All I pray for in life is that one day, I will open my mail, and there will be a birth announcement card - not with pictures of the baby in question, but with screenshots of a text conversation between the mother and someone that I may or may not have met through her.

I’ll die happy then.

my guess is that she overheard us because a few months later she announces she is pregnant and guess what name her baby got? My name!
Our builder called his son after my DH ( unusual spelling and all) because he heard it and liked it. My DH tore down our new Conservatory in the end and had it rebuilt by someone too old to have children. So traumatised was he about the name stealing. He cried every teatime.

Dying from this comment 🤣🤣🤣

I am dying to know the name now!

I would also find that annoying but I'd not have gone to the lengths you did. 🙈 They probably thought you were having a moment of madness rather than thinking "Kudos to her" but I suppose you saved time on not having to show your friends and family the screenshot so spared them that story perhaps.

No. No one has ever recovered from a devastation of this magnitude.

Never mention your babies future name to anyone till you actually have a baby . People like names so use them.

In our office of 10 people we had two babies named William. Both born in the same year. One girl left. Man joined. They had a baby and named him William 🤣. Must be something in the water.

Personally I wouldn't be upset if it was stolen by a randomer but would if it was a friend or family member.

My sister did something similar with a name. She was getting married and said she would take his surname. I wasn't getting married but said I'd double barrel mine if I was because we are the last line of our surname in the family and it will then die out. Lo and behold she double barrelled her name and acted like the conversation never happened. I'll never get married so I don't suppose it matters but it did piss me off.

You can't steal a name op. Where did you hear the name first? Or is it so unique that you were going to be the first person to use it. Also its not like the pp whose pregnant sister pipped her to the post, 2 cousins born within months of each other having to same name would be a but weird, this is a woman you no longer even work with!

I didn't notice this but now I have I hope that you don't mind that I steal it from you, having stolen it from the OP.

It shows your colleague had no imagination.

My eldest dc has the same name as my bosses first born. This was pre-internet days and I never considered I was stealing her name. The babies were less than a year between them. They have never met.

My eldest has the same name as my bosses dog. The dog came along while I was pregnant but we had already decided on the name. It was made worse by the fact that the dog was in the office every day so everyone was well aware of the name.
I was a teeny bit gutted tbh as I didn't want anyone to think I'd named my baby after the dog but I still used the name.

Is this for real?

So you aren’t even sure this woman over heard you. You assume she did. You don’t even work with her anymore. And upset someone used a name you like, years ago?

and you are asking if it’s possible to ‘recover from it’. Recover from what?

This can’t be real?

Are you even pregnant? Planning on kids or more kids?

I'm sure that someone, somewhere has managed to survive the horrible, terrible tragedy of someone else using their baby name. Surely somewhere on this planet there is at least one person who has had the supreme resiliency and supernatural emotional strength to survive such a tragedy and even thrive after the absolute devastation of another child sharing their child's name. Take courage, OP. You'll get through this somehow.

Well some people have a very little going on in their lives so this may seem like end of the world to them.

@RRitzyMcFee Well I suppose I am in no position to object (anyway I am busy working out how to 'bat' my eyebrows 😁)

As a standalone incident yes I would have been petty but coming from a toxic family and so many other incidents it was exactly what I needed to do before going NC

😂😂😂😂😂😆😆😆😆😆😭😭😭😭

There is so much batshittery in this post I don't even know where to start.

"Biggest mistake of my life" "stolen"...

A colleague who you no longer work with picked a name that you want for your child that doesn't even exist yet.

Are you this dramatic in all aspects of your life?

No one "owns" a name.

Don't be ridiculous.
You weren't even pregnant when you discussed it, and you don't work with this woman anymore.

Wider friends and distant family just got a normal text . I didn’t want to waste too much money on bespoke cards apart from my sister / mother / brother / closer involved toxic members etc ! It may sound mad but if you have any experience of a narcissistic family you’ll understand how outing a narcissist then going NC is sometimes necessary

Support for what?

Will the horror never end?!
RIP 🙏