Changing an infant's name when she's nearly 2

[Backtothe90splease]

When DD was born we couldn't decide on her name for weeks. We narrowed it down to two and went back and forth and eventually gave her one of the names with the other as a middle name. They quite similar, and start with the same letter.

I've had momentary wobbles since but always stuck with the choice. Last night I woke up in the night and just had a dawning realisation that I preferred the other name and I'd never have a chance to name a child again and I'd fucked it up.

She's 2 in September. Is it too late? I haven't broached it with DH or anyone else but can imagine the people who bought us lovely personalised gifts won't be too happy...

It doesn't help that people don't pronounce the name we chose as we'd expected. That's probably the case for a lot of names to be honest, people get my wrong all the time.

Gah. Is this a blip? Anyone changed a name this late?

It is her name now. Making such a thing about this and calling it the worst regret in your life is ridiculous. Your daughter is a person in her own right now. You need to move on.

AIBU?

We're on a group holiday where we all have a caravan per family but do things as a group.
But my son and I are finding the group dynamics a bit overwhelming, particularly as my son is quiet and sensitive to noise, and the others all have siblings and no problems shouting over each other.

There is a lot of fighting between them, "he took this / she took that / he pushed me" etc...which I think is probably typical amongst siblings and whilst I wish the parents would do something to mitigate it (like preparing meals before hangry hits) I think a lot is just kids being kids.

So we've said we're going to spend time by ourselves tomorrow to have some 1-2-1 connection time.

It's got my anxiety riding high on a couple of fronts:

1. My son is due to start school soon. There are 6 kids on this holiday. There will be 30 in a class at school. If he finds this overwhelming how will he cope at school?! (He does go to preschool but it's smaller with 8-12 children)

1. We're thinking of adding to our family. But am worried that he'll find that overwhelming too.

AIBU? Is this how most only children would act in a group? Or does the group seem unusually rowdy?

Agree. I know four separate families who have adopted and none of their children have had their first names changed. Some added a middle name, and obviously the surname is changed to the adoptive family's name, but the first name is never changed. (First names were often changed decades ago - as is often seen on programs like Long Lost Family - but not allowed now as far as I'm aware)

My feeling is once a child has a name, it is THEIR name and a two year old will know their name.

I think just go for it! It’s not a huge deal in the grand scheme of life and she’ll get used to it!

It's much too late.
And in any case if you're prone to indecision, you might want to change it back after another two years.

I think it's appalling if it's true that people change the names of adopted children. Simply appalling.

Just start using her middle name as her first name? Maybe try using both at once for a while and then phase out the first name? Alot of my family (aunties and uncles on one side) go by their middle names, and growing up, I assumed we referred to them as their actual name, it was only as an adult I found out they all use their middle names as first names. My youngest is called Matilda Bonnie, but she gets called "Bonbon" now quite alot (especially by me and her grandparents) and responds to it. She's often been called nicknames such as Tilly Bon, Tilda Bonbon, Bonnie boodle, so can see how it would be quite easy to start using her middle name more than her first.

Don’t change anything officially, plenty of people are known by their second name.

Just stwrt calling her by her second name if you and DH want.

But do stop calling her chubster that’s a really nasty nickname.