Husband's awful name suggestions!

[annaj83]

My husband's absolutely set on several absolutely awful names! I'm trying to convince him otherwise, but MIL and even some of my family are on his side. Don't know gender.
Please tell me I'm not going crazy, these names are awful
Indy
Jolene
Cosmo
Estella
Trisha
Kiana
Aliesha
Chastity

I honestly fear a child named any of those would be absolutely bullied. Any advice?

The only one I would consider- and I do really like!- is Estelle. Not Estella!

The others are dreadful - is he joking with you?

Another vote for Cosima here. The more family members you involve in choosing the name the more confusion there will be. Try to park it for now and quietly figure it out with your DH.

The way I did it, I gave DH a list my shortlist of about 8 boy names and 8 girl names, he had some hard no’s and some strong yes’s and it was literally one conversation (first born was a boy so his girl name had he been a girl just rolled onto baby no 2 who was a girl). Both children’s second name is from his family’s side (living relatives he is fond of). If I had asked my mother or MIL their opinion or input it would have dragged on and on.

Surely he's not serious about Chastity? If my DH put that one forward I'd be laughing in his face.

I prefer his names to yours, to be honest. Some are terrible but I like Cosmo, Estella and Indy. Of your list I only really like Jack.

Nell, Jane, May, Diana for a girl and Jack, Charlie, Will for a boy

These are nice names. May is really nice as a first name imo.

You could use Ellen, Eleanor or Penelope for Nell.

Would you consider Willow for a girl if you like Will?

You will need to put your foot down and tell them all you are choosing the name and it's not a committee vote. If the baby gets his surname you give the first name.

And MIL definitely doesn't get a say - you can tell DH that this is absolutely not going to happen.

My advice would be to stop discussing the name - tell them nothing from now on, and don't engage in any more conversations.

Thank you for your input. I've seen a lot of suggestions of Cosima which I actually quite like. Will bring it up with him.
He is actually being serious with Chastity. It's an old name in his family but I agree it's vile.
Even though I'm carrying the baby I did think he deserves input, but after his suggestions (there were more, I only posted the worst) I'm not so sure anymore.
Baby's due late Feb, still not sure what to do.

Strange mixture of posh sounding names and made up, very not posh sounding names with Jolene and Chastity added for an American touch. Strange list.

@annaj83

My husband's absolutely set on several absolutely awful names! I'm trying to convince him otherwise, but MIL and even some of my family are on his side. Don't know gender. Please tell me I'm not going crazy, these names are awful Indy Jolene Cosmo Estella Trisha Kiana Aliesha Chastity

I honestly fear a child named any of those would be absolutely bullied. Any advice?

You both have to like any name chosen. At worst, one of you may have to compromise but you have to choose something you don't hate.

Do not involve any other family member in your choices, it's purely up to you and the baby's father.

He doesn’t seem to have any particular taste, even a unified bad taste.

Your Nell is much the nicest of either list. Estella isn’t bad.

I know of a little Jolene who must be 6 or 7. I quite like it.

I really dislike Jack and Charlie. They're just awful (imo - I know there are about a billion of them around so other people must like them). I also think Diana is a slightly bonkers choice. Neither of your name lists are to my taste, but I really don't think his are any worse than yours tbh.

In laws do not need to be involved in naming your baby though. That's just overcomplicating the while process. You name the baby. They all say "how nice". The end

Jolene is a pretty sound but it's overwhelmingly linked to That Song and you'd end up doing a 10 year stretch in the clink for bludgeoning the 1000th person who thought it would be hilarious to sing it at you.

Nope, I don't like any of those either. Come up with some of your own favourite names and don't agree upon a name you really don't like.

Cosima would be the girl version. Indy and Estella ok. Trisha and Chastity unbelievably bad. The others a bit...not allowed to say chav so I'll say 'ordinaire' which is Dutch for chav.

I think some people think of namin a child as a completely blank slate.
They don’t think about current popularity, the historical popularly, or any contextual connotations. Or even the meaning of the name.
I think that such people are more likely to be men than women.

Chastity. Really.

However, not all those names are in the same league.

I like Indie, Estella and Cosmo but not the rest. Your MIL has nothing to do with naming your baby, she’s had her turn. You can’t settle for a name you hate so partner is going to have to compromise.

I’d advise against discussing names with others and just keep it between you and your partner.

I agree about those names being awful, best of luck finding a name you both like.

I love Jolene because of the song. And while you may feel it is somewhat dated, it's also a particular unique name in my opinion. Can be shortened to Jo, Jolie (as in Angelina Jolie which is pretty cool) and maybe Lene (pron. same way as "lean") or even "lean-ee" as a nickname.

Otherwise, I love Cosmo and Kiara.

**Kiana

Estella is nice.

Cosima is lovely, too (not Cosmo for a girl!).

Agree the rest are awful (although Jolene is a fabulously brave if wacky suggestion!).

Good lord. My other half suggested Scott and I was appalled. These are next level surprising...

Good luck OP!

Yet again another mumsnet thread about baby names where prospective parents attempt to come up with names that no-one else is using. At best the child will be spelling out their name for life. At worst they will be called "Chastity" - omg! How completely inappropriate.

Poor baby.

Indy - not bad
Jolene - Dolly Parton
Cosmo - women’s magazine
Estella - nasty girl in Great Expectations
Trisha - US talk show host
Kiana - bit chavvy nowadays
Aliesha - not sure about the spelling
Chastity - creepy

@OakPine

Yet again another mumsnet thread about baby names where prospective parents attempt to come up with names that no-one else is using. At best the child will be spelling out their name for life. At worst they will be called "Chastity" - omg! How completely inappropriate.

Poor baby.

Maybe everyone should just call their offspring Sophie and Jack?

@annaj83

Thank you for your input. I've seen a lot of suggestions of Cosima which I actually quite like. Will bring it up with him. He is actually being serious with Chastity. It's an old name in his family but I agree it's vile. Even though I'm carrying the baby I did think he deserves input, but after his suggestions (there were more, I only posted the worst) I'm not so sure anymore. Baby's due late Feb, still not sure what to do.

I would start by telling him you will leave rather than let him call your baby Chastity.

You may feel this is an overreaction but I'm being serious - it may have been popular in the past, but nowadays it's a completely inappropriate name for a girl that reeks of dated patriarchal ideas about women's virtue. It is also likely to invite sleazy innuendo and bad jokes when she's older.

Estella is a beautiful name, Indy's nice too, don't like any of the others.

I do love Jane though, always have, DD2 was going to have Jane as part of her name but XH didn't like it.