At what point is it actually cruel to give your child an old woman/ man name

[Amandalockwood1007]

A lot of names are coming back from the 20s/30s and some of them are okay for 2022 like Alice, Elsie. But certain names sound so terrible to saddle a child with in this generation for example Edith, mary, iris, Maude etc. I just can’t help but feel awful for the children who will probably be bullied for having “old people names” when does it become mean to give a child a name with an time stamp on it from the 1800s🙄

Edith, Iris and Maude are lovely names.

It's so subjective. I wouldn't want to "saddle" my dd with a name like Sophie that's ubiquitous and insipid (to my ear anyway) or an American name like Taylor. Luckily we're all different.

But its all down to personal taste... for example I love the name Alice but think Elsie is awful, which you deem ok.

I also think Iris is really nice which you deem to be awful.

I'm actually not a fan of the old lady / old man name trend in general but its been around for what 10 years or so as a trend so is hardly surprising? I doubt kids will get bullied when half the kids these days have names that were popular 100+ years ago.

You’re being ridiculous OP

Yes but it’s not offensive for someone to say to a child “your names American” they would probably like it. if someone was to say “your name sounds like an old woman” that would make them feel weird and left out think its mean @Itsnotdeep

It is totally a question of different peoples taste .
Personally these names aren't so bad at least they are actually names whatever era they are from .
I can't stand made up silly names with ludicrous spellings where the child is literally going to be asked how to pronounce and spell their name for the rest of their lives .
Also just to add anyone planning to name their child with a ridiculous spelling please it's not cool it's cruel ffs .

Personally I love the name Mary, classic and timeless.

Whereas ‘current’ names like Harper or Kai sounds horrendous to me.

Fortunately we’re all different.

Most young children probably wouldn't know they were old woman/man names unless an adult told them

But they’re not old people names. To their generation they are young people names. 😂 don’t you see?

It's definitely down to personal taste and maybe also social class in some cases, for example Boris and Carrie naming their son Wilfred. Its definitely not a name I would choose and definitely not one I've come across in real life in the mostly working class children I meet, but I imagine it fits right in with the circles his parents socialise in.

If kids want to be mean to each other they’ll find a way regardless of someone’s name. I went to school with a boy called Lee - innocuous, regular name, you’d have thought. Someone decided he looked like a chimp and from then on he became Chimpanzlee for the rest of his school days. I personally think Edith, Iris and Maude are lovely names. American-style names like McKenzie or Kayden or whatever scream chav to me. But some people like them. I personally think they’re tacky and worse than ‘old’ names

"Old lady names" for todays children would be things like Margaret Pamela and Barbara

The names you are referring to OP are older than that so are historic /vintage/classic.

Whether you like the names is a matter of taste but I can't see why the names you suggest would cause comment let alone bullying

@BiscuitLover3678

But they’re not old people names. To their generation they are young people names. 😂 don’t you see?

Exactly. "Old lady names" for kids now are probably quite different - I'm guessing Barbara, Carol, Linda etc.

I rather like Edith and Iris. Less keen on Maude!

Yeah the only people having this sort of reaction are adults, who presumably can keep their opinions to themselves. Besides, in lots of communities, elders are respected and having a name that recalled an elder would be an honour. I really like all the "old lady" names you have listed, OP.

I would love susan and keith and kevin and sharon to make a come back.

@LublinToDublin

"Old lady names" for todays children would be things like Margaret Pamela and Barbara

The names you are referring to OP are older than that so are historic /vintage/classic.

Whether you like the names is a matter of taste but I can't see why the names you suggest would cause comment let alone bullying

X post! We both picked Barbara but I agree re Pamela and Margaret too!

Unless you think they're going to be bullied by people currently in their 40s or older it won't be an issue as these aren't 'old lady' names to younger people.

Or do you routinely bully people because of their name?

I know 3 Ediths, an Iris, 2 Marys' and a Maud. These names are so popular near where I live that honestly I wouldn't even think of them as odd

Thinking about it the current generation of babies will have grandparents in their 50s now - so old lady names will be Sarah and Debbie!

I’m pretty sure you’re being deliberately goady.

We used one of the cruel names you mentioned, DD will just have to bear it as best she can I guess 🤷‍♀️

Maud - without the ‘e’ - is one of my favourite English girl’s names. Wonderfully poetic. And Mary, Iris, Edith all bring to mind fabulously stylish, thoroughly 21st century women.

But it’s a big old world - can’t imagine how you’d cope with my totally un-English name, OP. I was certainly never bullied because of it.

Name use goes in cycle so any name will always be labelled as an 'old lady/old man' name when it first returns to use after a few decades of being unfashionable

Charlotte and Emily were thought terribly old fashioned when they first returned in the 70s/80s but are now viewed as young people names again

There are only a few which I would class as cruel such as Fanny

Haha, I disagree with you! I love Edith, and have a Mary 🤷🏻‍♀️

Much kinder than giving your child a name that is spelt in a way they are going to have to spell it out every time they give it for the rest of their life.

The “old” names you suggested are actually rather lovely.

It's so subjective and changes regularly. I had Maeve classed as a fimly 'old lady name' but saw a couple of TV series recently where the 'cool' teem character was called Maeve - it changed my view of the name. (Sex Education maybe? And something else.) Same for Edie.
I also have a name which is derided on here are old fashioned when it comes up (rarely) but it's not old fashined to me cos it's my name!