DH has vetoed my girls names because they’re “too middle class”

[MonicaFaloolaGeller]

I’m gutted!

We have a son called Edward, I’m currently pregnant with no. 2. Pretty much got a boy’s name locked in but still shortlisting girls.

Two girls names I said I loved are Ophelia and Arabella. Both go fine with our surname.

He said no to both on account of them being too posh/middle class. Nothing wrong with the names themselves, just the association (in his mind).

He has a thing about anything he thinks is too middle class (even though he is, by definition, middle class himself.)

Can anyone think of names in the same vein that I would like that won’t offend DH’s ridiculous class sensibilities?

Other names I like are

Alexandra
Evelyn (with a short “ev” like in never)

DH so far has said he likes Orla and Georgia. I’m not into Orla, and don’t like Georgia.

Middle names Mary, Rose.

I agree with him and you need to both be happy with a name. Edward is a solid British name that has been popular for centuries and is not posh or pretentious. Plenty of good suggestions on here though.

He likes sort a names or a names with more consonants. There must be a short a name that OP likes.

Anna, Sheila, Charlotte, Talia, Natalia, Chandra, Fiona, etc.

Could you use them as middle names instead?

Dh vetoed all my waiting-since-childhood-to-call-my-child-after-this-literary-character names. In my daydreams about naming babies I had never allowed for a father who would actually have an opinion.

The problem with being a reader is that you have a frame of reference that other people don’t share, but can be deaf to other aspects of the names. I instantly got the Naughtiest Girl and Hamlet references, but I’d completely miss the Ophelia/I feel ya play on words that will make life miserable on the playground.

I love the name Edward.

What about Clare, Miranda or Charlotte?

Alexandra is fabulous. Evelyn is over-popular atm, also a bit 'matchy' with Edward tbh.

I don't understand the current love for Ophelia. She was a horrifically tragic character in a horrifically tragic play. And (while I think your dh seems to have acquired a chip on his shoulder at some point in his life) Ophelia and Arabella in particular are, as a PP said, two rather self-consciously 'aspiring to the UMC' names.

Of other people's suggestions, I really like Harriet and Philippa - they go well with Edward and I think meet the kind of vibe you are after. Not Arrietty. The point of it is it's a 'borrowed' (and half-heard, half understood) name, and it just screams 'trying to be literary/quirky'.

Alexandra is lovely

Edward isn't posh, it's classless like all royal names, James, George, Charles / Charlie, Elizabeth, Catherine, Anne. Traditionally these would be used for babies from all walks of life. There have been loads of WC Eddies and Eds.
What about Anna?

Re the suggestion of Arabella...

If the OP ends up with an Edward and Bella, people will assume she's a Twilight fan.

Something like Penelope is similar in grandeur to Ophelia and Arabella, but it can get shortened to a more everyday Penny.

Names that give me a similar vibe to yours
Esme
Mallory
Isabella
Evangeline
Eloise
Emmeline
Amelie
Fleur
Sylvia
Florence
Olive
Opal
Abigail
Camilla
Alicia/Elyssia
Louisa

How about Cordelia for a Shakespeare heroine? Miranda, Imogen

Or Cecilia, Serena, Susannah, Cassia, Francesca, Claudia, Helena, Philippa

But if it means that much to you - try and push back. They do/did have quite a rarified feel, but you can point out that with Isabella already super popular and Ophelia getting popular that’s probably changed by now

Ophelia for me sounds a bit like ‘I feel ya’ so have to be careful with surname. Also her fate in Hamlet would put me off!

Edward is lovely.

Adaline or Adeline
Ada
Evangeline
Margot
Josephine/joey

One of my major literally crush names is Posy after Posy Fossil in Ballet Shoes but my OH would never allow it 🤣

Amelia?

I sympathise OP. When we found out our youngest was a girl I really really wanted to call her Arabella. My husband, like yours, thought it "too posh and a bit pretentious". My husband went to bloody public school FFS. He's very left wing though and a bit chippy about his posh background. I call it being a bit "prolier than thou", but I digress!

Luckily a few months before she was born his favourite band The Arctic Monkeys released a song called Arabella. He suddenly decided it had grown on him and that is indeed her name.

I agree with PPs who say the name has become much more declasse in recent years. It may because its used aspirationally but more likely people (like me) who like feminine "frilly" names just like the sound of it. I don't think anyone had said to me that her name sounds posh or middle class. I have had a few "sounds like a Disney Princess" comments but I'll take that.

Arabella Rose would be beautiful!

I'm not so keen on Ophelia - makes me think of "Oh, feel ya".

Your husband's choices sound a bit dull to me. Orla makes me think it looks like "Oral" - apologies to any Irish readers.

@mariemare

Re the suggestion of Arabella...

If the OP ends up with an Edward and Bella, people will assume she's a Twilight fan.

Something like Penelope is similar in grandeur to Ophelia and Arabella, but it can get shortened to a more everyday Penny.

No one is going to think that by the time the kids are teens, and I doubt they’d think it now given how popular Edward and Isabella are as names.

@Lizzie523

Agree with your husband totally. Edward ok but not keen overall

Yep / I agree with the husband too

What on earth is wrong with a 'middle class' name? I honestly don't understand this worry about supposed 'class'. Doesn't a person determine who they are rather than their name?

'Orla makes me think it looks like "Oral" - apologies to any Irish readers.'

I'm not Irish, but I believe Orla is the anglicised spelling anyway. And I have noticed it seems quite a British trait to make abstruse connections between names and sexual or scatological terms.

How about Cordelia for a Shakespeare heroine, or Imogen, Miranda

Serena, Cecilia, Philippa, Francesca, Cassia, Adela, Claudia, Estella/Stella, Helena, Leonora, Eloise, Marianne

But if it means that much to you - push back. With Isabella mega popular, and Ophelia rising I don’t think either name has the rarified rep it once did.

How about Mary as the first name as its really nice and classy

I have to say that I don’t like Ophelia or Arabella either. Both names have risen massively in popularity as part of a frilly, princessy name trend which I am thankful it seems is on the way out. Your husband seems to prefer more simple and unfussy names. Have you considered using a name app like Kinder? It’s like Tinder for baby names; you are presented with a wide selection of baby names and you are told if you match on any.

All of the names in your OP, including Edward, are extremely middle-class.

I don't see why that's such a bad thing?

suggest only former Queen's names?

It doesn't matter why, he gets to veto just like you do. If he really wanted to call your next DD Demi-Leigh, for instance, would he get to just because he really wants to? Naming children is a compromise.

Fwiw the name Arabella is my worst. It reminds me of arrogant and yes, very pony club. Ophelia is more quirky and a bit try hard.

If I were a single parent, my 3 sons would have been Barnaby, Tobias and Titus. I am not, so they aren't.

Edward is 'middle class' too. What's so bad about that?!