DH has vetoed my girls names because they’re “too middle class”

[MonicaFaloolaGeller]

I’m gutted!

We have a son called Edward, I’m currently pregnant with no. 2. Pretty much got a boy’s name locked in but still shortlisting girls.

Two girls names I said I loved are Ophelia and Arabella. Both go fine with our surname.

He said no to both on account of them being too posh/middle class. Nothing wrong with the names themselves, just the association (in his mind).

He has a thing about anything he thinks is too middle class (even though he is, by definition, middle class himself.)

Can anyone think of names in the same vein that I would like that won’t offend DH’s ridiculous class sensibilities?

Other names I like are

Alexandra
Evelyn (with a short “ev” like in never)

DH so far has said he likes Orla and Georgia. I’m not into Orla, and don’t like Georgia.

Middle names Mary, Rose.

Your DH sounds a berk. You choose and tell him what works for girls.
I always like 2 forenames so that they can favour one later in life in it is their preference. I always like names that are a bit different so there is a chance of them being the only one in the class with that first name, and that individualises them.

Camille?

My two girls are called Jocelyn and Lucille (both named after their Godmothers).
If you like Enid Blyton's boarding school books, how about Belinda?

They scream “I want to be middle class”

@Dannyandsandy

They scream “I want to be middle class”

They are middle class. 🤔

They scream “I want to be middle class”

You scream "I'm very judgemental"!

But honestly, I don't understand this obsession with 'middle, working, upper, whatever class'. Can't we just encourage parents to use names they love and not be so judgey!

Yeah I just don’t get this class obsession. Either you like the name or not.

In other English speaking countries, the same names will carry very different class connotations.

@JellyFishy13

Imagine going to a playground where 10 girls are playing and shouting Anna / Kate / Mary. At least three will be looking at you. And only - yours - one will not be dissapointed. Go with your preference. I love Ophelia!

Where do you live?

In 20 years of working with primary kids I have never had a Mary, or a Kate, and maybe 2 Annas.

They are all called Mia/ Maya/ Ava/ Myla/ Eva/ Ellie/ Ella round here.

In my 20 years of teaching primary in SE London I've taught a handful of girls named Mary or Anna. I don't think I've taught a Kate but I know a few teenaged ones.

Mary is quite rare nowadays - there were only 170 babies named Mary in 2019 - fewer than Vienna, Ivy-Rose and Harlow (!) for context. I can’t say I’ve met one younger than their 30s.
Anna is more popular (top 100). There were only 65 Kates in 2019 but also 217 with various spellings of Catherine and also 183 with various spellings of Caitlin so also potentially a bit more common as a nickname.
There were 282 babies called Ophelia and 775 called Arabella so both of those names are actually probably going to be more common for this generation than Mary and Kate, and Arabella more than Anna.

There are two Annas in DD's class, and DS's has an Anne, an Annie and an Anna.

Actually @JellyFishy13 I longed as a child to have a popular name and couldn't understand why my parents hadn't called me Susan or Angela.

It's precisely why both our children were given classic names with no alternate spellings. There was always another of ds's and dd's name in a year group. In reception, among 10 girls there were 3 of dd's name but when she moved to secondary, out of 90 she was the only one!

It all changes doesn't it. When I was at school the names were: Jane, Helen, Fiona, Susan, Deborah, Julia, Amanda for girls and for boys: John, Jeremy, Julian, Simon, Martin, Mark. All rarely heard now.

DS they were: Tom, Will, Sam, Ben, Ed, James, and dd: Mathilda, Eleanor, Cicely, Alice, Imogen, Jess, Molly - so lots of Tillys, Millys, Ellie, etc.
They are 26 and 23.

I don't think Arabella and Ophelia would be regarded as particularly posh or quirky. They may have been 20 or so years ago but I think have been overtaken by Isolde, Xanthe, Magnus, Gawain of that ilk tbh.

@MonicaFaloolaGeller

I’ve known an Eleanor, Elinor, Elanor and Elena and they all pronounced it exactly the same way. But I grew up in places without a rhotic accent which I guess makes a difference.

My teenage dd is called Eleanor, known mostly as Ellie (which she prefers) and in her English class alone there are 3 Ellies. I have been surprised at how popular it is (reasonably middle-class area)

Lucy
Luella
Penelope
Sienna
Serena

In my primary school at the moment there are several versions of Isabel/Isabella/Isobel and Tilly/Millie//Amelia/Emilia/ Sophie/Sophia/Olivia x4/Arlox3/Theo x4.

I was told my children had pretentious names so perhaps we have similar tastes.. They are Isabella, Susannah and Philippa!
Susannah is Susannah Mary and Philippa would have been Philippa Rose if my cousin hadn't pinched Rose for her daughter the week before. Actually she has Erica Rose if that appeals.

I know siblings
Edward and Verity
Edward and Annabel
Edward and Esther
Edward and Evelyn

Other ideas
Josephine Mary (very Chalet School!)
Margaret Rose
Miranda
Imogen
Rosalind
Juliet or Julia

Love Annabel not Annabelle . Silly really but it seems so different to me.

@Benjispruce3

Love Annabel not Annabelle . Silly really but it seems so different to me.

I totally get it; my favourite girls name is Isabel ( I have one ) but it drives me mad when people spell it Isabelle; too frilly!!

Louisa
Esme
Clara
Cordelia

Yes too frilly @ladygindiva

Everly/ Everleigh
Adeline
Felicity

@mariemare

Re the suggestion of Arabella...

If the OP ends up with an Edward and Bella, people will assume she's a Twilight fan.

Something like Penelope is similar in grandeur to Ophelia and Arabella, but it can get shortened to a more everyday Penny.

No one would think of Twilight

Marianne