Traditional boys name, for a girl

[Sixofseven]

Just wondering how mean it would be to give a girl a name which is traditionally for boy, like Matthew or Michael. Does anyone here (an adult woman) have a boys name and what was it like as a name? Did it embarrass you growing up?
I’d like to name my daughter after a male family member but it’s not a unisex name and I don’t want to make her struggle as my other daughter has a very feminine name.
TIA

Mum in the Walton’s was played by a Michael.

Michael Learned played Mrs Walton in 'The Waltons' back in the 70s. I was always intrigued that she had a traditionally male name.

@PandaFluff

I can imagine a boy being called Florence. It's a bit like Lawrence.

And Florent is a man's name. I know a Florent nn Flo

I now have “A Girl Called Johnny” in my head now.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=PUSDeqYYB2Q

Mallory?

What would little Malcolm's middle name be? Because I would put money on that being the name she requests being known as when she starts secondary school, if not before.

She will be asked regularly if her parents wanted a boy. Whenever she introduces herself (on the slim chance she keeps the name and isn't introducing herself as her middle name), she will be braced for the "did your parents want a boy?" question. She will think at some level, you probably did, given her sister got the pretty girl name and she got the boy name.

My daughter's middle name is James in memory of a very dear family member. She has a very feminine, two syllable first name, it flows really nicely and we've had some really positive comments about her name. Some people got really mad about it though (looking at you PIL....).

Having said that, I wouldn't name a girl Malcolm, even as a middle name. Its just so clunky, I can't think of a single first name to make it sound good, sorry. I love Malley!

I loved the young ones (I still giggle when I think of the UNiversity Challenge episode) but I did get teased mercilessly for a few years because of my name.

And this was not because Vyvyan was a punk that did ridiculous and disgusting things, but because he was a man, and therefore I had a boy's name.

I had a friend called a very feminine name that was a sort of homophone of a male name (so not as close as Frances/Francis or Lesley/Leslie). There was an actor that was famous when we were teenagers with the same surname as her with this male sort of homophone first name She was continually teased about having a 'man's name' even though no man has ever been given her actual name. Teenagers are little shits really.

OP either give your DD the middle name Malcolm or give her a feminine form (since it's a Scottish name Malina or Malcolmina) as a first name. But be aware that Malina sounds nothing at all a bit like Melæna so no doubt someone at some point will pass comment on her name sounding like shit.

@DanielODonkey

Malcolm isn't really one of those unisex names. It really really isn't.

Use it as a middle name. Or maybe don't. But... just. No. Don't do it.

If you have another daughter with a very traditional female name then can you imagine trying to explain why you went waaaay over on the other side of the pendulum swing with Malcolm?

It's one of those names like Brian or Dudley or Dennis that really isn't unisex.

Much like Pandora or Lily or Pamela isn't.

Bizarrely one string of my family tree has a tradition of boys having the middle name Lilly! We have no idea why - we kept expecting to find it as a maternal surname but no luck. It persisted for about 150 years.

But Malcolm, no. Mallory maybe?

It's interesting that people are mentioning the actor who played the Mum in the Waltons had a male name. However she was always listed on the credits in films / TV shows as "Miss Michael Learned"

Not sure if this will work for you or your location but in Gaelic speaking parts of Scotland the name Calum is a derivative of Malcolm and are often used interchangeably. Might give you more options like Callie etc while still honoring the name?

@

@Sixofseven I really like it mixing up names!! I am expecting a girl and I love boys names for girls! I love James and Noah but DH won't :(

Apologies, haven't read the whole thread but Malcolm sounds very masculine to me - so I think it would be a bit cruel to use it for a DD, (especially if her sister has a more commonplace "feminine" name - it's just asking for trouble/jealousy).

Mallie/Malley as a first name is okay, if quite unusual (could be short for more popular/well known Malia? ("Mal -ee -ah" like Obama's daughter)). Or you could use Malcolmia - a rare name, but it is quite a pretty flowering plant.

You could go Mali which is a traditional Welsh name and maybe looks better that Malley but same exact prounciation

Had a close girl friend named Marshall.
She had problems with it. Her name was always put on the list of boys instead of girls.
When she ordered her class ring they sent it in Men's size instead of Women's. She marked "female" but apparently they didn't look or thought she made a mistake.
She even got a letter from the government about her "failure to register for selective service".

'Course you can Malcolm!' (For those of a certain age) but I wouldn't

Sorry but I think it's a shit thing to do to a child. And Malcolm? Fucking cruel.

Malley is ridiculous, made up stupidity.

The feminine of Malcolm is Malina - it’s not often used but is part of a Scottish tradition of feminising names by adding ina (David/Davina is still used James/Jamesina used to be).

Malcolm is a very male name, and the idea of using it as is very disrespectful to your daughter - she will be a person in her own right and a woman who deserves an appropriate name. It’s not on for your husband to take a notion to name her after a male relative, with no regard of the consequences to her. I imagine the relative would be/would have been horrified - I cannot imagine any man called Malcolm wanting a granddaughter named after him.

There is a perfectly fine feminine form so use that.

Yes, the Scottish tradition of adding "ina" to a man's name is well kent in my family. It usually signified "we really wanted a son but kept having bloody daughters".

Found out at my neighbour's funeral she was called Torquilina.

A relative was Andrewina.

I know of Thomasina and a Jamesina too.

But OP there really is a difference between buying clothes from any shop and toys not restricted by gender and naming your female child a very very very specifically masculine name.

I have two children who have both played with cars, dolls, superheroes and Lego. Both wear captain America or snow white dressing up clothes. Doesn't matter. Let kids be kids, let toys be toys and let clothes be clothes.

But for the love of the wee man, don't name a girl Malcolm. You might think you are being gender stereotype busting and brave but it's cruel.

You could always try it out for yourself. Be a Malcolm for a few months. At least then your choice to be brave and so on is only impacting on you and not your baby.

Get your DH to call himself Margaret or Aaliyah or Elizabeth.

Given your posts, I'm surprised that your eldest daughter has a 'very feminine' name.

I could understand your decision if your older DD had a male name but she doesnt but you then decide to name her sister Malcolm after a family member, I find a little bit odd. Are you disappointed its not a boy? Malcolm is a dreadful and i am not sure what you expect to achieve...I find it hard to believe that your DD father would be happy with your choice....actually the more i think about it this surely must be a wind up

No

Don’t do it. I have a boys middle name (mums maiden name).. I absolutely hate it. Leave it out at all opportunities.

How about Charlotte, Charlie for short
Georgina, Georgie for short
Matilda, Mattie for short
Harriet, Harri for short