Snobbery to popular names

[Tblock]

Anyone get the feeling of a lot of snobbery when it comes to popular names ? I have seen it on here a lot. “Oh I don’t like Alifie, it’s far to popular and over done “ “ Ava way to popular and over used “ etc etc. Seen it a lot of times when people have wanted an opinion and specifically mention a popular name. I don’t feel anyone should feel like they can’t name a child a name they love, just because it’s a popular name and is a “trend” as such. I know it’s all opinions, but I get the impression people don’t like certain names, purely because they are popular and it’s the in thing to do in bashing popularity. If you want to name you’re child a name that will probably have another 6 of the same in his/her school then so be it. Nobody had an issue when we were in school and everyone was called jack , Sarah, Daniel, Rachel etc, why such snobbery these days ? Just something I have picked up a lot

I was thinking this the other day and talking to DH about it. Someone had posted about Rosie, which we were going to call our DS if they were girls. They didn't want to use it if it was a 'popular' name. Which I thought was quite sad.

So many people seem to be focused on giving their DC a unique name. As if that will make them unique and stand out as a person. We gave DS1 a bit of a different name, because it was a variation of DH's name (which is also something MN looks down on). But DS2 has what I would call a well used name. Although there are no other kids in his school with the name!

My sisters have unusual names. They've spent their entire lives having to correct people on pronunciation and spelling. For one, their name later did become popular when she was in her 20s. So it just goes to show 'unique' is only at that moment in time.

The reason the names are popular is because they are nice and lots of people like them.
Statistically, whatever name to chose, they are likely to be the only one in their class/dance lesson/football team/chess club/extreme ironing club etc. Like statistically, they will be the only one with their birthday in the group, or house number. But anomalies are common, so 2 or more children could share in a small group.
My DD, top 5 name... Only one I her school. But at the same time, they were 5 boys in the preschool/reception with the same name, not in the top 50. All moved there after birth, so not a name trend in the area.
My younger DD, unusual name... Shared with two members of staff.

It's unpredictable. So just go for names to like.

@Mogwaimug

I was thinking this the other day and talking to DH about it. Someone had posted about Rosie, which we were going to call our DS if they were girls. They didn't want to use it if it was a 'popular' name. Which I thought was quite sad.

So many people seem to be focused on giving their DC a unique name. As if that will make them unique and stand out as a person. We gave DS1 a bit of a different name, because it was a variation of DH's name (which is also something MN looks down on). But DS2 has what I would call a well used name. Although there are no other kids in his school with the name!

My sisters have unusual names. They've spent their entire lives having to correct people on pronunciation and spelling. For one, their name later did become popular when she was in her 20s. So it just goes to show 'unique' is only at that moment in time.

Couldn’t agree more. Everyone seems to be obsessed with uniqueness. I’m going to call my child the most obscure name possible, just so nobody else will choose it. If you genuinely don’t like a particular name then fine, but I don’t think names should be bashed just because they are popular.

Agree that a lot of people seem to think that giving their child a name which is unique demonstrates how unique they are as an individual. The rest of us know that every child in unique, whether they're called Jack, Cedric or Amazing'Leigh.

On the other hand, in my year at senior school we had at least 6 Karens, a Carron, Caron and Karyn. In my DD's year, you can't move for kids called Katie or Hannah. So I understand a parent not wanting their child to go through school being Ava B or Katie P.

But there's a whole massive range of names between Olivia and Jack and Sanathareightlee-Jane or Persiancarpet.

In short - unusual is good. Weird, wacky and badly spelled is not good.

I don’t like really popular names, I’ve never met someone with my name, and like it like that. You feel differently and that is fine! I don’t feel snobby about it, as in I don’t judge other people for using them, but if you asked me what I think of Ava, I’d say it’s boring to me because I’ve met so many of them. If I truly loved Ava then I wouldn’t let popularity get in the way, but I think in various ways, not just names, popularity devalues things for me, always has even as a child.

I agree op, it's also impossible to know what's going to be popular in your area, in your child's specific age group. My dd has a name that isn't particularly out there, but it's not in the top 150 girls names. There are 2 at her small nursery! Conversely, there are no children there called Olivia or whatever the most popular name was 2 years ago. Name your kids something you like!

I just find the whole over the top uniqueness a bit annoying and forced. Just my opinion. People will call their child Storm Ranger because nobody has it and it’s so unique. I know Storm Ranger isn’t a name ( well it could be ) ;), but you get my drift. My point is, if you don’t like certain popular names then that’s cool, but don’t name bash purely because it’s popular.

There's also a lot of snobbery on here about 'proper' names. Things like "Jack isn't a real name, its a nickname for John" or "Harry is the diminutive of Henry." I've also seen Jamie, Edie and Abi listed as "not real names". I know people with all of the above names on their BCs, some of them are in their 40s so whilst they might traditionally have been the shortened/familiar form of other names, their use as standalone names is hardly new.

I personally love Alfie. Going to call our boy that when he’s due April. Is it over used ? Is it to popular ? Yeh probably, but don’t really care because we both love that name and feel Alfie is a nice name. I’m sure when he’s in school, there will be 5 other Alifies, but you know what, so be it. There were 50 Daniels, 20 Rachel’s and 30 Emma’s when I was at school. Nobody battered an eyelid then. I got no issue with opinions and people not liking certain names, but snobbery I do have an issue with and seems a lot of that is apparent when it comes to trendy names

I remember a lot of Johns and Mikes going by their last names to avoid confusion and a lot of frustrated Jessicas and Jennifers - but then there were also those with odd names that had nicknames too. Different people react to names differently.

I think for some it's not wanting issues if loads of people have the same name, particularly if you had it growing up, much as if you have a fairly unusual for an area name you might go for something more popular. I was doing some family tree search and had a laugh that Mary has a child called Rial and Rial has a child named Lottie.

I also think for some it is snobbery of wanting to be seen as unique parents not following the crowd. I remember with my oldest, the closest baby clinic was in a fairly notoriously snobby area and a lady got properly cross with me because our sons shared a name, and she went on at me about how she'd wanted him to be different. The name was in the top 30 or so that year as it had been for several years leading up to it so I'm not entirely sure how she'd thought that (and, though I didn't know until after we named him, it was associated with a footballer which I guess she'd probably heard as often as I did, but was more fed up with it. Now no one makes that remark so it wasn't that associated, but at the time it happened a lot).

I also have a child with a 'top 3000' name, which I didn't know until after she'd asked up to look it up (her older sister had an assignment that included looking up how popular her name is). It hasn't really made a different for how often we run into others (that mother in the baby clinic is the only other with that popular name we've met) or others comments on their names, but she definitely gets more excited for things with her name on it. I think there is definitely a balance between wanting something not in the top 20 and wanting something entirely unique (or uniquely spelled).

I get the desire to not have your child be one of several in their class, however, it is less likely these days and as PP have said, it’s not possible to control.

I personally didn’t want to call my kids names of someone I already knew as I had existing associations (both of mine were too 100, one top 30 or 40, so not uncommon, but I didn’t want any existing personal associations in my mind)

It’s funny, the idea of “oh, it’s too popular now, I’ve heard it before” is actually just people being part of name fashion/trends. The same way fashion and music falls in an out of favour, there is a tendency for names to get popular for a while until people have collectively heard them enough and moved on to the next. All of which is fine. The snobbery bit comes in when you’re judging other people’s name choices.

My only thoughts on other people’s choices are that it does sometimes seem that there there is too much worry about how popular a name is. It always seems a shame to me to pass up a name you really like because of worries it’s too popular and pick something you like less.

@OloBo

I get the desire to not have your child be one of several in their class, however, it is less likely these days and as PP have said, it’s not possible to control.

I personally didn’t want to call my kids names of someone I already knew as I had existing associations (both of mine were too 100, one top 30 or 40, so not uncommon, but I didn’t want any existing personal associations in my mind)

It’s funny, the idea of “oh, it’s too popular now, I’ve heard it before” is actually just people being part of name fashion/trends. The same way fashion and music falls in an out of favour, there is a tendency for names to get popular for a while until people have collectively heard them enough and moved on to the next. All of which is fine. The snobbery bit comes in when you’re judging other people’s name choices.

My only thoughts on other people’s choices are that it does sometimes seem that there there is too much worry about how popular a name is. It always seems a shame to me to pass up a name you really like because of worries it’s too popular and pick something you like less.

Exactly my point. People passing on names because they feel it’s to popular, despite them really liking a name. Sad really.

I think the 'snobbery' arises when people choose rather outlandish names or those of B list celebrities. Nobody objects to Sarah, Charlotte and David because they are classic and never really go out of fashion.

As someone with a uncommon (different culture) name, I'd probably have been preferred to have an easy name. It makes first days difficult. Even today when we order takeaways etc (unofficial settings where I need to give a name, for ease I often give DP's (unisex) name or anyone that I am with's name).

I do like that its unique and i have never met anyone with my name but I would prefer it to have been easy to say/spell.

I’m not sure it’s snobbery regarding name popularity (though there certainly is a lot of name snobbery in general). There’s probably a few reasons why popular names get called overdone and too popular on here though. I don't think pointing out popularity is 'bashing' a name though.

People who post on a Baby Names sub forum will probably be more interested in baby names than most people, and generally speaking people whose more interested in names, look for names outside of the top 100 names. I often mention popularity as first time parents often aren’t aware of current name trends, so will post saying that they like names like Luna or Arlo, so I’ll note that they are trendy, popular names. That’s not a criticism of the names, but a fact that may or many not be important when choosing a name. I wouldn’t say ‘too popular’ because I think to subjective for me to decide!

But when you say nobody had an issue when we were in school and certain names were popular, that’s not true for everyone. I had a very popular name, and it bothered me that at school I would always have to be called Toast X, so I would look for a less common name. I imagine many the posts mentioning popularity in a negative will come from people with similar popular names.

@toastofthetown

I’m not sure it’s snobbery regarding name popularity (though there certainly is a lot of name snobbery in general). There’s probably a few reasons why popular names get called overdone and too popular on here though. I don't think pointing out popularity is 'bashing' a name though.

People who post on a Baby Names sub forum will probably be more interested in baby names than most people, and generally speaking people whose more interested in names, look for names outside of the top 100 names. I often mention popularity as first time parents often aren’t aware of current name trends, so will post saying that they like names like Luna or Arlo, so I’ll note that they are trendy, popular names. That’s not a criticism of the names, but a fact that may or many not be important when choosing a name. I wouldn’t say ‘too popular’ because I think to subjective for me to decide!

But when you say nobody had an issue when we were in school and certain names were popular, that’s not true for everyone. I had a very popular name, and it bothered me that at school I would always have to be called Toast X, so I would look for a less common name. I imagine many the posts mentioning popularity in a negative will come from people with similar popular names.

See I think it is snobbery. Nobody really gives a good argument, apart from saying “it’s so popular and over used”. That for me is snobbery. You are basically turning your nose up at a name purely because it’s a trendy name, rather than expressing an opinion that you don’t particularly like it. This is my point.

I think you should call your baby whatever you want. But you need to weigh up will there be 3 Alfie's in the same class? If that doesn't bother you it doesn't bother you.

@nevernotstruggling

I think you should call your baby whatever you want. But you need to weigh up will there be 3 Alfie's in the same class? If that doesn't bother you it doesn't bother you.

Exactly, but who cares if there’s 3 Alfie’s in the same class ? Why is it so important to pick a unique name for the sake of it ? You could pick a name like Jupiter and in 4 years time when your child goes to school, that name might be the trend. I just personally don’t think you should avoid names you like Just because it’s a popular name and might be a few of the same in name in your child’s school.

There's a lot of ground between overused and 'unique'. And no, we didn't want overused names for our children. But we weren't interested, at all, in being 'unique'.

What I (personally!) dislike more than consistently popular names are names that are suddenly everywhere. The sort of name that is likely to date your child to within a few years. A couple of years ago it was Evelyn, now it's Eliza.

I think popular names are fine. One reason people take against them is because they can date you badly. I have a very popular 1960s name. Just by knowing my name, it’s easy to know when I was born.

I’m one also for not liking shortened names. I don’t think Alfie etc is a real name. My reasons would be because its image to me is so negative. It has no redeeming features. It sounds babyish, it wouldn’t suit a grown-up, it’s too controlling of the parent - there’s no room for a child to create his own nickname or short form etc. I actually cannot get my head round why anyone would want to call their child such a silly name, IMO, even though I accept that is the case.

If Alfred was a really popular name, and there were loads of children called that, and not Alfie, that is fine.

Both my children have fairly popular names. Dd is top ten and ds top 50. I was really original though and chose the names because I like them not becuase i was concerned about what other think

@Tblock
I really disagree that it's snobbery to point out a fact that a popular name is popular. It's just stating a fact about the name.

If I respond to a post about a popular name saying "it's a nice name but has been very popular for a long time" that's different to being a snob and turning my nose up at it. It's just true. If that's not important to the person reading (as I assume it wouldn't be for you) they they can ignore the part about popularity. If they hadn't realised it was so popular they have that information before the baby is named

Likewise, one of my favourite names is also a noun, but that doesn't bother me, so when people mention they object to that when giving their opinion of the name, I really don't care. I certainly wouldn't call it snobbery against noun names!

My name is seen as working class by some and is used to portray a certain type of woman. On TV and film my name is never the high flyers, it is the lady on the council estate with multiple children. There is snobbery around names in general. I would much rather have a name that wasn't as common.

I think many may be in the same boat and want different for their child. I tried to pick a less popular name that was still very traditional.

@daisypond

I think popular names are fine. One reason people take against them is because they can date you badly. I have a very popular 1960s name. Just by knowing my name, it’s easy to know when I was born.

I’m one also for not liking shortened names. I don’t think Alfie etc is a real name. My reasons would be because its image to me is so negative. It has no redeeming features. It sounds babyish, it wouldn’t suit a grown-up, it’s too controlling of the parent - there’s no room for a child to create his own nickname or short form etc. I actually cannot get my head round why anyone would want to call their child such a silly name, IMO, even though I accept that is the case.

If Alfred was a really popular name, and there were loads of children called that, and not Alfie, that is fine.

Silly in your eyes though, but clearly not a silly in a lot of people’s opinion, hence the popularity. But then judging by your post, you seem of the older generation, so can understand you having that opinion which is fine. I think it’s a cool name regardless of age. I don’t think it’s controlling of the parent either. You shouldn’t give your child a name, solely based on him/her possibly changing it in the future. I think that’s ridiculous.

There's snobbery on every name despite what category it's in. Popular, unique, unusual.. there will always be snobbery and negative opinions on a name. If you like the name use it. Don't worry about what others think of it.

Watch the video of Katie Hopkins on this morning judging kids on their names. That's a fun watch 😂 and I'm sure it was like something like 90% of people disagreed with her.